Kaho was busy after school, so Hiromasa and I hung out at my house for a while. He had to leave in the evening to help his mom out, which left me way too much alone time to wonder about Higoshi. That cold shoulder treatment really got under my skin. I'm not the warmest of people, but at least I practice common courtesy.

I sat on my bed and tried to drown out my thoughts with some TV. I could've been sitting on the couch in the living room, but I hardly ever went downstairs unless it was to get food and come back up. It felt empty and foreign down there despite it being my own house. At least my room felt like my own space.

My cellphone said it was a minute until seven. I muted the TV before the phone even rang.

"Hi, Mom," I said into the phone.

"Good evening, Kaito," she answered. "How was your day?"

"Fine. How are you and Dad doing?"

"We're well, thank you. How are your studies going?" Her voice sounded as dry and uncaring as it usually did.

"Well, it was only the first day of school, so they aren't really going at all yet."

"I see. Are you eating alright?"

"Yep," I lied.

"That's good. Well, I have to go, Kaito. I'll talk to you next week. Goodbye."

"Bye."

I barely had time to get the word out before she hung up. I pulled the phone away from my ear. It was one minute after seven.

The conversation had been the same every week for as long as I could remember. She called every Monday, always asked the same questions, and hung up after about a minute.

I used to drag the conversation out by asking where they were or what they did that day. I usually wouldn't understand much of what she told me, but I would ask anyway. I can't remember exactly when I stopped. I think I noticed at some point that it didn't matter if I asked or not, it didn't change the dry tone in which she spoke, so I stopped bothering her about it.

I never spoke to my father over the phone. It was always my mother who called. I only saw him on the rare occasions they returned home.

It didn't really matter. It used to upset me, but I had long been over that. The situation was pretty ideal for me. I got a house to myself and was free to do pretty much whatever I wanted with the money they sent me. A robotic phone call once a week seemed like a pretty fair price.

Soon after that, I grabbed my red jacket and headed out the door. Kaho wanted to meet at some burger joint. When I got there, I made my way across the red and white checkered floor, scanning the red seats until I spotted Kaho at a booth.

"Sorry," I said, sliding into the seat across from her. "Have you been waiting long?"

She shook her head. "No. I haven't been here for more than a few minutes."

"Good." I smiled.

We glanced over the menus and Kaho started to tell me about her day and what she hoped to accomplish that year. She wasn’t a defect like me. Naturally, she was going to join clubs and planned for a busy school year.

A girl with torn jeans and a black hoodie passed by the wall of windows. Her black hair trailed out the side of the hood. I barely caught the side of her face, but I was sure, just like I was that morning. It was definitely Higoshi. She turned toward the back of the building and left my sight.

"Kaho." I cut her off midsentence without evening meaning to. "Uh, sorry, but can you excuse me for a minute? I have to use the bathroom."

"Oh...sure," she answered. "What should I say if they come to take our order?"

I slid from the seat and stood up. "Just get me anything. Surprise me."

I walked through the restaurant toward the bathrooms and the front door, taking one last look towards the booth. Kaho was busy texting on her phone.

I stepped outside and scanned the area, but didn’t see Higoshi anywhere. I decided she must have gone towards the back and started following the building around. A man’s voice stopped me just before I turned the corner.

"Here,” he said. “Now take these and get out of here before I get in trouble.”

I carefully peered around the corner. A young man wearing a dirty apron leaned out of a steel door. He handed Higoshi two round objects wrapped in tinfoil. She tucked one away in the pocket of her hoodie and unwraped the other one halfway. She took a bite of the burger, then gave him a dismissive wave and started to walk off. The guy pulled the door shut.

I took out my phone and switched it to silent, then waited a few moments before following Higoshi. She walked back to the sidewalk and we become just two more people walking around the city at night.

What the hell was I even doing, following this girl around at night like a creeper? Why didn't I call out to her and why was I so intent on following her in the first place? I wasn’t really sure. I was drawn to her in an unexplainable way. Whatever my reasons were, she clearly didn’t feel the same. I really wanted to know more about her, anything she'd tell me. I didn't even care what it was. How did I, of all people, get stuck in a one sided attraction?

I followed her for quite a while. We left the crowds behind and entered dark, quiet neighborhoods.

She finally stopped with a sigh and crunched something up in her hands, then turned around and threw it. I was much too slow. It bounced off my forehead and landed on the sidewalk. Was it the burger wrapper?

"Uh...hi," I said

"What do you want?" she asked.

Good question. I wasn't really sure myself. Apparently, I'm really bad at taking hints.

"I was thinking of a career in the PSIA," I said. "I thought I would practice my skills at trailing someone."

She chuckled. "A spy, huh? Well, you need more work. Your approach sucks. I knew you were following me since the restaurant."

