;it's never too late to be what you want to be

"I can't believe you're leaving us." Bella whined, sadness so fucking evident. "It's not going to be the same without you."

Cammy's got his arms wrapped around my girlfriends shoulders and is holding her so damn tight I'm afraid she might snap. Her face is buried in his chest, covered from his open jacket.

She's cried, yelled and damn near buckled to the floor when Cammy told her he's dropping out of college and going back home.

She's wasn't happy to say the least.

Her reaction was eerily similar to my own.

"I know, Tee. It's shit, but you're only an hour away from me. You can come visit whenever you want-" he pulls back and runs his knuckles down her cheek, wiping away her rolling tears. "You know that, right?"

She nods, a single tear rolling down her cheek.

She remains looking up at him for a beat then drops her forehead against his chest. "I'm gonna miss you so much, Cameron."

A low, throaty chuckle climbs up his throat. "I'm gonna miss you too, Mrs Hunter. Got no fucker to tease now."

Tori giggles as she sniffles, pulling back slightly. "If you ever feel like annoying someone, Facetime me." she offers.

Cammy nods. "Deal, little one."

He pulls her in for a final hug then releases her, darting towards his waiting car, his chin dipped in order to hide his streaming tears.

He loves her as much as I do.

This isn't just hard for us, him too.

If not harder.

I grab his shoulder and spin him into me. His face buried in my shoulder as his violently shake with silent tears. I hold him tighter, my best friend. Fucking hurting.

He rips himself away, never meeting my eyes as he angrily wiping his.

"Don't be a stranger." Is all he says before sliding in the back of the waiting silver BMW and slamming the door shut, it instantly takes off.

Tori shuffles to my side and wraps her tiny arms around my torso, resting the side of her head on my chest as we both watch our best friend disappear from the street our home is on. The smooth breeze blowing her hair over her face, I breathe in her scent - vanilla mixed with red berries.

"He's a solider, we're his army." My Bella mumbles, almost like she was thinking out loud instead of actually talking to me.

My heart clenches and bile rises in my throat, a sucker to swallow. "He's a solider, we're his army." I echo. Voice barely there, filled with sadness, anger and damn gravel.

I don't know why we're still standing here, stupidly looking out into the distance where Cammy's car not long left, but for some reason we're rooted to our spots, neither of us saying a word.

It's Jason that pulls us out of our trance. "Come on, bitches." he calls out to us. "Time to get fucked up." he grins holding up a large, thick bottle of Jack Daniels, swirling the amber liquid around in the air. Face still red from his break down earlier.

I lace my fingers with Bella's and pull her towards the open door.

I step into the kitchen, following the soft hum of some RnB music playing - Eli, Jason, Miles, Ed and Mason all perched around the kitchen island, shot glasses laid in a line, filled and waiting.

Bella bounds towards Jason, him stepping aside to fit her in between his body and her brothers. Gravitating towards her and wrapping an arm over his shoulder and placing a kiss on her temple.

"You good, Tee?" He mumbles into her dark waves.

Her golden, yet puffy eyes look up to him, she smiles and nods. "Are you?"

Jason chuckles, plasters that false goofy grin on and squeezes her. "Course I am."

"Alright, motherfuckers. Raise your god damn glass in the air, we do this together." Eli booms out, picking up a glass and holding it above his head.

I take my stand behind Bella, one had in her back pocket, the other holding a raised glass.

Jason nudges Tori's arm and tilts his head.

She hesitates for a moment then eventually clears her throat, looking down at the bronze liquid. Raising the glass higher, she looks between us all.

Best friend. Brother. Boyfriend. Friends. Past.

"Faith." She says, loud and clear. "Have faith."

"Faith." We all boom out, throwing the shots back and slamming the glasses back on the island.

✫✬✫

You'd have to be in Tori's mind to know what she's thinking. Always wearing a poker face until she gives you a glimpse into her thoughts. Etched on her face, spoken with body language, or when she's so low and seeks that comfort.

She's not fucked up. She's buzzed. She's tired, exhausted and sad.

Only you wouldn't know this from the way she's looking after us all. The anchor that's stopping us all from going under. The life preserver we all need at this time in our life.

"You have no idea how-" hiccup, "-how much you mean to-" hiccup, "-us, Tee Tee." Jason slurs.

His arm is draped over her shoulder, hers around his waist as she lowers him into his bed.

"You have no idea how much you all mean to me too, Jace." she replies softly, bending at the knee and pulling his sneakers off.

Hiccup. "Yeah?" Hiccup. "What did we do to deserve that, huh?"

Pulling his comforter over his body, she sits on her foot beside him. "You didn't have to do a god damn thing. Each one of you are perfect in your own freaking way." She brushes his blond locks out of his eye as they begin to flutter shut. "Remember that whenever you wanna doubt why I love you all so much."

Placing a kiss on his clammy forehead, she pushes up and heads towards the door where I'm waiting for her.

Switching off his light and gently closing the door behind her.

I can't wait.

I swoop her up into my arms bridal style, raising her higher until her stomach in line with my mouth where I pull her soft skin between my teeth, and suck. Rushing her into my bedroom, kicking the door shut and dropping us both onto my bed.

The cute fucking giggle leaving her lips as she lays beneath me. The green and golden flecks staring up at me with pure love, adoration - my heart damn near explodes. I brush a strand of chocolate hair behind her pierced ear, my knuckles lightly brushing against her jaw.

