《The Unknown》Chapter 46: A mothers love
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'Helena. My daughter. My little girl. My baby, a ghost. I have to find her,' were Rowena's thoughts as she ran around the castle, attempting to find her daughter. It was so much easier to find her as a child, she was good at hiding but would soon giggle, revealing her hiding place and after that it was easy. She was a child, she could only run whereas now, Helena was a ghost and could float high and fast to get away, could walk through solid surfaces, making it even harder for Rowena to find her. She had searched floor after floor with no luck, there were only students that were shocked, surprised, and some that feared her. She asked the portraits and any other ghosts she came by, but they seemed as helpful as the students, very few giving indication to where her daughter could be as their surprise outweighed their helpfulness. In Rowena's opinion, it was like asking Godric a question while he was in the middle of one of his foolish quests. Pointless.
Rowena searched high and low and couldn't find her, and then the bell for first lesson chimed and it only made wondering the corridors all the more difficult with students scurrying to get to their lessons on time. She was so worried and nervous about finding Helena that she forgot to think about where her daughter would go, she forgot to think logically. She exited the Ravenclaw common room and began to walk down the stairs before she leant against the wall and clenched her fists and began to mumble, "think, Rowena, think. She's angry, she's scared...she's been alone".
A moment passed before Rowena pushed herself off the wall and ran down the rest of the stairs before running through the corridors. Helena would still want to be alone and with students in classes, it narrowed down the places she could be hiding. She'd want to be alone to show her emotions that she'd locked up tight for so many years, something Rowena felt responsible for. If only she didn't lock her own emotions away when Salazar left, if she raised Helena to put her feelings first, maybe their reunion would have been different, maybe Helena would have lived and had children of her own. But that never happened, and it took Rowena being on her death bed and dying to realise that she let her heartbreak control her, when she should have been raising her daughter with as much love in her being, she closed herself off.
Rowena got to the entrance of the astronomy tower and was careful to not make a noise. She knew the old metal stairs always creaked in certain areas when students rushed up them and she didn't want her daughter running from her again. Taking each step with care, she reached the top before she knew it and saw her daughter sat on the floor, her shoulders shaking as she looked out to the sky. It was like she sensed Rowena was there as she quickly wiped away her ghostly tears, hovered above the ground, and began to float away, not even looking at her mother.
"Helena, please," Rowena pleaded, something she never did in life, "please, just give me a few minutes, that is all I ask. Please, little raven".
Helena froze to the spot when she heard the old term of endearment her mother gave her as a small child but it was as a small child when her father left, did her mother stop using it and only ever called her Helena or young girl. She never thought she would hear it again and surprised herself that she still remembered it. She didn't turn to look at her mother as she said, "how did you know where to find me?"
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Rowena took cautious steps closer as she answered, "I looked all over the castle before I focused and remembered your two most favourite places. The Chamber, your father used to take you there and I know you still went there after he left, even when I forbid you. Then, the astronomy tower. I remember we used to sit here for hours, reciting everything we knew about the stars and making stories up of what could be beyond. Remember, the stars hold the knowledge of the universe but-"
"It is lost upon us. The universe is infinite, it holds all the secrets and knowledge of what's here and now, the past and what's to come, but no man or woman can know everything," Helena finished what her mother told her as a child and she smiled ever so slightly as she added, "you said that's why it was acceptable to create stories as children of the stars, as when it came to the stars, anything is possible".
Helena heard a whimper, so she turned to face her mother to see tears streaming down her face, an odd sight, even to her own daughter. Helena could count on both hands the number of times she saw her mother cry, all other times she was upset or angry, she put a cold-hearted shield up and sent Helena away as if it was a weakness to cry in front of her. "I am so sorry," Rowena cried as she stopped closer and was thankful that Helena didn't walk away. "I failed you, in life and in death. The Baron may have killed you, he may have blood on his hands, but it was my selfishness and cold heart that had you running from the castle. If I knew what he would do, I never would have sent him to find you, I only wanted to see you before my death".
