Hauling in the deep breath, Keely let it out in time with the note hanging on the air inside her hotel room.

She didn’t know what else to do, so she just listened.

Maybe the mixing wasn’t as smooth or, well, brilliant as she was used to with Seth’s work, but that didn’t take away from the album. Perhaps it even enhanced the effect. With a little more edge to the songs, playing on the little mishaps like a quickening of the tempo or a messed up chord, it gave the music a wholesome quality. It was pure, and that was enough to make up for everything else.

Now she could only wonder if that had been the point in the beginning. That was a question she’d eventually have to ask.

And maybe the drums weren’t as good as what he’d played on her album, but that only showed the musical development over the years. But she couldn’t really point out a flaw with that either, he just wasn’t as skilled yet as he was now.

Was he a musical prodigy?

No doubt.

As the song she was listening to for the sixth or so time hit the end of the final hook, Keely let out a deep breath while the guitar began to fade into nothingness.

Closing her eyes, she let her head roll back slightly and stretch the stiff muscles that were tense throughout her shoulders. Lightly she ran her hand up her bare knee, her palm skidding along her skin absently.

Why was it so hard for her to understand her life on a daily basis when she took the time to think but when she was listening to music it all made sense within moments?

The only issue was that once the song ended; all that absolution would sprint away.

Hearing the tell-tale sound of her phone vibrating along the wooden table, Keely shoved herself forward with a sigh. Quickly silencing the music, she stretched out to the end table, snatching up her phone and raising it to her eyes.

Unsurprised by who was calling, she just pressed the phone to her ear and asked, “Hello?”

“It’s John,” her guitarist informed her.

Not liking her rather listless mood, Keely just puffed out her cheeks disinterestedly as she tugged the notepad and pen on the kitchen table towards herself. “Yeah, mystery solved,” she replied vaguely as she began to scribble down words on the pad.

“We’re just pulling into the parking lot of your hotel in a moment,” he continued as if she’d never spoken.

“Great,” Keely told him dully before she hung up.

Even as she ended the call, her hand kept moving busily across the page, her writing almost illegible in its haste.

Feeling interested at what she’d just jotted down absentmindedly. To her great disappointment, she found that she hadn’t had a moment of brilliance, but just kinship as she read the words. “I am afraid of falling in love, so I keep myself to myself. I want a cookie and I need a hug, but I keep myself to myself. I keep myself to myself. And when I’m sad, I comfort myself with thinking that, no one understands. Sometimes I dig through shells at a low tide. I wonder if anything fragile, could ever survive in this world without getting broken. I am afraid of things that can hurt, so I keep myself to myself.”

No, she’d had no brilliance in that moment. Just copying another person’s song.

Ten guesses why she was writing down that song of all she had to choose from.

Frustrated, she shoved the paper and pen away from herself and pushed out of the seat.

For an hour straight she’d been waiting for that call, she couldn’t just ignore it completely. In the black skirt that cut of just inches above her knees and travelled up to the v neck and into two thick straps over her shoulders, she was very much overdressed for a night of simply listening to Seth’s solo album in her hotel room.

Not to mention Maureen had had makeup artists set up in her room hours before to make sure she simply didn’t skip out because she was too lazy to do her own makeup, not to mention her hair. With the simple loose red spirals falling over her bare shoulders with her bangs pulled back stylishly into a small braid to keep her hair away from her eyes and a face much more put together than she’d been for almost the entire tour, she was by far ready to make an appearance – fashionably late at Maureen’s orders – at her own record party.

Shrugging on the plain pea coat to go over the dress to brace against the crisp winter air, Keely just took time to shove her hotel key and cell into the pockets before moving hastily out of the room.

Stuck in the elevator with a man wearing nothing but a bathrobe with much more dignity she’d ever possessed in her life, Keely just leaned her shoulder against the wall.

The vacant feeling that possessed her entire body was making her more frustrated by the moment, but not enough to make it flee. She was on her way to her record release party. She had an album coming out tonight. There were music critics, musicians and just all sorts of people she really didn’t know at all coming to her party tonight. So why on earth was she feeling so dull?

