《Isekai Reporter》Chapter 5: Crazily stupid
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At this point, we were acting basically on our animalistic instincts, breaking off from the kiss. I found my head in a somewhat dreamy, hazy state. My hands and my body was moving against my own will, moving my hand over the straps of her apron, I slowly untie the cute little bow tie that she had tied on her back to hold in place the apron.
“No… we can’t…” (Kuucifer) she stuttered while shaking slightly from the stimulation.
Ignoring her whimpers, I proceeded. However, before I could continue, a violent slide of the door accompanied by a loud greeting startled us. A woman seemingly in her 20s with a messy blonde lot of hair came in donned in an American ACU uniform with a familiar face that I had seen somewhere before, She came in staggering around with a half-asleep face.
“Kurumi! I’m home early Gimme food…”
“Jiu-nee, I…” (Kuucifer)
“You bastard! What the hell do you think you’re doing to my little sister?!” (Jiu-) She yelled as she rushed in, blades and gun raised high, preparing to butcher the beef out of me.
“Give me one, no two reasons why I shouldn’t butcher you here and now?”(Jiu-) she said with bloodshot eyes.
“Jiu-nee, stop! You’re scaring him!” (Kuucifer) she said, vainly trying to hold back the rabid wildcat in front of me.
Though I wasn’t that scared at this point, seeing this sight reminded me of one of the Russian novels I had read before. A father comically chased around his daughter’s fiancé with a shotgun because of him making an inappropriate advance towards her.
“Aye…easy…I was just going to reciprocate her feelings. It was purely innocent…no?”(Rynosuke) I claimed with a poker face.
“Hmm? You call it innocent? Then how do you explain the stretch of her uniform’s shoulder.” (Jiu-san) She pushed in harder with the gun on my head and things sorta stayed like for a while.
…
Later after the incident, I and Kuucifer would be told to Seiza in the common room in front of this fearsome general. Her name was Jiulia Bron, the senior, her daughter has been the one leading our battalion. Though bearing almost no resemblance in personality nor method, with a stern look and a strong voice, she addressed me.
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“Now you two. Explain yourselves.” (Jiulia)
“Question!” (Rynosuke)
“Shoot!” (Jiulia)
“Why is your name Jiulia while your daughter is Julia!” (Rynosuke)
“Classified. Next! Explain yourselves!” (Jiulia)
“Question!” (Rynosuke)
“What is it again?!” (Jiulia)
“Why did you call her Kurumi?” (Rynosuke)
“It’s her nam…” (Jiulia)
“Nee-san!” (Kuucifer) Kuucifer interrupted her right before she said “name”.
I was quick to catch onto the situation, for some reason or something, I guessed they could not disclose their name. Though I had a question, I decided to ask it on a later date.
“Nee-san! Let’s stop this already! I came on to him, he is the boy that I had told you about for the last 20 years.” (Kuucifer)
“Twenty years?!” (Rynosuke)
“Yes! Twenty years! I’ve been watching your soul since before you were born.” (Kuucifer)
“Wait…” (Rynosuke)
After hearing that, a funny thought came across my mind.
“Don’t tell me! You’re into young boys?!” (Rynosuke) I said, comically scooting away from her.
“You’re misunderstanding! Nee-san, tell him that I’ve never had a lewd thought about him the entire time.” (Kuucifer)
“I don’t recall anything…” (Jiulia) she said, turning her head away with a disappointing look.
“Nee-san!” (Kuucifer)
This felt strangely familiar.
…
We then explained ourselves for the highly suggestive scene from earlier. I had only just following the flow and Kuucifer though came on to me at the beginning, I was the one that escalated the situation. Though we were scolded heavily for our misconducts by Jiulia, things came out peacefully as she started eating and indulging in a “cold one”.
“Japanese food’s the best! Japanese beer’s the best! You have outdone yourself again Kuru…I mean Kuucifer.” (Jiulia)
“And you, boy, a god can’t have a relationship with their apostle, so you both get a grip. I know young love is seductive, and Kuucifer, you’ve been waiting a long time, it’s still not the time yet. He’s still not ready.” (Jiulia) She stopped eating for a moment and told us off.
