Something that's pressing on my blater wakes me from sleep for what feels like seconds after I doze off, and when I slide my hand down to feel what's causing the pressure I feel a soft leg draped over my abdomen. My eyes open immediately, the small trail of daylight coming from the window telling me it's not night anymore.

I'm laying on my back, and Jo has draped herself over me. Her head is resting on my chest, her arm is laying over my abs, and her leg is thrown over my lower abdomen. My hand is now laying on her upper leg, and because it's morning and because my blater is full, my whole body is wakening. Meaning my whole body. And if I don't move the fuck away from her, Jo will be the first to feel how awake I am.

"Jo," I mumble in her hair while carefully sliding her off my body. She whimpers in an irritated way which makes me smile, and when she's off me completely she turns around, sticks her bum out my way pretty much just like Daisy did a few hours ago, and continues her sleep as if nothing happened.

All I want to do is pull her back in my arms and cuddle up against her once more, but I can't since I have to take care of my full blater, so I step out of bed to do my business.

After I'm done, I decide to brush my teeth since I won't be able to go back to sleep. I have no idea about the time, but Jo has to be at therapy at eleven which means we'll have to leave twenty minutes before that.

Just as my mouth is filled with toothpaste, the door of the bathroom opens behind me, revealing a sleepy, messy-haired Jo. Her eyes are still hanging shut slightly, and she's rubbing her left eye as she walks to where I'm standing behind the sink.

When she's standing next to me, she grabs her toothbrush and puts on some toothpaste. "Good morning," her hoarse voice says while she rinses her toothbrush and then puts it into her mouth.

I do the exact opposite and pull my brush out of my mouth. "You don't rinse beforehand?" I ask, foamy toothpaste dribbling out of my mouth.

She looks at me, her toothbrush still in her mouth and a frown between her eyes. "What?" She asks, her mouth also full of toothpaste and therefore a little less understandable.

I empty my mouth by spitting and then clarify. "You don't rinse your toothbrush."

"I just did," she argues, the toothpaste dripping down her chin which makes me laugh.

"No, you didn't. You rinsed after putting the toothpaste on." I shake my head and put my toothbrush underneath the water stream before putting on toothpaste again.

After that, we brush our teeth in silence, our eyes locking in the mirror. I can see she wants to laugh; her eyes are smiling and thereby matching my expression to a T. After a minute or so, she is the one that spits first before she puts some water in her mouth. When she's rinsing her toothbrush, she says, "you're rinsing twice?"

She puts her toothbrush in the empty cup that will hold mine in a few seconds too, and watches as I spit out the remains of toothpaste as well. "No, no, the question is, why do you rinse once?"

"Because that's what I do," she giggles. "Rinsing twice is weird."

I chuckle and wipe my mouth with a towel before putting my toothbrush next to hers. It's such a random, normal move, but I can't help but grin at the sight of her yellow and my blue tooth rush in the same cup.

"You're calling me weird?" I raise my eyebrow, and as if she sees what I'm about to do, she turns and runs out of the bathroom while giggling loudly. I follow suit, and even without using my full ability to run, I catch up with her even before she reaches my room.

I grab her waist and pull her against my front, my fingers wiggling in her sides which makes her yelp. "You're calling me weird?" I repeat, my breathing spiked slightly.

"No! No!" She laughs, her small hands on mine trying to stop the ticklish movements. "I'm not. Please stop."

I chuckle and turn her around in my arms so she looks up at me with pink cheeks and a happy expression. She's put her hair in a high ponytail now, which shows her long neck, and her skin is still a little puffy from sleep.

"Morning," I mumble, my eyes already focussing on her lips. Surely admitting we love each other means I get to kiss her every morning, right?

"Hi," she says, sounding slightly out of breath. Her eyes switch from my eyes to my mouth, and I can feel how she lifts on her toes.

I lean down to meet her halfway, and just as I feel her lips flutter against mine, Daisy decides to wake up by throwing out a pierced cry. I stop in my tracks and open my eyes, but Josephine just giggles before she stands on her toes a little more.

She gives my mouth -which is hanging open slightly because I want to announce Daisy woke even though she's clearly heard that too- a fast peck and then turns to walk to the room she first slept in too. She opens the door, and the moment she steps over the threshold, her sweet voice silences Daisy's cries.

"Good morning, sweetie. Why are you crying?"

Not a minute later, Jo comes into view again. She's holding Daisy against her chest, and only now do I notice how Daisy's hair on the back of her head is fading a little as if she's having a bold spot.

"I used to have that too," I say out loud, reminding how my mum told me that I had a bold spot on the back of my head when I was a baby. Mercy then insisted that I had a flat head too, and that it stayed even though my hair grew back. And she thinks that is hilarious.

