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4 MONTHS LATER

The riot at the great hall caused a massive wave of anger in Hogwarts students were hurt, Neville had his eye gouged out, Pomfrey frantically fixing it. Giving Neville every single potion she could think of, spending days upon days fixing it. He could see but not as well. Some said that he could make out colours and shapes, but the detail and sharpness had diminished in that eye.

Seamus had his arm broken, twice. Each one being heard down the hall by students that were absently walking past. And Ginny... she got it the worst, Harry Potters little girlfriend of course. She returned from the office three days after the riot, shaken and bruised beyond belief. But she refused to talk about what happened, only shaking her head and telling everyone that it didn't matter. She was different, refusing to acknowledge whatever is is that they done. But she still had the fire behind her eyes.

Sarah was fully dead. That was confirmed by McGonagall herself after she returned to my dorm room, shoulders drooping as she relayed the information Pomfrey had given her.

"Excessive blood loss...seemed to be a quick death...We will find out what happened Ophelia"

I zoned out after her third apology, my mind skimming out towards the black lake, begging for a release.

My place of comfort became the black lake, the silence being a change compared to the heathens that walked around Hogwarts. I hadnt spoken Draco since the bathroom fight, my body shaking anytime I saw a glimpse of blonde only to sigh in relief when it was someone else.

He hardly attended classes, sometimes gone for days at a time and returning shaken or frail.

I walked down the embankment, the grass crisp against the frost that traced the grounds, the lake shining in front go me. A fake beach, a tiny glimmer of the outside world.

I stopped at the edge, the tip of my shoes disturbing the flood plain, the water circling my shoes and then inching back into itself, the pattern repeating its self as I watched, allowing my breathing to follow the cycle.

Water hits the shoes- breathing goes in- water retreats- my breathing leaves my lungs until it hurts.

The water was calm, the creatures below it asleep for the night. The moon giving me light as I walked into the lake, shedding my jacket as the cold nipping at me legs as I pushed forwar, stopping when it lapped at my shins, watching the waves retreat further away and then come back. I gasped at the temperature change, the water jumping up my jeans as they grew wet, the tingling of the cold melting with my toes as the water engulfed my shoes.

I inhaled and then exhaled, lifting back my head and allowing myself to see the stars. Tiny balls of gas burning and igniting, hitting off of each other while we humans, smaller than dust looked at them for direction and guidance. Relying on a spark in the sky more than we seemed to reply on humans. Not surprising.

I walk forward, letting the water rise as it sits at my waist. My jeans stuck to my body.

I stood and watched the still water, the black ink of the surface still, undisturbed. Even through everything that was happening, the lake still remained still. Perfect. A glass mirror staring back up at the sky.

The air still, clear. Almost like it hadnt been touched by the despair that had become the magical world. Everything inter the water untouched, almost like it was a shield of all things shitty. A protective spell over the fish and mermaids.

A gust of wind swept past the tress and skipped over the lake like a skipping stone, the ripples vibrating around the entire lake disappearing from view as others followed suit. A chain reaction of simplicity among a sequence of death and blood and chaos. A fucked up twisted thread of murder and wand whipping, thousands of spells being fired at people while they fell dead. Their ripples slowing down, nothing following. Just...death.

I walked forward, the bottom of my hair skimming the water as I swayed my hands against the tip of the water, my fingers dipping in and curling out, the water washing against my palm. Washing away the tension.

The bottom of the lake levelled out, the stones becoming smoother and more rounded, a yellow brick road for me to follow. The lake allowing me to be clear, to stare back at something that wasn't bleeding, or snarling, or smirking. To look at something that was still intact and pretty, still alive. Still breathing, moving. A piece of the world that was still okay, inviting. Peaceful. Silent.

My nipples jerked at the water coming into contact, the padding of my bra lapping up the water as my yellow top stuck to my skin, shivers running down my body and goosebumps forming on my arms. I audibly gasp, my breath coming out in a gust of heat, the cloud dispersing into the cold air as I tuck my hair behind my hair, my wet hand sending droplets down my neck.

