I woke up on carpet so soft that for a moment I thought I was still dreaming. The carpet was white, the ceiling was white, the blanket stretched over me was white, but my head felt grey like a storm.

I stretched my arms. The room smelt good, like rose or strawberries.

‘Morning.’

I sat up quickly, someone sat in the bed next to me, and that someone wasn’t Ayamin.

Long, brown flecked hair. A foreign face. Where was she from? Britain? Scandinavia? Germany?

You’re an idiot I told myself.

‘Rough night?’ she said in an accent that screamed Northern England.

I peered down at myself. I was naked from the waist up but thank goodness I still had chinos on. Still, I almost slapped myself in the face. How am I going to explain this to Ayamin?

‘Good morning,’ I said, watching her watching me. There was this awkward silence, I didn’t know what to say to her and she didn’t seem to know what to say to me. I wanted to ask about the night before but I was a little afraid.

‘Who’s Ayamin?’ she asked.

I opened my mouth but didn’t speak. I wanted to say that she was my girlfriend, travel buddy, partner. But I didn’t know if that was true anymore.

The British girl hugged her pillow, ‘Just the way you said her name… seems like you care about her a lot.’

I nodded, ‘Ummm… Did we do anything last night?’

The girl laughed, it was a nice laugh, full of colour, ‘No, you wouldn’t even let me kiss you. When I tried you were all… Ayamin this… Ayamin that.’

I let out a breath, at least I hadn’t made it worse for myself.

She looked a little sad, ‘Why did you break up? I’d love someone as fit, tanned, and wholesome as you.’

‘I’m not so sure wholesome should be on that list,’ I shrugged, ‘I’ve been lying to her since we met.’

‘Oh… what about?’

This British girl seemed nice and all, but I found myself wondering, What am I doing here? Why am I talking to her?

I shrugged, looked up at the clock that sat on her wall, ‘I should get going.’

‘Are you sure? Do you want to grab some breakfast first?’

Despite the groan of my stomach, I shook my head, ‘I’ve got somewhere to be.’