Hauling in a deep breath, Keely pressed her fingers to her temple as the elevator came to a smooth halt at the lobby floor. Waiting for Mr Bathrobe to exit in front of her, his shoulders straight and regal, she followed him out a bit more slumped, her hands pushed into the pockets of her open pea coat.

With bathrobe guy gaining all the attention of the people loitering in the lobby, she was able to make a quick escape without so much as getting a glance in her direction.

The moment she pushed out of the hotel, the chilly air nipped at the bare skin of her chest and legs, making Keely huddle back into her coat. Hastily moving down the steps as fast as she could manage with the heels she had on, she only raised her eyes up once she’d hit solid ground, scowling slightly.

Limousines were really getting on her nerves.

But according to Ms Jones showing up in a cab wouldn’t be fitting since it was her record launch. Only taking her hand out of her pocket to pull open the door before anyone could open it for her, and then climb inside to the thankfully warm limo.

“Hey guys,” she murmured, falling back into the seat as she slammed the door behind her. Raising her hand, she went to brush back her bangs in a habitually movement, only to remember that her bangs had been pulled back into the pretty braid. Keely sent the Bitter Rivals a small smile as she glanced around at them.

They chanted back their hellos before two of them started talking again, but much to Keely’s surprise, John began to speak to her. Willingly speaking to her? This had to be a record.

“Congratulations,” he told her gruffly.

Not knowing how to respond, she just sent him a light shrug, biting the inside of her mouth in confusion. “Thanks,” Keely responded a bit questioningly.

“I mean it,” John pressed still not looking at her. “I would actually buy this album and I–I’m happy that we got to play on your tour.”

Shocked she stared at him for a moment, so used to only sharing one or two words with him, and usually they were more than angry. When had this happened? She hadn’t seen them since the television show she’d done that had ended disastrously until the other night when they’d played those two songs. What had changed in that time?

Decidedly not prodding at it, Keely nodded slowly. She didn’t want to pester him, because in her experience if not done right, that could only make resentment. And she would like the same kind of peace when they got back on the road. “Thanks,” she repeated, but a definite boost of sincerity in her words this time.

He just nodded before cutting into the conversation with the other two older men.

In just a half an hour, they were arriving at the club that the party was being held. It was the Chrome Palace, the same place that she’d played her first show in New York City. The first time she’d ever played with NSR in front of an audience.

Straightening her jacket, Keely was the first one of them to push out of the limo. Getting a clear view of the paparazzi who had been denied access swarming around the entrance, harassing the people as they walked in with questions and flashing cameras, not to mention the fans that were doing the same but in a much more welcome way. But the moment she’d stepped out of the limo, the attention was on her.

It was as if there was a calm before the storm, one deep breath as her back up band followed her out, standing behind her. And then all hell broke loose.

Pasting a bright smile on her face, Keely stepped into the middle of the throng. Wearing that smile as if she’d been born wearing it, she answered single questions to the reporters though she didn’t pause for pictures with them. She signed autographs as she moved through, stopping to talk to the people for some reason felt the need to come out to see her, she could only manage a few words with each of them even though she felt all of them deserved more for coming out. For the fans she did stop for pictures though, smiling brightly into the cameras for as long as she could achieve.

“Do you think your album will be able to handle itself with the way the musical climate is right now?” someone shouted out, clearing a reporter to her ears.

Smiling sweetly at the boy who had held out a magazine with her picture on the cover with the rest of NSR, she quickly scrawled out her signature. “I think that if this many people care to listen to it, it doesn’t matter what the rest of the world thinks,” Keely replied without so much as a glance to the reporter who had spoken.

Feeling an arm twine around her shoulder, she glanced up, expecting to find some overly friendly fan who had ignored personal bubble rules. But she instead found Maureen, wearing an award winning smile as she looked around at the crowd.