I lean back, allowing myself to float, be weightless. My hair becoming like rat tails as the water licked it up. My scalp turning into brain freeze as the lake sucked my breath away. This was the closest I had gotten to being peaceful since before the summer.

I dunked my head under, my lips pursed closed as the water engulfed me, muffling the world and opening my ears to a underwater world of...sanity.

My dad floated into my mind. His teeth white as his laugh rang out into the open, creating tiny little ripples around the lake, his arm going around my mums shoulder as she leaned into him, her hair pinned up, the clip in her sparkling like the moon.

My mind skipped and trickled to Sarah, the waterfall of memories freezing into an iceberg in front of my eyes, frozen in time. No more new ones to make. I screw my eyes shut, opening them again once the image of her dead body left my view. Her warmth and strawberry scent instead wafting into scent, waving my hand around in the water is almost felt like her hair...almost. Almost like she was standing in front of me, her lips pulled back in a laugh as she screamed my name in delight, probably to tell me one of her master plans, or a story that she would have already told me a thousand times before, but I would listen every time. Enjoying her excitement.

Someone else dead. Someone else gone and not coming back. Stiff as a board. Dead as a door nail. Till death to us part, ashes to ashes. May the worms eat your corpse while I continue to live and breath, don't mind me. Ill just live without you. Bitch.

My mind jumped and changed to Draco. He always reminded me of the lake, cold to see but warm to touch and be next to once your body adjusted to the temperature. His jaw shaped like the edge of the lake, his hair stark and blonde. Electric and identifiable even in the darkest of rooms. His laugh reminded me of the splash the big squid made in the lake, big and powerful, creating a tension in the air around him that would make people smile when they heard it, allowing it to disperse around the room like a ripple, people smiling or laughing in reply.

I could stay under here forever, the silence of the lake a comfort in the dark.

I have so much I want to say, do. So much I want to achieve and accomplish, I want to win and survive. I have so many memories still to make, memories to relive and wishes to make come true. Lights to turn on and accomplishments that

But I am so fucking tired. Exhausted. Pissed off at the continuous up hill battle, never quite getting all the way up before the boulder comes crashing back down to the bottom and I have to start all over again.

An easy way out. I can see it now "Hogwarts girl found drowned in the lake."

I wouldn't even get a news article, who am I kidding.

I closed my eyes for a second time, feeling my body fill with lead. Feeling my hands finally be released from the tension.

I would go find my dad, search in the clouds for his smile, his laugh. Search for his arms as he wraps them around me, kissing my head as he pats my back.- "Breathe Ophelia"-

Letting him pull me towards the table, Sarah already making a table up of all my favourite foods, her smile contagious- "Ophelia breathe, come on"- Let Sarah engulf me in a hug, crushing my chest and squeezing all the air out of my lungs. – "you better wake the fuck up. Come on you stupid"- Let them hold me, warm me up. Wipe the coldness of my arms and shake it out of my hair. – "Ophelia please, please darling come back to me"

Let them sit me down. Let them give me—-

I gasp.

Raw. BURNING. Fire ripping up my throat. Someone chocking. Water all over my face. Someone praising? Cold. FREEZING. Cold ground. Grass. Blurred vision. Hitched breathing. Pain.

Alive. Breathing.

"Don't ever try anything like that again. You idiot"

Draco? What was I doing?

There on the edge of the lake: Ophelia's jacket, covered in mud and wet.

I watched the lake. Searching for her. Scanning my eyes around the perimeter as the world lay still. No noise. No life. No Ophelia.

"Ophelia?" I shouted out. No reply. A gust of wind blew and rippled across the water.

I shouted again, still nothing. Taking a step toward my shoes met the edge of the water, gasping as the freezing cold water bit my toes and foot.

And something in my chest seized. Something in my brain snapped, and suddenly I was pulling my shoes off, throwing back onto the grass followed by my socks.

