What does it mean to be human? Is there nothing to it at all, is it just flesh and bone, bruises and blood, err and err. Do we lie to ourselves to pass the hours or are we honestly just confused? Is the babe the vengeful killer or is the killer a man's mistakes? I am listening, I am asking. Yesterday was beautiful, today I'll try to forget, tomorrow lets not wake up. The questions were before I was. Do you ever answer? How many listen? Yesterday made me smile, today I dried some tears, tomorrow I'll close my eyes. After all yesterday's wounds are forgotten, today's wounds are fresh, tomorrow I'll cry over new wounds.

Tears wept

The spider came at Kael so swiftly and silently it seemed more like a wind blown leaf dancing across the cold hard cave floor than a many legged beast.

Kael's mind raced, taking in the spider's bladed limbs and judging their length. It would impale him before he could get close enough to use a claw and even if he did manage to get past them he would inflict little more than superficial damage. The spider was thin and slender, meant for ambushes and easy kills rather than overpowering prey, still its chitinous exoskeleton promised to rebuff his blows.

"I need something with more reach... the club!"

Kael turned his neck and stretched out his hand, yelling.

"Kip! Give me the club!"

He soon realised it was a mistake. Despite being some distance off the spider lashed out with one of its bladed limbs. The leg blurred, extending to its full length. Kael jerked instinctively, spotting the motion from the corner of his eye, and a avoiding a fatal wound but not avoiding injury altogether. The leg sliced off a portion of his left ear cleanly, the peice went flying, trailed by a thin arc of blood.

Pain spiked through his head, intense for a moment but quickly becoming dull and distant. Startled Kael backpedaled furiously, his breathing heavy and rapid. Thankfully Gerald and the others had distanced the themselves from him as soon as the threat was confirmed. Eye's wide and fearful Kael kept his focus on the spider.

"KIP! CLUB!"

It was coming again and Kael wasn't sure how he would stop it, its leg had gone through his ear like it wasn't there and he didn't think the rest of him would fare much better. The spider run up the tunnel wall without slowing its charge until it was dashing across the ceiling. It leapt at him from above, intent on using the odd angle to its favour.

Wham! His fist struck the spider in the mandibles, knocking it backwards. There was a second flash of pain from the arm he struck with, the impact had forced his claws into his palm. Kael berated himself internally, punching was an old habit drilled into him by numerous instructors but he would need to make an effort to stop it or wind up injuring himself badly.

The spider hit the ground on it's feet and without wasting a second charged Kael again.

"Shit shit shit. I need to use to use the ooze but if it fails I'm fucked!"

"The fuck mate!" Kip yelled behind him, "You stabbed me with your tail. Ow ow ow fucking quit it!"

In his fervour the newly formed appendage had been swinging wildly behind him unbeknownst to him.

"My tail! Reach!"

Kael thrust with his tail, it struck the spider beneath the eye he was aiming for but the bone point slid of the creature's carpace and peirced another of it's multiple eyes, drawing dull green blood from it.

The arachnid ignored the wound and took a swipe at Kael. He tried a leap backward but the force from his tense leg muscles had him hitting the tunnel ceiling head first. Dammit! His calves had been altered to allow explosive jumps, an ability the voth used to close distance between their targets and jump up tall structures like the legde that trapped him even whilst they were weighted down by game. What could have been a small jump backwards became a powerful vault as his inexperience with his new body functions caused him to mess up under pressure.

Luckily the powerful leap had suprised the spider and it scuttled backwards. Kael scrambled to his feet slowed by the unfamiliar length of his limbs, some movements seemed to come naturally but others felt strange and awkward.

"Come on, come on, just work dammit!"

"Kip give me the damned club!"

"Your tail-"

"Give it!" Even as he yelled at Kip, he struck with his tail, a feint meant to buy time for Kip to hand him the club. Kael aimed a series of attack at the spider which it deftly defended against with its forelimbs. Again and again Kael tried to wound it with his tail but it paried each strike with increasing confidence, its many legs working in concert to manoeuver it out of harm's way. Kael felt helpless before it, how could it react so quickly and easily?! All he needed to do was buy some time and everything would change. Vigorously thrusting and slashing he managed to keep the spider back whilst he claimed the large stick from a wary Kip. Relief flooded him the moment he had a solid grip on the large stick and he almost dropped it.

Mentally he tried to push aside all thoughts of exhaustion and tried to focus on his anger and fear. Without fanfare he brought the club down heavily on the spider with an overhead strike. Bam! The spider warded the blow with its bladed limbs raised in an 'x'. Undettered Kael hammered down a barrage of blows, internally screaming die, die, die, die, die! The tides had turned and he was enjoying the feeling of dominating the beast but more than that he wanted to shed it's blood!