“I’m going to have to steal Keely away,” she informed them, her voice incredibly firm even though it was dripping with pleasantness. How did she manage to do that? “She’s late enough for her own party already, much longer and you’ll have forced her to miss the whole thing.”

Almost instantly Maureen was angling her towards the doors of the club. Hastily Keely handed back the boy his pen, giving him one last smile before she was dragged inside.

“You handled that well,” said Ms Jones in a low voice when they were mere steps away from the door.

Keely arched an eyebrow, replying, “You sound surprised.”

The door was opened for them, and the first thing she noticed was the sound vibrating from the room. Loud enough for the words to be clear, but conversation allowed as Cat Power travelled through the club. After a moment, she focused in front of her, taking in the club crawling with people in their dresses and suits. “I am,” Maureen said bluntly. “Now keep being nice to the people and make your way around. You have two hours before you go on stage to play your album.”

“Ay Captain,” Keely retorted sarcastically before slipping out beneath her arm, handing her jacket to a person awaiting and moving away.

She didn’t even get four steps away before she was waylaid by a man she’d never met before. “It’s a great party already, Keely. Good job.”

Trying to hide her confusion, she just sent him that smile she managed to save from outside. “Ah, thank you so much for coming,” she responded, “It means a lot to me.” Sending him one last blast with the smile, she side stepped him, muttering under her breath, “Whoever the hell you are.”

But another person was stepping in front of her, an older man with thick grey hair brushed away from his eyes. “I was given an advanced listening to your album,” he told her with a wink, “I thought it was nothing short of brilliant.”

Knowing that she should probably know who he was since he’d even got to hear her album before it was released, she just kept smiling at him. This time it felt more real though, there was a warm sensation spreading through the pit of her stomach. “Thanks, that’s a relief,” she told him honestly.

He gave a self-important laugh, gesturing a hand to the bartender that was standing behind the counter. Obviously he took her words as her saying that she was relieved he liked it, instead of the truth where she was just relieved someone liked it. “I’d never tell a lie about it,” he promised, handing her one of two delicate glasses that the bartender had brought, filled with bubbling gold liquid. “To your album,” he told her, holding his glass up.

After a moment she just tapped her glass to his, wondering if he realized she was underage and just didn’t care. “And thanks for listening to it,” she added, taking a sip of the champagne in the glass.

“Well, we’ll talk about it later,” the man assured her as his eyes met someone behind her. “For now, I have to talk to Maureen about something.”

When he brushed past her, Keely just moved so she was leaning against the bar. A lot of the people in the room were on the younger side, thankfully, but that didn’t mean that there wasn’t a fair share of stuffy old men wearing ironed suits. Staring around, she was just worried about how much schmoozing Maureen was expecting her to do that night.

With that thought in mind, Keely tipped the glass up to her lips; although this time she just took one long gulp, draining what was left of the champagne.

Thoughtfully she looked down at the cup, moving it lightly between her fingers. She couldn’t even decide if she liked the drink or not. Was she ever going to be able to decide even the most basic things about herself?

“Keely, finally!”

Surprised by the familiar voice, her head jerked upwards, looking wildly about herself. But a smile quickly melted onto her mouth when she found the source.

Setting her glass aside so quickly it was a wonder it didn’t just skitter off the top of the bar, Keely lurched forward a step and flung her arms around the girl who had her dark hair pulled back into an elegant twist and wearing a sunny yellow dress. “I had no idea you were going to be here,” she said happily as she gave the girl one last tight squeeze before pulling away.

Jennifer smiled brilliantly, flashing beneath the lights shockingly. “Yeah, I’m back in town for a month or so before I start filming in Australia, so Marco invited me,” she explained.

As if in tune with her words, Marco stepped into view. “You excited?” he questioned, putting his arm around Jenny’s waist.

“Sort of,” she answered, giving a little shrug as she sent him a small smile.

Marco’s eyebrows furrowed beneath his fringe of blonde hair. “What does that mean?”

Unconsciously she placed a hand on her stomach; his words had brought back the thought that her music was being released into the cold hands of music critics everywhere. It was enough to bring on some nerves.

