Vestige Chapter 5 - Elusive Memories

“You seriously don’t remember Kata?” Jax tied a bandage around his bleeding calf. I stood up and left the chair I was in. Around me, a strange lab erupted into view. Equipment littered the stone walls and floor.

“I don’t know anyone named that.” Puzzled, I replied. Where would Jax have met anyone named Kata? We’ve never left the orphanage before this, and there has never been a kid named Kata there before.

“Are you kidding me?!” Jax stomped his foot into the ground. “You grew up with Kata! You spent your entire life with her! You, Aurelia and her have done everything together! How have you forgotten that?!”

I can’t describe the feeling of confusion I feel before me. My mind drew a blank on the name and yet Jax seemed so passionate about this person.

“Calm down Jax.” Aurelia cooled his temper. “Give Lulu some space, she must have gone through a lot. Just be glad she’s okay. We can figure this out later. Everything is going to be alright.”

"I'm so relieved you're alright. I really thought I lost you." Aurelia attempted to help me walk, but I shrugged her off. My legs feel perfectly fine, stronger even. My arm doesn’t hurt anymore and I can even move it again. I can sense power flowing through me, strangely.

I turned my attention to Sayako, who was sitting at the edge of the room, tied up. Blood flowed from her legs onto the floor and her eyes met mine.

“Maybe you’ve got something to say about this.” Jax confronted to Sayako. He ripped off the duct tape on her mouth and pinned his pistol to her head.

“What have you done to Lulu?” He demanded.

Sayako forlornly gazed at him.

“Standard procedure. After a child contains the serum’s power, we erase their memories of the orphanage and the serum. Then they are taken away. I’m sorry, but I didn’t entirely finish the process on Lulu, so there's no saying what memories she’s lost.”

“Damn, so bring her memories back then!” Jax rammed his pistol into her skull.

“I’m sorry.” Sayako looked down to the ground. “We don’t have the ability to restore memories, only erase and change. Lulu’s memories of Kata are gone. I can’t just bring that back.”

Jax sighed and tightened his grip. “Whatever, just tell me where you took Kata last night then!”

“Last night I handed her over to the other division. They likely took her to the capital.”

“Where the hell is the capital then?! Don't waste my time!” Jax yelled.

“I’m really sorry Jax, I don’t know. I’ve never left the walls. I’ve only peeked at the outside world. I can't help you.” Sayako sighed. “No amount of apologizing will ever remedy the pain I’ve caused you, children. I was always so scared of the system. I was always scared of being taken away like the others who failed the test were. I’m even selfish enough to put others through torture just so I don’t have to.” Sayako monologued.

Jax took his pistol away from Sayako’s head.

“I realize now that I’ve been an awful mother.” Sayako continued. “I was sure of myself that the world couldn’t be changed. I was sure that we were all going to be killed just for trying. I let that consume me and take over my everyday life. Every decision I ever made was based on my resolve to be in the grace of the higher ups. I let it blind me.” Sayako coughed onto the floor. A splat of blood laid in its wake.

“Mother!” Aurelia rushed over to Sayako. “She’s bleeding really badly!”

“I watched resistance fail. I stumped it out myself too.” Sayako began to cough more rapidly. “I even attempted to stop you, my own children, from accomplishing their dreams. I’ve realized now the errors in my ways.”

The puddle of blood on the floor grew huge. It soaked into Jax’s boots. It stained Aurelia’s clothes. “I can’t stop the bleeding!” Aurelia cried. She tied bandages and applied pressure but to no avail.

Jax stared at Sayako speechless.

“I’m so proud of you four. You’ve done so well stopping me. I hope you can forgive me for everything I’ve done.” Sayako reached out of her bindings and pulled out a keycard. She tossed it over the large puddle of blood and near Jax’s feet.

“This is the least I can do. I’ve failed as a caregiver. I’ve failed as your mother, Lulu.” Sayako took one last look at me. “But you, my children, are stronger than I ever was. Take that card. Go on and leave this damned place. Find happiness outside the walls.” Sayako’s lungs crawled to a halt and her heart played its final note.

A moment of silence and stillness spread through the room. We were all struck for words. The realization that we had killed our own mother sank deep in our hearts. What little she said had a profound impact on me. The happiness she spoke of alluded beyond what I ever imagined. Our whole lives have been lies, but out there, somewhere, is a place of happiness. A place where we can live in peace, all of us

“Let’s get going.” Jax broke the silence. “We’re never gonna find the capital sulking around like this.”

“We’re not going to the capital.” I interjected.

“What?” Jax responded.

Sayako didn’t give us that card so we could live peace ourselves. She wanted us to free everyone with it. She wanted us to break out every child stuck in this purgatory. I’m going to save Sharlotte, Glenda, and all the others.

“We need to go back. We’re going to get everyone in the orphanage and escape together. I’m not going to leave my family behind.” I explained.

“But you’d leave Kata behind? She’s probably being tortured in the capital as we speak! You’d ignore that just to bring fifty people along with us?” Jax argued and waved his pistol through the air.

“I never said that-”

“And how the hell do you expect to escape with everyone? Do you really think running away is going to be easy? There will people who will try to stop us, kill us even! How are we going to survive that with a group of fifty people? Many of them are still kids, toddlers even! They can't defend themselves! They'll slow us down!”

“That doesn’t change the fact we can’t just abandon them here! They’re all at risk right now! We’ve got to do something to save them.”

Jax let out a huge sigh. “I agree with you, but it’s not that simple. We don’t know what it’s like outside. I’d rather break everyone out if I knew I had somewhere to bring them.”

Jax reached his hand out. “How about this. Let's leave the walls. We'll explore the outside world and find a safe haven for ourselves. Then we'll go back for everyone. Trying to leave with everyone like that’s riskier than just leaving them here. Even without Mom, they'll be just fine here.” He offered.

I guess he’s right. I can’t let anyone else die. Running away with that many people won’t be easy. So many of them just aren't old enough for something like this. There's no saying how many would die along the way. We’ll just have to find a sanctuary first and then we’ll save our whole family.

Engrossed with a desire to find heaven and filled with the memory of the people we left behind, we set off. Sayako, no, Mother’s last words struck a chord in all of us. We were going to find somewhere safe for everyone. We were going to find a paradise where we could all be happy.