《God-Ish》Chapter 49.5: A Wrathful Lie - Smile (Interlude)
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“Grasp the air and hold steady, of thin waters, light as feathers. Flow freely, without a guide and dance with the aimless winds together: [Bubbles]! Oooooh! I did it! I did it! How pretty...”
“That was perfect. You did very well for your first time, Eru.”
"Ehehe. It was a cinch!"
Oh, it’s this again. That voice, it has been quite some time since I’ve heard that one. It used to complement me often, whenever I would properly mimic their teachings. They used to say that magic had the ability to change the world itself, however they would only teach me mundane spells like the one here. A chant without substance, a display of lighthearted and carefree magic. Yet, I could remember their smile, and only that, vividly as I succeeded. One that mother would often say came very rarely from that person during those days. That person? Who were they again?
“Ghhrg...”
This pain. Why is it always like this? Each and every time? I don’t understand why. Liar.
“Soon enough, you’ll possibly even surpass me.”
“Really?! Ehehe.”
“But you have to keep studying, since practice makes perfect. You’ll do that for me, won’t you?”
“I will! I’ll even surprise you the next time, just wait!”
“I’ll hold you to that. Now, how about a story again, hm?”
“Oooh! Which one are you going to tell this time, ⌧”
“Ghrgh! Again...?”
“Hmm. Last time was about her, so how about this time I tell you...”
Like the prolonged shutting of one’s eyes, my vision faded into a blank darkness as that person’s voice was silenced. And as my eyes opened once more, I was greeted by a scene I couldn’t understand in the slightest. Liar. A scattered mess laid before me, pieces of something. I couldn’t hear nor feel anything, yet my gaze was locked onto two figures across from me. Blanketed in a vague appearance, I couldn’t make out who they were. Liar. I could only see the motion of their jaws move ever so slightly.
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"..."
They were apparently talking as their lips were moving, but I couldn’t make any sense to their voiceless words. Then one of them approached me, kneeling to my level as they clutched at something near me. Something with the same shade of hair that my mother had. I couldn’t tell what it could be. Liar. Was it a doll of some sort?
"..."
That person before me then smiled. I knew this smile. It was that same smile that person had always given me. Liar. One that left me feeling warm inside, as if I had achieved something amazing. Liar. Was that figure in front of me now, that person? It had to be, since I’d know that smile anywhere. Liar. And as the enshrouding over their face brightened and disappeared, I could now see their eyes for the first time. Those eyes. Wait, I actually knew those eyes too, didn’t I? Of course, I did because they were my...
“Ghrgh! What is this...?!”
I studied those eyes now. Those eyes weren’t kind, neither were they imbued in any delight or worry for me at all. They were withdrawn, seemingly looking beyond me. Glazed over and empty. These weren’t the eyes I knew. Liar. And as their hand lifted toward my face, a surge of pain came over me once more as my vision became a sporadic mess. A flickering seizure of their now frozen yet swaying hand replayed— repeatedly—in front of me. Never moving forward nor pulling back as my eyes closed.
“Blaargh...!”
An overpowering retching swelled, one that was seemingly bound to me indefinitely. The slow creeping of time was now without mercy. Over and over again, it felt as if it would never disappear. In this lingering darkness, I could only feel, and nothing else. That is, until my vision brightened once more. Had I overcome that endless torment? It seemed so as I was now greeted with that smile, one that extended to their eyes this time. Liar.
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“See, he really does always smile every time he sees me, mother...” Liar. Liar. Liar.
He? Liar. Who is he? Liar. I don’t know who he is. Liar. Why? Why? Why? Why? What is this feeling?! I don’t like this feeling at all! Liar. Stop! Liar. My vision was shifting, swaying, fading, and breaking apart. The retching recommenced.
“Blaargh!!”
“Eru, I want you to remember this phrase. This chant is a special one. It may sound strange, but don’t worry, it’s something like an audible charm. One for only you and I.”
“Hm? A charm?”
“Yes, a charm. You see...”
Don’t say it. Liar. Don’t speak it. Liar. I don’t want to hear it. Liar. Those words mean nothing to me. Liar. Just leave me alone. Liar. Don’t say it. Don’t say it. Don’t say it. Don’t say it. Don’t say it!
“Eru, I want you to embrace your ⌧...”
That word. That phrase. That charm. Oh. I know that one.
“I will attempt to gain access to and find out everything available about this mark though. Once I do, I will return and help you as best as I can, all right?”
Mr. Elemnin? Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar.
“Hey, Albel. Is it really fine for me to come along...?”
“Hm? Having second thoughts already? It has only been a few hours since we left Druhwood. A bit early to start feeling homesick.”
“That’s not it! It’s just that... With how I am, will everything be okay...?”
“Ah. So, that’s what you mean? Don’t worry too much about it, all right? Torrel asked me to keep you safe, and I plan on doing just that.”
Albel? Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar. Liar.
“I promise, everything is going to be fine, okay? You know I would never lie to you. I’ll come back for you as soon as I can, but you need to make sure you stay right here—in this very same spot. Do you understand me?”
"Pokitu guweskrtr pokitu guweskrtr pokitu guweskrtr pokitu guweskrtr pokitu."
Lie after lie after lie after lie after lie.
"Ongukr'ca wesinqtu. kikr'ca wesinqtu. kikr'ca zeluguef."
That's fine. It's fine. It's okay.
"Ki fozuoo uhguan nt rigulutu cazuer kikr'ca krin poguoo pokitu krinef tuletr eest, brkivuuhkr?"
I just have to make sure it’s the last lie they ever tell, right?
"Kikr'ca ongukr cakirinnpotu."
It's that simple.
"Pokilutu in cagukinui, ki fozuoo uhguan nt turirubrguiotu rief..."
Like he said, I just have to embrace my...
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