I rubbed the back of my head. "That obvious, huh? Thanks for the critique. I'll have to work on it. So, what are you doing out here?"

She pulled her hood down. "Just out for a moonlight stroll. I think the more important question is, what are you doing out here?"

"I just wanted to talk to you, I guess."

"So talk." She turned around and stared walking.

I hastened my step to catch up to her. I could see her better now. Did she have all those earrings and rings before?

"So, you know one of the cooks?" I asked, matching her stride.

"What?" She scrunched up her face in confusion.

"The cook. He gave you burgers at the restaurant." I jabbed my thumb backwards.

"Oh, him." She shrugged. "Kind of, I guess. I got him an MP3 player, so he gives me burgers every once in a while."

"You gave him one? Why not just use the money you used to buy the MP3 to buy food instead?"

She glanced at me sideways. "Did I say I bought it?"

Stolen then.

"How did you manage to get it out of the store?" I asked.

She shook her head. "I didn't say I got it from a store either. People leave their crap unattended all the time."

God. What happened to that shy girl from three years ago?

A police car turned onto the quiet street. They must’ve been out on patrol, just looking for people up to no good. People like Higoshi, I guess.

"Crap," she said.

She grabbed my wrist and pulled me into the shadows between houses, pressing herself against me and pushing me into the side of a house with her hand over my mouth, as if I was a hostage and going to call out for help or something. I didn't bother to move her hand though. I was much too focused on the way my heart was hammering away in my chest. Why did she get me so worked up? It had reacted the same way when I’d seen her earlier that morning. I couldn’t even remember the last time it beat that hard. It was fantastic.

The police car passed and continued down the street. Higoshi removed her hand and stepped back onto the sidewalk.

"Running from the cops?" I asked, joining her.

"Yeah, right," she scoffed. "I'm not stupid enough to get caught, but if they see us out here walking around, they'll probably stop and ask us questions."

I watched as the tail lights disappeared from sight. "Does it matter?"

"Yes. All the good little boys and girls are at home." She pushed up the corners of her mouth with her fingers, creating a fake smile, and then dropped it with an eye roll. "At the very least, they are in well-lit areas, not dead end neighborhood roads."

I laughed and she started walking briskly again.

"You don't want to go home, then?" I asked, catching up to her.

"Of course not. Why do you think I'm out here?"

"You don't think that's a little risky?” I asked. “Walking around out here by yourself?"

She laughed. "I do it all the time."

That's wasn't really what I asked.

We walked in silence for a little while longer, but the question I really wanted to ask pressed its way into my head and wouldn't leave me alone. That one thought had been weighing on my mind for three years. I wanted to ask it so badly I could practically feel the words on my tongue.

"Hey, Higoshi." I stopped.

She sighed and turned around to face me. "Can we skip that crap, please? It's Saki, alright? I hate that name."

"Saki, then." I paused and looked down, jamming my hands into my pockets. "Why did you try to kill yourself?" I peered back up at her.

She smirked. "Just the over dramatic reaction of a child. You shouldn't worry about it, and you shouldn't spend your time worrying about me either. In fact, you should probably be more concerned about that girl you bailed on in the restaurant."

My body stiffened. I had completely forgotten about Kaho.

I yanked the phone out of my pocket. It had to have been at least twenty minutes since I left her there. I had a few missed calls and about a dozen text messages, all from Kaho. They started with "Are you alright?", and ended with a string of colorful language telling me not to even bother calling her back. She seemed pretty pissed. I don't think I'd ever heard her curse before.

"Hey..." I trailed off as I looked up.

Saki was gone. I turned around in a circle, but there was no sign of her anywhere. I sighed and started my long walk to retrace my steps back home.

The next day, I got up and went about my normal routine. Kaho wasn't waiting outside like she usually did, so I walked to school myself.

Just after I got through the front gate, Kaho caught me by the arm and dragged me over to some trees, away from the other students.

"I'm really sorry about last night," I said, after she released my arm.

"Explain yourself, jerk." She folded her arms in front of her and glared at me.

Maybe I should've lied. My story didn't sound so great and I couldn't really explain it all that well. I suppose, it wouldn't have done me any good. It's not like I had a lie ready and she deserved the truth anyway.

"I saw a girl from my class and I followed her, hoping to catch up,” I said. “I knew her from a few years ago."

Her glare intensified. "So, you saw a girl you used to know, lied about why you got up in the first place, and then just left me there for nearly a whole half hour while you had a chat?"

Have you ever done something you knew was stupid and then realized how much worse it was when someone says it out loud?

"Yeah," I said slowly. "It was just to talk, though. I swear." I put my hands up.

I wondered if she was going to slap me. I would've slapped me, if I was a girl. She was quiet for a minute. Then she unfolded her hands and let out a long sigh.

