I was asleep, passed out on Rogue's couch after a failed attempt at waiting for him. I didn't tell him I was coming over to see him. Actually, I never planned anything out. I just found myself being restless and unable to go on another day without talking to him. I guess this was what love was—feeling restless with the need to see that important person in your life. That was how I felt, especially after the way we parted. I came here to tell him that I wasn't scared anymore. I wanted to be with him. I wanted to walk around with my hand in his.

I didn't text him to tell him I was waiting for him at home; maybe that was why I slept off. The last time I took a peek at the clock, it was almost midnight. I was tired and weak. I was bound to doze off in the comfortable position I was in.

Turning around on the couch, the sound of my phone falling to the hard floor was what woke me up. My eyes fluttered open and I twisted around to pick it up when I found Rogue sitting on the coffee table, watching me–lips parted in a sexy smile and hazel eyes pinned on mine. I was suddenly awake, the remnants of sleep leaving my eyes.

He hadn't changed yet; he was still in his navy suit and his briefcase still laid beside him. He had both hands on his knees and I could tell he had been sitting there for quite some time. I scrambled to sit and rubbed my eyes, instantly feeling calm and wide awake. It was still dark outside, so he hadn't spent the night outside then.

Rogue grabbed my hand, swallowing it in his own as my attention drifted to his face. "How did you sleep? Good?"

"Yeah," I replied. "When did you get here? And what time is it?"

"Late enough to spend the night here." A smile, two steps, and he was seated next to me. That smile made my heart thump the way it did the first time I saw him. A second after that, my lips were pressed against his cheek, my hands buried in his hair.

"Yeah, I wasn't planning on leaving anyway."

"Hmm," he mumbled. Despite my best smile, he didn't trust that I wouldn't walk out. Despite his best efforts, I could tell lunch was still on his mind. He added in a smooth, deep voice, "That's the only time you allow yourself to be with me. I can't say nighttime isn't my favorite time." His hand was on my thigh but it didn't move, almost as if to assure me that his remark was light.

"You sound happy, but you don't exactly look it," I noted.

He tossed me a grin. "Oh?"

I sighed, shifting around on the couch and tucked my legs under me. "You're surface happy, Rogue. You don't have to pretend. We both know you'd rather put some distance between us—at least until you're not annoyed with me, which I know will happen tomorrow. You will wake up and you will forget what happened, but I will still feel on edge."

When I sat there tense and silent for too long, Rogue finally replied, "Why?"

"Because I hate that I'm putting you through this. Being with you...all I want is to take away all the pain you've been through and I promised you that. I was so worried about what other people might say about us that I forgot the one who matters is you. How you feel matters more than how they feel."

He made a soft sound and dropped his hand from my lap, turning onto his back to gaze up at the ceiling. Panic flared inside my chest, burning hot. I wrapped my arms around my legs and hugged them to myself, watching him.

"You were right," I added after a beat. "I'm selfish and I didn't realize what this meant to you. By trying to hide this relationship, I'm pouring more salt into your wounds. I said I was going to help, but I didn't try. You hid away from everyone and when I suggested hiding our relationship, I didn't consider how this could affect you. I'm sorry."

"Is this how it's going to be?" His voice was flat, not giving me much to work with. A knife plunged through my heart, scared that this could be his final straw and what I would be looking at is a breakup. I didn't want to assume that yet. I tried to keep some distance between us to give him space enough to breathe so he wouldn't think being with me was suffocating.

"Hmm?" I gave him an innocent look.

Rogue turned his head to look at me, dragging me against his chest and pinned me there so I was sitting between his spread legs, chained by his arms. "You linking everything to what happened to me," he explained, his voice achingly raw. "You don't have to feel guilty when something you do or would do makes you think it will remind me of what I went through and hurt me. You don't have to go back on your words and your own feelings for me. If you believe what you're doing is right, then I should hope that you would continue to be that kind of woman who follows her heart. Don't bend your own feelings for me, Beth. Don't feel guilty or apologize for having your own wishes and your own feelings, do you understand?"

