Lilly was sitting at the small wooden table wearing Lucifer’s pilfered tunic, her pipe’s stem between her teeth as she stared into space above the table when Sour Puss came through the front door. She’d woken up shaking almost an hour prior in an empty house and stumbled her way out of the bedroom to find her bag where it had fallen on the floor. As soon as she’d managed to take her first hit off the pipe, she’d broken down into giggling sobs as her mind tore itself it apart, leaving her aching.

After that had been another nap on the floor, after she’d cried herself out, that had added to the stiffness in her joints. As the sun set, she’d managed to seat herself at the table with her quill and a loose sheet of parchment from the folder she carried. Once she’d finished scrawling a shaky letter, she’d used the candle on her tinderbox to burn it. She had nowhere to send it to anyway. It was just a way to focus her thoughts enough to find steady mental ground to stand on.

“You look like shit,” he said as he paused to look at her, making her chuckle mirthlessly.

“Glad to know my insides reflect my outsides for a change,” she said.

“You ok?” he asked gently as he came to sit across the table from her.

“Not really,” she said. “But I’m not in any danger of going off the deep end.”

“You sound like you’ve been gargling acid,” he pointed out. “Don’t get me wrong, I love the husky gravel in your voice, but what happened?”

“I tore my vocal cords,” she said. “It’s not the first time. Hence why I get called sir so much when I send clients messages to let them know their order is done.”

“You want me to see if I can help?” he asked and she shook her head.

“You’ll be happy to know I can cast again,” she said. “Had just enough sense when I first woke up to Prestidigitation the bloodstains leftover from me coughing out of the pillowcase.”

“You mind telling me what the fuck I witnessed the other day?” he asked, making her frown.

“How long was I out?” she asked.

“Two days,” he said seriously. “Beldor took the others back home as soon as Fuk woke up,” he explained. “Your screaming scared the piss out of them to the point where it was making Nook want to throw up and Fuk wouldn’t stop crying. She gave me your message about five minutes before it started up. Thank you, by the way,” he added, not looking her in the eye, "for giving her your lantern.”

“Where is it?” she asked and he motioned to the room beside the one she’d been sleeping in.

“You going to answer my question?” he asked.

“Why did you stay behind?” she asked.

“You first,” he said seriously. “You and I are going to be stuck here alone together for at least another day before Beldor gets back, so you might as well tell me.”

“You seriously underestimate my ability to dodge questions,” she said tiredly as she got up stiffly from the chair she’d been sitting in and went to retrieve her lantern.

It was still burning brightly on the nightstand, casting the bed in a soft, blue glow. Picking it up, she opened the glass door again, pursing her lips to inhale as she consumed the flame. Inside, its warmth went a long way to soothing the ache at her center from its absence. Without it, she was little more than a soulless, crusty shell of Abyssal energy filled with Chaos. She took a deep breath as it settled and relaxed in relief.

“There’s not much left,” she said absently. “Enough to light the lantern, though.”

“You used your soul to light the way,” Sour Puss said behind her. “How?”

“It’s not the whole thing,” she said. “There was still enough left inside me to keep me cognitive and aware of what I needed to do, but everything else was acting as your nightlight.”

“You can fracture your soul?” he asked.

“It’s already fractured,” she corrected him. “Can’t heal that kind of damage,” she added with a half-hearted shrug. “Between that and the chemical imbalance in my meat-brain that causes persistent depression and uncontrollable giggle fits when I’m feeling unstable, I’d say I’m burning trash fire in the psychological and spiritual departments,” she added in half-hearted sarcasm as she pushed past him to return her lantern to her bag and her ass to her seat.

“No wonder you keep everyone at arms-length,” he said quietly.

“You picked up on that, huh?” she asked, wincing as she sat back down.

“Beldor said you were touched by an Old One,” he said as he came back to the table as well, making her groan internally. She wasn’t in the mood for a shadow.

“Yeah, well, Beldor and I need to talk about repeating information,” she said, picking up her pipe and repacking the bowl with the last little bit of her stash before lighting it.

When she held it out to Sour Puss in offering, he shocked the shit out her by accepting it and taking a hit for himself, holding it in his lungs before letting it slowly. He winced against the taste for a few moments before coughing harshly.

