Lucifer tends to have some dark circles or even bags beneath his eyes from lack of sleep and additional stress mainly caused from him trying to keep up with his standards and punishing his brothers for their rather mischievous or stupid behavior.

I feel sorry for him, the amount of stress he must carry can’t be good for him mentally not to mention his workload that he somehow manages to keep on top of along with his classes. There have been a few occasions where I’ve seen him fall asleep in his study. During these times I tend to sneak in and wrap a blanket around him, hearing him muttering softly to himself in his sleep.

Recently, Lucifer has been really withdrawn and colder than usual towards me, almost as if to push me away for whatever reason. I can’t say it doesn’t hurt, I really do want to understand what’s wrong and what’s going on but… I feel like I should wait until he is ready to come to me. I wouldn’t want to force him, even though the avoidance is weighing somewhat heavily on my heart.

Though I think he started to avoid me around 4 days ago, when I told him I was worried about him. I probably annoyed him. Thinking about it, if I recall correctly he did begin to raise his voice at me slightly. I sincerely hope he doesn’t hate me…

FLASHBACK

I knocked on the door to the study, hoping that I haven’t disturbed any of Lucifer’s important work. For a few moments I hear nothing but silence, so I decided to knock once more. I wait a few moments again but still nothing, assuming he has fallen asleep, I let myself in quietly.

Sure enough, when I walked in and looked across the study at the desk, I saw a sleeping Lucifer, pen in hand, head laying on his arms on the table. His brows were still somewhat furrowed, and his hair looked somewhat disheveled. His eyes had dark circles which wasn’t unusual but I still felt a twinge of sadness somewhere deep in my soul. I frown upon seeing this, as I really wish he would get a good rest and a few days of piece without feeling stressed or overworked.

Hesitantly, I reached out and pet his head ever so softly, in response he moved ever so slightly and mumbled something, though I wasn’t able to hear him properly. Suddenly, I felt a hand grab mine, their grip was tight, and it made me wince slightly. It was then that Lucifer opened his eyes, his expression quickly turning from an annoyed one to a soft expression upon seeing my face, which showed slight signs of discomfort. His grip loosened for a moment before he let me go entirely. I held my hand to my chest and watched as he ran his gloved hand through his disheveled hair, sitting up right and attempting to not yawn.

“Y/N, my apologies. Would you mind keeping this between us, and I apologise if I hurt you just now, you surprised me.” Lucifer said, sending an apologetic gaze.

“Huh? Oh you fell asleep… yeah no worries… and don’t worry! It didn’t hurt that much really!” I shook my head and smiled awkwardly; my brows furrowed with worry.

“So, what brings you here?” He asked, composing himself.

“Oh? I was going to ask if you wanted to have a cup of-” I began to speak, looking off to the side.

“What’s bothering you?” Lucifer seemed to try and reach out to me for a moment though he hesitated and placed both his hands on his desk.

“What?” My gaze shot straight to Lucifer’s face in slight sock.

“I’m not Mammon.” My brows furrowed once more, this time with confusion for a moment. “I mean to say; I’m not an idiot Y/N. I can tell something is bothering you by taking one look at your face.”

“Well… It’s just- I- Lucifer… I’m really worried about you.” As I told him this, my gaze stuck to the floor.

“About me?”

“Yeah, you don’t look well, it’s like you’re not taking care of yourself. I know that you’re really stressed and overworked so if there’s anything at all that I can do please let-“

“Do you think of me as some useless child Y/N?” Lucifer cut me off, his tone of voice showed clear annoyance as the words almost came out like sheer venom making my heart sink slowly.

“What? No! I’m just worr-“

“Your worry is wasted on me, as you can see I am perfectly fine on my own.” He cut me off once more, standing from his desk for a moment, a glare evident on his face.

“But-“ I tried to reason with him but I was once again cut off.

“But nothing. Is that all. As you can see, I am rather busy.” He gestured to the piles of finished and unfinished paperwork at his desk before sending me a slight glare. “If you are done, you may take your leave.” His voice was raised as he spoke, and at this my heart shattered. Tears threatened to spill as he say back down, grabbing a paper from his unfinished pile.

I left the study, closing the door behind me gently, before speeding up the corridor to get to my room. Though on the way, I bumped into Asmodeus and Mammon who seemed to be bickering about god knows what. I was trying to not pay much attention as I thought I was going to cry there and then, tears still threatening to spill from my eyes like a river.

“Oh Y/N!” Asmodeus cooed my name, but I just stifled a cry and ran past.

“OI! Y/N!” Mammon also attempted to call as I bolted to my room. The confused brothers stared at each other with worried expressions for a moment before ultimately deciding to leave me alone.

The second I arrived in my room I closed the door and threw myself onto my bed, trying so hard to keep my sobs silent to not let anyone know I was upset and to not annoy anyone.

