Jae-in POV:

For the following 5 years, I survived alone. Farming on stolen crops in the backyard to have something to eat, fed on rats for meat, drink untreated muddy water given by other palace servants while they laughed at my pathetic state.

I swallowed each and every grudge, unwillingness, unfairness that I harbour and turn it into the only drive to survive. But, I guess the gods want to strip away the one and only life that I ever have.

Fell ill with no medicine to heal and eventually I lay on the bed all by myself, looking up to the ceiling as I cough out blood. I will never ever let myself be in this situation ever again. I will not forget those who framed me and I will not die because this is not the time yet. I have yet to receive Xuan Di's love.

Please, someone please help me because I don't want to die yet.

Unhappy with the result that I received, I raised my weak arms to reach out towards the ceiling and attempt to grab something but, dropping it as though there was no more energy left ...

I guess the gods have heard my pleas and resentment because when I open my eyes, here I am back alive to the moment when I first move into the palace with Xuan Di as he ruled as Emperor for the first year, Xuan Yuan 18.

Since being the kind and understanding Empress doesn't lead me to a good ending, this life I shall be the malicious and evil Empress that will never let people take advantage of me. Since being the loving and patient wife that hopes for you to turn back and look at me doesn't let me get your love, this time I shall be the one stealing your love regardless of the methods used.

Throughout the years of being the Empress from Xuan Yuan 18 to Xuan Yuan 27, I raised my own powers by pulling the right officials under my wing to work for me. Using the right people to kill whoever that gets into my way and most importantly, destroying whoever that gains Xuan Di's love. I led a life with a twisted mind and personality.

Since I was unable to be pregnant in my previous life, this life no one will ever be pregnant till I am pregnant. Using forbidden medicine that caused other consorts to have miscarriage or inability of fertility while I fed on huge amount of medicine and cure to make me fertile.

Noble Lady Xue, the childhood lover of Xuan Di, was the biggest threat for me to attain his love. Before she was even given a chance to be delivered to the palace by her family, I decided to destroy her purity by assigning my men to drug her and deliver her to one of the official son's bed as promised in exchange of power.

As I was being too caught up with the power that I need to gain, someone else entered Xuan Di's eyes. No, it wasn't a noble lady or a princess from other countries; it was the lowest of the lowest human being, a Novice Servant.

Qing Qing, a lowly born servant that was sent to the palace to work, got Xuan Di's love. Crowned as a Beauty Belle Qing, heavily favoured by Xuan Di and eventually she got pregnant.

How dare a lowly human being liker her deserve Xuan Di's love? What does she have that I do not have? Why can't Xuan Di just look at me for once and he will finally know the value of me?

Unable to contain my jealousy and anger towards her, I tried many ways to get rid of her. The hatred that I harbour became so bad that I want her dead, I want her out of my sight, I want her to disappear from Xuan Di's very eyes. Malicious thoughts and desperate feelings conquered my mind as I drown into this dark world of evilness that I trapped myself in.

However, no matter how I treated her, what unfair reason used to punish her, she will never once show any disobedience. She will quietly obey and adhere to the punishment that I ordered. And this made Xuan Di love her even more for her innocent and kind mind unlike someone so evil like me.

"Why isn't she dead yet? Why can't she just let go of Xuan Di?"

No.. No I can't wait anymore, if I let it go on further, I will lose him forever. I will never get a chance to get his love. One late night, I sent one of the imperial physicians that worked under me to think of ways to let Beauty Belle Qing have a miscarriage without anyone knowing.

With the thought of her that will disappear from my sight, I left my palace with a good mood and well dressed in my Empress attire. Heading towards Xuan Di's study palace, I thought of ways to request for a chance to visit my father, as it has been many years since I last saw him. But before I even reach there, someone drugged and dragged me from the back...

Now I think about it, I am truly disgusting and ruthless. Out of everything that I have done, the first two person that I owe to is my father and brother. A part of me was relief when I saw only my father's head, cause this might mean that my brother is still alive. The third person that I owe to will be Yu-ji, my one and only trusted friend, sister, companion and family that accompanied me through the 2 lives that I had.

Lastly and surprisingly, it will be Qing Qing, someone so innocent that was tortured endlessly by someone like me who was blinded by love and jealousy.

It took me 2 lives to learn a life lesson.

'Things that belong to you, will belong to you.

Things that don't belong to you, no matter how to you steal or force, it will never belong to you.'

I guess it's time for me to put everything down ..

Live a life in peace and atone to my wrongdoings.

Live a life without him.

Live a life to escape from him.