Flashback

Rhea looked wide eyed at the scene around her. The Big Apple. The buildings were tall, the streets loud and busy, the roads covered in yellow taxis.

Keeping her hands firm on the pram, Rhea felt overwhelmed. Gabriel had to work today, she had students to assess. But that didn't bother Rhea.

She had gone shopping in some of the world's best known shops. It took her even longer than she wanted as she had constantly had to mentally convert American dollars and Australian dollars. But now she needed to find Central Park. Rowan, only thirteen months old was fast asleep in the pram, oblivious to the sight around him.

Sighing, she asked a stranger for directions and was shrugged off by them. Determined, she went to someone else, another person pushing a pram. Maybe they will be more welcoming.

"Excuse me?" I called to her as she sat at a bench. The lady looked up at her. "Which way to Central Park?"

The lady gave her a small but warm smile. "Down that way." She pointed. "Stay on 8th Avenue. You can't miss it."

Rhea gave her a smile. "Thank you." She started walking, fastening her pace. She had to meet Gabriel at a certain spot when Gabriel finished work and she didn't want to be late and admit that she got lost.

Now

"What?" Gabriel screeched over the phone. "Are you taking it?"

I sighed as I played with my wine glass. "I don't know. I threatened Ryder I will. He doesn't know where or when. All I said was a different country."

"The call is yours." Gabriel said in a calmer voice.

"I know. But it's not now. I've involved Ryder and unfortunately, he also has a say. 50% of a say, in fact."

"Oh darling. What's he going to do if you just pack up and leave?"

"I can't. Not yet anyway. I have to renew Rowan's passport. He has changed a bit from last time I got him one." I took a sip. "Besides, Ryder threatened me about getting a temp custody order to prevent me taking Rowan. I'm not leaving him."

"Maybe you can get granted the right to leave." Gabriel insinuated.

"Not on the grounds that I just want to get away from him. I mean, he isn't violent, or abusive, or a threat in anyway."

"But for your career, you might get to."

"Maybe." I breathed out as I topped up my wine glass. "But a part of me doesn't want to go and do it."

"Are some old feelings resurfacing?"

"No!" I snapped. "From what I've seen so far, Ryder is a great dad. Rowan adores him and they have created this bond, a father and son bond and I don't want to destroy that."

"Because of Ryder? Or Rowan?"

"Because of Rowan." I groaned out. "I knew this would come and kick me in the butt."

I heard Gabriel sigh. "Look, Rhea. The choice is yours whether you do this or not. I don't want you to come to New York just because of me."

"It won't be just because of you." I laughed nervously. "It will be nice to know someone there though."

"Yeah." Gabriel went silent for a few minutes.

"What's up?" I asked her.

"My contract with the school is up in a couple months."

"Didn't they offer you a new one?"

"Yeah, they did." I heard some noises in the background on the phone. "But I'm not taking it."

"Oh. Then what will you be doing?"

"Teaching still, just not in New York. Or America."

"Okay. Where's your next big adventure going?" I asked her before finishing of the wine in my glass.

"Home."

I spat out the wine in my mouth. "Home?" I coughed out. "You're coming home?" I couldn't help but smile.

"Yeah. I miss my parents, you. I miss Australia. Besides the timing is perfect on my end." She added. "My Visa is about to expire."

"Really?" I went and got a clothe to clean up my mess. "That's great, I think."

"You think?" Gabriel laughed.

"Well, yeah. If you're happy with that decision, I'm happy for you."

"No, your just happy that you get to see me more regularly." Gabriel joked.

"That too."

****

I rang my office number as I slammed the magazine down. Another week, a new magazine, not my advice. The phone rang out to the voicemail.

"Ashley! Pick up the goddamn phone!" I snapped in to it. "This week is worse than last week. I know you're there, pick up the phone!" I grunted in frustration as I hung up.

That man. He has it all wrong. Why did I agree to this?

I'm in front of my studies, I just finished my assessment on divorce and it's impacts and submitted it. Plus I've already got a head start on my next piece, not that I got to choose this time. Childhood and adolescents, the psychology behind their moods.

I've got a toddler, I haven't and don't deal with many other children, let alone teenagers.

I opened up my web browser and did some research, a pile of recommended books next to the laptop.

I was buried deep in between the books and the screen, my full coffee cup now ice cold when there was a knock on my door.

I swear if that's Ryder, I'm going to scream. I haven't seen him since our argument, but he rings every afternoon for Rowan, not that Rowan understands. He just holds the phone and goes through the house calling for him.

I opened the door and was surprised by my visitor.

"Ashley." I gritted out. "I left you a message. You could have just rang back."

Ashley strolled in with an air of arrogance. "Three messages to me and a phone call to Jan." He corrected. "Apparently I've done something wrong."

I closed my door and went to him, hands on my hips. "Apparently? You have. No one is gonna believe that's me replying. That's the whole idea of what you're doing. Pretending to be me."

"It's a bit hard to get the sense of you when you bombard me with phone calls."

I gasped at him, giving out a half laugh. "I do not!"

"I was hired so you could have a holiday. To catch up on your studies. I still have another three weeks. So live with it, darlin'."

I fluttered my eyes. "Darlin'?" I smiled. "That column is my baby. I don't want you ruining it, morphing it to something else."

"Are you always this stressed and tense?"

"No!" I coughed out. "But the mutilation of my column gets me wound up." I stepped closer to him. Ashley grinned at me as he stayed still, in a relaxed pose.

"Then stop buying the magazine. What you don't know won't hurt."

"You're infuriating!"

"You're bossy." Ashley threw back.

"You're pigheaded."

"You're demanding."

"You're an arse." I snapped out. What happened next was a bit of a whirlwind blur. I was standing before him, mad at him and the next thing I knew was we were kissing, in my room, half naked.