My pulse was flying. "I don't—"

"This is something I foresee happening in the future, so I'm putting a stop to it before it happens." His voice rose a little. "You came here to tell me you've changed your mind."

"Yes."

"Then I'm here to tell you I don't think you should change your mind. If you think our relationship is better in secret, I'm completely behind your decision. If you're not comfortable, there is no need to rush. After all, telling them or not telling them won't gain us anything. There's no reward for it. This thing we have....it's for us, not for me. I need you to know that so we can close the chapter. I'm afraid the more we talk about it, the more I think it might cost us."

"I'm ready," I pressed on as he held me. Though I couldn't see his face and he couldn't see mine, our voices spoke for us. "I want to tell everyone that you're mine. I want every bit of you to be happy."

Rogue turned me over to face him. He rested his hand on the back of my head, caressing my hair as he searched my face. His eyes glazed over in a look I had never seen. I had seen them happy, seen them angry, seen them filled with longing, but I had never witnessed them like this. They were different, deep, a pool of emotions collecting beneath their surface.

"Do you have any idea how happy I am being with you? I didn't think I'd have you."

"You would have."

"You would have agreed to be with me," he corrected. "but there were zero chances that you and I could have been together." His voice was strange. Low and devoid of emotion, except for a faint trace of darkness. "That is why I cherish every moment spent with you, and everything you want, I try to make it possible." His voice was getting odder and odder. It was fervent, like I was a buried treasure that he discovered, and getting his hands on it was more of an obstacle than finding it.

I struggled to understand what he was trying to say, so I just said, "There was no way you could have lost me." And I meant it.

Rogue was still and silent again, and I wasn't sure if that was the end of the conversation, until he murmured, "I would have...I still could."

Leaning back, I furrowed my brow in confusion. "You're calling a break up before it even happens? Do you see a breakup in our future?" I studied his expression, my fingers shaking a little.

"I won't break up with you."

"And I won't break up with you so why the hell are we talking about this?" Tension filled the air as I stared at him, my heart firing off warning shots. Nervousness punched through me, tightening my chest to the point where I felt like I couldn't breathe.

Rogue's hands slid to my hips, wild in their grip, as he hovered his mouth over mine. I closed my eyes, surrendering to his warmth as I clutched his shoulders, meeting his lips. Every time we kissed, he tasted different, better than the last time.

"Fuck, Beth, I could kiss you for days," he growled, sucking my bottom lip between his teeth. He licked into my mouth, his kiss growing relentless with each uneven breath we took.

Was this a distraction? This felt like a distraction but I honestly didn't care enough to pull away from him. Without breaking our kiss, he lifted me with him off the couch and walked a few feet, sitting me on the bar counter as he wedged himself between my thighs before he drew my legs up around his waist. I rested my palms on the marble, my gaze pinned to the hungry look prowling his face.

"Tell me how it went with you and Pete," he commanded, his eyes connected to mine. "Are you attracted to him the same way you're attracted to me?"

His words blew my fucking mind, simply because I didn't expect him to say that not while he was mere inches from touching me and my body was aching, reacting to his proximity. I was turned on, and he was talking about Pete.

"Don't worry, he's not you," I replied as I pulled him closer, wanting him to touch me. To talk about anything but Pete. There was so much he could do right now.

A smirk kicked up the corner of his lips. "That's not what I asked. However, I'll believe you."

He crashed his lips to mine, coaxing them open with a slow sweep of his tongue. Rogue licked into my mouth, making me feel all his warmth and scent. His hand snaked up to my thigh. On instinct, I brought my hands to his hair, gripping the waves.

He picked me up and I giggled when he slapped my ass, walking with me to his bedroom. He opened the door with his leg and strode to the bed, tossing me on it. I landed with a bounce, and before I could recover, he was already on top of me, kissing me. He ripped my shirt, the buttons scattering onto the bed with a few that bounced off the bed. He slipped the edge of my bra down, palmed my brea$t, and flicked his tongue across my n$pple. I surged forward, my body's primal need to fuck exploding.

