《The Blood-Soaked Circus》Neo-web Entry 2

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I remember the cold. Not the nippy, red cheeks kind of course. Frost covered the walls, my fingers were blue... I honestly don't know how long I was in that frozen hell. It was probably no longer than a few hours, but it was more than long enough.

When they had finally opened the door to that freezer...my legs were dead. At least that's what they told me. I could still feel one of them, just a little. Unfortunately, I didn't realize that until the bonesaw was already tearing through the flesh above my knees.

I blacked out from the pain, any fourteen year old would. When I woke up, I was handed a bill and thrown into a back alley with a chip in my neck to make sure I couldn't run from the Hounds. The fucking hounds...loan officers in the Glimmer district's terminology.

They visited me every week, just to harrass and intimidate me. Be it raining, sunny, or even in the middle of a piss-break. Every. Single. Week. They were there.

After a month, I had to pay. Needless to say I couldn't. I...I couldn't even walk.

They found me under a pile of rubble that used to be a wayward home for street urchin. Unfortunately for it, one of them had a facination with fire.

Anyway, within three hours I was chained to a dirty length of pipe along with several tens of other kids. A slave market, in case some of my better faring readers were unable to infer. There were other...disfigured, children aside from myself.

Missing fingers, eyes, etcetera. However, I was the only one without both legs. I stayed in that little sewer way for months. It almost made the freezer seem like a dream. Thousands of times I remember thinking 'If only I hadn't gone after the meat'. I had lived off of vermin and the garbage bins behind various restaurants, like every other child in the slums.

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We were fed moss and insects at the market, once every other day. I was fed less, given my ailment. I watched so many children die in that hole...heard so many cry in terror as particularly carniverous beastkin purchased them. The scent of urine as a little girl that had stayed beside me for weeks was dragged away to become a carnal toy for some Glimmer district prick.

I rarely dream now. It's only nightmares. However, they have been a part of my life for so long...that now I enjoy them. Some people fear the terrors that assail them. I have learned to become enraged.

A monster tries to kill you? Run at it and die drenched in it's blood and yours.

Being held to the ground and assaulted by something you couldn't hope to push off of you? Rip it's throat out with your teeth.

Fear, dearest reader, is nothing more than an abstract construct of your mind. Sentient beings have two basic instincts: Run, or Fight.

If you learn to choose fight enough, you eventually find out that it's no different from trying to escape. After all, if you fail in either scenario, you die. That's why you have to choose as early as you can; Will I live in fear, or die in a fury?

My choice, most esteemed audience, is to kill and die in the most grandiose, extravagant, and violent way that I can.

Why? Because I have everything to lose. Every friend, every unit, and every second of my life could be lost. Might as well enjoy and protect what is mine before it's ripped away from me.

After all, this is a city ruled by the strong, self-centered and corrupt. I believe I fit that description rather smugly.

Seen(57) Comments(19)

BellyBoyyo: Dawm dood i dunt hav my left err that soundz ruff tho.

Lillia: That's so sad! You're still a totez psycho, but that's kinda hot...

BIGWOLF: When the cops catch you, I hope they cut your fucking arms off too you fucking criminal!

Lil'Giant: Oi @BIGWOLF, you wanna die, huh????

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