"What?" Jo asks. She's standing in front of me now, and I can't stop myself. I lean down and kiss Daisy's head in good morning. "That bold spot on the back of her head."

"Oh," Jo says while moving her hand over the spot. "I think it's cute." Her cheeks color at her comment, and I can't hold back the grin that spreads across my face. "Do you know what time it is?"

I shake my head. "No, but I'll go get my phone." I move past her and grab the track pants I wore yesterday evening and put them on before grabbing my phone from my bedside table. I then walk out of my room. Jo isn't in the hallway anymore, and at the end, I already see the light of the Christmas tree shining through the glass of the doors.

"It's almost seven-thirty," I tell her while walking into the living room. She's sitting on the couch with Daisy laying in front of her, and she's just changing her diaper.

"Okay," he soft voice answers, and I instantly detect the shift in her mood. Moments ago she was playful and happy, and now she's the complete opposite.

I join her in the sitting area, taking place on the coffee table so she has room to finish up with Daisy but I'm still sitting next to her. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she answers too quickly and without looking at me. She feels my eyes on her though, because before I have time to ask her what's wrong again, she decides to be honest. "It's almost time to go."

And just like that, I know what her shift is all about. How the hell did I not get that from the start?

"It'll be okay," I reassure her for what feels like the hundredth time. I don't know what else to tell her. If I tell her it will be a son of a bitch -which is most likely how it will be the first few times- I'm pretty sure she won't go. I've come to know her in these past days, and if there is anything she won't do anymore, it's doing something she doesn't want to. And I respect that. Fucking hell, I encourage that. But I really want her to go to therapy because I know that it'll eventually help her. It has to help her.

"I hope so." She's still busy with Daisy's diaper, but she sounds vulnerable and unsure. It amazes me how she has so many sides to be honest.

"Hey." I nudge her shoulder with mine, deciding to change the subject and take her mind off things. "Do I need a masterclass for that? Because I've never in my life changed a nappy before."

Her expression relaxes which tells me I've succeeded in pulling her thoughts away from what's about to come. She even giggles softly while she shakes her head, her skilled hands closing the clean nappy around Daisy's hips as if it's nothing. "It's not that hard. You'll manage."

"You'll manage," she said. Jesus fucking Christ.

I'm literally home for five minutes, and I'm already fucking sure that this is harder than Jo has led me to believe. I have to admit, when I saw her change Dais' nappy, it didn't look that hard. But now I'm slightly panicking.

After we arrived at the facility just fifteen minutes from here, Jo first hesitated to even get out of mum's car. Eventually, after a lot of pep talk, she got out, but then it took another five minutes of convincing before she walked away.

I'd offered to go in with her, but she stated that Daisy needed me more. I know she didn't mean that, and to be honest, Daisy couldn't care less since she slept, but I figured that she wanted to take that step alone.

So, I pulled her in my arms and I didn't let go until she pulled back. I kissed her forehead and whispered more encouragements, which she received without answering. And then she gave me a small smile before she turned around and walked to the entrance. She didn't look back, and I have felt nervous ever since.

The ride home went as well as possible. Daisy slept like she always does and before I knew it, I was home.

And when I was back upstairs and took Daisy out of her car seat, the shit -quite literally- began. Because Daisy had pooped during the ride back, and it's everywhere.

Daisy's laying on the couch right now, because I initially didn't even notice her whole outfit was filthy too. I very confidently opened her romper, even smiling at her that she was such a good girl, and then I found a disaster.

Seriously, it reaches till up in her neck.

And now I'm holding her legs in the air while I'm thinking about my next move. And Daisy, sweet, cute Daisy, is just looking at me. Her big blue eyes never leave my face while she sucks on her two fingers, and I swear she's mocking me.

"You made a real mess, Dais," I tell her while going over my options. I can try to fix this mess with just wipes, but I can already tell that's not a good idea. I don't even know how to move her romper over her head without getting everything in her hair. I don't think it's possible not to get it in her hair.

"Okay, Dais, you're gonna have to help me," I tell her before pulling her up and holding her against my chest. And immediately I realize what a wrong move that is because now my hands are in a shit position. Literally.

I walk to the room at the far end of the hall, catching myself on how I'm calling it Daisy's room in my head because Jo's slept in my room for two nights now and I'm hoping that we can continue that sleeping arrangement.

In the room, I lay Daisy on the changing mat on top of the dresser, and while I'm holding her with one hand, I rummage through the cabinet with the other to search for clothes. After a good minute, I find a black Addidas tracksuit that I've never seen her wear before, and since I'm wearing the same trackies as we speak, I decide that we have a winner.

