This is the problem with getting attached to someone

When they leave.. You just feel lost

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I took deep breath in and walked over to my closet grabbing a pair of jeans. I slipped them on slowly my hands shook as i tried buttoning them and zipping them up. My phone rang and I grabbed it looking at the text.

I’m leaving tonight at 6 if ur coming with i'll be at Jewell

I threw the phone onto the bed not even wanting to think about leaving… but what if leaving was the best thing i could do for lindsey, what if she gets hurt because of me.. A knock on my door pulled me out of my thoughts.

“Come in” I said turned away from the door.

“Hey..” Chelsi’s voice broke the silence between us as she sat on my bed.

“I'm going to the hospital, and was wondering if you wanted a ride?” she was quiet as she sad there waiting for my answer.

“Sure i said sliding a grey long sleeve on over my head.

“I'll be down stairs for when you're ready” she said and stood up leaving my room. I don't remember putting my shoes on or even walking down the stairs but suddenly i was in the dining room everyone's eyes were on me.

“Zeke would you like some breakfast?” Ms. Lane said standing up from her spot at the table.

“No thanks” I said looking at my shoes.

“Zeke you need something in your system, you stayed up till at least 2 and you woke up at six, you need something to eat” Alex said looking at me

“I'm not hungry, chelsi are you ready” I asked snapping my head towards her.

“Ye.. yeah” she said standing up walking out of the door to her car. I followed her and we drove to the hospital, even though it was early the parking lot was still packed as we tried to find a place to park. When we walked into Lindsey's hospital room her parents were still there drinking hospital coffee, my throat immediately dried up as i looked at her still sleeping.

“H..Has she woken up?” I asked quietly. Her mother looked into her lap shaking her head softly. I quickly walked out of the room and retraced my footsteps and walked into the bathroom. Leaning against the counter where the sinks were placed. My arms shook barley supporting my weight. The bathroom door creaked open as a little boy walked into the bathroom he looked at me standing just a little bit from the door.

“Why are you here mister?” he asked sweetly looking at me walking over to the sink.

“My girlfriend got hit by a car and is now here.” I said quietly looking at him.

“Why are you here? “ I asked standing up straight.

“My dad got shot in the leg, he's a police officer” He said proudly.

“He's a lucky man to have a caring son like you” I said smiling softly.

“Do you love her?”

“Huh?”

“Do you love your girlfriend?”

“Yes, I love her alot actually”

“Then go, she needs you now” He said then happily left the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror one last time and walked back to Lindsey's room. Only her mom was in there now as she sat by Lindsey's bed side, her eyes red from the lack of sleep and tears.

“Mrs. Shay…” She looked up at me

“Please go home and rest, i'll be here for her” I said putting my hand on her shoulder. SHe nodded and stood up grabbing her purse and leaving the room but not before she kissed lindsey on the forehead. I sat down in the chair next to lindsey, She laid there quietly dreaming of her own world the nurse came into the room with a new glass of water and some flowers.

“E.. excuse me, do you think i could have a piece of paper and a pen?” I asked slowly looking at the nurse she smiled and nodded and left the room. A few minutes later she came back in with a piece of notebook paper and a pen.

“Thank you” I said as she left, I sat at the table looking a t the piece of paper.

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Time flew by as i stared at the piece of paper writing on it every so often. It was going on 5 when i stopped writing I folded up the piece of paper and put it in her flower vase. My throat was dry and my eyes threatened to fill up with tears as i sat next to lindsey on her bed.

“I love you Lindsey” I whispered kissing her lips softly standing up. I closed my eyes and turned around leaving her room, I walked down the hall leaving, Isaac was waiting at Jewel like he said he would be.

“So you decided to show?” Isaac said as I approached the car he was leaning against.

“..Yeah” i said throwing my bag of clothes from the house on the ground.

“Who's that?” I asked pointing at the woman who was sitting in the car.

“That is our new roomate, Rey this is Zeke”

“Isaac what's going on here?”

“Zeke you and I are on parole, we can't just up and leave Bend, we need to stay here.”

“So you're telling me.. I just up and left my girlfriend, my family my life! To just stay in Bend!!”

“Yes….. but, you won't hurt them if you're not with them” He said slowly. I grab my hair and pull slightly taking in a deep breath.

“Fine, let's go” I said getting in the back seat of the tan car.

Lindseys P.O.V.

My throat was dry and my body ached, my eyes were blinded by the fluorescent light of the hospital room. I looked to my right at the empty chair. I slowly cranked my head to the left at the glass of water, my arm slowly reached for it as I grabbed it and drank the water.

“Ah Ms. Shay you're awake” A nurse said walking in the the room with a clip board.

“I have a question?” I asked looking at her.

“Yes?”

“Was there a guy, about my age in her, tall, black hair?”

“Yes actually and he asked for a piece of paper and a pen, but before your parents got back he was leaving the hospital.”

“Thank you” I said and after that she left the room. My eyes fell on a flower vase next to me, I reached over and grabbed a piece of paper tucked into the side, it was addressed to me.

Lindsey, you are the light of my dark life, i felt like I could come to you for anything the second I met you. You make me laugh and smile and feel like I can face the world around me because i was with you, you made me feel normal, like 3 years ago I didn't kill a man I was just a normal guy who went all throughout High School who went through his life, but that's not who I am, I’m a murder and as long as people are looking for me and i'm putting you in risk i'm sorry but I can't do that I can't put you in risk Lindsey… So I have to say goodbye for now, please don't hate me

I love you -Zeke

My eyes watered up as I read it, it felt like part of me was ripped out, as if the world around me stopped, not in a good way as if my heart was ripped out of me and I was dying. It was getting harder for me to breath as i tried to choke back the tears. He left me….. He actually left me