From: Kamal E Y [email protected]>

To: Sabrina [email protected] >

Sent: 15 September, 1999 02:08 PM

Subject: Don't be scared and don't worry

Dearest Sabrina,

I sent an mail to you yesterday. Didn't you get it, honey? I thought you got the mail. Otherwise, I would have surely called. Don't be scared, I am always with you.

I was confused by the mails you were sending for the past few days. I wasn't able to answer your questions satisfactorily. Yesterday I thought of those things. I think I can answer then now.

Firstly, did I do my best to get my old girlfriend? I have to say we tried out best. But at that age, we were only 20, just past the teenage. We were not able to think independently. We were dependent on and afraid of our parents. We can just run away from them, once I get a job, we knew, but that will hurt our parents. So the only thing we can do to make others happy is to hurt ourselves. We did that. Everyone except us two was happy. Our life was the only thing we could play with. We played with that. We were badly hurt, but we didn't hurt anyone else. At that time we were just college kids, not knowing what to do. So we parted.

Second question, why don't I go to her now? Before answering that I have to ask you a question. Do you want me to do that? Tell me honestly.

Of course, I can go and call her. But then again, I don't want to do it. We decided to part and took all the hurt ourselves, why again start everything? The question of hurt will come again. No, I don't want to do that. I regard that as a closed chapter.

Did I answer all your questions correctly? If not, ask me again. I will try to find out the answers.

And don't be scared, sweetheart, I am always with you. If I was there I would have hugged you and help you close to my heart to let you know my heartbeat. To feel your heart beating... I know it is difficult to console you sitting so far away... But we have to...our love is on the rough always. But we will see what we can do. We tow against the whole world... I can take the challenges if you are beside me. Don't worry too. Now, give me a sweet smile, OK? Oh, damn! I am so far away!!

Ok, you tell me about Valentine's Day only after we meet each other and after making love. I will wait for that. But then, with nothing to separate me from you, you will have to tell. I never suspected your virginity. I had always believed that all these 31 years, that has been saved for me. I will make the first blood from your hymen. Otherwise, why did we meet after such a long time and so far away?

Are you OK now? No worries and no fears. OK? I am yours and you are mine...with thousands of kisses...

Yours only

Kamal