"Kaito, I don't think this is going to work out."

I nodded at her.

I knew it was coming. It's not like I was in the habit of running out on my dates, but my relationships always had an expiration date, and it was usually around a month. I think at some point they realized that their feelings weren’t returned and they think it best to move on. Kaho was getting pretty close to the end of that month, although my thoughtless disappearing act probably hastened her decision.

"It's not just last night." She looked down. "I've been noticing it for a while now. You're nice, usually, but I don't really think there is anything between us. I asked you out because I liked you, but I don't think you feel the same way about me." She wiped her eyes.

I wish I could've reassured her, but she wasn't wrong.

"I'm sorry things couldn't have worked out differently," I told her.

She nodded. "I hope you find happiness in the future." She ran off in the direction of the school.

“Me too,” I mumbled to no one after she’d left.

I headed to the classroom. I was dreading sitting next to Saki yesterday, but now I was sort of looking forward to it. She couldn’t run away if she was forced to sit next to me all day. Plus, I had to figure out if she was the one making my heart race.

"Hey," Hiromasa said as I sat down.

"Hi," I said.

I glanced over at Saki’s empty desk.

"You want to do something after school?" he asked. "Unless you already have something planned with Kaho?"

"She broke up with me."

"Really? Man, that sucks. She was really sweet too.” He folded his hands behind his head and leaned back in his chair. “I'm still not sure if your record shows you have good luck or bad luck with women."

"Me neither,” I said.

The bell rang to signal the start of class and still no Saki. Who the hell skips on the second day?

Rain droplets started to collect on the window and I realized I’d forgotten my umbrella. I sighed and planted my head on the desk. It was going to be a long day.

The third day of school came and went. No Saki.

In the evening, I sat on my bed and tried to keep my mind occupied by blaring rock music and reading manga. It was useless. Why would she skip two days in a row at the beginning of the year? Did she get sick? What if something bad happened to her after she left the other night? What if she did something to herself? My stomach dropped.

No, that couldn’t be it, right? Someone would have let us know if something serious happened, wouldn't they?

I threw the manga down and put my head in my hands, digging my fingers into my hair. I groaned at no one in particular.

There was one place I knew she went. It was a long shot and a half, but I was going to lose my mind if I sat there any longer.

I headed out to the restaurant we were at the other day and went around to the back. I stood there and stared at the metal door in front of me. Was I nuts? Maybe I should've just turned around and headed home. I couldn't though. I would've just been back to wanting to tear my hair out.

I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. After a few moments, it swung open and the same guy from before leaned out the door.

"Who the hell are you?" he asked.

"Uh...no one in particular. Listen, you haven't seen Saki around the past two days, have you?"

"Saki? Who is Saki?" he asked.

"Higoshi Saki." I said. "She is a girl my age, long hair, gave you an MP3 player."

"Oh." He paused. "I wonder if she ever told me her name. Anyway, I haven't seen her since Monday."

"Right, thanks."

"Don't knock on this door again alright?" He pointed at the door. "It's bad enough she comes around the back. I don't need two of you, got it?" He slammed the door without waiting for a response.

There was only one other place I knew she went. I started following the same path I followed Saki on the other night. Eventually, I ended up on the same street we were on when she ran off. There was no sign of her. I continued to follow the road. The occupied houses started to thin out, until it was mostly abandoned and worn down places. What was up with this neighborhood? Were they planning to build something there?

I followed the road until I came to an apartment building. After that, it was a four way intersection which meant it was the end of the line. After all, I would have no way of knowing which way she went. Well, I guess I knew it was a stupid plan anyway. I turned around and there she was, leaning against a utility pole. Had she been there the whole time? My heartbeat quickened.

"Are you stalking me or something?" she asked.

Maybe a little.

She was still wearing that black hoodie, but had traded the jeans for a pair of shorts and boots that were way too big for her. She was holding a glass bottle with a little bit of clear liquid left in it, which I guessed probably wasn’t water. Where did she get it? Another stolen trade?

"No." I walked over to her. "You haven't been in school the last couple of days. I was just wondering if you were alright."

She snickered. "Worried about me? Well, as you can see, I'm fine."

"Right." I answered.

It grew quiet.

"Something else?" She clicked her index finger against the bottle, her ring clinking against the glass.

I didn't answer for a minute, unsure of how the proposal would sound. "I thought you might be kind of fun to hang out with."

She erupted into laughter. Her whole body shook. She pressed her free hand against her face and leaned her head back into the pole, continuing to laugh. Then, all at once, she went quiet and still.

A smile spread across her lips, a sinister, dark, marvelous smile. "Are you sure? I'm a monster, you know?"

My heart beat so fast I practically had to gasp for breath. I've never been so sure about anything in my life.

"Yes."