Lost in the rush of the moment Kael let loose the tentacle he had been saving for emergencies. Shunk! Ooze rushed from his exposed belly and hit the defensively crossed limbs. Weakened by his hammering, the limbs where pushed aside and tentacle buried itself deeply in the creatures body. Crushing chitin and organs alike, it left the spider looking like someone had tried to cut it in two with a mace.

The fight was over, Kael savoured the sweet feeling of victory. The sharp scent of the spider's blood promised improvements. Kael could hardly wait, he wanted to drain the beast till it was brittle from lack of moisture and so he did. He rushed to the spider's twitching body and manisfested the white tendrils with the last of his despair.

Pleasures hit him in waves of pure ecstasy, the weariness in his muscles began to fade and the presence of the ooze returned to his mind. He could restore despair from the things he drained! Kael wasn't thinking about that though he lay on the cave floor shivering, his mind elsewhere.

"Ya done mate?... MATE! Quit scaring us are ya done?"

The sound brought Kael back to himself. What was that? Kael turned to face the owner of the voice, it was the scent of them that drove him wild. Their bodies sweaty from unspent adrenaline and fear, worsened by the poorly aired tunnel. He could smell their fear, he could hear their steady breathing, the sound of their hearts beating. He wanted to slam his club on their skulls. He could almost hear the crunch their heads would make, the smell of their blood in the air not as heavy with improvements as the spider's but fresh and rich, much sweeter than the spiders acrid ichor. In that moment he could think of no reason not to take their blood as well.

He could handle them too, an explosive jumb and head bash would kill Gerald. Then the rest would have no chance. He wouldn't get much in the way of benefits, not even from Gerald, Rufus had proven that contrary to popular belief physical war path deviants were evokers primarily with only moderate traces of augmentation but the thrill of killing them would be worth it besides he needed more mass to form more bodies, so he could kill in new ways, taste and feel the same pleasures in different forms and oh the pleasures.

"Kael are you hurt?"

The ridiculous question caught Kael by suprise, what did it matter if he was hurt he was going to kill them all and no injury he had sustained today would prevent that.

"Did you hear anything we just said?"

Gerald placed a concerned hand on Kaels shoulder and Kael saw his chance to kill him quickly, but before he could act Bloke bowled over hurriedly and started to puke. The scent of putrid mushrooms made Kael's stomach churn and he was assailed by a wave of nausea. Oh gods he felt sick. Kneeling down he bent over and retched but nothing would come out.

"Kael?"

"Mate?"

"Oh gods, Gerald get him away from me"

"Bloke take it elsewhere the smell of mushrooms makes him sick!"

Kael got back on his feet with watery eyes.

"You guys carry the carcass back. I need to think." He was done with it anyways.

"Ya alright mate?"

Kael didn't answer, Kip's repetitive vocabulary was the least of his concerns.

"What in the corrupted zones just happened?"

No reply, nothing.

"Hey you in there I'm talking to you."

"Then you would have done well to say so."

"Just tell me what happened. I wanted to kill them! Why would I want to kill them?"

"Do you remember the leading theory concerning the effects of despair on our observable reality?"

"Words words words?"

"It was discovered centuries ago shortly after the formation of the circle of... the circle of... I can't seem to recall the name of the order, I can't even remember its purpose..."

"Do we need that? You know to understand all this stuff?"

"Well I suppose not, the order discovered that the world could be divided into two realities. The reality most beings are first aware of, accordingly named the observable reality and the reality most fail to become aware of the unobserved reality referred to by some as the world behind the veil. Are you with me so far?"

"Yes but I don't see how it relates to me!"

"It relates to all things, you only need to know to understand how. All things are first formed in the unobserved reality but not all things that take form there do so in the observable reality. The order named all things present in the unobserved reality anima..."

Kael decided it was time to head back, nothing would make Fragment cut to the chase once he started a lecture and he would hate to get surrounded by a pack of spiders. Their plan had been a stupid one dependent on too many variables beyond their control but he supposed that was the mark of desperation. Now though he no longer needed to stay here, not to mention the others risked getting lost without him or perhaps ambushed. He only hoped Fragment would eventually say something that could help him.

Kael led the rest of the team down the tunnel, behind him the others held on to his outstretched tail allowing them to move faster through the gloom. Above their heads was spider's carcass which they carried with their free hands, they were firmly in voth territory now and only a little way of from the mushroom farms and other human beings.

"If current belief holds true this would explain why deviations as you are wont to call them manifest predominantly in three forms..."

Fragment on the other hand seemed no closer to finishing than when he first started. Kael supposed if his life wasn't in danger he would have found it riveting whether true or false but as it were, he was a step away from telling Fragment to put a sock in it out of frustration only the fear of having to start again had prevented that. The walk had brought Kael to a grim realization, if he lost himself to bloodlust again outside the tunnels it was likely that Gerald would kill him, never mind his odds at surviving if he did kill Gerald or his chances at finding a human settlement without the others.