His phone rang in his pocket. He stilled and groaned against my chest.

"Ignore it," I breathed without a second thought. I needed, wanted, and ached for this.

He did. He ignored it, and a gasp left me as his mouth came over mine again. He kissed me like he wanted me and desired me. He touched me, every little burning right through me.

The phone cut and rang again.

"Shit." He pulled away from me and stared down at me. "It might be important."

"Am I not important?" I panted, digging my fingers into his skull.

"Baby, you know you are."

I gripped his hair tighter and pulled his face to mine, my eyes fierce. "Then kiss me. Touch me. Make love to me."

Rogue buried his face against my neck and his hands slid into my jeans. A gasp shot from my throat over the delicious pleasure I got. His phone continued to ring. He bit hard on my neck, licking and sucking the bruises. He leaned back again, his warm breath flirting over my lips as he stared into my eyes. His fingers pulled out and touched them to my lips, sliding them into my mouth. I accepted them without reserve, sucking my moisture from his fingers.

"I'm sorry, I have to take the call." Over his glazed eyes, he fisted the back of my hair and met his lips with me, giving me a chaste kiss, then he was off me before I could breathe.

He walked out of the room and left me breathing half-naked and horny. I flipped over the bed and the sheets grazing over my sensitive n$pples made me moan.

I crawled towards the edge of the bed, letting one arm hang to the floor while I lay there with my eyes closed, taking each breath slow and steady. When I turned around, my fingers bumped into something peeking from underneath the bed. My eyes snapped open and I shifted, dragging the thick files out. I turned it around and the label on the first file caught my eye, and now my curiosity got the better of me. Written in black, bold letters were two initials; BW.

Sitting up, I pulled the sheets around my chest. With my heart pounding for an unknown reason, I opened it up. At first, there was a lot. So many pages of information, but the very first thing that stood out the most was my name plastered on the first page. There was all kinds of information on me. My birth certificate was there. My transcripts from university. My bank account and the previous account that I had closed. A copy of mine and Lauren's rental lease for our flat back in London, which was still getting its monthly payment, unknowingly to me. Another copy was my passport.

There was so much more that had my head pounding and my hands cold. Pictures of me with Lauren, with Athena, and Aaron. Pictures of me alone, at a club, or with a hookup. My parents and my siblings. Copies of my essays from university. A list of the items that I brought with me to New York. Receipts from the stuff that I bought and threw away. A copy of the rental lease of the flat I lived in right now and Fallon's information.

And then there were papers regarding my old boss who was a sleaze bag, documents that he was charged and found guilty of sexual assault. That, I didn't know happened. The date showed that he was prosecuted a month after I left the job. A letter of recommendation to Robert Sinclair with my name on it, signed by Rogue Slade. All my debts were cleared, also paid by Rogue Slade. Another payment receipt was there, this one, for the time I was out of a job and didn't have enough money to pay rent, which the landlord let me off the hook for that month because 'apparently, I was such a good tenant.' But what he meant to say was that someone already paid for the next three years. Another document was a bank account under my name, in which all the rent money that I paid to my landlord was moved into.

It took me another few minutes to go through all the files, and when I finished, my hands were shaking. My head and heart were hammering. I slipped out of the bed, topless and weak. My chest was so tight that I couldn't breathe. I didn't know what to think, how to think, but I knew for sure that I felt violated. I felt the lack of privacy and secrecy. I was bared. I was naked in the eyes of Rogue.

Then he walked in, with a smile on his face which shattered the moment he looked at my face, then slid his gaze to the files on the bed and he froze. He looked absolutely terrified.

Rogue's eyes shifted back to me, which had already turned darker than when he had walked in. He was tense. His eyes were wild. His breathing was shallow. His hands clenched and unclenched, and I couldn't decide if he was scared, angry, or something else, but whatever it was, I didn't care.

He headed directly for me, but I took a step back. He saw my hesitation and halted, his brows pinching together. It was hard to breathe. My entire body felt hot.