I remember crying for around an hour before getting called for dinner, which I then refused to attend as I ‘felt unwell’. Thankfully, Beel came by with food for me, which I deeply appreciated even though half of the food has been eaten already.

BACK TO THE PRESENT

After dinner, I had returned to my room and finished my homework with Satan. After Satan had left, Levi came over to my room to show me a new mobile game that he installed on his D.D.D. Mammon and Beel also came over which Levi didn’t exactly appreciate but in honestly, I enjoyed the company as it helped distract me from the whole Lucifer situation. Just then we got a text in the group chat.

Asmo: Hey, why don’t we all have a movie night tonight?

Belphie: Too tired.

Mammon: Aren’t ya always tired?

Belphie: Touché. Aren’t you always broke?

Levi: OOF

Beel: Will there be Snacks?

Satan: How are we related again-

Me: Sure!

Mammon: DIBS ON SITTING NEXT TO Y/N!

Asmo: No fair! I wanted to sit next to Y/N!

Levi: Pfft why would I want to sit next to a normie… unless… jk… unless…

Belphie: What’s the movie?

Beel: Where is Lucifer?

Asmo: It’s a romace but also a horror…

Asmo: See everyone in the living room in 10 mins!

And with that the conversation was over. No one really responded to what Levi said and he seemed to be blushing and embarrassed as he closed his phone and walked out of my room, leaving just me, Mammon and Beel.

Slowly, we made our way to the living room. Beel sat down for a few moments before getting up to go to the kitchen. Belphie sat in his usual spot, clutching his pillow as he yawned. Then came Satan and finally Asmo with a rather reluctant Lucifer being dragged behind him. Asmo practically pushed Lucifer onto the couch beside me, leaving a small enough gap for him to squeeze himself in next to me. (Lucifer seemed to be very annoyed by this but remained silent.)

Once the movie finished, along with 3 entire boxes of tissues from how much Asmo, Mammon, Levi and I cried through the movie, I returned to my room. I can’t lie, all I thought about through the movie was Lucifer, every now and again I caught a glance of him, his somewhat tired expression was evident, causing a tinge of pain deep in my heart. I just want to be able to help him and care for him…

I know that loving him has always somewhat been out of the question, he is far too stubborn, and I find it unlikely that he would share these feelings for me. The movie made me feel incredibly empty as it made the realization that he will never love me cut deeper into my soul. Or at least that’s how it felt. In the end, the couple fell apart and one of them was lost forever… It was an excruciatingly sad movie, sadder than I expected.

I dressed into my pajamas and flopped myself onto my bed, my face was red and somewhat blotchy from the tears I had shed previously. I closed my eyes for a few moments, expecting sleep to take over me before hearing a knock at my door.

I got up from my bed, slowly walking over to the door as the person on the other side began to knock more desperately. I opened the door to reveal Lucifer. Before I could even speak he leaned down, placing his head into the crook of my neck, wrapping his arms around me loosely. I stood there, still, in complete shock and confusion with eyes wide.

“L-Luci-” My voice shook slightly as I called his name, feeling his breath on my neck.

“I’m sorry.” He responded in a soft and gently yet tired tone.

“What?”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I avoided you for so long, I didn’t want you to worry about me. It made me feel pathetic. But I just don’t want to lose you either.” The more he spoke, the more you could hear the tiredness in his voice.

“I missed you Luci!” I reply as I wrap my arms around him in return. Just then Lucifer seemed to stumble forwards, almost tripping me backwards. I managed to quickly catch myself. “Woah! Luci, if you’re tired go to bed!”

“Too tired. Let me sleep here.” He lifted his head from my neck and stared tiredly at me with what looked like a smirk.

“Luci! Jeez… fine. C’mon sleepy head!” I took his hand and let him to my bed, blushing slightly.

I lay next to Lucifer, leaving a small but comfortable gap between us. His hair was somewhat disheveled once again. I reached out and began to stoke his hair gently, staring at his face for a few moments before he mumbled something.

“What was that?” I asked in a quiet tone.

“Come here.” He lifted the duvet slightly and held an arm out, guiding me into his embrace. My face went through every shade of red as he placed his head on mine, my head on his chest. “I love you.” He said as I froze for a moment.

“I love you too, Lucifer. Goodnight.” I nuzzled my face into his chest more, smiling like an idiot, hearing his heartbeat, and taking in his scent.

“Goodnight, love.” He responded tiredly before placing a gentle kiss upon my head and letting sleep overcome him.

That was the first good night’s sleep Lucifer had had in a long time, though now his brothers were misbehaving and whining more often as he had ‘stolen their Y/N’. Any time that Y/N saw Lucifer tired she would care for him and even at times scold him for being stubborn.