Sometimes I think too much

Cause this girl is a cheap thrill

And I don't want but I do give a fuck

~

Trigger warnings: language, sadness, sex, alcohol, mentions of violence and killing, mentions of abuse, mentions of unsafe sex

~

Shouta watched her leaning forward to tilt the window in her room. He wondered if this was where she lived. If it was that would be pretty sad... it was a rather small room and it mostly consisted of her bed and a wardrobe with a few skimpy clothes and maybe a sweater or two for cold weather. At least from what he could see from where he was sitting on her bed. The bed was huge, he had to give her that.

He had seen a small bathroom adjacent to her room with a shower in it, a toilet and a sink. It was almost impossible to turn around in there, that's how small it was. Shouta really hoped that this wasn't how she had to live. Surely, she was just renting this place for her job and had an apartment somewhere else, right?

It seemed like she had some trouble getting the window open, which gave Shouta some more time to watch her bend over the windowsill slightly. He bit his lip, as he took in every little inch of her curves, every bit of skin he could see through her lingerie. She was incredibly attractive, he had to give her that.

"You need some help there?" Shouta asked. He definitely had drank that whiskey too quickly and was getting caught up in the moment. But... damn, she was hot and the way she had said they could just spend some quiet time? It had caught him off guard and he had started taking a liking to her.

"Uhm... if you don't mind, this... this thing sometimes gets stuck, but the room tends to get stuffy, so..." she muttered, still trying to get it open with sheer force. Shouta smirked slightly and got up, leaning over her, as she let go of the window, now trapped between him and the windowsill. Shouta had to lean in closer to actually get to the window and he didn't mind one bit.

She leaned back a little to be out of his way, but she had to hold onto him just so she wouldn't fall over and in some weird way her hands on his chest made him feel better than he had felt in years. The window was pretty stuck but he managed to get it open somehow. The way Y/N looked up at him with her big (e/c) eyes, her hands still on his chest, as if she was fragile and could break any moment made his heart swell just a little bit. She was really beautiful.

"Sorry, I..." he stopped himself. Was he apologizing to a stripper that he had paid for touching her? His hands were still resting on her shoulders and her hands on his chest. Her lips curled into a little smile.

"Looks like you might be changing your mind about that quiet time..." Y/N muttered, her finger trailing down his chest, as she followed with her eyes looking like her thoughts were far away.

"Would... would I have to pay for that again or...?" he wanted to know, because... well, he was truly thinking about it. She was beautiful, she was incredibly sexy and she had that understanding look in her eyes that made Shouta feel at ease somehow. Her lips curled up into a smile and she chuckled.

"You already paid the highest possible rate. I practically belong to you at this point, Shouta." she replied, her smile almost looking a little sad. He wondered how many of her clients actually treated her as if they physically owned her. Judging from the look in her eyes, there were a lot.

"Well, I guess we can take our time then. Should we have some of that wine?" Shouta asked, running his hand through her hair. It was soft and smelled like it was freshly washed. Beautiful. Shouta found himself more and more entranced with this woman and the way she looked at him.

"Sure." she said with a smile and moved away from him to grab the bottle and the two glasses from the table. Shouta missed the feeling of her body pressed up against his. Damn it. She knew what she was doing. She had him completely hooked and he hadn't even realized it.

He sat back down on the bed and took off his shoes before lying down, propped up against the wall. He watched Y/N pour some of the wine into the two glasses before handing them both to him. She quickly bent down and slipped out of her high heels which made her look much smaller and even more fragile and it was then that Shouta knew he just had to have her.

The sleepy smile on her lips when she crawled onto the bed beside him, how gently she took the glass of wine out of his hand and how she kept her eyes fixed on him when she took a sip from it. Shouta was smitten. And despite telling himself that he just wanted to go home, he simply knew that he wanted her.

"So... what is the hard limit here, exactly?" Shouta wanted to know. Not that he was planning to do anything incredibly sick to her, but he figured it would be polite to ask. If polite was even the right word. He wished he hadn't asked when he saw the look on her face. It was only there for a split second, but she looked horrified.

"There are no hard limits. You can do anything you want for the money you paid. Well, except permanent damage and killing me. You can only do that if you... if you buy me." she replied. She wasn't looking into his eyes anymore and it sent a wave of guilt through Shouta. Why did he have to ask that? He didn't even know how to reply, because... who the fuck would even think of killing her? And permanent harm... did she mean like scars? Or... or worse?

"Were you... thinking of anything specific?" she wanted to know taking big gulps from her wine. Shouta put his glass down on the small bedside table and leaned over to her to caress the side of her face, running his thumb along her cheekbone. She was still avoiding looking into his eyes.

