《My Vampire Assistant》22. Speak of the devil
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Since the deal didn’t pass, the post about selling the coffin still hanged on the forum. JJ told me not to dwell on that failure—well, I didn’t need his advice for that. I preferred my life stress-free, and so it went on. Though it still stung a little.
To help distract myself from it, I did what I should’ve done days ago. After another sweep through the flea markets—this time, I didn’t meet neither Avarice nor her nephew—I took a bus right to a curtains store.
Once again I wished I had a car and a driving license as I hauled the heavy bundle through the store’s backdoor. It was past work hours by now, and I half-expected JJ to be gone—hunting or whatever he did in his spare time. But there was a light on in the office, and I grinned at seeing it.
“Hi, JJ!” I threw at his slouched over the computer figure as I walked in. “I’m going to need your help in a moment.”
“Hello, ma chèrie,” JJ said, turning towards me and resting an elbow on the back of his chair. He gave me an indulgent, suggestive smile. “What trouble you might need my assistance with?”
I put the bundle in my hands on a table and pointed at it. “This.”
Without waiting for JJ’s answer, I went to the basement to unload and catalogue today’s purchases. There wasn’t a lot of them. By the time I returned twenty minutes later, JJ had unpacked the bundle.
Inside was a set of half-transparent green curtains that now were sprawled over the table. JJ stood over them with a contemplative look that disappeared as soon as I walked in.
“I told you it was unnecessary, ma chèrie,” he said, clicking his tongue. That didn’t diminish his smile, though. He lifted a hand to his heart. “Yet it pleases me to know that you care for my well-being.”
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I waved at him dismissively, though I was grinning myself. There were few things more pleasurable than making a great, thoughtful gift and having it appreciated by the recipient. Still, there was no need for JJ to know how much exactly I was glad that he was glad. He was entirely too smug as he was.
“I would’ve been a terrible boss if I let you work in hazardous conditions, JJ. Now you just need to hang them.”
No way I was going to expose myself to my fear of heights and shaky stepladders when I had an able-bodied vampire in the vicinity.
⠀⠀ ⠀
“You bought curtains?” Panda asked me next morning as I helped her open the store.
Panda usually worked evenings because of her studies, but with the semester being close to over, she had time to work in mornings and even full-time, which I granted her both for financial support and to spare JJ sunburns. He still made huge sales whenever he appeared, so it wasn’t a problem.
“Yeah, the sun is too bright without them,” I said. “How are exams coming?”
Panda visibly cringed. “As hatefully as always. Will you be against it if I study in here while there are no customers, Diana?”
“That’s alright. How you and JJ are coming along?” I looked at Panda with burning curiosity. She just shrugged.
“He’s fine.”
I deflated, disappointed. Saying something like that about JJ, the brightest person I’ve ever seen in my life, was a clear sign Panda didn’t want to talk. I sighed.
“Alright, alright. Hey,” I remembered something. “Want to come with me to Teremok after your shift? You know, for dinner. Another friend of mine will be there too.”
“If you are paying for me,” Panda agreed immediately. I smirked. Two things always worked with her: money and food. What didn’t work with her: shame.
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“It’s a deal.”
⠀⠀ ⠀
“…and then I said, ‘Well, sorry, but I can’t sleep with you because we don’t have human-sized condoms, you dick!’”
I burst in chuckles at the joke, even as I hid my face in embarrassment. Next to me, Panda beamed from ear to ear.
“You sure showed him his place, Rita,” Panda said.
I nodded, still laughing. “I must say, Rita, I was surprised to hear that you actually have standards,” I teased, finally dropping my hands on the table.
My idea to invite Panda to a meeting with Rita was a total success. Even my usually quiet employee opened up under Rita’s positivity. As a bonus, Rita didn’t pester me about my love life as much now that she could do that with Panda.
“Oh yeah? Well, I have more standards than you, Diana. How’s your ex doing?” Rita asked, giving me a narrow-eyed look.
Uh-oh. I jinxed it.
“He keeps sending me these SMS that I keep reading out of morbid curiosity. Asks for a meeting and all that,” I said sourly. “Keeps insisting that he loves me.”
Panda scowled. “That’s just mean.”
“I don’t like the sound of that, girlfriend.” Rita’s expression was concerned. “You didn’t move since high school, right? So he knows where you live. What if he starts to stalk you?”
Damn, I didn’t think of that. I rubbed my forehead. “Well, that would’ve been bad. I guess I can ask JJ to walk with me if I need to go out late…”
“Him?” Rita looked even more concerned now. “Are you sure this is a good idea?”
As fascinated as she was with the historical value of vampires, she seemed to take my danger warnings close to heart. Maybe a bit too close.
Panda nodded. “He looks like a type that would only get beaten himself if he ever tried to save someone from a mugger.”
I understood both their problems with JJ and found them absolutely fictional. He wasn’t a weakling, even if he still looked a bit too thin, and vampire or not, JJ showed himself a good protector.
But since Panda didn’t know about vampires, I only said, “Do you know about anyone better?”
Rita opened her mouth to say something when a sound of my name caused my head to turn towards the diner’s entrance.
“Diana!” repeated the man who walked towards our table with brisk, purposeful stride and a furious expression. “Why do you keep ignoring my messages?”
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