bloody hell, this guy really is a capable

lunatic I thought

I thought about it for some time and agreed to go with him to learn from him

and after a couple of hours, I had got the gist of what to do

and it was fucking dangerous

there were only two outcomes

the first outcome was the two roots would merge into one creating an entirely new root

the second outcome was that the two roots would reject each other and both would destroy each other

and the second outcome was very bad it won't just leave me unable to cultivate it would destroy both my mind and soul a fate far worse than death according to sam

sam explained the whole process and everything he would need to do to get a spiritual sense through the training method he used

he also repeatedly told me that this way was safe and he would minimise the risk by performing the method himself

it involved him possessing me

yeah I wasn't very thrilled about this idea

but I couldn't see any other way out so I gave in and I trusted sam this once

he promised me that no harm will come to me while I'm under his control

that did nothing to calm my nerves

I still feel uneasy about this

whole situation

it's going to be dangerous

it's not like I've never done things like this before

I have literally done some self-harm exercise in which

I attempted suicide and I have lived through the results

but this was very different

I think I can handle doing something I haven't done

but not if there are only two outcomes

so hey what the hell let's do it

if anything goes wrong I'll just tell sam I need to take a small break

and then I'll die or something

mother fucking hell

why is my life so hard

I should kill myself right now, this situation makes it seem so simple to do

you're not planning on killing yourself, are you?

a voice asked me

I don't know

maybe I am?

I might end up committing suicide anyway

it was basically suicidal what I was trying to attempt

like always

It wasn't as if the things I had to do for strength very any better than committing

suicide

I mean I had read 1000s of comics, mangas novels and never had I read that a reincarnated Mc who was not born an overpowered character or was born with a system sure I technically had a unique cultivation technique but I was so weak and miserable

I hadn't even seen any beautiful women minus the one I saw in my weird dream

and here I was

attempting something that might kill before I lost my virginity

I began to loudly think in my mind

and thought

how did I get to this point

in my life where all these things were necessary?

I remember how much I wanted to become powerful and be able to defend people and make people happy and give hope to everyone in our world

at least that is what I told myself in reality I just did not want to be bullied and treated like dirt

I didn't even realize how pathetic and stupid I sounded like I was talking to myself

but yeah that seemed pretty accurate at least to me

this isn't even happening why do I feel like I shouldn't be doing this?

"kid, are you ready?" sam's question brought me back to my grim reality

we spent the night here in our room at the mine learning a lot more about what we had to do

"so how do I reach this so-called bridge of spiritual sense"

"Just close your eyes and listen to your heart."

I closed my eyes and focused on breathing

"Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. That is it,"

sam said calmly and in a steady rhythm

I concentrated on my breathing

good now visualise your mind root right here

he said as pointed at my third eye acupoint right in the middle of my forehead

I began to imagine the red ball of light that shooted out lightning-like arks from time to time

I immediately felt a wave of rage wash over me like a tide

it washed over me like an oil spill

I began to see red everywhere

everywhere in my room where Sam and his corpse were standing

everywhere in the mine where I was heading

everywhere in my mind

everywhere I could see

"get ready" he whispered

I felt myself going blind

I was almost out of my mind

I felt disoriented like I was underwater

I felt like something was constricting my chest

it was tight and claustrophobic,

it was like having a hand that covered my heart

and slowly squeezing,

I felt like I was going to suffocate

I was going to die

I didn't die, I didn't kill myself

I didn't have the will to die I pushed

"Good, good now get a ready kid"

Suddenly a felt something slimy and creepy on edge of my skin

It was trying to reach inside of my body,

there was something all over my chest

something strange

"get a ready kid"

I felt it move its hand across my chest

I felt it push me back

and almost choke me,

it was as if the slimy goo transformed into a swarm of bees waking all over my skin

"Sam! is there a swarm of bees?"

It was then I realized maybe this was him

"Just relax kid, it's just a swarm of evil flesh-eating psychos"

My imagination went wild as I began to panic

I felt the thing all over me

its arms and legs were dragging it from the shoulder down to its leg

I felt it

I felt it stinging me

Its hands came over my head as it tried to push me down

I moved to try to get and see them

" don't fight it kid"

So I stopped doing anything to fight it and let whatever was happening to me happen

"Good now enter your sea of consciousness"

I tried to concert trying to ignore the bees crawling on my skin

It was hard at first but soon I was sitting in the middle of the black lake

Looking at my soul seed and mind seed in front of me to my right stood the giant golden Buddha statue and the golden orchid flower

But there was the faint difference on it now

At various places on the state, others were blood-red coloured spots that were changing shape like paper planes flying all around.