"Hey, I'm not... I don't... fuck, I'm not going to do anything like that. Okay?" he said to her. She finally looked up to him and nodded, but her eyes looked dull now, as if she was disappointed about something. She turned away and put her glass onto the bedside table, before looking back at him.

Shouta put his hands on her hips and pulled her closer to himself, running a hand through her hair and looking at every little inch of her face, trying to somehow commit her to memory as much as possible. Her fingertips wandered up to his arms, gingerly feeling his biceps through his shirt.

"Is it okay if I kiss you?" he wanted to know, leaning in closer to her, placing his arms beside her head. The way her chest rose and sunk was hypnotising to him. He felt relieved when he saw a slight smile creep back onto her face.

"Yeah, sure." she replied and wrapped her arms around his neck, as he leaned down and gently pressed his lips to hers, his hand raking through her hair as he deepened their kiss. Her lips were soft and tasted of wine and whiskey and smoke. He bit down gently on her lower lip causing her to gasp softly.

Shouta could have easily forgotten where he was and that he (or rather Hizashi) paid for this, if it hadn't been for the neon lights from the street shining into the window and the faint noise of the music downstairs and the laughter of one of the other girls as she walked past in the hallway.

Shouta pulled away from her and looked down, as she slowly opened her eyes looking at him dreamily. He pushed himself up and sat up on his knees, one knee to each side. She gave him an expectant look, as if she was waiting for him to tell her what to do next. Oh, he wasn't going to waste any time with that.

"Take off my clothes." he told her, sitting back, resting on his heels. She quickly sat up, her legs still trapped underneath him, as she reached out to unbutton his shirt slowly, her eyes wandering over his abs and his scars, but not in the usual admiring way that he was used to. Her eyes looked at them knowingly, as if she was taking a mental note of every single scar on his chest, before she slowly slid the shirt of her shoulders. Her touch was so gentle and careful, it gave Shouta goosebumps.

He grabbed Y/N's chin between his fingers and made her look up at him. Her hands stopped just above his waistband, as she patiently waited for him to tell her what to do. Shouta just looked at her and ran his hand through her hair again, feeling down her back and between her shoulders, until he found the clasp of her bra and opened it. He carefully took it off, sliding the straps down her arms and tossing it aside.

"What's your safeword?" he wanted to know. Y/N gave him a confused look, as she undid his pants.

"Safeword? I-I don't think we do that here... Not when you pay that much, at least..." she replied, confusion written all over her face. Shouta frowned, but quickly smiled at her again when he saw the slightly scared expression on her face.

"No safeword, huh? Alright. If you're uncomfortable or anything's too much, you say 'red', okay? Even if you're only a little uncomfortable. Understand?" he told her. He couldn't believe the concept of a safeword seemed so outlandish to her. Shouta wondered what kind of life this girl has had so far that she appeared so used to people doing whatever they wanted to her.

"Yes, I understand." she replied, almost shyly, as she stripped him off his pants and his boxers, glancing down at his erection for a second, before quickly looking up into his eyes again. Shouta smiled and pushed her back down onto the bed by her shoulders, kissing her neck gently at first, before sucking at the spots that made her squirm just a little, until he made it all the way to her collarbone.

Shouta could hear her gasping and letting out a shaky breath as he kissed that spot just below her collarbone. The way she squirmed underneath him made him want to take her right there and then, but he had to remind himself that he had all the time in the world. He didn't want to rush this.

After lingering at her collarbone for a while, he moved further down, until he reached her breasts. He held one in his hand and ran his thumb slowly over her nipple, before diving down again and kissing and sucking and licking on it. He felt her buck her hips underneath him, as she moaned out quietly. He bit down gently on her nipple which made her hiss and entangle her fingers in his hair. Shouta grunted - he loved his hair being played with and tugged at. Fuck.

He looked up at her, eyes closed, hair getting a little messier, her nipples hard and erect. He ran both his thumbs over them again, before moving further down, kissing all the way to her belly button and then - holding onto her hips, down to the beginning of her waistband, as he felt her tugging at his hair gently. He looked up to her.

"Everything okay?" he wanted to know. She nodded and let go of his hair, before reaching for a drawer in the bedside table and grabbing a small bottle and a packaged condom from it. She placed them beside her wine glass and smiled at him.

"Condom and lube. I... I thought I better put it there now." she explained quickly. Shouta smiled at her and nodded. He hadn't even thought of that right now, so he was glad she brought it up. She seemed relieved that he had just accepted it, as if... Shouta didn't want to think about it.

