After a while I got used to flowing Lu towards my arm, enough so that I could keep both it and Moon transformed at the same time, though it did take an uncomfortable bit of concentration.

"Did you give it a name?" asked Zanir.

"No... I don't think he likes me very much, he doesn't answer me like Moon does," I said.

"Be careful, Mika. Try not constantly giving Lu to it, the more you do, the more the bond between your sernaz get stronger."

"Right," I said, stopping the Lu flow, the arm returning to its original state. The problem with not using Lu was that I lost the ability to move my arm again, despite looking as it was before the poison, except now with the ironic added bonus of a centipede tattoo coiling around it.

After I defeated the centipede sectioned that now resides in my left arm, Zanir told me I was ready. We never really talked much, before, only when he was teaching me his language—which I was now quite fluent on, surprisingly—but even then, we weren't really having a conversation. But during the time I stayed on his cave, healing the damage I took against the centipede and some lingering ones from Moon, we talked, rather, I talked. He only asked me a number of questions, starting with...

"Who are you?"

It was weird, asking me that when we were about to part ways and not when we met, but I told him everything that happened to me since I left work that night, about getting stabbed and about Asha, it all seemed a long time ago. He listened in silence, it was hard telling a few details because I didn't know the words for things like 'night' or 'dog', so I just either said the closest word I knew or just said them in my language and tried making gestures like he did when teaching me. When I finished, he asked me another question, one that confirmed my suspicions, what I was most afraid of.

"Mika... where exactly are you from?"

"What do you mean? Like, my country?" I asked.

"There's only one kingdom, Mika. Arness," He said, a serious.

"What are you... Arness? What are you talking about, there are hundreds of countries," I said, confused.

Am I using the wrong word for 'country'?

"Arness is around fifteen fades in that direction, humanity's only kingdom," he said, pointing to the tunnel and right. "So, where did you come from?"

"Outside," I said. The word probably didn't mean 'outside' as I inteded, but my vocabulary was limited.

"Outside of where?"

"This cave, these tunnels, outside."

He only gave me a slightly puzzled look, one of concern.

Honestly, I was in denial, I don't know why. Maybe I was just afraid, that if a man like him wasn't able to leave this place, I had no chance. I tried, to the best of my abilities, telling him about the sun, the moon and about the sky. But the more I talked, the more evident became that Zanir had never in his life left underground.

"A place with nothing above us, a body of water so vast that you can't see the end of it, an eternal ball of fire that illuminates everywhere. Your kingdom sounds a lot like Tamir."

"Tamir?" I asked.

"Really good place, where your sernaz go to when you die having lived a good life. Some would say having lived for the kingdom's benefit," he said, the last part with scorn.

Like heaven? I thought.

"I won't lie to you, Mika, I don't believe your story. I want to, the me from the past would have, but I can't," he said, a distant feeling to his eyes, "If... if there's really such a place, I hope you can find it, I can only tell you how to get to Arness."

If it exists, I thought. It felt less likely that he was lying, now, with how long I've lived with Zanir and all the unbelievable things I'd seen, but it was still hard to swallow that he came from an underground kingdom that no one had ever heard about.

"Can't you take me there?"

"I can't, the people there have given up on a better life. So I've given up on them. Maybe some of them still have hope, find those who do, you'll need help in that journey to paradise of yours."

He gave me his two wooden tubes, one filled with water and the other with sectioned meat. He also handed me his grayish white bag and what looked like a test tube, filled with a glasslike, whitish sand.

Then he walked to the covered hole at the back of the room and grabbed a piece of clothing very similar to his own, a shirt that extended to a knee-length skirt, all with arda carapace covering the most important parts in the torso and in vertical rectangular plates on the skirt, the only difference from Zanir's was that the fabric on that one was of a slight cream color, while his were gray.

"Here," he said, handing me the clothing.

My blue shirt had been unusable for some time now, since the fight with Moon, my pants were also in bad shape, so I really appreciated.

"Thank you," I said, temporarily transforming my arm so I could better put the clothes on.

It wasn't too heavy, despite its appearence, the material was soft and a bit rough at the same time, and it also had a belt with a holster on each side, I put Moon on the right side.

"Who was it from?"

It felt fine on me, but it was a little too small for him, and I never saw him use anything different from his usual gray garments.

"I made it. A present for my wife."

I didn't ask further, his expression and she not being there was answer enough.

"Are you sure about all this?" I asked, gesturing to the tubes and bag.

"Yes, you'll need it more than me."

"What is this?" I said, grabbing the test tube.

"A lightkeeper. Come," he said, walking out to the tunnels.

