I feel so blessed to have him in my life. Everything seems so surreal. Like, I never thought that the person I hate the most would be my redemption; would become my everything. I took a shower and walked out and saw no one. I sighed and wore my clothes.

I sat on the bed and looked at my wedding ring. I smiled sadly looking at it. A lot has happened ever since our marriage, Christian broke me and then fixed me and when we are about to start our lives anew, I was truly defiled and then again he devoted his life to make me feel pure and he was successful in it, he gave me a life no one could. He made me feel loved, protected, safe and pure. I feel so secure in his arms, I feel so loved. Ah, how I used to hate his touch, his presence and now the same presence give me serenity. These feelings are filling my heart. I feel so complete, I have everything in my life, I don't want anything but him. He is my salvation, he evokes such affectionate emotions in me that I feel so connected to him.

Now, he gave me every happiness, I also want to liberate him from his fears. I want to make him the happiest man alive as he made me the happiest woman alive. He had suffered enough, I want to be his redemption, I want to give him the love he died to receive. I don't want him to be sad anymore.

I was swinging my legs and humming to myself. Then Christian entered our hotel room looking all too serious, I looked at him, his gaze met mine, his eyes flickered with intense grief, my smile faded, he kept giving me a begging look to not ask anything but I have no intentions of leaving him in this condition, it seemed like he could cry anytime. I stood up and rushed to him.

"Christian... what happened?" I asked softly, putting my hand over his shoulder. He closed his eyes and removed my hands and went to the bathroom without saying a thing.

"Christian..." I called him from outside.

"Are you alright?" I asked again but no reply came. I asked again,

"Christian, answer me. Are you okay?"

"Yea... I am fine!" His reply came, his voice was hoarse. I opened my mouth to ask something but I heard the sound of the shower. I sighed and again sat on the sofa waiting patiently for him to come out.

When he came out, he smiled at me as if nothing happened,

"You okay?" I asked. He laughed off and sat beside me.

"Yeah. Why?" He asked, being so ignorant of the reason. I moved to him and held his arms,

"Christian... don't you think you shouldn't hide your feelings from me?" I asked looking at him. His smile faded as he looked at me. He averted his gaze from mine and spoke,

"Look, Sophie, we are on our honeymoon and you are so happy, I don't want to ruin your happiness. Forget about it."

"My happiness lies with you. Tell me, what happened?" I asked, giving his arm a gentle squeeze. He gulped and looked at me.

"It's nothing. Don't worry. I am fine." He gave me a smile which was not convincing at all. He stood up and gave me his usual bright smile,

"Come, let go out." I frowned and stood up.

"We are not going anywhere not until you tell me what's wrong." I sternly said. He looked at me for a while and sighed. He held my shoulders and made me sit on the sofa. He bent to his knees and grit his teeth looking down as his whole being was filled with sorrow which was unbearable for him. But not just sadness but some kind of fear too. I cupped his cheek and made him look at me,

"Christian... I am here for you and always will. Please don't hide your feelings from me. You saved me and I want to save you now. So, please, don't try to push yourself away from me. I am here." I said in a faint but firm tone to give him reassurance. He held my hands and looked down again.

"You promised me that you'll stay with me forever, don't you?" He asked again in that broken tone that made my heart to be torn into pieces.

"Yes. I will never leave you." His lips began to tremble as he couldn't speak another word. I pulled him in my embrace as he put his head on my laps,

"Christian.. please don't be like that..." I pleaded with him in a whisper. If I see him like this any longer, I'll break. I couldn't even see him like that, I am amazed at how he consoles me in my suffering without managing to show how much he is hurting to see me like that.

"I am scared.." He whispered, his grip on my dress tightened, ".. please don't leave me.." He completed his sentence as a tear rolled down his cheek. My heart skipped a beat in dread, why did he think of something like this? I can never leave the love of my life. I stroke his head sweetly and whispered back,

"I will never leave you."

He moved is head to me and said desperately,

"Promise me, Sophie, no matter what happens, no matter what I'll tell you, you'll stay by my side. Sophie, I love you so much, I'll die without you.." Tears streamed down from his face, I also get down and bend on my knees and hugged him tightly, he began to cry as I rubbed his back,

"I promise, I will stay with you to the bitter end," I promised. I was swallowing hard continuously to prevent myself from crying because if I break, he will too and I don't want it.

Christian slightly pulled away, I wiped his tears and kissed his forehead. He looked down and spoke with his trembling lips,

"I have lost everything... I can't lose you too.." I smiled and pointed at his heart,

"No matter how far we are, I will always be with you; right here. My heart is with you. Just like...." I held his hand and put it over my chest,

"Your heart is with me." I smiled widely, He looked at me for a second and sniffed. He smiled faintly and stood up. "Now, don't think about it anymore," I said. He smiled and nodded. He opened his mouth again but closed it, I whined and stood up,

"Christian! I told you not to hide your feelings!" I scolded him. He laughed a little and put his hands in the air.

