When I first opened the browser I was astonish to see such a hidden gem, so I added her as a friend. After a few minutes later, I was notified. I was surprise that she accepted it. I was like

“Why the hell would add me? I am like the last person you should add.“

“Are you fucking stupid or something?” I told myself

So the time pass by after boasting to myself how awesome I am. I tried chatting with her, I opened up her chat box, the second I opened it, I started doing jumping jacks, then `push ups. I said to myself “just needed a little warm up, with a warmed up body I started to type the word“HI” and hit enter.

As I hit enter I took a cigarette out of my bag and lit it. A minute passed and she still has not replied yet,

I was panicking before I could notice it, the pack of cigarettes I had was already empty, and I was saying to myself “what the fuck? Why won’t you reply? Am I hopeless? I suck. God why did you create me?”

After badmouthing myself, I decided to buy more cigs at the store outside my house. I was shock to see upon my return I got a reply from her saying “hello” I could hear heavenly trumpets blowing resonating in the room. My heart pounded so heavy that time.

A minute or two passed, when I replied with” How was your day?” before I hit enter I studied every inch of this sentence I was like Sherlock holmes, figuring out what would happen if I would respond with this message. I finally gave up and pressed enter.

Feelings of anxiety started to fill me up, as I read her reply “it was alright, hbu?” at that time I was not accustomed to reading shorten words. Therefore, I did not know what ‘hbu’ stands for

So i relied upon my instincts, and typed “not much, just chillin at my room. So how are you adjusting to our school?”

***************

Ok, you caught me, I confess, I might maybe possibly have looked her up a little bit. I just got to know that she was a transferee from another school and she just moved to this town, other details included her birthday, mother’s name, father’s name, what are things did she liked and movies and songs she like, and maybe a lot more stuff about her.

However, of course I pretended I did not know those stuff. Duh! For conversation starters

Returning to the story, after a while she replied with “its ok, still trying to get used to being here, I kind of miss my old town but I’m totally fine being here”

I was surprised to see such a long reply, I was expecting her reply would be “why do you know I came from another town? Are you stalking me? Don’t talk to me again?”

Was I over exaggerating, No, It was normal for a girl to think that to a person they have not met?

I thought to myself, “man, this girl is weird, I need stop replying to her” but my body could not stop.

Subconsciously, while I was thinking, my body replied to her with “Ohhh, so why did you move then?”

Surprised by my reply, I was thinking, “OH shit, Fuck man, am I getting to close to this girl? I look like a total stalker right now, Fuck! I want to die! Kill me please!”

While hitting myself I heard the sound of my laptop getting a reply. I stop what was I doing and, checked on her reply.

I was so happy to see her reply was not bad. She said, “Family problems, my parents got a divorce; I was forced to leave my mom so I could live with my dad,”

The message sounded sad so I quickly played sad music on my music player to connect to the topic.

I replied with “oh sorry, I didn’t mean to bring that up”. Her reply was “Nah, it’s cool; it doesn’t really bother me that much anymore”

At this moment I felt like a fucking genius, I never felt so smart, this long in our conversation still the girl was still replying, I was so happy, I never felt so smart before, replying to her like some kind of dating god. Comforting her and saying complements to her.

It all came so natural to me as if god himself blessed me; it felt the Holy Spirit was controlling my hand. It was like all the great poets guiding me. Shakespeare, Socrates, the marquis de Sade was at my side. Whispering to my ear their expertise in courting the opposite sex.

After a while, she and I started to talk about our school,

We were not at the same class and we were not at the same grade. I was a little older than she was.

However, the school we were in was small so it was easy to get to know other people there; we only had one section for each individual Grade.

We were asking each other about our classmates and stuff,

I was surprised to know that she already knew a few of my classmates. When I asked why she knew them.

She replied with “Clubs”

Then I ask asked “oh so what club are you in?”

With that, she went offline, without replying to me,

My heart was torn, I felt I was used to pass the time.

It was like I was nothing to her, like trash thrown away, like a tissue after used thrown at the trash bid.

I felt broken and abandoned, “why the fuck did she do this to me? After the four hours we spent together chatting, I thought we had something.WHY?”