“Nothing,” Keely said at random. There was no point getting into it here, not with reporters shuffling through the crowd.

At that point Jenny cut in, causing Keely to change her gaze back to the gorgeous actress who almost looked glowing. “Why are you in this part of the crowd?”

“What are you talking about, Coop?” she returned.

Rolling her eyes lightly Jenny reached out, grabbing Keely’s hand while doing the same to Marco’s with her other hand. “You’re standing with all the stuffy industry people,” she explained, tugging the two of them away into the crowd. “We’ve got much cooler people away from here.”

“You saying that just makes me need to disagree,” Keely chuckled, but all the time let herself be dragged in step with Marco.

“You’re killing us all inside,” put in the boy in question.

Before Keely could respond, Coop let go of her hand, though she kept her fingers twined through Marco’s. “See; cooler,” she proclaimed easily, taking a step towards Marco so that their sides were pressing against each other.

Shaking her head she was about to protest further, but then someone else came into sight from the corner of her eye.

“Okay,” she admitted, “Cooler.”

Raising a hand, she hailed Marissa’s attention easily, sending her a broad smile.

Finding her way over to them eagerly, the newest member to their little group greeted them all with a friendly kiss on the cheek.

“I missed you,” Keely informed her, pulling the girl in for a tight hug.

“Yeah, me too,” Marissa replied as she pulled away, her blue eyes twinkling. But suddenly they darkened seriously. “I’m sorry about how everything went down,” she began, her tone obviously apologetic. “I didn’t–”

Not letting her even finish the sentence, Keely shook her head vigorously, gripping Marissa’s thin forearms tightly. “I know,” she enlightened her simply.

She did know, the girl didn’t need to apologize for the tour and everything that happened in the past weeks. Marissa was her friend, and she knew well enough that what had happened was not like her at all. It all screamed Mr James, but Keely wasn’t about to point that out. It wasn’t something she wanted to talk about anyways.

“Good,” sighed Marissa relieved, a smile breaking over her pretty face. “You excited?”

After a moment of incredulous staring at being asked the same question in just a matter of minutes by two completely different people, Keely just chose to ignore it altogether. “The tour isn’t going to be the same without you.”

“Oh, I know,” she answered easily with a smug grin. “The tour is going to be just boring without me.”

Giggling lightly, Keely shook her head, glancing about them. She very much doubted that, over the beginning of the tour she’d barely seen Marissa, but the boys had managed to keep it very interesting. But she wasn’t about to say that either. “I don’t know what we’re going to do without you,” she responded in mock solemnity.

Easily Marissa just elbowed her in the side. “Don’t worry; I’m sure you all will survive without me.”

Keely was about to respond, sarcastic words on the tip of her tongue, but the song quickly changed from The Yeah Yeah Yeahs’ Bang to Van Morrison’s Moondance. Surprised she glanced up, looking towards the stage where she thought the music would be playing, but her view was obstructed by a group of men standing in suits in front of them. She wasn’t complaining about the choices, she adored both songs, but it seemed like it was an odd jump.

“Who’s choosing the music?” she questioned, peering around the men hopefully as the jazzy sound of the song flooded around them.

It was Marco who answered, still holding Jenny’s hand tightly at his side. “Ah Seth did,” he told her, oddly not meeting her eyes, instead looking over her shoulder. “Maureen took out what she thought might be too offensive for some of the people in the crowd, they’re using vinyls because he said you’d like it better.”

Nodding slowly, Keely looked pointedly away from him as well, staring unseeingly at the group of men huddled together. Just the mention of his name making the pit of her stomach drop while a part of her wished vehemently to just see him; she’d always been a bit of a contradiction, right from the start. But now her emotions were going in the same fashion, and she wasn’t exactly comfortable about it.

Almost as if her thoughts had pushed them away, the group of men left guffawing, making a beeline to the bar. But instead of looking immediately to the stage, Keely found her gaze frozen in front of her.