"Whoa, it's your soul's seed, now get a ready kid"

I heard a loud click behind me as the water in front began to rise

Slowly I watched it rise it and a figure made completely made of water came out

At first, it was just a slug but slowly it formed into a humanoid figure soon it formed a face that closely resembles Sam

"Sam is that you"

"Yeah kid u ready to start"

I nodded my head

I sat down in front of my soul and mind seed

A humanoid figure made of five colours

Yellow, blue, green, red and black

That was odd the last time I saw it was grey, not black

Did something happen to it

"Time to dive in" I looked at it I knew it was Sam

By Sam

"Something is wrong sam"

"But it's time," he said

I looked at him

"I know it's time Sam, but something is wrong same the colour of soul seed is changed"

"It must have evolved don't worry about it we are running out of time kid"

"Now come on just like we talked"

I weighed and put the question of colour change and the questions on the black colour aside for the time being

"Circumstances or conditions that prevent the soul's seed from coming forth and sensing the pure self are eliminated"

A sudden chant began to appear all around me

"Good, good chant the chant kid it will help you I promise just trust me"

I began to change and soon found myself in a meditative trance far more powerful than any previous mediative state I had ever been

And like what sam told me I began to imagine a single line of three connecting both my soul and mind seed

I began to strengthen the thread by giving it my memories good bad it didn't matter I just fed it like I was feeding a pet a drink or food

after a while, I felt the connection grow solid

Then I performed the next step by imagining the thread being transformed into a golden chain

Then a loud noise in the distance start to ring out loudly

Then a huge explosion at the side of the lake

I just froze not daring to open my eyes fearing would break the connection and Sam words did nothing to help me

"Well that was a curious little accident, don't stop kid"

I just hoped he knew what he was doing

I began to feed the chain my thoughts every possible thought I ever had even the voices in my head

But soon I began to feel angry out of nowhere

I was now tired of this fucking anger where was this coming from

"Hahaahaahaa, good job kid now open your keeps, " Sam said sounding extra happy

and when I opened my eyes to look at the chain had transformed from gold to red now

I looked at my reflection in the lake my eyes were scary they were glowing a bright red

I looked at sam for guidance

Sam smiled warmly at me, "good job son. You are doing great now the next and final step"

I looked at the deep red chain and breathed deeply to calm myself

This next step would decide my fate

Will it be a new life or death or something worse

It was at times like these that I just wanted to give up and stop trying

To stop being a cultivator and go home

But like pops had told me "do not be afraid there is nothing to be afraid of you are in control"

"Now connect your chain to my hands and visualise both the seeds merging kid" Sam shouts at me

I did just that

Slowly but surely the red coloured ball began to descend toward my soul seed

I was very nervous so I was deliberately slowing down the speed of the descend

I had no idea what will happen

After what felt like hours the red ball finally came to rest, and I was shocked to find my soul seed resting between Sam's left hand and right hand

I exhaled in surprise

"that was good kid that was better than I expected"

"Now leave the rest to me "

Then began to close his hands as if he was about to ball up a piece of paper

I held my breath as I Watched his hands very slowly at first and then after a few moments he did it.

Both the seed fused into each other

"What just happened?"

I managed to say.

Sam looked at me smiling "it is time to complete your evolution"

" so it was successful," I asked sighing in relief

Suddenly I felt a great sense of peace in me.

I saw in the distance both my soul seed and Sam's wings had grown.

"Good, keep going"

I focused all my focus on the image of my new mind soul seed

"Evolution how?" I asked

Sam smiled warmly at me and open his mouth to speak but before he did the

I felt an intense mind-numbing soul shredding pain up my spine I shouted out in pain "

Then I began to be propelled forward uncontrollably and began to tremble uncontrollably

I felt as if

My soul had just been ripped in two by a pack of wild wolves

They clawed at my mind as my nerves were all on fire

And I could only scream out in pain.

Then I fell like a dead weight to the ground

I was then surrounded by silence

Absolute silence

Then my eyes lost my vision

"This want supposed to happen why do you have the dark element instead of metal this is wrong this wrong"

I heard sam shouting at me but I couldn't hear clearly as if he was far away from me

I just lay there and cried

the pain was unbearable

I felt as if my entire body had just been mutilated by small rabid animals

Then I heard a ringing chant

I looked up to see the sky above the clouds turning blue.

My vision regained itself and in a second my pain had left me.

I could hear sam's voice being weak and sardonic "no, no, no, no, this can't be happening........

But the pain was disappearing as soon it completely vanished another mild pain was forming deep in my head.

I managed to get up to my feet the I saw a vision

I was back at the cathedral

The bleeding badly injured priestess was in front of me

"This can't be happening you can't be dying like this

As she began to speak she began coughing so badly that she had to take a moment and she was visibly in pain

"I will give you everything you need to survive"

"I am dying child so listen well there will be no life without inner peace and there will be no peace with love and compassion"

Then various chants began to appear in my mind

Her charming and intoxicating voice was singing hundreds of songs in my mind

but instead of songs, they were chants

It was as if she had been chanting them for years

It filled me with peace and tranquillity

The chant began to flow in a mysterious pattern and began to create an image in my mind

It was a very specific picture of a golden bird spreading its wings

The bird was full of peace and with a spirit of love

The chorus of the chants entered my mind

"My children,

The eternal truth of the power of unity and harmony can never be altered!