"Marry me." I whisper. Her eyes go wide and a crease forms on her forehead. I chuckle and continue. "When I get drafted, when we leave this place, when I've earned everything you have to offer, marry me."

"You're not going to get drafted if you don't get your ass back on the court, Baller." She teases, her fingers tickling my neck.

I push my hands under her back and pull her into me, flipping us over so the top of her is planted firmly on my chest. "I am going to get drafted. I am going to make your my wife, and I'm going to put a fucking team in you, Bella."

"How about tonight you just make me come?"

I growl playfully and flip us back over again.

Hell, I don't need to be asked twice.

Ripping her black, soft cotton top straight down the middle, she gasps.

"You just ripped my fucking top!" she bitches.

I smirk. "That I did, baby." I press my lips against hers, tongue lacing her bottom lip before I suck it between my teeth. "I'll buy you another one."

"That you will, Hunter." she mumbles back.

My girl.

My fucking baby.

Who's perfect in every single, heart strangling way.

And of course she's right.

I need to get my ass back on that court before I throw it all down the drain to stay in my Bella Bubble.

The courts will come, the draft will be mine - only it's not going to be as sweet as I dreamt, not without Cammy by my side - the acidic taste can't be sugar coated. I'll be going pro while my best friend, my brother, my team mate is fighting for his life.

Bella tucked neatly into my chest, where she's always meant to be, fast asleep as her rosy lips part - my phone begins to ring, bringing me to life and wincing from the sun that's lasering through my window.

I squint my eyes and pat the bed behind me in search for ear piercing noise.

"Hello?" I answered, groggily. A deep, disapproving sigh comes down the receiver. "Oh, hey, Dad."

I bite back the snort that comes along with it, because how fucked up is it that I can tell it's my dad without him saying a word. Nah, I just needed to hear that disappointed noise I've heard so many fucking times before, but looking down at my peacefully sleeping, partially naked, beautiful in every way girlfriend, it no longer stings my soul like it once did.

"You should be on the court, Maddox!" My father tells me off. "You have three days until your first match after Christmas break! Why do you never fucking learn."

Ugh, this early, man, seriously?

I clear my throat and pull my arm out from under Bella's head. Wincing when she hums then turns.

Swinging my legs over the side of the bed, I reply. "First of all, I've been on the court during the winter break. And second of all, give me a god damn break. I had a few drinks last night because I'm fucking hurting. As you should know." I tell my father off right fucking back. The words coming through gritted teeth. "But you didn't ring to check on me, did ya, Daddio?" I slip my boxers back on and look back at Bella as I head for the door.

Another sigh. It's damn well laughable. "I heard about Cammy. I'm sorry he's going through that, sorry you are, but this is when you need to get your head in the game. Without Cammy on the court, you need to be faster, slicker, and more fucking prepared."

As I make my way down the hall, I poke my head into Jason's room.

"You think I don't fucking know that? You ringing me and telling me isn't going to make me anymore aware than I already am, dad."

I peak in on Eli's room too. Still asleep. I bound down the stairs, two at a time and drag my way into the kitchen.

"I just don't want you to fuck this up, son. This is your last chance. You're moment. Take it." He urges.

I roll my eyes.

Same shit, every fucking time.

"I ain't gonna fuck shit up. Especially not now, not when I have something waiting for me at the end of it all." I smirk to myself, remembering my promise to Tori.

"Do I even wanna know?" he scoffs.

I snort. "No, you probably don't. But I'm gonna tell you anyway, and lets me be clear before I do. There's nothing you say or do that's going to change this, okay?" He groans. "I'm with Tori." I state, matter of fact. "The girl you told me to stay away from?"

"You have got to be fucking kidding me!? What the hell did I tell you!? Girls are a fucking distraction, especially girls like her!" He roars.

My brows couldn't snap together fast enough. "The fuck you mean girls like her!? You don't even know her! You know nothing about her, nothing about her fucking soul, the damn presence, what she does, not just for me, but my fucking team, my god damn family!"

The rage is bubbling the blood in my veins. The grip on my phone is ridiculously tight, it could crunch any minute.

"The girl! The girl you're telling me to stay away from. The girl you're judging without knowing is a fucking saint! Jason? Yeah, she put him to bed last night because he was so drunk over Cammy leaving, he drank himself into oblivion. Cammy? He was so cut up about leaving her, he damn well cried like a baby. Before we even knew about the cancer, she was the first to spot something was wrong, she took her time to speak to him! She took her time to be there, even when he didn't want to talk, she was there, she brightened him up when all he wanted to do was fall. Not us! Not his fucking boys! Her!" I bellowed, my anger getting the best of me.

"She cooks for us too. Yeah. Bet you didn't know that either. She cooks for my whole god damn team, healthy fucking, home made, hearty meals, even when she hated me because I was a dick to her, she cooked and sent it right over." I panted, my breath running shallow. My eyes stinging, my hands shaking, my knees wobbling, my blood at tipping point.

"And when you! Yes you, rang me and ruined my whole fucking day a few weeks ago, I turned to her. I called her, woke her up, said I wanted to talk, she was there, no fucking hesitation. You don't know my girl, so don't fucking judge her. She's our number one fan, and my team is hers. She's apart of us, she's ours, and we're hers. If you don't like that, it's a bit tough, Dad. I'm in love with the girl who cheers me on and off the court. It's as plain and simple as that."

I hung up.

No response needed.

She's mine.