Now I have no ear to listen to what I wanted to say. My son had gone to visit some place that I didn’t even know name of. And he ain't coming back from now. Joey had called me two days ago and had said he has abandoned me. He didn’t give any reasons for doing so. I think I never had given him any reason for doing so. Haaa…I think I can live without him. I will also live without my grandson. Joey must have abandoned me because of his bitch wife. Damn slut! How could Joey marry her?

There is no point in lamentation, or is there? I hope…

I recalled the time of wars. I remembered how I felt when I had walked in and walked out of first war I had ever been in.

But in second day of being left alone, I figured out surviving alone looked, now, more difficult than to survive in the war. In wars you have weapons to defend yourself. In life your body is your shield. And I am no more a healthy person but a fragile arthritic senior citizen.

I didn’t watch TV for the evening. I had some old magazines and newspapers which I had collected during my time in army. I flipped those pages one by one, checked each photo and tried to remember each of the faces on it.

Half of them had died in war and the rest were nowhere to be found. I slammed the pile of magazines and turned pages so that I would not get bored. I didn’t know when I had finished two of them. And I also didn't get to know when I had gulped last sip of my wine in glass.

I saw some kids down in the street. I watched them play and leave. The one particular toddler looked no older than ten and behaved in the same way. I got off my chair and walked towards barricade of the balcony. I put his hand on cold bar, wrapped it by my wrinkled palm and felt odd. I looked down. There is solution to every problem, isn’t it?

I can end my sufferings here. I look down and can't get thought of jumping from there off my mind. I am a frail old man. I would die the moment I hit the ground.

I wonder if I should jump or not for next five minutes.

Some other day. I told myself. Being left alone wasn’t the reason I am meant to die for. I have survived wars and even a bullet. I should not meet such fate just because of the people who have left me.

I look back and think forward for another day when arthritis wouldn’t hurt this much. I take few steps to get inside my room.

"Hey! You can't leave! You cannot." I hear a toddler ride on his bicycle. For a moment I had thought the kid was telling me.

The child pedaled his bicycle as much as he could and past my house.

"Wait! You cannot go." Toddler screamed again and went out of my weak sight.

I waited there for another hour. Many kids returned pedaling but the one whom I was curious about didn’t return.

I have poor eyesight. I told myself and left the balcony.