"Yeah. I got it. I wasn't going to say anything in the first place." I sighed as he held my hands. I smiled and looked down.

"Thank you.. for coming into my life," I said lowering my gaze. He held my chin and said,

"Thank you.. for being mine." I blushed as we went.

****

We were about to leave back to New York but then I saw the news on the television.

"The famous fashion designer; Merlin Florence has been arrested for selling her models to her clients illegally."

My eyes widened as I turned my head to Christian who seemed unaffected by this.

"You did this, don't you?" My voice came out vague but he heard it. I instantly regret asking him something absurd. How can I think like this? He can never do this but I have heard his conversation with Henley about hurting Merlin.

He seemed shocked for a moment but soon regained his posture and sighed. "She deserved it." A gasp escaped my lips as I felt disheartened. I didn't expect him to do this.

"How could you do it?" I whispered sadly. He gave me a bored look and spoke nonchalantly,

"Leave out of this Sophie. She is the one who started everything."

"That doesn't give you the reason to degrade her." He spared a glance at me as a smirk appeared on his lips. I was taken aback, don't be the ruthless Christian. He scares me. he stood up, "Come on, We're leaving."

"No. I want to know! Why did you do this!? This news has destroyed her career."

"She should be grateful that I just exterminated her career... for now." I just can't believe him. How could he do it? I walked towards him and gave him a pleading look,

"Christian.. please don't be blinded in vengeance... You can't destroy her life just because she cheated." I tried to make him understand. This act of his caused the destruction of her career she spent years to build. I feel bad for her, Christian doesn't have any rights to do this.

"If it was about me, I wouldn't even dare to lay a finger on her." He hissed. My eyes widened in disbelief as I asked hesitantly,

"Then.. what .. she did?" He looked at him with his dark gaze burning in the desire to make her suffer and give her a life worse than death, my body stiff as I shivered looking at his lethal gaze.

"She spoils the pure soul of my wife." He said as venom laced in his every word. I lost my strength as I fell on the ground. I put my hand over my mouth, panting heavily. My lips began to quiver as I looked at Christian who bent to my level.

"Why..?" I whispered in a croaked voice. Christian stared at my devastated form for a second and tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear and kissed my forehead.

"When we will go home. I'll introduce you to your own self. I will tell you the truth hidden from you for the 22 years of your life." I bit my lips and I looked down. My heart skipped a beat in dread as I curled my hands in a fist and after taking some deep breaths, I stood up.

"Okay," I said firmly as we left for home.

On our way back, my heart was beating so fast in fear. I felt so scared. As if something bad is going to happen. I received a very unsavoury omen about what's going to happen. I held Christian's hand in a tight grip.

"It is bad?" I asked, afraid...

"Depends on you." He said not meeting my gaze. My breath became heavy as I didn't dare to ask anything else.

On the other hand, Merlin, how could she do this to me? Why? What wrong I did to her that she fell this low to make me feel defiled? Why?

***

My legs were trembling, my heart; it feels like it can burst from dread. The feeling of being powerless inside of me. Not being able to say something, my dried lips choose to remain silent. Lost in apparitions that I might not know something that can be unbearable for me. All I Could do is to be strong enough to bear the pain and don't let it affect my mind but it seems impossible. I could feel it under my fingernails, the crumbling sensation.

I have already made up my mind, after knowing everything, before breaking or taking out my agony. I will meet everyone who hides this from me.

Christian is taking me somewhere, the drive was silent and after a long time, I found this silence crushing.

We reached a graveyard, Christian walked out so did I. I timidly stood beside him. He turned to me, he seemed scared. He gulped and pulled me in a hug. I stood still and I felt like he was hugging me as if it's his last time. I slowly hugged him back and called him,

"Christian.."

"Sophie... You promised to stay with me.." He said desperately. My heart clenched as I whispered,

"I will... don't worry.." I pulled away and smiled at him. Before I could say anything he pulled me into a kiss. His demeanour is now startling me a bit. Why is he acting as if we are meeting for the last time? Even tears are present on the corner of his eyes. He kissed me passionately and pulled away. He was out of breath, he gave me a look filled with intense sorrows. Looking at him like that is making me so sad. It's so heartbreaking. Please, don't do it.

He held my hand in a firm grip as we walked inside,

"I am taking you to my mother's grave." He said. I nodded as my lips formed a thin line.

My eyes widened in horror as gasps filled with shock left my lips. My whole being stiffed as my mind was clouded with unfathomable clouds of overwhelming pressure. I was deluged in the frights and ravage. Lost in the depths of despair, I remained motionless as I read the gravestone;

Eleanor Elvis

17th Oct 1968 - 12th Feb 2015

May Your Soul Rest in Peace

Aunt Eleanor... I swallowed hard as I ran my hands in my hair, trying to contain the bursting emotions inside me and not create a scene here or even kill Christian with my own hands.

