No human students. No including a keylogger in this document or making entries undeletable from this document.

No packing any of the following into artillery shells: surprisingly durable chainsaws, chainsaws in general, lube, anything living or recently deceased, freeze-dried pinecones, fart gas, the blood of any species, surprisingly durable though unfortunately non-functioning organs of any kind, or anything which, while technically not illegal or at the time against these rules, would have you put in front of a war crime tribunal were it actually used in warfare. No touching artillery shells at all unless you have a really good reason. "A really good reason" and other such similar statements, at the very least when applied to this document, means a good reason according to the relevant department head, not you. If you have to wonder whether or not it's against the rules, it either is or soon will be. Don't. If you don't have to wonder as such because you can conclude that it is or such an action will cause an update to these rules, don't do it. Do not make doors require they be sung at before they can be opened. No posting this list to social media in order to get help finding loopholes. If it’s bad you shouldn’t do it. If the word loophole crosses your mind at any time while reading this list, you are to inform the relevant department head of said loophole, not use it. The same applies to any synonym thereof. No using orbital cannons to toast bread. No using anything except a toaster to toast bread. No using anything except a toaster with no modifications made, designed, or suggested by humans, to toast bread. [Scrubbed from records by order of Union Military Intelligence. See file theHorror553876 for heavily redacted details.] Don't do anything which causes several new government agencies to exist simply to deal with the implications of it being a thing. [Scrubbed from records by order of UMI. No details available.] [Scrubbed from records by order of UMI. No details available.] [Scrubbed from records by order of UMI. No details available.] Don't do anything even vaguely related to the above. Rule 0, is not "Ignore the following if the idea seems cool." There is no rule 0 on this document, nor a rule x with x being null, a decimal, integer less than 1, fraction, irrational number, imaginary number, letter, or any symbol or combination of symbols besides integers greater than 0. No detaching and throwing your own limb at somebody. Could you please stop making other students nervous over rumors about this "Project Reality Diner" and a supposed anti-human conspiracy. The xenophobia-fueled attacks are unfortunate, but they don't need a conspiracy to happen, you lot are scary. No cancer guns. Nor guns that shoot blobs of cancer. Nor guns that are cancerous. No guns which are in any way diseased. Yes, the university does reside in the territory of a nation. Yes, other nations might go to war with such nation. If people attack the university, you have to take prisoners in an ethical manner, not use the event as an excuse to test some of your more exotic weaponry. No experimentally driving prisoners insane. No experimenting on prisoners. Apparently, this one needs to be restated, but this time including prisoners of war. No experimenting on terrorists. No converting massive sections of the university into pulsating flesh. Hallways should be comprised of neither tongues nor teeth. Same for doors and flagpoles. No using finely-tuned orbital laser platforms to make fruit salad. No creating currencies backed by liters of tears. Nor liters of blood, or any other bodily fluid. No using orbital lasers to assist in surgery. No using orbital lasers to warm your coffee. No using highly elaborate setups to convince someone that they've been shrunk to 1/8th scale. If it causes psychological trauma, No. Any human rule 34 is a psychological weapon when used against non-humans. No using orbital lasers to evaporate raindrops before they hit you. Fine, if someone attacks this place despite it being one of the most heavily armed places known to exist (when did that happen), you can do with them as you wish. No throwing anyone else's limb at anyone. Yes, the blue psuedo-gas is mysterious. Yes, it may very well lead to grand scientific progress. However, despite that, if using completely excessive amounts of explosives against it didn't cause any reaction other than obliterating the moon the experiment was taking place on, doing so again won't get different results. Yes, large sample size is one of the bases of science, but it didn't work the first five times, and it won't work the sixth. It is not a valid excuse to set off 'fireworks,' antimatter-based or not. Just because you figured out that you have to keep it in constant motion in order to contain it doesn't mean that a lot more motion is the answer to getting it to do anything. Repeat after me, explosives do not solve everything.