"He hurt me," Helena said timidly, "I was in a forest in Albania and he found me. He told me you were dying and that you wanted me to come back. I thought you wanted the diadem, I was angry that you cared about that more than me. But the Baron knew nothing of it, I said you only wanted the treasure I took, and he didn't know. He then tried to force me to come back, cast spells at me to force my will but I wouldn't let him. He wanted me to marry him, to become a baroness but he got angry". Helena's hand then instantly went to her neck and Rowena gasped, "he pinned me against a tree and then stabbed me".
"I am so sorry. If I could, I would go back and stop it from ever happening, I would save you. All I ever wanted was for you to be happy, for you to be a great witch with a family of your own, to be even better than I ever was. It took me dying to realise you were already better than me. Not just in power and intelligence but you have passion, empathy, the ability to love those closest around you and even the ability to stay angry at someone". It all came to the fact that her daughter was happy with her emotions while Rowena hid hers away in life. Helena was everything Rowena should have wanted to be, while Rowena was the opposite, everything someone should inspire not to be.
"I don't know where it is...the diadem," Helena said as she held her head up high and floated back slightly.
"What?" Rowena gasped, "I don't care about the diadem, it is merely an object, one that has caused too much pain and regret".
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"Father gave it to you," Helena said the word father with disgust, "legend says the diadem was a Ravenclaw family heirloom that made the wearer more intelligent. Many people have come to me for the diadem, yet none know the truth. Father gave it to you to focus your thoughts, it didn't increase intelligence but helped find the answers you already knew. The great treasure of Ravenclaw".
"NO!" Rowena snapped as she took the final steps forward and grabbed her daughter's hands and pulled her close, "the diadem is just that, a diadem. It doesn't matter who gave it to me, whether it was your father or a complete stranger, it doesn't matter to me".
"H-h-how is this possible?" Helena stumbled her speech as she looked down at their joint hands. Never having felt in one thousand years and now she was able to touch once again.
"The secrets of the world beyond our own," Rowena said with a small smile and raised her hands to cup Helena's cheek, "you are dead, but you clung to this world through an emotion, whether that is regret or anger. I died regretting the choices I made in life, but my magic didn't cling to this world like yours. Your consciousness, your mind is still in this world, but part of your soul is in the in-between, where souls are, which is why you aren't whole. I will forever be linked to this world; my soul will forever have a signature here, but I am also linked to Niflheim. I can touch you because I've been through the in-between, where the other half of your being is. However, it isn't like it would be if you were with me on Niflheim..." Rowena brushed a strand of hair out of Helena's face and said, "you're cold. On Niflheim, it is like we're alive, flesh and blood, but you...a spirit, is still cold".
"It feels like air," Helena said as she raised a hand to place it over her mother's, "it doesn't truly feel like you're there, it feels like air is pushing against me". Helena then closed her eyes, leaning against her mother's hand, feeling for the first time since the day she died, and she knew that in life, they took the feeling of touch for granted.
Rowena leaned close and kissed her daughter's forehead before wrapping her arms around her and said softly, "you must know, the diadem is nothing compared to you. You are and will forever be my greatest treasure".
Tears immediately filled the young Ravenclaw's eyes and as she opened them, a single tear fell as she said, "you died of heartbreak. You got ill because of me-"
"No," Rowena said sternly, "Helena, do not blame yourself for my death".
"I betrayed you".
"and I sent the Baron after you. I forgave you long ago for what happened, will you forgive me?" Helena nodded. Rowena then pulled away but held her daughter's fingertips in her hands and asked, "come with me to Niflheim?"
"What?" Helena gasped.
"Being here as a ghost, it isn't living. Come with me to Niflheim, we can be a family. I can be the mother you always wanted me to be".
Helena shook her head slowly and said, "how?"
"The Queen and Death. There's so much to explain, other worlds, realms, magic beyond what is here. I've been dead for so long and even I do not know everything, and I'm on the council". At Helena's frown, Rowena answered, "all will be explained, just please come with me".
