《A Portal Fantasy Comedy Poem》Merlin and the Power of Positive Thinking
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23
Before Mary and Anna leave Utopia
A boy with a big grey beard appears in their way
He squints at then as though he has myopia
He says, "Hold on, Mary, I have something to say"
He Wears a conical hat with starry display
And he holds a staff so tall that it's twice his height
of one meter, And neat blue robes that have no fray
"Pray tell, Merlin," says she. "Spit it out, I won't bite
"You have gifted me with so much of your insight
And you taught me so much magic, and science too”
Merlin doffs his hat with a smile, says "Quite alright.
I just wanted to make sure you know your spells true"
"I do," says Mary, "there's no time for a review
My magical spells sing true, just like you taught me
Except my fireball, instead of red, shoots blue
Everything else comes out right, I can guarantee"
"That's good," says Merlin, "Now go onwards and be free
Remember, on yellow road you must always stay
If you encounter danger of great degree, flee
for your life. Leave everything and run far away."
"I'll remember," Mary makes Merlin's fears allay.
The two girls begin their great journey at long last
All their goodbyes they ask Merlin to go relay
They walk a vast distance, and soon stop for breakfast
"Remember," says Mary, " we want to reach there fast
Tell yourself in your head we'll be there in a week
The magic of positive thinking we will cast
'Tis a strange magic, surrounded by much mystique"
They then reach a vast desert where the mice do squeak
Snakes and insects hiss and bzz beside the brick road
Anna, despite her positive thinking, feels weak
She screams when she sees across the road jump a toad
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This toad is just as big as her former abode
It swims not in water but in hot desert sand
Mary, " Wonder if it can be cooked a la mode
Once the cooks have removed the poisonous gland
Anna feels choked, "I've had it with this desert land
It's so hot, horrible and filled with horrid things
Magic me back home please, no I must now demand!
The Viscount was just about to give me a ring"
Mary sighs, " Forget about home, just spread your wings
I know that this land is monotonous and dull
But we are like puppets in this, to Fate's long strings
Oh look, I think I can see a giant's big skull
All your negative thoughts you really need must cull
Just think that we are flying in a cool spring breeze
I know this is trying, you’d rather be in Mull
But we really have to meet up with the Chinese
Reality here: half illusion, Socrates
told me in Utopia. It is called Maya
By an Indian who had certain expertise.
He pondered for ages on the Himalayas
This is a dimension that's not born of Gaia
This is a higher plane where very few can die
So be brave, keep a stiff upper lip I tell ya
Please do not sniff like that, you will make yourself cry”
24
They walk for hours, hours and some more hours
"Oh look," says Anna, those rocks look just like faces
Is it because of the way the wind devours"
"It's the human mind that shows these facial traces,"
says Mary, "It is not the wind in these cases
Humans seek meaning in everything we observe
Especially in the most bizarre realms or places
A man called Rorschach showed all this on a bell curve
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I met him in Utopia, He struck a nerve
Looking for the patterns in all of my freckles
All these scientist types really have no reserve
Except for those folk who only mess with metals"
Anna, "Oh! Look at those rocks, they look like devils
And those past there, they really look like woolly sheep
They are so life like that it really is mental
To think it's just mind patterns that we see and keep"
Mary, "Those really are sheep in that sandy heap
Shorty told me there's an annual Lamboree
Taking place over here in the desert so deep;
That we'd come across it, I never did foresee
"What do they do in Lamboree, in this sand sea,"
Asks Anna. She looks at the sheep curiously.
Mary, “They talk bout wool and grass, and shady trees
Butchers too, if this one is a war Lamboree
Now don't mention mutton or chops, seriously
Until we are clear of all of these sheep and goats"
Wind changes direction, and inadvertently
carries the M word to the goats from Mary's throat
Goats and sheep turn to them and stare a lethal dose
Of such overwhelming hatred, rage and anger
Mary, " this will make such a funny anecdote
Run, run, run at a speed faster than a canter!
"Phew," says Anna, relieved when the goats meander
"Looks like they're finally giving up on the chase
We're really lucky to escape in this manner"
"Not so lucky," a mysterious man's voice states
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