Yahoo Messenger: 23 August 2000 11:02 PM

Subject: where there is a will, there is a way

julietscity: we only have 30 minutes...

romeobanglore: yessssss

romeobanglore: let us not think about that

julietscity: I miss you...I know you may won't believe it

julietscity: what's that?

julietscity: Oh...that!

romeobanglore: I too miss you...the mails which opened my days

julietscity: stubborn woman

romeobanglore: but I know your mind

julietscity: no...you don't know that much

julietscity: you have a good personality, you won't know how I think

julietscity: connection problem again? We don't have enough time, goodness!!!

romeobanglore: when you become angry, I can see you through your anger

romeobanglore: I think I know how you think

julietscity: this time may be angry, but not that all...

romeobanglore: so when u tell me something...I see through to the real reason

julietscity: I have started preparing for worse situations

romeobanglore: what is the worse situation?

julietscity: Are you always so confident?

julietscity: You make me think about the ending more

julietscity: You never worry or... if you worry I don't know... or nobody knows

romeobanglore: that ending has always hurt me and gave me lot of pressure

julietscity: I hope the stress is happening now ... our common goal is to live together as soon as possible

romeobanglore: I want to take care of you...even if we couldn't be together...that's why I told you all about that

julietscity: I need you to pick me up...I want to take care of you toooooooooooooooooooooo

romeobanglore: to get hurt now... I was ready, if you decided to go for a new life

julietscity: YES!!! but hurry UP

romeobanglore: I will pick you up and put you in our bed and hold you close to my chest

julietscity: I don't want that "will"... I want it to happen sooner and earlier than next year

romeobanglore: that is possible...but we will be not so good for us

romeobanglore: because I want to have a good job... not just any job

julietscity: You always want me to make a decision, because you always want to be a nice guy in everything

romeobanglore: so that we two can live together with comfort and pride

romeobanglore: because my decision is dependent on you

julietscity: before you find a good job as your wish, then we might bye bye...do you ever think of it?

julietscity: NO...I ever asked you to make decision...but you couldn't do it...so I did

romeobanglore: I don't think so...moreover...next year is not that far away

julietscity: for me it's toooo far...away...

julietscity: I don't know why I can't wait

romeobanglore: honey... I know how it feels...but we will make it

julietscity: when I see closer contact between people ... or kissing on TV or movies ... you know what I think ... you're not here ....

julietscity: "Will" again...

romeobanglore: it is the same for me too

julietscity: I want to touch you every minute...

romeobanglore: where there is a will, there is a way

romeobanglore: I too

julietscity: I hope you are by my side every morning when you wake up in bed

romeobanglore: I want to feel you when I go to bed

julietscity: There are 4 months left from next week!

romeobanglore: yes...please wait...for me

julietscity: Not talking or answering this week... a bad punishment for myself

julietscity: I make the punishment for myself

romeobanglore: you punished me too

julietscity: So...I called you up...every time while I think of you...

julietscity: you are the only one have the right to decide our future...right?

julietscity: Only your decision can arrange all our future, right?

julietscity: Ok, tell me what to do...within these 4 months...

julietscity: tell me and teach me...I am asking for help

julietscity: wow...time's up right?

julietscity: where are you?

julietscity: phone call?

julietscity: honey...honey...honey...

romeobanglore: OKKK

romeobanglore: now...it is ok...

romeobanglore: somebody else used my id...

romeobanglore: my id....somehow...I don't know how it happened...

julietscity: the id means he or she knows our mails?

romeobanglore: I didn't get some things after I wrote that there are somethings which depend on you also

romeobanglore: no...they won't, it was some mistake

romeobanglore: from some other machine where I had previously logged in

romeobanglore: now....it is ok..

romeobanglore: ok

romeobanglore: I got them now

julietscity: so...time's up? or you can tell me how to do?