We only walked for a few seconds before he stopped and crouched down to take some of the thin white vines that were growing around the glowing crystals. We went back and he mashed them into a white, slightly syrupy liquid. He opened the test tube and poured the liquid inside, and the sand started to glow.

"Cool," I said, slipping to my language.

"Is that the way of talking of your kingdom?"

"Yeah."

"What does it mean?"

"Hm... something like approval and admiration of something," I said.

" I see," he said, putting the lightkeeper necklace on me. "When the light goes out, one fade will have passed and you'll need to change the essence again. There's a map on the bag, if you're fast, you should reach Arness in twelve to fifteen fades."

Was 'fade' the way he used to measure time? If he had told me before, It would have made my cycle counting more organized, roughly two hundred and ten cycles had passed since I woke up in the tunnels, but it wasn't a reliable number.

"My fighting style is using two weapons, it's the one I taught you," he said, walking to the wall with the weapons, "you never used two weapons at the same time due to your arm, but I'm sure you can do it, if you try, you're a quick learner."

He stopped in front of the other axe from the pair Moon was a part of, then took the hammer beside it. The head wasn't too big nor too small, it felt just right, one side of it was a square, and the other a spike shaped like a cone, the handle was of the same material, but wrapped in black cloth.

"The axe you now have was from my disciple, a son to me. This hammer was from my leader, my best friend." he said, feeling the weapon in his hands, "Both of them were trying to achieve what you are after, a home, they died saving me, and the dream was lost..."

I was quite good on reading expressions, especially the bad ones, an ability I unfortunately acquired through experience. Zanir's was a kind of sadness that I'd seen too many times, caused by regret, one I'd often find in the mirror.

He looked me in the eyes, and said, "Listen to me, Mika, fear is important, it keeps you alive, but it's also dangerous. The fear others had was what killed my family. Never let fear be the wind that extinguishes your fire, make it the element that makes it stronger."

He handed me the hammer, saying, "Be afraid. Be brave."

It felt heavy, but it was easy to move, surprisingly comfortable in the grip of my left hand.

"You know... you said they were trying to find a home, but there's a saying back where I'm from that goes something like 'home is where your family is', so if they died saving you, I think they did it protecting their home."

The embarassment hit me straight after that one, quite the cheesy line, even for me.

"I guess you're right," he said, smiling.

"Of course I am," I said, awkwardly.

He walked back to the hole, opened and searched for something, then came back and handed it to me. A necklace, the pendant was a metal circle that resembled a blade, and had a piece of metal cut in the shape of a flame in the center. The flame had metallic color hues that danced in a way that felt almost alive.

"It's the insignia of my unit, the Cleave," he said, showing me a tattoo on his chest, "that necklace belongs to the leader."

"Wait, Zanir, are you sure about this? Isn't it something important?" I asked.

"It is. Don't worry, there aren't any members left besides me, but the symbol must still be known to some people. Be careful, there are those who might help if you show them this, and those who will kill you. Show only to the ones you trust to be good people."

"Thanks," I said, putting it around my neck, "what does 'Cleave' mean? And this symbol?"

"Cleave means 'to cut' something, anything that stand in your way, in our case. It also means 'to stick together no matter what', like we did as a family. We believed that humanity is a big fire, each human its flames, trying to stay lit among the dark. That's what the symbol means."

"That's... a nice way of seeing things" I said, "anything else I need to know?"

"Your arm and Moon, don't show them transformed, especially your arm. Infusing weapons is permitted to some warriors, strong ones tha are able to control the sernaz in their weapon, but infusing a part of your body, or even armor, is strictly forbidden," he said. "You should know why."

I knew, even now, I could feel the centipede waiting for me to falter. It was a tense feeling, unlike Moon, no, even Moon. I had to constantly pay attention to my flow of Lu whenever I transformed them, otherwise they would start taking more thant I could handle, and before I noticed, there wouldn't be a 'me' anymore.

"It's dangerous," I said.

"Yes, a liability," he confirmed, "not only for the user but for the one around them."

I nodded.

"There's nothing else for me to teach you, Mika, I hope you find your home, you find Asha," he said, walking to the main tunnel with me.

I didn't think I would feel so sad about leaving, it had to happen at some point, but now I just wished it had been later than sooner. I never really bowed to someone, but at that time, it felt like the right thing to do.

"Thank you, Zanir, for everything."

"Cool," he said, smiling.

I chuckled a little, before saying, "Not quite how you're supposed to use it, but I'll take it, you're cool too."

"Farewell," I said.

I was already running, and wasn't able to see him behind me anymore, but I clearly heard him say, "May your flame burn brightly."