“Hear the song of my people!”

A guy in a rockstar outfit shouted and strung the strings of his red rock guitar. Above him the “HearMePlebeians” Lvl 2” can be seen. A mismatch tune started to play; a slow moving light came from the guitar and attacked a goblin.

Attack [-2]

The surrounding Goblins laughed at the menial attack that the rockstar made.

“fsfhsfhskfh!”

One of the goblins tried to mimic the attack of the player and its peers kept on laughing.

The rockstar outfit guy slowly walked towards one of the laughing goblins.

“It seems that the melody of my people didn’t reach you. So, let me instill it to you.” He started to raise the guitar upward.

“THHHWAK.” [-8]

A gruesome sound made when the guitar hit the Goblin’s head.

“Not laughing now are we?” The rock guitar hero maniacally laughed as he kept on hitting the heads of the goblins. “ORA! ORA! ORA!”

The goblins growled and began to attack the player “HearMePlebeians”.

“Let me help.” A guy in colorful dancing clothes started moving his feet. A north and south neon colored tiles hitting the zombies.

[-4] [-3] [-4]

One person started singing horribly while banging his head back and forth. The goblins began to put their hands over their ears to block out the “music”.

A guy behind a drum set began slamming the drumsticks against the drums while throwing a drumstick once in a while. “Take these suckers!”

[-5]

The goblins were over powered.

“Deym. This is when internet people goes to afterlife, eh?” Luke said.

“What’s wrong with your Generation?” Grandpa asked, pointing out the massacre scene in front of them.

“He’s not from my Generation, Gramps.” Mark said.

Grandpa looked at Luke.

”Hey! Don’t look at me. I don’t know him.” Luke said.

“This is fun.” Alek recording the whole session with his videocamera.

“Anyone want some tea?” Grandma offered to them.

They are currently sitting on a looking like having a picnic. Unbeknownst to the people around them, they were observing how the fighting system works. They had to do it, because they have him- a person who hadn’t played for ten years, and two grandparents who don’t play games much before.

Mark sipped the hot cup of tea. Grandma took a thermos with them. Now he knew what it was for. Honestly, he didn’t mind. The tea tasted great.

“Are those the Marching Band Team?” The voice behind them said. “Dang’ it. I don’t wanna be near them. Team, let’s go on the other side.”

A group of armor clad people walked to their left side. Completely ignoring the massacre of the group of goblins in front of them.

“We should also go to the floors where there are few players to level up.” Luke pointed out. “There are a lot of people here to level up.”

A Goblin with staff suddenly blew a horn.

“Kraaaaakzhhfittt” Random words were spewing by the goblin. Mark understood it.

“Hey! Marching Band it’s summoning something!” he called out the dork group. The group taken stopped hitting the goblins and looked at him in a surprise.

“What? Who are you?” The drummer guy asked.

The Goblin Mage hit its staff on the ground. The cave surrounding them started to vibrate. The Marching Band take on its defense.

“Get ready! He’s right. The ugly thing is doing something!” The drummer shouted.

“Did the Guides say anything about this?” Mark asked Luke. “There must be something written about this on the Guide.”

“Let me see.” Luke opened The Ultimate Monster Nope-Fest Guide Volume I book.

“Anything yet? The Goblin might attack us anytime now.” He said looking at a dark spikey head getting out from the ground.

“Here.” Luke stated. Alek went to see the book through his videocamera. “It says here; get the fuck out of there.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah. It say’s here.” Alek confirmed looking at the page. “The Goblin Mage summoned if feel threatened. If you’re level 5 below, please get the fuck out of there.”

“Well, that means let’s pack up and get out of here.” Grandpa said, standing up. He looked to his right where his summoned cards are. “Help us, you two.”

The card with ace of hearts approached Grandma and helped her fold the blankets.

“Thank you, dear.” Grandma said to the cards, and sighed. “Where do we go now?”

“Let us where the other players went.” Alek suggested. “It’s over there.”

They looked at their left where the team previously went.

“AAAAAHHH HELP US!” Several echoes can be heard from the distance.

"Or not." Luke said upon hearing the echoes of the dying people.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea to go there, guys.” Alek zooming in the cave. “There are a dozen of level 3 Goblins there. They might kill us on the spot.”

They looked at each other. Lost at what to do.