"Take me home." My voice is barely audible. Christian wrapped his arms around my shoulder as we walked out. I was lost in those mystifying clouds that are beyond my capabilities to bear. I didn't dare to speak a word as we went home, controlling my anger and devastation.

The moment we entered, I finally burst those floods of emotions that were building inside of me.

"Eleanor Elvis!? I never knew her last name was Elvis and Aunt how could she... How could she kill her own self, just what the hell happened to her?! Why did she take her own life?! It's been years since I met her but her being dead is something I never imagined and moreover a suicide!? FUCKING SUICIDE!?

A knight will descend for you. That knight is you. Of all people; you. Christian how could you... You made our marriage a show of sexual intercourse, if you came to my house saying that you are the knight Aunt spoke of, that you are her son, I would have gladly accepted you- no strings attached, I would offer my life to you because I have loved you all my life without seeing or even knowing you. Even though you are my cousin but still... I had no objections to our marriage because I trusted you, you are Aunt's son. MY KNIGHT! MADE FOR ME!

When you knew that why didn't you come to me in the first place!? Why did you choose Merlin over me!? Every second Aunt talked about you. My son will come for you. You will be my bride, he will give you all the happiness. You are supposed to be mine, I was supposed to be your bride, all yours. You could have chosen me over everyone! Aunt decided it all then why did you twist fate and settle with Merlin!?"

Why didn't you come for me? I grew up, thinking whether one day, even you or Aunt might come back saying let's take you back and soon I forget all about these but you came, but how you came.

Please me whenever wherever I want.

Christian why the hell did you use me like this!? You loved Merlin, used me for your pleasures! You're supposed to protect me and you're the first fucking person ever to DEFILE ME! What wrong did I do to you!? Why didn't you fulfill your promise and protect me like you are supposed to? Why did you leave us behind? Why do you come back after all these years, Huh? Oh, yeah, I lost one but I still have another option: let's try to love her. Isn't it? TELL ME EVERYTHING DAMN IT! I WANT TO KNOW!" I burst my feelings. Tears stream down, mixed with my fierce anger and the atmosphere of his penitence spread in the air but I am beyond furious right now.

"Aunt, If that's the knight you spoke of, then I am very disappointed in him. He couldn't protect me. I hate him! I wish Aunt never gave me the hopes of him! I hate him! I hate him! I hate him! I wish I never had you as my knight." I cried loudly, letting out the agony. I felt my world crash, Christian is Aunt Eleanor's child, he.. was supposed to be my knight.. someone made for and me only.. how could he...

I sniffed and wiped my tears, he was looking down in shame as if he was at the loss of words, I walked to him and held his collar,

"But do you know what Christian? I might hate that knight and I will never forgive him. Heck, I don't even want him in my life because I don't need him." I snarled. His eyes widened in horror, Tears brimmed in his eyes, he shook his head, begging me with his eyes, utterly shattered upon hearing my words, his world of delusion came to a crash."Please don't Sophie. I love you. I can't live without you. You promised to stay. Please. I am nothing without you. Please don't leave me. I will do whatever you want just don't leave me. I love you." He began to cry out loud, pleading with me to not leave him in the dark anymore and I know I can't. My grip on his collar tightened as I lowered my head, gritting my teeth, hearing the sound of his pleas which broke my heart. A tear fell from my eye as continued,

"I hate the Knight... but.. but..I love my husband to whom I marry to escape my desperation, the one I married just for lust. The one who both defiled and purged me. I love so much that the thought of leaving him causes my very soul to immerse in dread. I will love him till my last breath and he is far better than fake knight that was supposed to protect me. My husband, who saves me from that dark abyss, who introduce me to my own self. Who was there for me every time? Please.. never try to become the knight Aunt spoke of.. please be who you are.. my husband... My Christian... Please... I love you the way you are. I love our Toxic Marriage rather than fake Knight fantasies." I put my head on his chest as silent tears rolled down my cheeks. He remained stoic as if he didn't expect me to say this. That's why he was afraid, he thought that if I ever found out that he was the one that was supposed to be mine and compared to what he did to me when we got married, I would never forgive him for this. He was supposed to be mine, he was supposed to protect me not defile me. He was scared because he knows that he failed his duty.. as my knight and not just duty but the promise he made to Aunt, he broke all of it, he was terrified so that I might not leave him because of this. That's why he kept saying that I'll leave him and please don't leave me. For a moment, I even want to run away from him, he can't even fulfil one duty. Even after trying to twist fate, he still ended up with me.

But, I can't leave him. I love him as my husband, not as some knight who was mine. I love him as my husband who gave me all the happiness of the world. The one, who made me feel so secure in his arms. The person, whose warmth gave me heavenly serenity. I love him. I love my husband. I love him dearly...

I wiped my tears and pulled away and looked at him with my teary gaze,

"Please tell me everything Christian.," I spoke faintly. Christian took a deep breath and nodded. He took a seat as I sat beside him,

"This all started when your mother was 5 months pregnant.."