Elijah

Park-

I had a hunch to follow Gwen and Edwin since he couldn't be trusted with her safety, but with Ethan by her side, I didn't have to worry. I stood up and took a taxi back home.

Grandma had told me that Ethan was a weak spirit. That meant he couldn't show himself, talk or even throw things at Gwen. I had to lie to her, just in case she said something hurtful to Ethan. To me, he was still alive. Even though he couldn't really do much, he could easily possess people if they allowed him to.

Dad had been waiting for me in his room just to know whether Gwen had agreed or not. We couldn't talk about it on phone, since there were chances of our calls being tapped. Had anyone known any of the secrets we were hiding, be it doing a fake cremation of Ethan's body, preserving his body in the basement of the city hospital and most importantly, about him becoming a spirit, we would've been in big trouble.

I entered dad's room where he was sitting at the table and just staring at the floor with his chin resting over his interlocked hands. He shot up a glance as he noticed me and asked," What did she say?"

"She went to the prom," I paused," With him."

"That's a relief." He sighed and chugged down a glass of water.

"What did the doctor say?" I asked, remembering that Ethan's fresh and correct forensic report's results were to be given that day.

"I guess we aren't that lucky." He buried his head between his palms.

"What happened?"

"Nothing happened and it seems nothing will happen." He said.

"Are you giving up?" I asked," Because I'm not. And I won't. You know he's probably watching us right now."

"I shouldn't have left you to live with your grandmother." He shook his head.

"She didn't teach me wrong. He's real." I said.

"No offence. I'm not saying he doesn't exist. I just believe in what I see."

"How can you not trust your own mother?" I questioned. It was only Gwen who had believed me and that too because she felt his presence. I don't get why people cannot believe in something like afterlife when they care so much about being yeeted to heaven or hell.

"I don't trust anyone but myself." He chuckled and I looked away with boredom. He wasn't letting me in whatever the doctor said about the reports anyway.

"Get Gwen to meet me tomorrow and I'll tell both of you everything then." he stood up to leave, gathering his long coat and a pile of documents.

"Where are you going now?" I asked.

"Dinner with Mr. Miler and this time I'm determined to get that thing." He said and left.

"Knife. Blood. Fingerprints. Knife. Blood. Fingerprints. Knife. Blood-" A knock on the door interrupted me as I laid on my bed, still trying to figure out what new we had found, or what we were missing in the reports. The reports came clean the last time, but they had been meddled with. The cops weren't given permission to alter the crime scene and Ethan's family locked his room because no way in hell did they want it to be exposed to the media. They consoled themselves that he was depressed and killed himself and even transferred his therapist so that no one could find her and investigate.

But it was a very normal behavior of a millionaire dad to handle his son's death which wouldn't alter his business. Business was all he cared about.

Nothing in the media, about Ethan's father not going to work or not eating well was true.

The door opened and my mom's head popped in from the little gap," I'm leaving."

"Bye." I said dryly and tossed to the other side to avoid looking at her.

"Your dad's taught you good manners." She spoke.

"Just leave. No need to inform anyone." I said and heard her sigh.

"You'll cook right? Make sure you throw out the expired bread." She said.

"I always do." I muttered under my breath and waited to hear the door close and sighed when it finally did.

I was a bad son, but she was the worst mom.

I wondered how it felt to catch feelings for someone, then marrying him and having a son and suddenly hook up with another man and leave everything, everyone behind. Then, out of nowhere, come back to 'check up on' the man and his son she left behind, who didn't need her anymore.

Gwen

I couldn't believe I was riding on a Ferris wheel.

The wheel was moving slowly and I was able to gaze down at the amazing view. All those people looked so small from up there, some rushing around while others were simply going about their own business. Some were boarding their rides, some were eating, smiling and enjoying. I could hear screams from the Roller coaster off into the distance and loud, jovial carnival music playing below. The sky was brightly lit by millions of stars. It was so peaceful, so tranquil up there and so relaxed. Nothing could reach me up there...

apart from Edwin, sitting opposite to me and just staring at me without a word.

