I awoke to Mildred’s worried face. It was fast becoming a habit.

“How are you feeling Sunngifu? I gave this big oaf a piece of my mind for upsetting you like this, in your weakened state. At least he is sorry, you gave him a fright.”

I doubted Lord Einarr would ever be sorry for whatever he did to me, but refrained from expressing it.

“What happened? I couldn’t breathe…” I croaked. I was conscious, yet still short of air.

Mildred frowned. “You seemed panicked. Sometimes it does this to people. How are you now?”

“Still… restricted.” I wheezed. A painful coughing fit followed, leaving me panting, my forehead dripping with sweat. My side hurt like hell and I spat out a handful of thick phlegm. My stomach protested and the soup I had eaten before soon filled the basin hastily provided by Mildred. I fell back on the pillows, exhausted, but feeling slightly better.

Mildred handed me a cup of water and pressed her hand on my forehead. “You are burning again. This isn’t good. The willow bark should have worked by now…”

She left and came back with a smoking bowl and a towel. It smelled strongly of mint and spices I couldn’t identify. She threw the towel over my head and held the bowl under my nose.

“Breathe deeply,” she instructed, “it will clear your lungs.”

I obeyed, hoping it would work. For the first time, I feared for my life. Chest infections were a common cause of death. I tried to take my mind off it.

“Why… did you say… liar earlier?” I asked, curiosity taking over.

The corners of her mouth twisted up. “You must not be doing so bad after all! Lord Einarr said that he took Hrefna to his bed only once. According to her, it was far more. We believed her, as she spent an hour in his room most evenings. She pretended to be sore afterward, complaining of his rudeness. She was playing us the whole time.”

I huffed and regretted it. “How… do you know she is… the one lying?”

Mildred shrugged. “Lord Einarr is no liar. He thinks it below him. And he has no need to, who cares what he does with his slaves?”

I couldn’t fault her reasoning. It pleased me somehow. “What was she doing with him then?”

“Giving him a rub. That’s why she was given to his wife. She is good with her hands, I heard.”

“Would that… take a full hour?” I wasn’t convinced. She was so beautiful. Why would he not want her?

Mildred chuckled. “Are you jealous? Think about this: you spent many nights with Lord Einarr and I never heard you complain of any soreness…” She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively and my face took fire. I lowered my head and blessed the towel for hiding the revealing color. It was true. He was always careful not to hurt me. Or maybe he was simply more passionate with Hrefna. Could it be? Having never known any other, I had no answer.

I felt a new coughing fit coming and put down the bowl and towel, clutching my ribs to reduce the pain. Mildred supported me, pulling me in sitting and lowering me again when it went.

“It is a good sign, get all the bad humors out.”

I nodded, unable to speak. She smiled warmly and disappeared again, fetching more foul medicine. I took a sip and cringed.

“I’d prefer… the piss…I think.”

She laughed. “Drink, it will make you sleep. You need rest.”

And rest, I did. I was a week between life and death, fighting the fever that consumed me. I have little memory of it, as I spent it mostly sleeping. Most of my conscious time was spent either in the tub, or drinking soup and various concoctions. Mildred had tightly bandaged my chest to help with the healing of the bones and it had made me a little more comfortable. I wondered how she seemed so fresh when she spent all her time at my side. Sometimes, at night, I saw her shadow sitting in a chair in the corner or felt her gentle touch on my head.

Then, one morning, the fever was gone. My cough was far less, the headaches had receded. My stomach wouldn’t calm down though, but we found out that it responded well to ginger. The spice worked magic on me. I felt a new woman, though a very tired one. As Mildred fluffed my pillows I thanked her for her dedication. “It is your turn to rest now. You must be exhausted, all those nights in a chair must have taken a toll on you.”

She smiled mischievously. “Tell that to Lord Einarr, he is a ghost of himself. My husband wants me at his side at night, he wouldn’t let me stay.”

I wondered what she meant. What had Lord Einarr to do with this. Did he get sick as well? “Then who was there? There was someone, I saw them!”

She gave me a look more usually addressed to a very slow child. “I just told you. Lord Einarr did. He didn’t trust anyone else. Lady Disaelfr is close to blow with indignation. She reluctantly offered to take his place, because she thought he was lowering himself. He refused. She has been fuming since.”

So it had been him. But why? He despised me and wanted to get rid of me. Was he so worried that he would bear the blame for my death? I suddenly remembered a disturbing fact. “How is Hrefna?” I had been aghast at her punishment.

“She was chafed and sore for a few days, but she is back to her nasty self. The men weren’t too rough with her. She might even have enjoyed it. After all, it is what them she-devils do, isn’t it?”

“Mildred!” I couldn’t believe that this sweet, kind woman could say that. I thought of Magge, how she had been treated on the ship. It wasn’t that different. Maybe Mildred was right. She had been a slave after all. An idea crossed my mind.

“Did it happen to you?”

She stared at me, surprised. “Never, why?”

“You were Lord Einarr’s slave before, so I wondered… Did he ever…hum… bed you?”

Mildred’s laugh filled the room. “I don’t think he ever considered it. I made it clear that I didn’t want him, and he doesn’t usually chase unwilling women.”

I scoffed. “I can assure you he does!”

“You are an exception. And you are not so unwilling. According to Svana, you sure don’t SOUND like it…”

I blushed fiercely. It had never occurred to me that most of the servants slept in the hall or in the women’s room, and that they could hear us. It was true that sometimes, during our unions, some explicit sounds escaped my mouth. It was his fault, he coerced them from me. It amused him, the power he held over my weak body. I shivered at the vivid memories. I should be glad it wouldn’t happen again.

“When will I get back to work?”

She grinned. “In three days, if everything goes well. You must get your strength back first.”

I lay back on the bed, rolling my eyes. It would feel much longer if she kept teasing me like this.