"You've been stalking me?" The words that I tried to deny left my lips. They were so loud and they exploded around us. His gaze was blisteringly intense. His jaw worked, but he didn't say anything. "You've seen me before I came to New York?" My breath hitched. "You met me in London?"

"We didn't meet," he retorted sharply.

"No, of course, we didn't. You must have preferred stalking," I said in a beat, adding, "and violating my privacy. How dare you?"

"It's not what you think."

"Papers don't lie, Rogue. Everything in those files is real, so don't try and lie to me." I caught myself in a disbelief sound. "Do you even know how I feel right now? I feel violated. I never gave you the right to—" I stopped myself because saying it made me angry.

I took a step forward. "You had the chance to be honest with me. You had the chance to come clean about all of these things, but you didn't. You hid this from me. Why? Because you intend to continue what you've been doing?"

"That's not true."

"Don't lie to me!"

My chest heaved. I wanted to scream in frustration. I wanted to punch him in the face. I wanted to smash something, anything. My voice came out raw, "If you wanted to know something about me, why didn't you come to me and ask? Why did you have to go around my back and get hold of things that you shouldn't have? Things that are none of your business?" My hands started to shake. I was breathless with hurt and anger.

Rogue's chest was heaving. He ran angry fingers through his hair and fisted his hands at his nape.

"Maybe it's because you've never been violated," I added in a breathless whisper. It must be anger, but before I made the conscious decision to, I was saying, "but I guess Pete will relate more. After all, you've violated him as well." It was in a moment of heat when I said that, but I regretted it immediately after. The look Rogue gave me pinched my heart. He clenched his fists as I stared at him, wounded and horrified, unable to move.

He stopped a foot away and looked into my eyes. Then he looked down with a dejected sigh before he zoomed past me to the bed. I didn't turn around, but I heard him walking back to me with the files in his hands. He didn't open them, but I guessed he already knew the contents.

His eyes returned to mine, the impassive mask he wore so easily slipped over his face. "The files don't belong to me," he revealed. "They're Pete's. I didn't know about any of this until he gave them to me because he thought there was no reason to hold onto them anymore."

A wave of nausea slammed the pit of my stomach as his words hit me like a harsh winter, and with each word, I flinched.

They weren't his. They were Pete's. Pete was the one who had stalked me? Collected all my information? The reality hit me hard, knocking the air out of me. I felt like I was going to throw up.

"I couldn't tell you because this was a lot and I didn't know how you'd react. I was doing him a favor." His head was low, his hair hung in his eyes. "I asked him why he did all of this and if he knew you before you came to America. He did. He met you in London two years ago."

"Why would—" My lips trembled. "Why would he—"

"He's been hooked on you from the moment he saw you. I don't know if it's love or obsession, I didn't ask. I didn't ask because when I first saw it, all I wanted to do was hit him in the face. You're mine, and no one has to take care of you or look out for you except me." His eyes flashed with anger and then cooled just as quickly. "What he did wasn't right...invading your privacy like that. It fucks with my mind every time I remember that he's helped you when I didn't know who you were. Beth, when you needed help, I wasn't there."

"You didn't know me," I cut in sharply, feeling the embarrassment and regret washing all over me.

"Bottom line is, Pete was there. I'm sure he's helped you more than what is in here." He waved the files at me, his beautiful eyes vulnerable and hurt. "And that's why when he told me about this, I couldn't come forward to you. I told myself that I wasn't going to help myself if I did, and in the strangest corners of my mind, I believed that was the right thing to do."

My heart clenched tight. Rogue fisted his hand into his hair and let out a frustrated breath.

"I didn't want to hide it from you because I was scared of your response," he admitted, propped his hands on his hips, and exhaled heavily. It was like he was struggling to admit his feelings but he didn't have to tell me. I already knew his worst fear. He sucked in a breath before continuing, "I was afraid you were going to run to him."

My hand went to my throat and stayed there, shaking. I stood there, helplessly quaking like a leaf.

"The idea that you would go to him has been messing up with my mind. I don't know what to do, but whatever decision you make, I'm going to accept it."