《Second Chances》Chapter 15....
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"So have you heard from the happy couple?" Hunter asked after our little awkward staring.
"Not yet. But I doubt I'll see Hannah the rest of the weekend." We both shared a look as we sipped our coffee.
"I'm surprised they even let us know they were leaving last night." He commented.
"It's a bit...crazy to see how smitten she is with him already. She isn't really the type to fall for a guy."
"Ryan's been talking non-stop about her." By the way he was talking Ryan had been annoying to be around. "He seems to really like her."
We weren't exactly talking about dating but the one question I've been dying to ask came back with vengeance. I was torn between asking in fear of the answer. But before I could stop myself I was already asking it.
"So...no one special in your life at the moment?" I asked trying to be nonchalant. I took a bite of my muffin to downplay my question, but my entire body was tense as I waited for his answer. I wasn't sure how I'd react if I heard he had a girlfriend. It took him a minute to respond and with each passing second I grew tenser.
"No, it's kind of hard to date with my...career." The way he said 'career' made me curious about what he meant but I didn't want to pry. And neither was it my place to ask if he's done other things with women. It wasn't my place to ask that. Not anymore.
"Do you have anyone?" He asked in me return.
"No, been pretty busy with my mom's shop to date." I shook my head. That was only part of the truth. I wasn't about to tell him no one else compared to him. He seemed just as pleased with my answer as I was his.
We glanced away from each other as tension started to rise between us again. We both knew we were putting off the real conversation. Our small talk before just a way to prolong it. There were still lots of questions about what happened between us, mostly on Hunter's part I bet.
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"I never saw you after that night." Hunter finally spoke through the silence. I looked over at him as he stared down into his coffee. "You stopped showing up for classes, then I didn't see you at graduation. Your roommates said you moved."
I shouldn't have been surprised that he noticed I left but I was. I had it in my head that he wouldn't have cared. That he could easily replace me with the line of girls that prayed we would break up.
"Uh yeah." I knew this conversation was going to happen but I still wasn't that prepared for it. He looked up and met my gaze, a hard look on his face. Almost like he was determined to get an answer from me. I swallowed thickly as I continued.
"A few days after our..." I didn't need to say it. We both knew what I was talking about. "I got a call that my mom had been diagnosed with cancer. I left and went home to take care of her."
The moment I got the call I dropped everything and came home. There was no way I was going to let my mom be alone during all of it. So I dropped out of school, letting go of the internship I worked so hard for. At the time I wasn't even sure I could keep going to class and see Hunter after our break up. I guess in a way it worked out. I left completely out of his life, just like his parents wanted.
"I didn't..." Hunter struggled to find words. "Is she okay now?"
Tears stung my eyes but I pushed them back. I wasn't going to cry in front of him.
"She passed away almost a year later." My voice came out soft. Four years later and it was still hard to talk about. It never got easier. The last few months were hard but looking back at that time was even harder.
Having to help my mom through her cancer helped me push aside my heartbreak. I didn't have time to worry about it and it seemed minuscule compared to what my mom was going through. So I just pushed it all to the side and focused on getting her better. So I worked at the bridal shop and took two extra jobs waitressing and even walked dogs to help pay for her treatments and to keep the shop alive. That place was her favorite place in the world and there was no way I was going to let her dream go down the drain.
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She fought hard for months before the brain tumor just got to be too much. It definitely wasn't easy watching such a strong women become so frail that she couldn't even sit up.
"Shit. I didn't know, I'm so sorry." I finally glanced up at him and saw the sad look on his face. It was a look I've grown accustomed to when I told people and I usually hated the pity look, but it coming from Hunter I didn't feel angry. I knew he meant those words.
"Thanks."
"Why didn't you call me? I would have been there to help." His voice took on an accusatory tone. I had wanted to call Hunter, to tell him what was going on and just to hear his voice. Just to hear him tell me it was all going to be okay. But every time I went to pick up my phone I told myself he was better off. I was the one to break up with him so I had no right to call him. And he had so much going on in his life at the time.
"You were about to play in your first ever Super Bowl game." It was his first year in the NFL and he managed to get his team into the Super Bowl. The biggest game anyone could ever dream about. It was what he worked so damn hard for. It was for that moment that I broke up with him, so he could achieve his dream. He didn't need me to distract him from that moment.
"It wouldn't have mattered. I would have been there Mia." He spoke angrily.
"I know you would have but I wasn't going to take that moment away from you." I gripped my coffee mug tightly. "She passed away three days before the game."
I had thought I was prepared to let my mom go but that kind of pain was something you can't prepare for. I was a numb mess that I literally just sat there staring at the wall. I hadn't wanted to do anything but the one thing that briefly got me out of that numbness was watching Hunter play in the Super Bowl.
I sat there and watched play after play until his team won. I watched as they interviewed each player before they got to him. His face slick with sweat but excitement clear on his face. Those blue eyes sparkling. He had grinned that boyish smile at the camera's and later held up the trophy. I sat there through it all.
Seeing him so happy and accomplishing what he always wanted made me severely proud of him because I knew the amount of hard work he put in, but it also cemented the fact that what I did was for the best. He got his dream and who knew if he would have if I was still with him.
"You didn't have to go through that alone."
"I got through it. Wasn't easy but I did." The small smile I sent him wavered but I made sure no tears escaped my eyes. I could tell he wanted to say more but he held himself back. Instead he stared right back at me with an unreadable look on his face.
"Your mom would be proud of you." His words hit me directly in the chest and this time I couldn't stop the tears from rolling down my face. He had no clue what his words meant to me. Reaching over the table I grabbed his hand and gave it a tight squeeze.
"Thank you."
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