Chapter 4

We drove in total silence, our view was either on the road or on Alina. I hadn't had the courage to start a conversation.

I definitely didn't want to risk telling a complete stranger about my past. i couldn't trust anybody at this point.

"My names James's by the way" I looked up realising he wanted to break the awkward silence we have been sitting in.

" Mariah" I meekly replied back.

"So what is the little gem in your arms called?" he said turning his gaze to Alina. On instinct I pulled her closer to me.

"Alina" I smiled, breathing in her scent a mixture if baby powder and vanilla.

"What if i was a rogue?" the question had played in my mind for a while.

"You don't look like a typical rogue" he raised his eyebrows at me. "Im not a threat to you or your daughter." He finally said after a moment if silence.

Ignoring his comment I decided to be brave and ask him a question. "Why do you rescue lone werwolves?"

"Why not. Its scary being alone. As an an alpha its my duty to protect and serve my pack." I inhaled sharply. The word Alpha made me become angry. "Im not arrogant"

"I never said you where" I bit back my tongue.

He sighed and then said.

" You see most of my pack are those werwolves who had been kicked out or were orphans. Orphanages are the best places to find werewolves who have been abandoned by there parents whose turned rogue. I don't want them to grow up not knowing what they truly are. Overtime they will realise who they are and that could make them go insane."

I felt bad f,r the way i had treated him. He seemed to be genuine and there was no ounce of arrogance when he spoke.

"Thank you for allowing me to be in your family" the world 'family sounded foreign to my tongue. For a moment he seemed surprise by my words but I saw him relax into his seat.

"So what were you doing in place full of human's? "

"Exiled." I said bluntly. Everything I had been through makes it easy everyday moving on. But still part of me missed the place I grew up with once a happy family. Thinking back Adam made me frown. Just the happy memories we have shared and the painful ones to haunted me.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked." Guilt was written all over his face. I didn't really care anymore and he shouldn't feel pity for me, its better this way.

"What about you?" I questioned him.

"Left home and decided to travel for a while."

"Your not like many alphas are you?"

"What am I not charming enough." I cracked a small grin. "do i see a smile" he turned towards me.

"You didn't answer the question" I prodded further. This would be the only way i could suss him out.

"I suppose I'm not your textbook Alpha. I just want my pack to be happy and carefree. Plus Im not into all that hierarchy and mate business" he bashed the word 'mate' making me frown.

" you don't believe in mates?" I looked at him in disbelief.

I believe in them more than I should since i was wounded by my own.

"I just think the theory is wrong and stupid. I don't intend on finding a mate." I wondered if he was right. Of course he wasn't, we all have a mate out there somewhere. "So what about you?" I looked up at him confused, in his piercing grey eyes. "Have you found your mate?"

"Yes" I shrugged off all the emotions I was feeling talking about my mate.

Just remembering my father talking about mates with me, telling me how he'd keep me safe and he'll love me no matter who I am? But I guess my father was wrong for once, my mate broke me. I felt my body become rigid at the thought. I felt like I became nothing.

For some odd reason my body began to betray me. my eyes swelled with tears. i couldn't hold back as a son escaped me.

"Are you okay?" his attention was on me, only me.

Ignoring is the best I could do.

He looked down at me sadly and knowingly. "He rejected you didn't he?" He said but his voice had a soothing effect on me.

I wasn't going to let him see me like this. I didn't want him to feel sympathy for me. I didn't need it.

I am not the only she- werewolf to get rejected by her mate, and I need to stop acting like I am. I need to be in happy thoughts, thinking about starting fresh. I can't be like Adam and become selfish.

But it was the memory's that haunted me. a flashback in the forest occurred and that had driven me over the edge. my sob grew louder.

" I'm sorry." He stopped the car and parked in a space beside the road. He put one hands behind my back cautiously while the other one wrapped around me. I flinched from the touch but soon I relaxed as he held me tighter. The way I held into Alina.

"If it's any consolation you know he won't stand a chance living without you"

I couldn't move, but I agreed with him silently. As much torture it had been for me for the last 9 month his would be triple. Because I have something which is part of him and he doesn't have anything. He has nothing to remember his mate by; only the memory of me to him: him kicking me out, rejecting me and lastly the images of him hurting me.