I let out a small groan as my eyes fluttered awake. I was slightly uncomfortable and a bit stiff as I looked over to the bed Rowan was on. He was still asleep.

Blinking several times, I rubbed my eyes as I tried to get them to focus more.

"Morning." I heard the soft whisper. Who else is here?

I turned my head and noticed I was leaning up against Ryder, his arm around my shoulder. I jolted upright, brushing the hair off my face.

"You know, it's okay to fall asleep on me, but I would recommend a bed next time." Ryder joked.

"There won't be a next time." I snapped quietly to him as I got up. I moved to the chair closer to Rowan as I looked at my phone. 7:15am. Three text messages and a Facebook message.

I answered them and looked back at Rowan. He had some colour back in his cheeks, looking so angelic while he slept.

I couldn't believe I fell asleep against Ryder, but I don't remember that. Maybe I didn't and leaned against him in my sleep.

The last thing I remembered last night was thinking to myself that maybe Ryder and I could be friends. For Rowan.

Then it hit me. I do have an assessment, maybe that's what I can do it on. The aftermath of a divorce, it's impact on adults and children.

"Rhea. Can we talk." Ryder called to me as I turned my eyes to him. Inwardly groaning, I got up off the chair and went outside the room.

"Would you like a coffee?"

"Is that what you wanted to talk about?" I whispered.

"Well, no. You win."

I blinked several times. "I won? Won what?" I watched the emotions play on Ryder's face as he took my hand.

I felt the emotions crawl in to me. Sadness and loss and grief. I did my best not to cry, it was overwhelming.

"I know you don't want us to work out. I've been fighting for us, I've given you space to think about it and I've been trying not to overwhelm you with this."

I was overwhelmed. Am I feeling Ryder's emotions? I didn't feel like this seconds ago. I was feeling worried and concerned, not grief.

"I'm going to let you have it your way. You have been trying to tell me that you've moved on and I didn't want to believe you. I wasn't ready to move on. Not since our apparent divorce."

I was too shocked to say anything.

"If you want a divorce, I'll give it to you. If you want to have relationships with other people, that's fine. Just as long as I can still keep seeing Rowan."

I couldn't believe my ears. "Are you serious?" I croaked out.

"I'll be happy, even if I pick up and drop off Rowan, at least I get to see you still."

I looked in to Ryder's eyes, searching for something. But all I found was the truth.

"I still love you, Rhea. But I'm not going to hold you back and keep you if it makes you miserable."

I tried asking where did all this come from, but I was speechless. Ryder actually listened to me.

Ryder let my hands go as he stepped back. "I'll go get those coffees." He said as he spun around, walking away, his back to mine.

I was left there wide eyed as I watched him disappear from the hall.

But the emotions that plagued me stayed and it took me a couple more minutes to realise that I wasn't feeling Ryder any more. The emotions belonged to me.

I quickly went to the bathroom and locked the door as I went to the sink. Oh god. Have I really been feeling this and just keeping them at bay? I felt like I did years ago. When Ryder kicked me out. When he accused me of having an affair.

The only difference was, he didn't kick me out this time. He let me go and that hurt more than I ever thought it would, as I watched myself cry in the mirror.

****

After Rowan was discharged from hospital he sat in the back seat talking non stop about anything that popped in his mind.

Apart from his babbling, the car ride home was quiet. Ryder and I didn't really talk. I don't know about Ryder, but I was still feeling raw.

Ryder pulled in to my driveway, behind my car and I got out and got Rowan's bag as Ryder got his son. I never noticed till I walked to the front door and saw the package on the landing.

The large bouquet of red roses and three helium filled balloons were waiting for us. I picked up the card and read it.

My thoughts are with you. The roses for a beautiful but worried mother and the balloons for her son, to help his mother smile again. I'll see you soon, Luke x.

I was flattered as I leaned over and opened my door before picking the package up and taking it inside.

I should be the one making up for cutting our date short, not Luke. But it was awfully sweet of him.

"Balloon, Momma, please." Rowan asked as I untied the ribbons. I gave them to Rowan as he ran to his room.

"So are you and him exclusive?" I heard from behind me.

"No." I answered as I smelt the flowers. "But that is none of your concern." I added as I looked for a vase. The last lot of roses had wilted and died and I replaced them with my new ones.

"I just don't want to see you get hurt."

Frowning, I turned to Ryder. "Like you hurt me?"

I saw the regret on his face and it made me want to swallow my words, but my tongue wouldn't stop. "What are we now? Friends?" I snarled. "You're my ex, Ryder. Rowan's father. Nothing more."

I didn't realise I had let my guard down until earlier today and I was instantly replacing the bricks I didn't know Ryder took.

"I would like for us to get along, for Rowan's sake." He answered, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Then the less time we spend together, the more we will get along." Came my smart reply.