“Why does it feel like my lungs are crackling and freezing at the same time?” he asked as soon as he’d caught his breath.

“These were grown in a greenhouse in Gehenna,” she explained. “The Chaos Storms roll kind of low in the area and the energy from the lightning translates along with the Abyssal cold in the air. Give it a few minutes and it should start calming the rest of your body. I tried growing in Malsheem, but the strain I got was saturated in Infernal energy and made my head buzz so much I couldn’t sit still.”

“I wonder what would happen if you grew that stuff here,” he said.

“I’ll find out as soon as I dry the herbs I harvested the night I got here,” she said.

“So,” he said after a few minutes of comfortable silence, “are you going to tell me the truth?”

“About?” she asked and he gestured at her. “Ah,” she said, looking down to realize she still hadn’t returned to her Tiefling form and her sigils were still hanging out in the breeze, thankfully blue once again. Taking her bracelet out of her pocket and putting it back on to suppress them, she pictured her Tiefling self in her mind to allow her body to follow suit. “Better?” she asked.

“Not really,” he said honestly.

“Yeah, well,” she said, shaking her head. “It’s not like you’re being very forthcoming,” she pointed out. “Unless Fuk is your adopted sister.”

“You saw her true form,” he said in understanding, leaning back in his chair a bit with a heavy breath that clued her into the fact that he realized he was busted. “I’ll change back to my true form if you do the same,” he said after a few minutes of thinking.

“You realize what you’re suggesting is the Changeling equivalent of I’ll-show-you-mine-if-you-show-me-yours, right?” she asked with a snort.

“Did you have to make it dirty?” he asked, rolling his eyes.

“Yes,” she said without hesitation. “If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be me.”

“Just for that, I retract my previous offer,” he said, crossing his legs under the table and his arms over his chest. “Wow, that stuff is strong,” he added, “I haven’t been this relaxed in a long time.”

“I figured as much,” she said. “You kinda present that stick up your ass like it’s made out of adamantine and built for beating people with.” When he raised an eyebrow at her, she chuckled. “Don’t worry, I saw all of the BDSM and sex toy innuendos I could follow that up with, too.”

“And yet you passed on them,” he pointed out. “Are you feeling alright?”

Lilly smiled in appreciation at his wit.

“Better,” she admitted. “Not good enough to get naked with you at the moment,” she clarified, “but better than I was when you first walked in.”

“Good enough to try and explain to me what I witnessed?” he asked. “When I mentioned spell slots, you looked at me like I was speaking Deep Speech,” he said when she blinked at him.

“I understand Deep Speech,” she said bluntly. “I did not, however, understand what you were talking about because I’ve never been taught by a classically trained magic-user. The closest thing I have to a magical tutor is my buddy, Uriah, and he doesn’t train me on anything. He just gives me access to his spell-books and history texts when I ask for them.”

“What class are you?” he asked.

“I claim Bard because of my sex-drive and the Jack-of-All trades thing,” she said, holding her hands up in a sustained shrug. “I have a little experience in the theater from a couple of jobs I’ve done in the past and I wrote a book once upon a time to try and earn some extra coin, but other than that,” she finished, letting the sentence hang before dropping her hands.

Sour Puss’s left eyelid twitched and she imagined the sound his brain was making as something akin to if someone had taken a drunk, angry goose and stepped on it.

“And you’re an adventurer?” he asked after a very long pause.

“I wish,” she said honestly. “No, I pretty much only leave the Nine Hells when I have a job that I can use as an excuse to get out or I go to Gehenna. If a few things work out in my favor, though, I’m going to relocate to this side of existence and use this place as my home-base while I give adventuring a try in earnest. I just have to find a party I can travel with for a bit.”

He took a long, deep breath as he looked at her appraisingly.

“I was an adventurer for a while,” he admitted. “Right now, stuff at home has kind of put that on hold and I’m not sure if I’d be willing to go back to it. But I can at least teach you the basics when it comes to managing your magic and helping you figure out what class you’re best suited for.”

“Damn,” she said with a huff.

“What?” he asked.

“If I say no, I’ll be screwing myself out knowledge I need to live like a normal person,” she said, putting her hands behind her head and looking at the ceiling. “If I agree, I’ll have to answer your questions honestly because they are directly tied to the source of my magical ability.”

