What am I doing?

I feel so lost and confused. Everything has just been moving so fast lately. Faster than I'd like, or can handle honestly. I have so many feelings bottled up, I don't know what to do. Zane has been so amazing, but is it real?

It's hard for me to know what or who is real with me anymore. I feel like I've lost all control over my life. This isn't how shit was supposed to be. Nothing about my life is how I'd picture it.

So I decided to pay a visit to Lane. I need to think things through, while releasing some stress. As I walk down the corridor to his cell I notice something. His cell is the darkest, nastiest one down here.

I see him sitting in the corner on the floor. His head is hanging down, and I notice the silver chains around his wrists and ankles. He looks so, defeated. I never thought I'd see the day.

Good...

"Look at how the mighty have fallen."

His head snaps up as he looks at me. An evil smirk crosses his face. For some reason it sends chills down my spine.

"Only for now, sweetheart."

"Don't call me that!" I snap and growl at him. "You lost that right when you tried to kill me."

"Ah, but did I?" He laughs.

He fucking laughed...

"Yes!" I snap. "The only reason I didn't kill you, is so I can take pleasure in torturing you."

He face falters, but only for a moment.

"You sure you don't wanna take pleasure from something else, sweetheart?"

I growl at him and open the cell door. I step in and just stare at him for a moment. I can see the fear in his eyes. He's trying to hide it, but I can see it. He scared.

"You know I should thank you really."

"Oh is that so? And what for exactly?"

"For that day. You may not have killed me, but something inside of me died that day."

"And what would that be?"

"The prison that was the love I had for you."

His face finally falls. I'm not his little bitch anymore. I'm not the girl that will roll over and do anything for him. I'm not the girl he can push around, or control anymore. And now he knows it.

"You're lying."

"Am I?"

I walk closer to him with a sinister smirk on my face. His eyes widen in fear, as I pull out a silver knife I had in my back pocket. I crouch down till I'm eye level with him.

I take the blade and slowly trace it along his jaw line. I don't push hard enough to draw blood. Just hard enough for the silver to burn. He hisses out in pain and jerks his head back.

"Ah-ah-ah... moving will only make this worse on you." I say as I push the blade in to his skin slightly near his ear.

"You know, all my life I never let anything or anyone get to me. I built my walls up so high and so thick, I thought I was safe from everything. Until I met you. Something in me told me you'd be my downfall, but I didn't listen. I decided to trust and believe you and all your bullshit lies. Even when I finally saw the real you I was already in too deep, it no longer mattered. All that mattered was you. Every time you hurt me I'd break a little. And every time I'd piece myself back together. But you'd hurt me a little more each time, and I'd have to put myself back together differently. Because the more you broke, the more pieces I'd lose. Until finally you broke me so badly, that there were no pieces left to put back together."

The entire time I spoke his eyes grew larger and larger. I could smell the fear coming off of him.

Good...

Something in me can't stand to look at this pathetic mess of a man anymore. I scoff at him before I decide to leave. I start to head out of the cells when the faintest voice catches my ear.

"Stupid bitch."

I'd know that obnoxious voice anywhere. I turn and walk back a cell to see the girl with bright red hair sitting on a mattress on the floor.

She's lucky she even has that.

"I'm sorry hun, but did you say something?"

I ask her, flipping my hair to the side so she can see my mark. She looks up at me with hatred and disgust, until her eyes land on the mark on my neck. Then all I can see is fear. She simply shakes her head no.

"That's what I thought. You'll do well to remember your place once you're let out."

She nods her head once more and says "Yes Luna."

"Good."

I step out of the door that leads to the cells and for whatever reason I'm just hit with a ton of emotions. It seems like every emotion there is, I'm feeling it right now in some way, shape or form. It's overwhelming to say the least. I can't hold back anymore and the tears start falling.

I don't remember how long I laid there crying. I don't remember anyone finding me, picking me up and carrying me back to my room. The faint feeling of electricity was enough to tell me it had to of been Zane. I was so lost in my own head that I couldn't bring myself out. Finally I let the darkness take hold.