Instead of pushing him off me and aside, I helped Ashley get his pants off, our lips locked as I felt him undo my bra.

I don't know what came over me, but I decided not to fight it and just go with it. I was home alone, Rowan at school and I was suppose to be studying. But instead, I let Ashley do things to me, kiss me, touch me, have me.

****

I quickly got dressed and waited out in the kitchen for Ashley. He came out after me, pulling his shirt on.

"Hey," He gave me an awkward smile.

"Listen, Ashley," I started. "That, what just happened," This felt so hard to explain. "I just don't want you reading too much into that."

Ashley smirked as he raised an eyebrow. "You mean, it was just sex and nothing else?"

"Well, yeah."

I heard Ashley sigh. Was that relief? "Good. I was worried you might have thought something else out off that." It was relief.

"That's never going to happen again." I told him as I fixed the hem of my shirt.

Ashley just smirked at me as he went to the front door. "Does that mean you're gonna stop hounding me with the phone calls?"

I bit my tongue as I took a deep breathe before smiling and shaking my head. "I wouldn't hound you if you would just pretend to be me."

"Being a girl sucks." He said back to me.

I shrugged off his comment. "Oh well, you took the job. You only need to pretend you have a vagina for three more weeks."

I saw the dreamy look on his face and I knew I had lost him to his day dream. A small smile formed. "I can do that." He grinned as he left.

I went back to my laptop, feeling slightly better as I placed on my glasses and continued from where I left off.

****

"Come on, sweetheart." I coaxed Rowan as I took his hand, walking up the stairs. We had a brunch with Michelle and Arnold and Rowan has gone all shy again.

"Is daddy here?" Came his small squeak.

"I don't know. But nan and pop are." I smiled as I knocked on the door. I hope Ryder isn't here. It's been over a week since I saw him last and I really didn't want to see him any time soon.

"I want dad." He demanded.

Sighing, I knelt down to Rowan's level. "First, we will see nan and pop, then I'll ring dad, okay?"

Rowan looked up at me, his eyes filling with tears, nodding.

The front door opened just as I gave Rowan a cuddle, picking him up.

"Hi!" Michelle answered and looked straight at Rowan. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah." I smiled. "He is just having an emotional moment." I told Michelle before whispering, "he misses Ryder."

"Oh sweetheart." Michelle cooed. "Would you like a gift?"

Rowan turned his head and shyly looked at Michelle, nodding. "Please."

"Come in, I think pop is trying to hide it from you."

Rowan picked up the playfulness in Michelle's voice and practically jumped from my arms to the floor.

"Pop!" Rowan yelled as he ran away.

"You didn't have to buy him anything." I said to Michelle as I followed her.

"It's just something little, to keep him occupied when he comes over." Michelle smiled. "If that's alright by you? Of course."

I blinked. "No. That's fine." I turned to the sitting room to see Arnold sitting on a recliner, watching Rowan play on a large wooden rocking toy that was shaped like an aeroplane.

"Look, Momma! Plane!" Rowan smiled as he waved to me.

"Wow!" I grinned before facing Arnold. "How are you?" I asked politely.

"Getting better. I think we have rain coming."

I glanced at Arnold. "Rain? It's hot."

"Arnie's knees play up when it's raining."

I laughed as I looked back to Arnold. "So you're a weather reporter?" I joked.

"Don't knock it." Arnold smiled. "What till you're my age."

I grinned as I watched Rowan. "Where did you find something like that? It's very unique."

"Arnie made it." Michelle told me.

"Oh, I forgot you are a carpenter."

"Were, dear."

Just like I forgot Michelle is a grammar nazi. I turned to her with a fake smile. "Would you like a hand, Michelle?"

"That will be fantastic." She grinned as I followed her to the kitchen.

Already plated up on serving trays were pancakes and croissants, savoury muffins and waffles, fruit salads and yoghurts. "That's quite a spread you have." I said as I grabbed a dish and moved it to her serving buffet. I noticed there were six plates set up on the table.

"Yes. I wasn't sure what to do, so I did everything." Michelle smiled as she went for another serving dish.

I helped put the last dish down when someone I hadn't seen in years came in. "Mother. Oh, Rhea, what a surprise!"

"Vince." I breathed out. My heart started beating quiet fast. What the hell? Michelle knows I can't stand Vince. I was frozen on the spot.

"Vincent. You're late, dear." Michelle stated as she turned to him and gave him a hug.

"Is that your kid with dad?" Vince asked as he eyed me off.

"That's Rowan." Michelle gleamed in a very proud manner.

"Isn't this a bit of an insult to you mum? Ryder's ex wife, here, with her child?"

I couldn't answer him. I was still frozen.

Michelle glared at him. "What?" She asked him. "Just because Rhea and Ryder are divorced doesn't mean anything."

Vince looked at his mother back to me, a smirk on his face. "Well, yeah, I mean, because she never had a child with Ryder, your son."

Michelle waved her hand at him. "Nonsense. Rowan is Ryder's child."

"What? She is obviously lying to get back at Ryder. How would you know Ryder is the father? Wasn't she the one that cheated on him?"

"Vincent. Enough." Arnold boomed as he entered the dining room.

They were all squabbling like I wasn't even in the room. But I just stood there, my legs wouldn't move, my mouth wouldn't open.

"I don't know what you are insinuating, but you're insulting not only us, but Rhea." Arnold told Vince.

"There is no need for accusations." Michelle added, in a smoother voice. "Rowan is Ryder's son. There's a test to prove it."

I went wide eyed as Vincent glared at me. "Cat got your tongue, Rhea?" He sneered as he walked out. It was only after he left the room, I could breathe better again.

Just having Vince look at me always gave me the creeps. How the hell am I to get through a brunch with my ex in laws?