I also take a clean nappy and a clean romper that she can wear underneath, and lay them on the dresser so I have them within reach. Then, I take Daisy off the changing mat and bring her to the bathroom.

"Okay, love. We're gonna have a shower." I sound confident, my voice a little higher because I'm talking to Dias, but I'm bricking it. I have no idea if I can do this alone, but little Dais is not leaving me any choice.

First, I take three towels from the shelf and lay them on top of each other in the walk-in shower on the ground. It's taking me some time since I'm doing it with one hand, but eventually, I manage to make a little soft mat where Daisy can lay on. Then, I turn on the shower so it can heat up while I put my attention on undressing Daisy.

I walk back to her room, lay her back on the changing mat, and start the challenge. Like I expected, her hair doesn't stay clean when I pull her romper over her head. "God, Dais. I had no idea you could do this."

Daisy isn't impressed; she is just looking at me while I maneuver her from left to right to get off her clothes. She is not sucking on her fingers anymore, but she is following me with her eyes intently. It's remarkable really; she is focussing so hard that she sometimes looks a little squint.

When I've got her out of her clothes and dirty nappy, I wipe her clean as best as possible using wipes. This is when she starts to cry, no doubt because it's cold, and it's making me nervous as fuck.

"It's okay, love," I mumble while holding her against me and sprinting to the bathroom. "I'll get you warm."

Once in the bathroom, I waste no time and kneel so I can lay Daisy on the towels. They are wet and warm now, since the stream was pointing at them, and the moment her back hits the warm, soft material, her cries slowly disappear.

"There you go, that's nice isn't it?" I smile while moving my hand over her head, ignoring how I'm soaking my trackies and shirt. And hair. "We'll get you clean."

Daisy sobs, but she seems to enjoy the warm water. I'm endeared. My chest swells as I look at this tiny girl. This tiny girl that's looking at me curiously, and who is trusting me completely. She is making me weak. She's so small and has no idea about the world around her, yet she's stolen my heart.

"I love you, Dais," I mumble while rubbing soup over her skin. I know she doesn't understand, but I want to tell her anyway. I'll tell her every day, so she eventually understands how loved she is, even though she would never understand how deep that love goes or how big it is.

I take her feet in my hands, rubbing the soap in between her tiny toes and on her soles, and in reaction, she seems to squirm. "Are you ticklish, little one?" I chuckle. "Just like your mummy."

I grin at the realization that I just discovered Jo's ticklish side this morning. I love how I get to know both of them a bit better with each passing minute. It makes them mine a little more every time.

When she's clean, I towel dry her and put on her clothes. She cries as always, and since I've never changed her clothes it takes me way longer than when Jo does it, but eventually, she's looking sharp in her tracksuit.

When we're done, I go back to the living room. While walking through the hall, I already feel Daisy nestle herself against my chest, which tells me the shower has made her tired.

I first get myself a coffee before I hop onto the couch, making myself comfortable while I settle Daisy across my chest. She seems happy with that because she gets into her position before I feel her sigh, and just a few minutes later her eyes are closed.

I drink my coffee while enjoying this little moment between us. A moment that before Dais, I never expected to enjoy as much as I'm doing now. I never expected to enjoy it this soon either.

I've always wanted kids. I was excited to have kids. I am excited to have kids. But obviously, my life wasn't even near the stability in which you'd choose for that.

I'd envisioned it would happen in five to ten years. After I'd met someone that would match with me. After I'd fall in love and got to know her through and through. After we'd been living together for at least two years to explore each other even better. And then eventually, we would have a baby. Because we felt we were ready to have another human being in our union. A tiny human being, created out of love.

And here I am, in a situation that doesn't even come close to what I envisioned.

And yet, I wouldn't want it any other way. Jo and I know each other for just days, but it doesn't feel like that. Daisy came into my life the moment hers started, but it feels as if I share something with her that goes way back. They are living here for a few days now, but it feels as if they've always been here.

And Daisy isn't mine, but I can't imagine that it would feel any different if she was my blood. I'd love her the same as I do now, I know I would. This would still be our thing, and I'd still do anything for her, just like I'd do now.

I'm sailing a completely different course than I expected or envisioned, but it feels right. As if it's supposed to be just like this. It makes sense.

I lean down and kiss Daisy's hair. They smell like my soap because I used it instead of the baby one that's on the shelf in the shower as well. I don't think it's good to use it on her, but one time probably won't do any harm. Besides, I like that she smells like me; it somehow makes her a little more mine.

"I've got you, Dais. Don't worry." I nuzzle my nose through her soft hairs, my hand on her back following the soothing movements of her breathing. "I'll always be there for you. I love you."

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