Silence passed between mother and daughter, Helena biting her lip, something her mother used to tell her off for when she was thinking but Rowena let her do it, loving seeing her little raven biting her lip, something she missed seeing. Nervously, Helena said, "what about father? Is he there?"
Rowena slowly nodded, knowing how her daughter felt about Salazar.
"I don't want to see him. He broke your heart, he abandoned us".
"Helena, he-" Rowena said trying to defend her love, but she was interrupted.
"Mother, no," Helena said sternly and almost snapped. "I still remember the day he left, I remember him calling me his princess, that he loved me and then he left. No letter or anything. When I ran away, I tried to find him, and I did...he had a family, a son with someone else...he forgot about me...Then I died, I came back as a ghost, you died, and it was only then that he wanted to see me".
"Little raven..." Rowena shook her head at her daughter's sorrow, "he didn't want to leave you. I feared the dark magic he was practising, I made him leave us. The truth is, all the hatred that came to our kind from Muggles, Morgan Le Fay saw it. Do you remember her?"
Helena nodded, "she was a seer".
"She saw children dying at the hands of Muggles, wizard children, and your father turned to dark magic to find a way to stop it. He feared you would get hurt but I couldn't allow the dark magic he was practising to surround you. I told him to leave, we forced him from the castle".
"He still left and had a family...you still love him," it wasn't a question, Helena could see the love in her mother's eyes as she spoke of her father.
Rowena slowly nodded, "I never stopped. The witch he had a child with killed him in jealousy and he came to Niflheim. It took time, but we eventually were pulled back together. Helena, your father regrets everything he has done but he does not regret trying to find a way to save wizard children, to save you. He just regrets the path he took and what he lost...he does love you".
Helena bit her lip and looked down and mumbled, "so he'll be there?"
Rowena wanted to say yes, that her father would be there when they went back but he wouldn't. Not until the war with Voldemort was over. She answered, "like I said, there is much to explain. Your father will be there, but you won't be able to see him, not yet".
"Why?" Helena asked confused as she looked up.
Rowena looked around. to see if there were any prying eyes and said quietly, "the war against Voldemort is not just bound by this world. I'm sure you know the story".
Helena nodded, "everyone talks about it, Dahlia is a saviour apparently".
"She's also a princess on my world. Her mother, Lily, was so very important. Come to Niflheim and you will hear all the stories, but the most important one is the year of sorrow. After Lady Lily died and we believed the princess to be dead, the Queen swore revenge and that he will die. Anyone who stands in her way will die...but there are worse things than death. Come with me, you'll be safe, we can be a family, I can teach you about the stars and realms".
Mother and daughter looked at each other for a few moments, both wanting to be together, but both were nervous. Rowena feared her daughter wanted to stay, to not leave the world she had always known, while Helena feared not only travelling to another realm, but worried if her mother would keep her word and be a family.
"Will you shut up, I can't hear them," they heard an all too familiar voice of a woman snapping not as quietly as she hoped.
"You're the one talking," a deep male voice said.
"Shut up".
Rowena rolled her eyes while Helena let off a small laugh and asked, "promise? Promise you mean what you said about being a family?"
Rowena smiled and said, "I will never abandon you, I promise".
Helena then reached for her mother's hand and held it tightly, the feeling was still weird to her as she knew she was holding her hand, but it still felt like a strong force of air, keeping her fingers from closing into her palm. Helena nodded, and Rowena broke out into a wide grin. The mother and daughter then began to walk down the staircase, or float in Helena's case, and it wasn't till they almost reached the bottom did it draw the attention of Helga and Godric. The usually sweet and kind plum of a woman was holding her wand towards the old warrior, threatening to remove certain parts of his anatomy if he didn't shut up.
It was when Helena let off a small laugh did Godric look up to the staircase and Helga turned, quickly lowering her wand as she smiled. Godric immediately said, "we were just looking around the castle at the damage done over the years".