romeobanglore: I know what you mean by saying that decision is up to me

romeobanglore: I know that

romeobanglore: and you know what is my problem

romeobanglore: I don't want to hurt anyone

julietscity: I know your problem is that everything you do is too late ... too much thought

romeobanglore: all the hurt I can take

julietscity: NO...as I said...you don't want to hurt anyone...but you hurt...or you have hurt...

julietscity: If you want to win, you must lose some ...

romeobanglore: I think more because you are my love and my life. I can never think of doing harm to you

romeobanglore: I hurt you because I want you to think of your life

romeobanglore: I hurt myself too

julietscity: But I told you I won't be hurt ...

romeobanglore: I have to lose something. It is like asking "which eye do you want to lose"

romeobanglore: you will feel hurt. I know. I have always hurt you, in many ways

julietscity: no...

julietscity: happy and hurt ... now I can discern them

romeobanglore: please think, I hurt you because I love you more...not because I don't love you.

julietscity: maybe I die after one year...there is no future for me...then why you have to worry on my future now

romeobanglore: were you happy last week when we had that decision?

julietscity: happy to be together... the decision... has been made, except that you have the best idea to break it

romeobanglore: I worry because I try to think practical. You will not die next year. But if we couldn't marry....you need to live...with your head held high

romeobanglore: what is my idea to break the decision?

julietscity: If you can't marry me, then you never know where I am and how I live with my head held high enough or not, right?

julietscity: You don't have to worry that far in that way

romeobanglore: that is right...but I want to do everything to make sure that you are fine

romeobanglore: it is not far...it is near

julietscity: I am find....remember My life controls in my hand...

julietscity: I will protect my life...and you know it...

julietscity: If I could get a baby from anyone ... then my life would be different and busy...

romeobanglore: no...your plans are not like the way you like

romeobanglore: you want a family really, but you said you won't have a family, if we couldn't marry

julietscity: You can't protect me always...you know you couldn't because of your family

romeobanglore: you don't think how it will be with a fatherless baby

romeobanglore: sit down and think of it from the very beginning of getting pregnant

julietscity: I know my family will protect me if I had a baby

julietscity: my Mom said she will take care of my baby while I am working

julietscity: my Mom understands my independent and old enough to get pregnant...if I don't want to get married, hurry up to have a baby now...

julietscity: my mom also... She knows that marriage cannot protect any woman...

romeobanglore: I know...that is why I try my best to make sure that you have a good life

romeobanglore: honey

romeobanglore: honnnnnnn

julietscity: Did you receive my response to the baby question?

julietscity: is that clear to you?

julietscity: You have to leave now right?

romeobanglore: where are you?

julietscity: I know our time's up?

julietscity: you lost my important words?

romeobanglore: no....just now I got those

romeobanglore: I am shocked a bit

romeobanglore: are you telling the truth?

romeobanglore: did your sister and your mother said so?

julietscity: YES!

romeobanglore: I never expected that

julietscity: I know...

romeobanglore: I am confused

julietscity: I never cheat you if you don't want to give me a baby...because it's your promise... romeobanglore: why did they say like that...will your mom take care of your baby if it doesn't have a father

julietscity: I told you that our society has become open and westernized

romeobanglore: I believe you totally

romeobanglore: but still...how will it be for a fatherless baby? how will he feel?

julietscity: Father means ...I don't know...for the past...father is the only one who could bring money home...but now... father brings violence and affair

romeobanglore: later someday, when your sister has to take care of her baby, our baby will be lonely

romeobanglore: but still, the concept of father is there

romeobanglore: A baby needs a father, isn't it?

julietscity: our baby have my family's whole love...my sister will take care of our baby because she has two now...

romeobanglore: but when it comes to one's own baby, things are different

romeobanglore: I say this because I was born in such a family

julietscity: I agree... but the father can leave in a different way ... like a divorce

romeobanglore: where my uncles and aunts also had kids...my father was away, my mother was working

julietscity: your uncle didn't take care of you

romeobanglore: if the father is not there, the baby will have lots of problems in society

julietscity: No...I am the father....

