As rough as she had found etiquette that morning, firmly focusing upon her wax tablet as her loquacious mathematics professor waxed profound upon topics Jess barely understood, ears burning with the rumors circulating even in that class, so many curious stares sent her way. Whispers that she had been broken. Tamed. That she was consigned for finishing school, and a Squire no longer. Those last comments had sickened her, but not so much as the hurt stares flashed her way by Neal and Lucas both, fellow Squires who, for all their differences, had accepted Jess as one of their own from the day she had first kitted up as one of Eloquin's Chosen.

"Jess, is it true?" Four soft words. Jess was forced to look up from a bowl of stew she couldn't bear to eat, Neal of the perpetually unruly hair pinning her gaze with his own.

Hazel eyes demanded an answer.

Jess grimaced and looked away. For some reason, she was unable to say a word.

All but trembling, she waited until she sensed him turn away, only then looking at Malek, solemnly seating himself beside her, powerful arms squeezing her shoulders, saying nothing, waiting for her to speak in her own time.

“Thank you.”

He shrugged. “I didn't go to class today because I wanted to strangle that bitch and throw her right through that stained glass window you so adore.” he flashed a bleak smile. “Somehow, I didn't think you or Eloquin would approve, so I just spent the morning pounding my frustrations at the pells. Not that those hunks of armored meat will be suitable for anything but pig scrap, well cured as they are.”

Jess smiled. “I'm glad you skipped class, then. Sometimes discretion is the better part of valor.”

Malek grimaced. “From what I could glean, Putrice really is playing a long game, and is deadly intent upon seeing you expelled. Frankly, I think you actually conceding to the dress just might have surprised her. Maybe you did do the smart thing. Maybe if you play the game she sets she will have to keep to her own accord, and not seek to see you expelled, for all that a friend assured me she had heard no less than three of our professors eager to see things come to a head for you." Malek flashed a bleak smile. "Or perhaps her ire is itself an act, and all this a farce to see you attend her little gala like a frightened doe, docile and compliant, sweetmeats for all the boys to gaze upon, making her fete a complete success."

Jess winced, her stomach roiling at the news. To think that far more than bland indifference, her professors were actively conspiring against her truly sickened her.

“Jess. What are we going to do?”

Jess turned to face Malek, gentle brown eyes filling up her world. She flinched and looked away.

Some things could never be.

"I don't know, Malek. I just think back upon Eloquin's lessons, and I remember that sometimes the hard choice is the one you must face, head-on. And sometimes it pays to do just what your enemies expect."

Malek flashed a grim smile. “So that when you pivot and turn, it is when they least expect it, so certain they had you figured out. And somehow, I doubt Putrice thought you'd ever concede to dress and... makeup, I see.”

Jess felt her cheeks redden. “That's Josie's bit of magic. I'm afraid of what would happen if I tried.”

Malek grinned, his gaze strangely gentle, which didn't help Jess's blush one bit.

“You know, Jess...”

“Don't say it.”

Malek chuckled softly. "I will say it anyway. Seeing you like this, as beautiful as any princess, makes me glad that maybe you can be spared the madness we will be embracing, two nights hence." His wink was teasing, but his words were painfully sincere. "It would be a comfort to me, knowing you will be safe here, no matter what fate has in store for us out there. Jess?"

But Jess had already turned away, heart racing, darting for her quarters as fast as her legs swishing in clumsy dresses would take her.

“Jess, wait up!”

“Leave me be, Malek!” Jess snapped.

“Jess, hold on!”

Eyes flashing, she turned on her friend. “How dare you treat me as just another wallflower, Malek! We're brothers in battle and blood, you said so yourself! When everyone else looked askance at us, we stuck together and doubled our efforts until the whole damn band of Squires had to acknowledge that we have just as much right to be there as them!”

Jess clenched her hands into helpless fists. “And my bloody mother, so damned determined to control my life, is making it impossible for me to fight by your side when you all need me the most!"

A painful silence, Malek gazing at her strangely, before bowing his head. “You're right, Jess, I'm sorry. It's just that...”

“It's just that you care for me, you want to protect me, even though we are lovers no longer. I get it, Malek. I really do. My brother-in-arms, my closest friend, even if you've given your heart to another.”

Malek squeezed his eyes shut, nodding once. “Jacob needs me, Jess. You know that.”

“I do.”

"Jess... I'm sorry. I just... I'd fight by your side to Hell and back, but all the same, if anything were to happen..."

Jess flashed a bitter smile, ignoring the tears pouring freely down her cheeks. "Don't you think I feel the same, Malek? About all of you? As terrified as I am of blackening my dagger, how much worse would it be to know you all were heading off to threats unknown, and I was forced to stay behind, worrying as to whether my friends were alive or dead, and knowing that there was not a damned thing I could do, stuck here in this stupid dress?"

More than a few stares were sent their way, students hurrying past at a brisk pace, too discrete to gawk openly. Jess did her best to ignore them, prudent even now to speak only in the vaguest terms about what was to come.

Malek gazed solemnly at a trembling Jess for some moments. “So what will you do?”

A bitter shake of her head. “I don't know!”

Gentle arms swept her up, holding her close.

There was nothing Jess hated so more than to feel so trapped and helpless, just another silly girl in a dress being comforted by her man. It didn't keep her from sobbing in his arms.