Rowena hummed in disbelief then said, "and that just happened to lead you here?"
He opened and closed his mouth then Helga hit him on the chest and said, "you're a horrible liar".
"I'm an excellent liar," he defended.
"Uncle Godric, aunt Helga," Helena said as she floated towards them and wasn't expecting how quickly the two founders would pull her in to hug her.
They then heard a whimper and they quickly knew it didn't originate from the girl they were holding, but to their fellow founder. They looked to find Rowena smiling but a few tears streaming down her face as she said, "she's agreed to come to Niflheim with us".
They held her tighter as Helga said, "you're going to love it, everyone has missed you".
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After breakfast, Hermione, Neville and the twins went to class while Godric and Helga decided to walk around the castle to examine the damage that had occurred over the last thousand years and how strong the wards protecting the students was. They knew it wouldn't be as strong as it was a thousand years ago, as it was their magic that created the original wards. Dahlia, however, should have returned to the camp for her lessons but knew she had some time before she had to check in and she had a promise to fulfil. Akio and Morek seemed to understand her intentions as Morek returned to camp while Akio accompanied her down to the dungeons and the two kept out of sight of other people so that no one would ask questions or spread more rumours.
Going down the dark and dreary stairs, there was little room to hide but thankfully, no one had potions and the Slytherin students were rather in class or in their common room as the hallways were cold and made the hairs on her arm stand. Thankfully, it wasn't a long walk to the resident potion masters office and after a quick knock, a sharp, "enter" was spoken.
Dahlia nodded to Akio to stay outside and the soldier understood, believing the potions master wouldn't harm her so he stood beside the door, his back to the wall with a hand on the handle of his sword. Dahlia entered the room and looked around the gloomy, dim lit room, the walls lined with shelves of glass jars filled with slim bits of animal parts and herbs floating in potions of varying colours. The cupboard in the corner near the fireplace seemed to have an added few more potions since the last time she had been in the office when her lessons in Occlumency, or refusal of lessons, had ended weeks prior when Dumbledore finally understood she wasn't going to learn.
Professor Snape wasn't sat at his desk but stood at the table in the centre of the room. Ingredients were all laid out with a potion bubbling over the Bunsen as he placed some thyme into the potion. He glanced up when the door closed and didn't say anything. Dahlia walked slowly to the table, standing on the opposite side as she said, "I'm not here to argue, or fight or anything. I came to say thank you, I wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for you".
"Well next time, don't be a sacrificial fool".
Dahlia shrugged as she pulled out a stool to sit down and said, "believe me, I'd rather die than go to Asgard. What Odin is capable of is beyond what even I can imagine. I couldn't let my future be unknown. Would I live or die? Would I be a prisoner of war? A bargaining chip? The Avengers may seem heroes but they all have darkness in their past and it seems that they don't ask the right questions when it comes to one of their own. They don't ask Thor the questions needed which is why, when I was revealed, I was willing to go with them, not him. I know they have some honour and wouldn't kill me. Lock me up, yes, kill, no...stabbing myself to contact my sister seemed the only way to even the playing field".
Snape slammed the knife he was using to cut ingredients and exclaimed, "your mother died for you, do you have little care of your life?"
"YOU DON'T THINK I LIVE WITH THAT KNOWLEDGE EVERYDAY!" she exclaimed loudly but calmed slightly as she continued, "I know my mum died for me. Believe me, since third year, thanks to those precious dementors, I now remember her screams and as of recently, I have the memory to go with it, playing in my mind over and over". Snape sighed and looked down and even closed his eyes for a moment, not wanting to think about the scene she must relive. Tears swelled in her eyes as she continued, "I love my mother, I wish she was here every day, but I know she is watching over us". She placed her hand on the table and twiddled her thumbs together as she giggled, "she's probably watching over everyone, saying how stupid and foolish everyone is, annoying everyone in Valhalla with her anger".
A small smile touched the corners of Snape's lips, but Dahlia only caught it for a moment as it disappeared as he mumbled, "sounds like her".
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