“And you boy. I’m surprised that you managed to survive that 5 years in the commandoes. You throw away your life carelessly and without hesitation too…”(Jiulia) she sarcastically taunted and mocked me of several aspects of my methods and break downs.
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This in turns pissed me off so much that I sprang up from my seat and slammed the tale, trying to intimidate her.
“Listen here, ma’am! You don’t know me…You might be experienced as a soldier, but you don’t know what I’ve been through! What I’ve done…” (Rynosuke) I growled at her, angered at the rude remarks that she had taunted me with, but before I could finish my sentence, she shut me down and continued.
“Is that so? Loss of friends, holding their guts in your hands, your beloved dying while you’re away? Do you think you’re the only one struggling with PTSD?! Get in line kid!” (Jiulia) She shouted, punching so hard that it created a large dent on the table.
Though I was still angry at her taunting remark from earlier, I could not find the guts to respond to her scolding.
“You’ve signed up to be an adult when you joined the Commandoes! Grow up!” (Jiulia)
“Nee-san…” (Kuucifer)
“And furthermore, you’re immortal and can’t die but with everyone down, you’re fucking hurting Kuucifer here!” (Jiulia)
“What?!” (Rynosuke)
“The mental capacity of a god is affected when their apostle commits either a sin or like in your case use your “berserk” form.” (Jiulia)
“Nee-san, he doesn’t need to know about this, I’m…” (Kuucifer)
Kuucifer tried to speak out but was then quickly interrupted by Jiulia who left her seat to come over Kuucifer side and in a comical sense, I managed to catch a sense of what the term “yuri” was.
Jiulia came over to Kuucifer side and in an awkward struggle, tried to remove the girl’s top. Though for the sense of decency and since I was of the opposite sex, Kuucifer decided to kick me out of the room after kicking me in the face and calling me a lecher.
“You can come in now…” (Kuucifer)
On her queue, I came in and was frightened by the sight before me. A large black mark ran from top to the tail bone of Kuucifer's back.
“What the fuck?!” (Rynosuke)
“This is what happens to us when you abuse your powers…and it’s painful as fuck!” (Jiulia) She shouted jumping up and down, criticizing the recklessness of my action. Things like “Are you a masochist?”; “Are you crazy?!”; “Are you stupid?”;…etc. She was so frantic and erratic that to a point that she even ripped open her shirt and exposed the mark that her daughter gave her to make a point.
“Nee-san!” (Kuucifer) Of which triggered Kuucifer to jump in and cover this shameless woman. The looks in her face were priceless at that time.
“Nee-san! Cover yourself! You’re drunk!” (Kuucifer)
“Let him see! *hic*!” (Jiulia)
Though Kuucifer tried her best and did manage to cover the indecent parts, I still managed to sneak a peek or two. Her mark was more defined and seemed to be more like a scar than a mark.
“My daughter endured a whole afternoon of beating and torture, jumping in and out of death to protect those kids and this is what I get. *hic*” (Jiulia)
“That so?” (Rynosuke)
“Eyup! But the difference between your boss and I is that I can endure this pain…” (Jiulia)
“Ma’am!” (Kuucifer) Kuucifer interrupted her.
“Shut it! I’m not going to stand by and let a kid like you endure the pain!” (Jiulia) She shouted and later downed another “cold one”. This silenced Kuucifer in her tracks.
“Oi! Boya! It about time you leave. 5 more minutes and that clock rings, stay safe, take care of yourself and also… *gulp* Give that idiot of a daughter of mine a good scolding!” (Jiulia) In one gulp, she down an entire can of Sapporo.
“Kuucifer, see him out!” (Jiulia)
“Yes, nee-san!” (Kuucifer)
She took a paper bag lying outside of the room and in my way out, gave it to me.
“Some gifts for the long-distance traveller…” (Kuucifer)
“What is it?” (Rynosuke)
“You’ll see. Till we meet again…darling…” (Kuucifer)
And in the end, with a goodbye kiss, I was sent away, presumably into the beast's stomach as the last time I hit the bucket in the middle of battle.
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