After all the thankfulness -

gratitude galore (I thought) -

even now, doubt creeps in...

or, my favorite, struts.

It's not my friend.

I'll act like

it, but

no.

Longing isn't easy to carry,

no matter how much you practice.

Easier to let it turn,

like an overripe fruit,

into discontent.

Sure, hate your life.

It reeks more

for that.

Gross.

Longing really hurts,

but way less than

pretending

to love

less.

Only one way to keep things good,

and that's to give it to God.

Dunno how He does it,

but I'm glad He does.

So contentment

feels like pain

sometimes.

Fair.