Aiming for my jacket next I wrenched it off and flung it to the ground before running in.

I could spot her hair riding the ripples my feet had made moments before.

The water was ice cold, soaking my shirt as I took one long dive into the lake.

It was dark. Muddy, only able to see my hand in front of my face for a few seconds before it would disappear in the flurry of moved mud and stones.

I flaked around, reaching out my hands and then bringing them back when the grabbed onto nothing. Moving further my body began to ache, the cold seeping into my bones making me move slower.

But being slow wasn't an option.

I stuck my hands out again, squinting my eyes praying that they would allow me to see and save her. But still nothing. No Ophelia, no hair, no hand.Nothing. Almost like she hadn't been there in the first place. As if I had dreamt it all and seen nothing but weeds in the water.

I turned my feet downwards ready to kick off, my feet hitting something.

And there she was floating. Almost like she was asleep on a bed of nothing, her hands and legs slowly spreading apart as her hair reached up towards me screaming for my help.

I gulped again, forcing my lungs to keep in air and pulled her up into my chest, gripping onto her as I swam up.

We broke the surface with an almighty splash, oxygen filling my lungs and the water whipping around us as I moved back towards land, towards warmth.

Ophelia was limp, cold and almost doll like, her body slumping against me as I clambered out of the lake, the air no longer silent but instead screaming in every direction. The wind and tress telling me to save her. Do not let her die.

I hauled her up the embankment, her hair tangling around the grass as I heaved, laying her down on the dryer area dropping it my knees.

"Breathe. Come on breathe!" I thumped her chest again, latching my mouth around hers and blowing my head going dizzy at the loss of oxygen.

"Come on Ophelia, fucking breathe" I pumped my hands against her chest, pushing her chest in counting with each beat.

1..2..3..4 Blow. Back to pumping her chest 1...2...3...4

"Please Ophelia come on, open your eyes"

Blow. Exhale into her mouth, feel her lungs fill up. Pump her chest again. 1...2...3...4...

"Do not fucking die on me you hear me!" I scream, wiping the hair from her faces and running my thumb down her cheek and under her chin.

She was blue, her lips a deep purple. Hints of frost and ice catching her eyelashes and hair, the cold sucking out her rosey cheeks. She was dead. Ghostly. She looked peaceful, like all the worry had been smoothed out of her face with a iron, the darting of her eyes as she looked around when she walked was instead just...dead.

It was raining. The rain falling from my eyes as I stroked her hair, my hand resting on her chest.

"No. You are not getting to die like this, not like this."

I shook her, rag dolling her shoulders back and both, her neck stretching and then relaxing, her movements caused simply by my own hands.

"Please Ophelia. If you wake up, I promise you. You can hex me so hard. Slap me even. Ill even let you kick me in the nuts if it will make you feel better. But you need to wake the fuck up." I shout, shaking her and then latching my mouth onto hers, blowing air and then inhaling through my noise. My cheeks ached from puffing them up with hair.

My heart pounded, blood thundering in my ears as my body turned to lead, my hand beginning to bruise as I punched her chest again. I could feel every single inch of my body, another punch, the pain pinging like an elastic band around my heart. Another punch, I could hear every single mechanical thing my body was doing to live. Breathe. Punch. Beat. Punch. Move. Punch. Think. Punch. Feel. Punch. I could feel it do what hers had stopped doing.

Punch.

It was like the world had stopped, air rushing out my lungs as if someone had sucker punched me right in the ribs.

Her chest heaved and her mouth sputtered open, water throwing forward as she gasped and retched.

Her eyes flung open and and her body contorted up and forward, her lungs rearing like a horse back into action.

I clutched my chest, watching her gain her surroundings, her hair stuck to her neck and she looked around.

"Don't ever try anything like that again. You idiot". Why were you in there"

I cried out, lurching forward and grabbing her shoulders, almost sobbing at the difference, her shoulders now warm and heaving.

"Draco i-" She sputtered and looked around, her arms wrapping around herself as she took me in, her eyes coming back losing focus and then coming back in.