He hooked his thumbs under the sides of her black lace thong and pulled it down her legs, revealing her clean-shaven pussy. Fuck, she was gorgeous. He pressed a soft kiss to her folds before gently pushing her legs apart, giving him a full view of her sex. He gasped a little when he saw her, because... damn, it had been a while since he had gotten laid, hadn't it? He hated to agree with Hizashi, but... maybe he was right.

"Fuck, you're beautiful..." he muttered, before running a finger between her folds. Damn, and she was wet, too. He heard her gasping and trying to close her legs again, but he quickly held them apart.

"Ah, ah, ah. We're not done here." he said, before pressing his thumb to her clit and slowly rubbing circles around it. He heard her moan softly, as she clutched the bedsheets in her fists. Shouta smiled to himself. She looked so gorgeous, her eyes closed, writhing on the bed, her legs apart and her mouth slightly open. She was perfect like this. Perfect for him. Just for him.

Shouta kissed the insides of her thighs, sucking on them and putting a little more pressure on her clit, before prodding at her entrance with his index finger. He heard Y/N whimpering and moving against him. Shouta was wondering if she actually enjoyed this or if she was pretending, since he was paying her, but... fuck, she was so hot and he couldn't care less right now.

He pushed his finger inside her, feeling how warm and wet she was. He curled her finger up inside her and kept circling around her clit with his thumb. Y/N gasped and moaned and spread her legs even further, so he could get better access. Shouta bit his lip and moved his finger inside her slowly at first, before picking up a faster and steady rhythm, eliciting more and more moans from her.

Not long after he added a second finger and felt her clenching around him. Fuck, she'd feel so good around his cock. He had no idea how long he'd be able to wait, but he wanted to make this fun for her, too. She squirmed and moaned underneath him and it was driving him crazy.

"Mmh... Oh God... I think I..." she moaned. Shouta stilled inside her, feeling her clench around his fingers a few times, before she opened her eyes and gave him a disappointed look. He slowly pulled his fingers out of her and pressed a kiss to her clit, before letting go of her legs.

"Hands and knees, Y/N." he told her, as he grabbed the condom from the nightstand and quickly put it on, watching her turn around and arching her back out of the corner of his eyes. Every little bit of skin he saw of her was just perfect and beautiful and he wanted to feel it underneath him. He let his hands wander over her hips and along her spine until it rested between her shoulder blades, pushing her down a little, so her back was forming a perfect arch.

He lined himself up at her entrance and gently massaged her spine a little, before slowly pushing inside of her. She seemed to be scared again, judging from the way she clutched the bedsheets and the way she buried her face in her pillow. Shouta reached around her hip and rubbed her clit slowly as he pushed all the way inside of her, finally bottoming out and stilling inside of her.

"Are you alright?" he wanted to know. It felt like torture not being able to move yet, especially when she felt so perfect around him, almost like she was made just for him. He drew some circles on her hip with his fingertips.

"Yeah, I'm fine." she replied. Shouta didn't say anything, he just smiled and moved inside her, just testing if she'd be okay, before he pulled out almost completely and slammed back inside of her, getting into a fast rhythm, only encouraged by Y/N stretching her back further and moving against him, as she let out louder moans and gasps. He felt her clenching around him and he could feel the pressure building up inside him. Fuck, she was just too good...

"Oh God... fuck..." he heard her crying out, which snapped him back to reality. He pulled out of her completely and playfully smacked her ass. She winced and turned a little, giving him a pleading look.

"I want to see your face when you cum." he told her and quickly pushed her on her back again by her hips. He was kneeling between her legs and pulled her hips closer to him, resting her legs on his shoulders, before slamming back inside of her. Y/N let out a long and drawn-out moan and let her head fall back.

"Fuck, Shouta..." she cried out, as he was thrusting inside of her. He was grabbing onto her thighs so strongly, he was sure he was leaving bruises on her legs, but... fuck, the feeling of her clenching around his cock, the sight of her breasts moving in sync with his thrusts... it was driving him insane, he felt his climax building up inside him again. She let out loud moans and whimpers.

"I'm going to... I'm going to cum..." she finally whined and those words brought him over the edge as he released inside her with a loud moan. He could feel her legs trembling as she had reached her own climax and as she was clenching around him the last few times. God, this was good.

He pulled out of her and laid down beside her, pulling her closer to him and pulling her body close to him, entangling his fingers in her hair, as he kissed the top of her head. He just wanted to hold her close, make her feel safe. It was so easy to forget that it was all just pretense.