“Is keeping your secret worth sacrificing your capabilities?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said. “Considering I’ve been doing that to myself since I was a kid.”

“What do you mean?” he asked with a frown.

“I live in an environment rich with aggressive telepathy users,” she said. “When I’m home, I have to shut down my thought process when I am around them to prevent even thinking about my magical capabilities and the source thereof out of self-preservation. This is the first time I have found myself in a situation where I am both being asked about it and feel safe enough to attempt doing so. Not even my lovers know the truth.”

“It’s just us,” he said. “And if you want some time to think about it, take it. The offer won’t expire. My way of thanking you for saving my sister.”

“I appreciate it,” she said, releasing a slow breath of relief at not having to choose right away. “Don’t get me wrong, Sour Puss, I’m warming up to you. Slowly.”

“No offense taken,” he said with a nod. “Is it just me, or are you kind of hungry?”

“I’ve been sleeping on an empty stomach for the last two days,” she pointed out. “You’ve just got the munchies.”

“Oh, shit,” he said with a look of sympathy, “I didn’t even think of that. I was so worried about you getting rest that I didn’t think to try waking you up to eat.”

“It’s cool,” she said. “But that’s why I’m still not running at full capacity energy-wise.”

Before she’d even finished her statement, he was up out of his chair and rummaging around in the kitchen. Part of their care package for Beldor was a full kitchen’s worth of groceries and goods for the pantry. He’d also apparently done some hunting while she was sleeping, going by the freshly butchered meats in the steel box infused with cold magic in the corner of the kitchen. Curious, Lilly got up and leaned against the counter as he worked, occasionally pulling spices from the rack beside her handing them to him to use in the hearty stew he was making.

“Venison?” she asked when she first saw the meat and he nodded. “You save the antlers?”

“They’re outside drying out,” he said. “Why?”

“What color were they?” she asked.

“White,” he said.

“I can paint them black,” she said to herself. “I figure a small show of respect to Beshaba could be good for this place after all the misfortune it’s seen.” Sour Puss looked at her strangely for a moment before shaking his head and going back to what he was doing. “What?”

“I’ve just never heard of a Dark God being spoken of in that tone,” he said.

“What, without the trembling fear and psychotic ramblings of a cultist bent on world destruction?” she asked, well aware of the zealots that were often attracted to the Dark Pantheon.

“Exactly,” he said. “You sound almost affectionate.”

“That’s because Beshaba has been a friend, same as the Traveler, for a long time,” she said.

“Why do I get the feeling you’d make a lot more sense if I knew the truth?” he asked.

“Because you’ve got good instincts,” she said simply and he shook his head again. “You want to push, don’t you?” she asked.

“I do, but I’m resisting the urge,” he said. “Barely.”

“How about this,” she suggested. “There are only certain questions that will trigger me to drop that bomb on you. Feel free to ask me anything you want and I will answer. If you figure it out on your own, I’ll confirm your conclusion to be correct.”

“Why the game?” he asked and she let out a sharp bark of laughter.

“I was asking myself the same question not long ago,” she said, shaking her head. “But, in this context, it’s because I’m not sure how much I can trust you to believe.”

“You’re not worried about me trying to exploit or take advantage of you at all?” he asked and she shook her head.

“Not much in this life does worry me, you least of all,” she said honestly.

“Why me least of all?” he asked.

“I could take the Infernal route and point out that I know your weakness,” she said bluntly. “But the truth is, I’m not pinging any warning flags off you. Yeah, you’re a hard-ass and if I wasn’t used to cuddling up to fiends for comfort, you might strike me as threatening. But, as you saw from my sigils, nothing legitimately scares me.”

“I’m not going to lie, that’s a comfort,” he admitted. “At home, the only people that seem to relax around me are my siblings,” he said and something clicked.

“Leax and Nook are your brothers,” she said and he looked at her in surprise.

“How did you?” he started to ask.

