Kiss me hard before you go

Summertime sadness

I just wanted you to know

That, baby, you're the best

***

I didn't get to see Draco again for the remainder of his stay in the hospital wing. I did attempt to visit but Madam Pomfrey was adamant that visitors weren't allowed whilst he was recovering.

He did not come out at all that night and he was still nowhere to be seen the next day at breakfast or lunch. My heart felt heavy - I just wanted to see him so much after what had happened.

And because of Draco's task, I also carried this constant feeling of terror inside of me - I felt so frightened about what was going to happen.

I reluctantly went down the Great Hall for dinner that night despite not feeling at all hungry. I felt a throbbing disappointment, one that I couldn't get used to, when I saw that Draco was still absent.

I spent as long as I could, eating slowly and pushing food around my plate, so as not to have to hurry back to the dungeons - the evening ahead stretched out before me and I had nothing to fill it with.

Eventually realising that I could not sit it out any longer, I scraped my chair back and turned towards the Hall doors. And my heart soared.

Draco was standing just outside the doorway, looking in, grey eyes piercing into mine.

My soaring heart quickly plummeted, though, when I realised how solemn he looked. His white blonde hair shook ever so slightly as he gave me a stiff nod before he stepped back from the door, disappearing from view into the Entrance Hall.

I hurried out to meet him and saw that he was lingering in a shadowy archway across from the marble staircase. He beckoned me over.

"Draco?" I whispered.

He didn't say anything but opened a door to his right and ushered me in after him before stiffly closing it. We were in a small empty dark classroom that looked as though it hadn't been used in a long time.

Facing each other closer now, I could see that Draco was wearing a very smart black suit. It was a lot more formal looking than his usual suits and it was head to toe in black. The only colour came from his silver grey eyes, and I noticed that they didn't have their usual warmth tonight. I suddenly felt ice cold as realisation dawned on me.

"It's happening, isn't it?" I asked, not being able to keep the tremble out of my voice.

"Tonight." His voice was steady, devoid of emotion, but his eyes gave away his fear.

I stepped towards him, closing the gap between us. I clasped his hands in mine and looked up imploringly into his eyes.

"Draco, please - it's not too late. We can still go to Dumbledore." I begged, tears already swimming in my eyes.

His lower lip began to quiver and he closed his eyes. "No. It's got to be this way."

"That's not true!" I cried, starting to feel panicked and desperate. "Please, Draco - please, I'm begging you. Dumbledore will protect you."

I squeezed his hands in mine, pleading him to listen to me.

"Rosie, I can't. I'm sorry." He whispered. He opened his eyes, looking so sadly into mine.

I could feel tears start to roll down my cheeks and he broke his hands away from my grip to cup my face and wipe the wetness away with his thumbs.

"Don't cry, Rosie, please don't cry." He said gently, pressing his forehead against mine.

"But I love you." I sobbed.

He gathered me in his arms, pulling me into him tightly. I sighed at how wonderful he felt.

"I'll never forget this past year, Rosie." He murmured into my ear. He buried his face into my hair, inhaling deeply. "I'll never forget you."

I could feel my heart breaking into a million pieces. I held onto him tighter, never wanting to let him go.

"What's going to happen to you? Are you going to be safe?" I asked, desperately needing to know he was going to be ok. It was the only thing I had left to hold onto.

"I don't know. I should be. I think so."

It wasn't enough.

"Draco, promise me you will do everything and anything to keep yourself safe. Promise me!"

He titled my chin up so I was staring into his piercing grey eyes. His lips lingered just above mine and our breaths mingled into one. "I promise."

He kissed me hard. A fervent and desperate kiss. I gripped my hands in his hair, pulling him in as much as I physically could, accidentally biting his lower lip in my urgency. He moaned into my mouth and rather than pull away, he deepened the kiss, slamming my back against the door.

"Draco," I gasped, breaking the kiss.

He stilled, and then took a step back, looking sorrowfully into my eyes.

"I've got to go."

But he didn't move. We both stood there, nothing but the sound of our jagged breaths filling the silence, staring sadly into each other's eyes.

I couldn't speak. All I could do was nod as tears started falling down my cheeks.

I stepped aside as Draco reached for the door. His hand paused on the handle and he looked down, not meeting my eyes.

"Goodbye, Rosie."

And then he was gone.

***

He felt sick with every step he took.

He refused to look back at the room where he had left her. The hurt was unbearable. He had wanted to say so much to her but had found that he couldn't. The words had stuck in his throat and he couldn't bear to see her cry, especially when he was the cause.

All he had wanted to do was to tell her that he loved her, but he couldn't say the words.

How could he when he was about to go and kill an innocent man.

***

Think I'll miss you forever

Like the stars miss the sun in the morning

Later's better than never

Even if you're gone I'm gonna drive, drive, drive

I got that summertime, summertime sadness