Only you know your inner self

Clean your soul through your emotions and dissolve your desires

And become true kings of your own self

And spread peace and compassion in a world full of despair

Our destiny is not for you to question, My children

The choices you make are but choices of a sovereign

You must understand that the choice of loving others is the only choice that truly allows the peace to enter you "

simultaneously another chant began to reverberate inside my head

"oh, Destroyer of fear and dread, Merciful Lord Master, Treasure of Excellence"

"let your emotions consume you

Give way to the power of the mind!

Let your will go wild,

Let your heart beat with rage,

Feel free with every thought

become the symbol of chaos and order

thirst for knowledge and power

transform your mind into the emperor of wisdom

become the master of destiny

challenge your fate

your destiny is yours to accept or reject!"

they were like two nails hitting my head

I was now strutting and looking at the image in my mind which suspiciously resembled an eagle spread its wings and took flight, flying high in the sky over the golden laughing buddha statue

when the bird disappeared over the horizon

I heard huge sobbing sounds

"oh, I am so sorry David oh I am so sorry....

the first thought that came to my mind was didn't you lose your senses and faculties such as hunger lust etc after your death

so how in the world was this particular ghost able to cry

then the second thought was that this was the longest time Sam had stayed lucid

which disturbing in its own particular unique way

then I froze as I saw that next to Sam was my soul seed

the five coloured humanoid figure was now the size of a bus now nearly 12 feet tall from time to time

a 5 coloured light would blade and shoot out of it in a lighting like are ark and golden coloured

leaves were surrounding it and covering it like a cocoon

Then suddenly I felt the familiar presence

from the large man-shaped soul seed

the feelings of peace anger love and tranquillity washed over me conflicting and coexisting as one at the same time

I couldn't find words to explain these feelings before I could explore more I heard the sobs getting louder

I thought of what to do for a few seconds before deciding on a course of action

"Sam my friend," I said out loud

Sam jerked up straight

"Can you please tell me what this is?"

Sam looked shocked

"you are alive " he stuttered

I wasn't sure if that was a question or a statement

I just nodded my head and pointed at my new soul seed

" explain "

Sam open his mouth to speak when I felt

the wind being knocked out my lungs

and a strange cold sensation invade my chest

as the feeling of being crushed hit me

God how I truly hated pain

I felt myself being lifted off of the ground and sent flying away

my vision blurred and the lake disappeared as I once again came to

I felt myself hit the stone and crash on the hard ground

I was now laying on the floor feeling weak and tired

then I felt something soft caressing my hair and gently rubbing my cheeks.

as my vision came to I saw everything was now red. instead of grey

then I froze as

I saw Julia caressing my face with a cruel smile on her face a few inches away from me

the fuck

"it seems you have finally learned how to meditate"

I heard the condescending voice of Pollux from somewhere behind Julia

"too bad it is too late now, vermin"

pollux said as Julia got and stood to a side

I tried to speak but no sound came out

my head throbbed even more and my vision went blurry

I tried to stand up but couldn't as I felt intense pain from chest

I felt a strange sweet metallic taste in my mouth moments before I began to vomit

my vomit was most red as I vomited blood

my body shook violently and I fell over

clutching an aching stomach

"get up" pollux shouted at me

out of fear of being hit

I tried to stand up but fell back once again

I stood up once again

this time

I walked a few steps forwards and then collapsed once again

Julia came to me and roughly picked me up and threw me to the side

once again I crashed into the wall

as soon as my pain diminished

I sat down on the floor and leaned against the wall

I closed my eyes trying my best to hold back the tears

"Why? WHY!? Why!?"

I screamed out in my mind as I felt my heart shattering

"Why are you doing this to me?"

I shouted in my mind because I did not give pollux and Julia the pleasure of watching me break and cry

God! How I hated the mother fucking pain

"he seemed to be internally injured" I heard Julia say in a mocking tone

I concentrated on my vision and after a few seconds it came back

I then saw the beautiful titan of a man walk up to me

he placed his index finger on my forehead and said in disgust

"so it would seem"

" What a pathetic weakling," he said as he took back his finger and began searching his robe

soon

he took out a round ball the size of a golf ball and shoved it in my mouth

I tried to resist but I had to swallow it under the pressure from Pollux

"in a moment he will be good as new," he said as he got up

then he looked down on me with his smug condescending gaze

"your soft cushy warm life is over insect soon you will know the pleasure of the sweet mines"

he then turned around and began to leave

"Bring him along girl I don't have all day"

Julia loudly grumbled as she came over to me and picked me and threw me across her shoulder and began to carry me out of my room like a sack of sand

my fucking second life sucks I thought as the world went dark and I lost consciousness