What is wrong with me? That was a bit nasty. I quickly turned and made my way to Rowan's room, eyes wide.

I was at his door when I heard a knock on my front door.

"Can you get that please. It's probably Sasha." I yelled out as I went to Rowan. He was sitting on his floor, playing with his cars. It's the first time I was truly thankful that Rowan preferred toys over electronics.

A smile on my face as I watched Rowan make his cars have a crash.

"Who are you?" I heard Ryder snarl. I have this feeling it isn't Sasha at the door. But she is the only one I told that I was back home. She was gonna try and squeeze in a visit on her lunch. I quickly scrambled to the entry and froze at what I saw.

There was no way I wanted this. Not these two, not together.

Ryder was standing tall, his hands in fists, glaring at Luke.

"Luke!" I smiled as I composed myself. "What a surprise. I thought you had left already." I went to him, giving Ryder a pointed look.

"I'm gonna go on the next flight. Just wanted to make sure everything was alright with the young one."

I turned my back to Ryder since he wasn't moving away, giving us privacy. "That's very sweet of you. He loves the balloons. And thank you for the flowers. They are gorgeous."

I heard Ryder clear his throat, a deliberate attempt to get my attention. Sighing I turned to Ryder.

"Ryder, this is Luke. Luke, this is my ex, Ryder." I gritted out.

"Husband, actually." Ryder made no attempt to move or shake Luke's waiting hand.

"Soon to be, officially, ex husband." I growled at Ryder, my eyes narrowed.

"Yes." He curled his lip up.

"It's okay. I've gotta go now though." Luke smiled at me. I walked with him to outside.

"I'm sorry. He is just being difficult."

"There's no need to apologise. I didn't come here to see him." Luke said softly as he wrapped his arms around me. "I came to see you."

I allowed myself to go in to his embrace. "You're too sweet."

"I just want to see if you're okay before I leave for the week."

"Have a safe flight." I told him, starting the farewell process. I gave Luke a quick kiss as he released me and went to his car.

I watched in contentment as Luke drove off. Once out off my sight, I sighed, slumping my shoulders. Now Ryder.

Heading to the kitchen, I decided to do up a snack for Rowan when Ryder started his questionnaire.

"Is that who you're seeing? Isn't that the same person as the other night at the bowls club? The one you said was a work function?"

I rolled my eyes as I sliced up the cheese.

"It is, isn't it?"

I placed the cheese on the plate and turned to Ryder. "What's your point?" I growled as I placed some crackers on to Rowan's plate.

"Isn't that your boss?" Ryder frowned at me.

"Ryder. I don't have time for this."

"You never have time." He snapped. "Are you sleeping with him?"

I needed to say something that won't give me away. "It doesn't matter to you if I am or not. But when I do, I won't be telling you." I was wrong to think that we could be friends.

"Sleeping with your boss gives a whole new level of danger. What if you two don't work out? That's your job at the magazine gone, the paper as well. Then what's the point of you getting your masters?"

"Plus the radio station." I mumbled out, but Ryder heard me.

"Radio station?"

I ignored him as I put grapes on Rowan's plate and called him out for it. Rowan appeared immediately and sat at the table and I gave him a small cup of milk.

"Rhea, what radio station?"

I haven't even told Gabriel about that yet, I know she will flip.

"I got offered another job." I told him bluntly as I left Rowan at the table.

"Another job opportunity? Don't you think that's odd? First you get offered a place at a newspaper than a radio station. Is he rewarding you for the sex?"

I snapped to Ryder, my hand flying as it slapped across his cheek and jaw. "Get out!" I yelled at him. "I will not have you here accusing me of being a slut."

Ryder rubbed his cheek, his eyes darkened.

"Maybe I will take that job. At least I'll be far away from you. I will not have Rowan growing up with an influence like you around him!"

"Where's this job posted at?" Ryder hissed.

"None of your business. Now get out!" I growled again.

"You won't be moving away. I won't allow it!" I saw how his hands balled up before he stormed to me. "You can't take my child away from me."

I glared at him, eyes narrowed. "Watch me. I don't care if I have to take Rowan with me to a different continent, as long as you're far away."

"Where?" He spat.

I stayed tight lipped. I felt arms around my legs and looked down at Rowan staring at me, his face ready to drop and cry. I sighed as I picked him up, holding him close to me.

"I think you should leave." I spoke in a calmer voice.

"Momma. No fighting." Rowan cried out to me as he wrapped his little arms around my neck.

Ryder stared at me and Rowan before stepping back. "This ain't over, Rhea. I will find out and in the process, I will get a temporary court order if I have to, to keep you in this state."

I kept my back straight and head high as I watched Ryder kiss Rowan's head before leaving.

I need to talk to Gabriel.