romeobanglore: my uncles took care of me, but when they too had children, I knew the difference

julietscity: you are the father too

romeobanglore: I have seen my mother crying many times

romeobanglore: it is only in concept

julietscity: Your Mom lives in a different society from here, you have to admit it

romeobanglore: maybe...but there are some things which are common here and there

romeobanglore: family values are strong in your country also...you are an example

julietscity: if you want...you can see our baby and raise it up as a really father...but we will know...you have your different situation

julietscity: I just told you...you don't have to worry that much...

romeobanglore: it can be so for some years....but later...when he asks questions about his father and mother...

julietscity: the most pain for me is not to take care of our baby alone...it's that I have to lose you in my life

romeobanglore: I know how it feels...to lose you is too much

julietscity: And I have to think of another woman kiss you and sleep with you and have sex with you, and you do your duty to hug her...all those things will make my eyes cry to blind.

julietscity: And the only thing could make me feel better...our son

romeobanglore: I may live after that...but it will be just mechanical

romeobanglore: living just for the sake of living

julietscity: You prefer to live like mechanical but not discuss it to your family and ask for help?

romeobanglore: if such a thing ever happens, I can assure you, it will be just like a computer

romeobanglore: our son will make you think of me always....even if you want to marry at a later time, you may not be able to do it, becoz of our son

romeobanglore: I told you...if I ask no, they will surely not agree... I am waiting for the time

romeobanglore: of course I will ask my family

julietscity: I never expect your family will agree...I know your society

romeobanglore: I have plans...to settle down and try to make them live outside India

romeobanglore: that is a hope for us

julietscity: if I won't marry you and have babies...it means I won't marry anyone even I have our baby

romeobanglore: even if you want to marry...you cannot marry. becoz of the baby

romeobanglore: baby will become a burden to you

julietscity: no...I won't marry...I want a family...yes...but have a baby is the same have a company

julietscity: baby will have his father...like all my friends...the uncles...they call

romeobanglore: you may change your mind after living lonely for sometime

romeobanglore: your body needs too

julietscity: with babies and busy time to educate them, it will occupy all my time...I won't have lonely time

romeobanglore: when they have their own baby...things are different

julietscity: my body needs will still depends on you...our meeting in secret? ha...now we are planning your affair..

romeobanglore: no...there will be times when you need a man...

julietscity: we will see... You don't know that women do not need men in order to raise children...

romeobanglore: is that practical, honey? actually it hurts me...I want you to be my wife...to tell the whole world

julietscity: I also care about baby education

romeobanglore: ok...but the education is not everything

julietscity: honey.. If life should be like this ... we can only make the best arrangements and considerations for each other and find a way to survive for each other, don't we?

julietscity: maybe after 30 years...we will meet again...and finally live together...or maybe after some years...we will hate each other

julietscity: so...

julietscity: what are we talking about now?

romeobanglore: oh...honey...I need to go now

julietscity: that's not the point I want to say today...

romeobanglore: we can chat tomorrow

romeobanglore: hellooooooooo

julietscity: ok...

romeobanglore: hellllllooooooooo

julietscity: ok...

julietscity: I think you lost some my words

julietscity: ok...you have to go...and have your dinner, right?

romeobanglore: I will again think mover it

julietscity: NO,

romeobanglore: I got your words now

julietscity: don't think it again...just do it

julietscity: do it fast and fast and fast and soon

romeobanglore: hmmm...we will continue tomorrow

julietscity: Bye...

romeobanglore: ok...let me see...

romeobanglore: bye

romeobanglore: c u tomorrow...mail me when you come

julietscity: I will

julietscity: Bye...

julietscity: you will get my all mails during these days

romeobanglore: bye

julietscity: you got it?

romeobanglore: ok......

julietscity: Bye...

romeobanglore: yeh, honey...good night