“R-Ray-Ray, don’t look! Don't look!! (O///O)"

“…Sleipnir...Are you a mermaid? Or are you stuck getting into a sleeping bag again?"

“I SAID DON’T LOOK [email protected] IT!”

The shore of Dunkerque, France were very convenient for the war effort. Mostly because there are the existence of Imperial German U-boat that were scouring under the water, dominating the aquatic free range. Their very purpose of creation is much like a battleship, only they were capable of diving down at various depths, and then pop up to shoot down any allied vessels in their area. In a sense, it was similar to a 'surprise motherf**ker' class scenario, but that was no the primary case right now. 

In Europe, where the main theatre of war was most wild, of course there would be a fleet of U-Boats filing the seas around Britain, Germany, France, and Italy. The best way to avoid them would be to use prototype sonars, but they’re only effective to a limited range. Once it detects the enemy underwater ship, them torpedoes were already half way from sinking them. At most, a wall of underwater mines would help, but as the Germans were developing anti-mine technology, it was only a matter of time before they cut through the floating defenses. However, with the existence of magic and magicians, a new form of anti U-Boat tactic had been deployed.

“So let me get this straight. There are witches that can transform into fish, witches that control fishes, and witches who could shape their lower half after a fish… So, are you a real mermaid by chance? Actually, don't move. I want to take a picture of you for my sisters back home. Cicely and Inez are definitely going to post your portrait in their bedrooms.”

“I-I told you don’t look at me! Th-this Transformation Spell is only effective if I’m naked! Th-the fibres in clothing wi-will only distort and interfere with the Arcanic Formula so I have to be stripped clean to use the spell! M-my hair may be long enough to over my breasts, b-but my lower half is still in danger! Even if ‘that area’ is covered in transparent fish scales! N-now look away!...ENGLISH, RAYMOND COLLISHAW, DO YOU SPEAK IT!? STOP TAKING MY PICTURES FOR YOUR PERVERTED SISTERS!!!!!”

The hidden Magic Corp that was supporting the British, Australia, French, Italian, and American fronts were working around the clock to both help their non-magic comrades in the war, without violating their protocol of absolute Magic Secrecy. It was a fine line to cross, so it took time and consideration before they use any tactics to help the war effort.

For example, deploying Allied Witches who specialize in animal transofmration, animal manipulation, or even animal personification. The last one was to turn into human form of the chosen animal, the upper half a person and the lower half the animal. The legends of centaurs and mermaids were all based on sightings of undercover magicians searching for U-Boats or artillery hidden in forests, apparantly (added with some swigs of Whiskey).

Namely, a certain Canadian Witch that a certain Canadian Pilot was paired up with was part of the Underwater Survey Corp to prevent enemy U-Boats from sliping through cracks in the anti-ship mine defensive. That, or to warn the local allied bases of a possible invasion by aquatic beasts summoned from the enemy's power. It was hard work, but the program had a lot of happy (healthy) volunteers.

“…Say. About the Canadian Witch Corp. It’s really does consisted of nothing but girls, right?”

“THAT’S THE F**KING REASON WHY I KEEP TELLING YOU TO NOT LOOK! NO RUN AWAY OR THEY'LL INITIATE THEIR OWN VERSION OF THE WITCH HUNT ON YOU, BUCKO!”

Raymond Collishaw was the name of the Canadian Pilot in question. His heroics in the first World War 1 had been so well known, an airport in his hometown was named after him (current day: rat [email protected] changed the name TxT). His accomplishment was long and renown, however this wasn’t the main focus on this situation right now.

He was just having a stroll by the Dunkerque Beach shores, some distance away from the local base he was stationed at. There were maidens, scattered all over the beaches. All of then were either naked, had fish tails, or were turning into sea creatures like seals, otters, salmon, to even tuna. And there was a mystical full moon, the light really emphasized their 'many features'. The Pilot looked at them with the eyes of a curious gentlemen. The Witches all stared at him with the eyes of sailors who have been out in sea for too long.

“Oh sh*t. I-I didn't think of the opposite effect! GET OUT OF HERE, RAY-RAY! BEFORE THE GIRLS ALL MARCH AFTER YOU LIKE ZOMBIES IN AN APOCOLYPSE!”

“I see now. So it’s not just the men who go crazy at the first sight of a girl. It’s also the same in reverse.”

“SO WHY THE H*LL AREN’T YOU RUNNING FROM A STAMPEDE OF BOY-CRAZED WITCHES!?!?”

As much as the circumstances should be more like ‘KYAA! PERVERT ON THE NUDE BEACH!’ ‘DEATH TO STALKERS!’, the reaction was rather the opposite, or flipside. All the Witches who were part of the anti-U Boat program defensive charged to this Canadian Pilot. As if he was the last sardine to a flock of seagulls.

“No! G-get away from him! R-Ray-Ray is my war partner! H-he’s exclusive to me! Me only! Gah! How long have these idiot women not seen a man! They’re not listening to ration or reason! Kkkkkkk! GET THE F**K OFF HIM, YOU B*TCHES! HE’S MY HUSBAND!!”

“No. I’m not. I’m still single.”

“D-DON’T JUST UP AND SAY THAT IN FRONT OF 150 WITCHES LIKE THAT! NYAAAAAH! THIS [email protected] SWORD FISH TAIL IS WEIGHING ME DOWN! I CAN’T STOP THESE OBSSESSED WOMEN! NO! DON’T ASK HIM FOR HIS PHONE NUMBER! REMEMBER RAY-RAY! NAME – RANK – AND SERIAL NUMBER ONLY!”

“Flight Lieutenant Raymond Collishaw. Royal Naval Air Service (now: Royal Air Force), Canadian Regiment. Serial Number N533-26A1. My hobbies are fly fishing, painting, plane repair, and swimming. My favorite music is jazz.”

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOO OOOOOO! DON’T STEAL MY HUSBAND! DON'T STEAL MY HUSBAAAAAAAND!”

For the record, Raymond Collishaw was married to Juaneita Eliza 'Neita' Trapp, in Mayfair England July 14, 1923. And no, this Canadian Witch was not his mistress. Not historically. 

"Sob...Sob...My darling...my soul mate... Don't take him away from meeeee...Sob."