Our capsule was about to reach the top of the Ferris wheel and when I realized it, my heart started pounding a little faster and beads of sweat trickled down my forehead.

Don't people kiss when they reach the top of the swing?

"What is it?" I asked.

"What's what?" He asked back.

"Aren't you going to look at the view?" I asked.

"I'm good." He said, leaning in closer as he put his elbows on his knees, resting his chin between his palms only to look at me closer.

He probably doesn't know.

I gulped as we reached the top. The speed seemed to slow down as much as I wanted it to quickly descend and reach the ground.

"I want to confess."

My eyes popped out at him saying that out of context. And because he was a suspect, I was bound to assume it the wrong way and think that he killed his brother. I felt suffocated in that small capsule and wanted to break the glass and jump.

"About what?" I asked and my voice cracked in between.

"My misbehavior and sneaking into your room."

"I see." I nodded to myself.

"But," he grabbed my wrist softly and I immediately shot up my head," I'm not sorry for stealing your first kiss." He said with a proud smirk.

I bit my lip, not daring to say that I wanted him to go be a monk and never come back or that he should be grateful that I didn't murder him then and there.

"How did you feel?" He asked.

"Huh?"

"How did you feel about everything I did?" He repeated.

"Bad." I said, not making eye contact with him.

"How bad?" He asked.

"Very, very, very bad." I answered. I couldn't see where the conversation was going and what he wanted to prove to me. I could only worry about my hand that he was still holding, as his grip tightened.

"I too felt very very very bad when I was suspected of murdering my own brother." He said which made me look up at him right in the eyes and the way he had been looking at me made me choke on my saliva. He tilted his head to the right and smiled.

He knows? HOW does he KNOW?!

"I'm- I'm really- It's not what y-you think." I stuttered. Suddenly, the space in the capsule seemed to get smaller and smaller.

"What do I think?" He suddenly looked at me worryingly," I was just justifying why I did all of that to you. Are you okay?"

Holy mackerel I almost got myself killed.

"I'll drop you home. We're almost down." He said, looking outside while I recollected my breath.

2nd December

I groaned as I lifted my head from the pillow to answer my phone that had been ringing beside me. Seeing it was dad's call, I answered immediately.

They had reached the hospital after driving all night but the doctor's weren't letting anyone meet grandpa in the ICU. I sighed as the call disconnected and laid back on the bed.

I sat up straight, as If there was an earthquake," Yes!"

"Go-Good Morning." I greeted back. I was still not used to Ethan talking to me all of a sudden.

There was pain in his voice.

Who would believe their sibling killed them? It would be devastating, and he would want to question why. what for and what did he gain?

I was caught off guard with that question. I didn't know what to say, because just me saying it wouldn't change the unknown reality. And I couldn't be the one to say the answer, since my answer would be biased. Just because I disliked Edwin, I couldn't say that he killed Ethan.

But could I and did I have the right to answer?

"First thing in the morning, you're asking me such scary questions." I faked a chuckle as I got off the bed and headed to the bathroom but the bathroom door slammed shut before I could enter, as if telling me the conversation wasn't over yet.

"You think he didn't do it?" I asked, turning back at the bed, imagining him to be sitting there, otherwise it would've been hard to conversate.

"I think you're using it the right way." I said.

"You need to share it so that we can derive something out of it." I said.

I stayed quiet.

"I understand how you feel." I said and moved closer to the bed," I'm going to get Edwin to speak. Our plan will work." I stretched my hands outwards, as if trying to place them on his shoulders and pat him.

"Oh- wait." I felt embarrassed as I approached the bedside table and just gazed at the air in front of me.

At that moment, I was probably looking at him in the eyes and he was looking back at me. Only at me.

I always craved for him to turn around and look at me in the canteen or just stop by me in the corridor and wave back when I waved at him. I wanted him to know that a girl called Gwen Smith existed and was so in love with his voice, his face, his personality, his way of walking, his everything.

He finally noticed me.