"Ophelia why the fuck were you in there? It's almost freezing temperature in there, you were DEAD. You had died, and I just had to bring you back. Why the fuck where you in there, why did you think drowning yourself was okay. Why did you even think for a second, for a single SECOND, a millisecond. Why did you think that drowning yourself was okay. That it was sane?! That it was-"

"I wasn't trying to drown myself" She replies, finally making eye contact. Angry.

"What do you mean you weren't trying to- Ophelia you were in the water! Freezing! Cold! Water! I had to jump in and save you! I had to bring you back, I was banging on your chest I was-"

She sits up, readying herself to stand up. "Well thank you very much for trying to save my life Draco. But I already told you that I don't need your help, and I wasn't trying to drown myself I was..."

She fades out, looking back towards the water and then snapping away picking up her jacket and shoving it on and shivering.

"You were what Ophelia. Tell me, what were you doing. Mermaid hunting? Because from my point of view it was like you were-"

"For the final time Draco. I wasn't trying to drown myself. And I certainly do not need your fucking point of view."

And with that she stormed up the bank towards the school.

I sat, my body shivering and cold. My head bowing and them coming back up so quickly it almost gave me whiplash.

"You know what, no. You are not walking away from me. Not after that, not after this." I shout, standing and grabbing my shoes and jacket, half running half hopping as I shoved them on, my frosted feet protesting at the sudden movement. I run after her, following her as she whips her hair behind her, the squelching of our shoes almost in time.

"Draco not now. You helped me, thank you. Very much. Really. But I don't need your help." She protested, turning her head to look at me as she stepped up the stairs and entered the courtyard, the lights dancing around us in comparison to the dark moonlit lake that we had just faced.

"Ophelia. Why are you." I grunt as I fit my shoe onto my foot properly, catching back up with her again, turning the sleeve of my suit jacket the right way, watching the mud and trapped water sprinkle out of it.

"Ophelia will you wait!" I shout.

She had reached the door, stepping into the hallway of the school, the warmth engulfing her as she let out a sigh, rubbing her hands together and then groaning when she spots me.

"Draco"

"What?" I reply, stopping four steps away from her.

"She stands and looks at me coxing her head to the side. "Your suit jacket is inside out." She declares, turning on her heels and storming towards the stairs.

I groan, taking it off and turning it the right way as I follow her, not breaking my eye contact from the back of her head, my anger beginning to act like a radiator, heating up my inside as smoke blew out my nostrils.

She reached the stairs, the case still moving as she gripped the side, jumping up them.

"Ophelia, why are you running from me. Can we at least talk about this? You tried to KILL yourself. You tried to-"

"DRACO. For the last fucking time. I did not try to kill myself. Do you want me to say it in fucking Russian? How about goddamn french!? "

I opened my mouth to speak but she beat me to it

"je n'ai pas essayé de me tuer". She shouted out, portraits on the wall stirring and mumbling about loud students.

"tu es un mauvais menteur!!" I scream back, fixing my hair and staring back at her, the portraits now fully awake.

We stand and stare at each other, the anger zapping between us as the portraits settle again, a couple of them declaring their intention of reporting us to the carrows.

"Fine Ophelia. You didn't try to kill yourself. But can we please go and talk about this, because you nearly died."

"Fine." She shoots back, turning back on her heels and walking back up the stairs, my body lurching into action to keep up with her.

We passed corridors and alleyways, Ophelia clearly knowing where we were going to talk.

Perhaps she was going to kill me. I wouldn't put it past her. I thought, unbuttoning a shirt button remembering that my clothes were wet and cold. Very cold.

We stopped outside the doors to the Room of requirements, my breathing lurching and my throat tightening.

"does it really have to be here?" I question as I shuffled from one foot to the other. Deciding her answer was a swift know as she pushed open the door and walked in, my legs following like muscle memory.

The room was dark, the soft outlines of objects visible as she cast a light spell, the candles around the room roaring with fire as the room dipped into a light.