“How you acted during the combat was the first clue,” she said. “You switched places with Nook because he was injured and you could get to Anzora faster than trying to run and grab him. I’m guessing by the fact that he didn’t enter into the combat at all that he’s either close to the same age or younger than Fuk even though he presented as an adult elf. But you told Leax to cover Fuk, leaving him in melee with the hag instead of switching with her, which means he’s more experienced with defensive situations than Nook. You also knew Leax would die before he let anything happen to his little sister when he was in a position to protect her. Add to that the fact that none of them seemed even the slightest bit put off by your presence and what you just said about them being the only ones that relax around you,” she finished, waving her hand in a conclusive gesture.

“Fuck,” he said, blinking at her. “You got all of that just from the combat?”

“Combat is where I learn the most about a person,” she said. “Sparring with Bob and Uriah was how learned I could trust them enough not to hurt me even when I pushed them to their limits. Which, truthfully, is one of the only reasons I was willing to share my bed with them. And,” she added, “if my knowledge of Changeling culture is correct, I’m guessing that means Anzora lives with a Changeling Enclave, not an Elvish community.”

“Ok, that’s a leap,” he said, leveling her with a serious look.

“Yeah, but I’m right,” she said with a light smile. “The fact that your first instinct was to deflect as opposed to denying tells me so.”

“This isn’t fair,” he said.

“No, what isn’t fair is pointing out that, even though you have an undeniable amount of dominant masculine energy in your soul,” she said, “you have enough distinct feminine energy swirling around it to make me fairly certain you’ve enjoyed wearing a female shape more than a few times. No judgment,” she said quickly and honestly as he started to bristle. “I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve presented as a male and enjoyed the fuck out of it,” she said, picturing the male version of her Tiefling form with shorter blue hair and thicker, more prominent horns as her body grew about a foot taller and sixty pounds of muscle heavier. Afterward, she repositioned her long, lean form back on strong arms in a seductive pose, winking at him for good measure as she smirked.

The way he looked away and pressed his lips together as he blinked made her laugh as she returned to her female form, complete with her natural curves. By elvish or Changeling standards, she’d be considered overweight. By human standards, she was considered voluptuous. When he looked back at her, clearing his throat before busying himself with the stew on the stove behind him, she knew she’d struck a chord that he wasn’t comfortable addressing with a stranger. The burning red of his ears also made her wonder if he was blushing and didn’t want her to see.

“You mad at me?” she asked after a few moments.

“No,” he said and she believed him.

He sounded more embarrassed than angry. Chances were, not many people were privy to that part of his life. Which meant she’d accidentally stumbled upon one of his secrets. With as open as she was about herself, outside of the details of her private life, she only had one secret to offer in exchange.

“Good,” she said. “Because that would make training me rather difficult,” she added and he turned to look at her again.

“You trust me enough to tell me the truth?” he asked and she hesitated for a minute before nodding. “Ask the right questions and I’ll give you the right answers.”

“Why do you have demon sigils covering your soul?” he asked without hesitation.

“To contain the Chaos Energy that contains my essence,” she said, going back to her bag to grab her notebook and opening it to a page with her sigil drawn on it. “The lily in the center represents my essence,” she said, pointing to the five-petaled flower baring three stacked skulls in the center before moving to the chaotic scrollwork filling the space between the petals. “The Chaos Energy I’ve absorbed from the Abyss,” she said before moving outward to the solid black line encircling the scrollwork. “The sigils to keep it contained,” she said before moving outward the flames swirling in a counterclockwise direction around it. “The Infernal energy I use to purpose the chaotic energy that leaks through the barrier.”

“So, what do you cast with?” he asked with a frown.

“The leaks,” she said. “As long as I have enough Infernal magic in my system, I can purpose my magic the same way a traditional magic-user does as long as I know the spells or write one up myself. As far as spell slots are concerned, I’m not sure how many I have since the highest-level traditional spells I know how to do offhand are Shatter and Identify. If I spend enough time here in the Feywild, I could probably use Wild Magic instead of Infernal energy to temper the chaos, but I haven’t had enough of either because I burned through what I’d absorbed in the Nine Hells and essentially depleted my reserves, leaving me with causing controlled leaks in the Abyssal barrier as my only defensive option.”

“What are you?” he asked and she smiled. “How much power do you have naturally that you would need the strength of the Outer Planes of Chaos, the Abyss, and the Nine Hells to contain it enough to pass for even semi-normal?”

“I wasn’t touched by an Old One,” she said. “I am one.”