"As you are aware certain things are manifest in unobserved world that are not observable here. It was proven that this occurs when the an anima lacks sufficient energy to create an observable manifestation of itself. In this manner some anima possess observable manifestations that are in fact only a portion of the anima themselves, not complete copies. We refer to these as partial manifestations, partial manifestations make up the greater part of the observable reality and full manifestations are few and far between."

The only upside to Fragment's droning was that it made Kip seem soothing by comparison, the large man had gone silent shortly after the fight and Kael was almost tempted to ask him whether he was alright, almost.

"As you are now you are a merely partial manifestation, steps can be taken to remedy this though. I would estimate a couple centuries worth of effort should the odds be favourable. As I said earlier on when despair 'corrupts' objects what actually occurs is that an anima comes in contact with and absorbs despair, a highly reactive energy source that causes two things to occur to varying extents; one the anima grows, changes, morphs... I cannot seem to find a suitable word in your tongue. Do you speak yggdrasil?"

"Err... no?"

"What other tongues do you speak?"

"I don't speak any other tongues..."

"..."

"Are you going to continue?"

"That would be disseminating inaccurate information"

"I would prefer that to no information."

"I suppose... Secondly the anima materializes more of itself, this is what when present in a living being you refer to as augmentations. When you temper your form or your body this second activity takes place. Your anima projects more of itself into this reality, into you. In this case this includes not only new instincts but an altered mental state in order to help hasten the materialisation. Positively speaking tempering should take less time than originally estimated, that your anima alters your mental state into a more suitable one can be considered a boon."

"That sounds like some made up crap! Why would an altered mental state improve materialising or whatever? This makes no sense!"

"I remember explaining the relationship between the mind and the twin realities"

"I don't"

"The mind is the bridge between both realities, it allows either the anima or the physical representation to affect the other."

"I thought they were the same thing-"

"They are not, a working analogy would be that an anima is a mold and the representation is the item the mold forms when filled with motlen steel, energy"

"Lets just focus on the mind part. I can affect my anima with my mental state, yes?"

"No you cannot consciously do this but with proper instruction, time, and effort it should not prove impossible."

"Then what do I do, how do I stop myself from going beast and getting myself killed?"

"I don't think you need to do anything"

"Why not?"

"From what I observed you seemed rational although strongly influenced, I don't think you would attack anything you deemed stronger than yourself perhaps even something you consider more useful alive than dead. Furthermore the sate seemed fragile a sufficient amount of shock should break it."

"I... I hope you are right."

Fragment did not deign to reply and Kael did not care for one, he had something else on his mind.

A couple of hours had passed since they returned, asking around had revealed that it was well into morning now and they were almost ready to leave all that was left were some finishing touches so the spider's legs could be used as swords, a small crowd had gathered to watch this.

Without need for words the group had come to the decision that Kael and Gerald would take a limb each, Bloke and Barnel had found themselves clubs by bullying others with Kael's name. They would have done same for those with spider blades but those who had them had either dissapeared or were protected by large gatherings.

"I think we are done mate!" Kip announced loudly, brandishing a shortened and polished spider leg.

Kael gave him a nod and beckoned for Gerald to come up to him. Immediately the boy closed enough he whipped his tail at Gerald. It struck the unsuspecting deviant across the chest and left a red bruise. Kael leapt forward using the explosive power he stole from the dead voth, with clawed arms raised intent on ripping off Gerald's face.

Fear distorted the other boy's expression for a moment but it quickly became anger. In the dark the glow of Gerald's eyes were ominous and eye-catching, all around gasps went out as the people gathered recognised them for what they were. He moved faster than Kael could follow and when Kael hit the ground he couldn't say how it happened, still he felt no pain. Something Kael knew meant his altered nerves have judged the damage to be superficial otherwise they would have have lit up upon impact and dimmed to dull aches afterwards.

When Kael looked up he saw that Gerald had picked up one of the makeshift swords and was staring down at him with a cruel smile on his too wide lips.

"You are not stupid and no matter how you may look you are no animal, so tell me why the FUCK did you do that!?"

Kael laughed and sat up feeling more daring than he had any right to be.

"Beleanor wants to kill us because I am a deviant he can't control but here's the thing I don't think he gives a fuck about killing you! So consider this me making sure you are as invested in our escape attempt as I am."

"And you thought it was smart to give away our only hidden trump for this?"

"Perhaps it just goes to show how much faith I have in you."

Gerald gave him a long hard look and then dropped the sword with a laugh saying.

"Fair enough."