“Isn’t it more dangerous we don’t know how to fight?” Luke reasoned. “Should we try practicing on whatever that thing is summoning?”

“GGGGGGGAAARRRGGGGHHHH!”

Three level 7 wolves appeared. They started growling menacingly against the Marching Band Team.

“jshjkdhfksfh!” The Goblin Mage pointed to its enemies. The three started attacking the Marching Band Team. The other goblins started attacking also. The Goblin Mage put up his staff and started chanting. The goblins were enveloped by a green light and their wounds disappeared.

“We can do this! No one can stop our passion for music!” HearMePleabians shouted.

“Yeah!”

“Let’s rock and roll dudes!”

The mismatched tune gotten louder.

Their monitors showed up:

Your comrades are happy and energized. You feel the energy of their shared music.

Defense [+2]

“We’ve been affected by their passive ability.” Alek said while looking at his own Menu.

He looked at the Marching Band Team. They were being bitten by the summoned wolves. The Rockstar kept on hitting the grey one latched on its right foot.

“I think we should help them.” Mark suggested. “We can overwhelm the goblins by our sheer numbers.”

They all nodded.

“How do we attack- was it?” Grandpa asked.

“Swing your sword, Gramps. It’s like real life. Then, there will be numbers appearing it means that will be the damage taken by the enemy.” Luke explained while swinging his crappy sword.

Grandpa nodded. “All right I can do that. Menu. Items.”

Mark also took out the Shoddy Sword and Shoddy Shield and equipped them from his items.

The Beginners Blessing

You’ve equipped the 2 pieces of Shoddy Equipment.

The Beginner Swordsmith can feel that you’ve used his equipment and felt elated. As a thanks, he gives this blessing to you.

Defense [+1]

Attack [+1]

Note: Can only be activated when equipped.

“Minimize.” He looked at his team. The others equipped their swords and ready to go.

“All righty. Let’s help them.”

They ran to the side of the Marching Band.

“Hey! We’re here to help!” Luke shouted at the team.

The Goblin Mage realized this and looked afraid. It tried hitting the ground but no wolf came.

“Thanks!” The drummer said while his eyes still on the goblins. “It looks like it’s out of mana.”

Grandma took a swing of her sword and hit the grey wolf. [ -5] The grey wolf whimpered and let the guy go from his hold.

“Okay. Let me try.” Mark said, swinging the shoddy sword at the incoming wolf.

“Tooot”

[-1]

“That was your attack sound? It sounds like someone tried farted silently” HearMePlebeians observed.

“Shuddup!” His ears began to turn red. “I’m just warming up.”

I’m weak. He looked at his sword. It really is a trash sword.

He glanced the Marching Band Team attacking. Maybe, I’m not suitable for sword fighting?

He looked at the orb beside him. I’m pretty sure this was attacking when I played the game last time. Does it have a menu or something? I can’t remember.

“All right. Let’s do this!” Luke announced, running towards the scared Goblin Mage. “We need to take this one out first.”

Luke started swinging his sword against the Goblin Mage. [-8] [-7] [-9]

“Kwaaak.”

The Goblin Mage made a gurgling sound. It grasped its own neck and was breathing heavily.

All stood still. The remaining goblins were confused and tried to help the mage.

[-15]

“That was my skill.” Alek stated. “If you look at my videocamera, you will see hands strangling the goblin.”

“What a nasty skill.” The drummer dude with “iHitSplendidly Lvl 2.” Inscription said.

“Hey! It’s better than nothing.” Alek said, embarrassed.

The Goblin Mage made a dying sound and stopped moving.

Defeated [+25 Exp]

“Ho!” Grandpa looked impressed. “Let me try.”

He slowly walked in the direction of the goblins and swung his sword against the neck on his right. [-15]

Defeated [+10 Exp]

Its decapitated head rolled towards the other goblins. Effectively, The Marching Band cheered when they saw the moves that Grandpa did.

“We’re saved!”

“Now, that’s a kill.”

“Gramps, join our team!”

“We’re here too, you know.” Luke said.

“They can’t hear you.” Alek said.

“Gramps is strong. I thought he only played Online Solitaire?” He expressed his thoughts.

“Beats me.” Luke sighed, staring at Grandpa while he decapitate the goblins one by one. "But, one thing's for sure; that's one of a hell of a Solitaire, Bro."