Vile. Void. Vacant.

Those three words haunted Taehyung more so than usual tonight, playing over and over like a song stuck on repeat.

It wasn't as if he'd forgotten the meaning of those words. No, those words stuck with him every day. But today, he was unable to escape them. He was unable to drown them out.

Seeing Jungkook six years after he had spoken those words to Taehyung was yet another catalyst for painful memories.

Jungkook had said Taehyung's love for him was wrong, it was vile. That he didn't contain anything worth loving, that he was void and vacant on the inside.

Taehyung used to hear that all the time from his parents. He had heard it so much it became a daily mantra. But hearing those words come out of Jungkook's mouth, the one person who used to work so hard to convince him otherwise . . .

It destroyed him.

It created V.

Jungkook created V.

After Taehyung left home, he tried so hard to prove his parents and Jungkook wrong. He did everything he could to show himself he was capable of loving and being loved back. He wasn't worthless or a waste of space. He was full of life and love and potential.

But he had been so emotionally exhausted from years of buffering himself against his hateful family. He was so tired from years of acting strong in their presence, only to crumble behind closed doors. In the end, Taehyung had lacked the energy needed to prove them all wrong.

It was easier to become exactly what they expected of him, so he became V.

Vile and void and vacant.

It was easier to be vile and let people think he was beyond reproach. It was easier to be void of emotion, vacant of feelings.

Being those things helped him protect himself from the risk of pain and heartbreak. If no one expected more of him - better of him - he'd have no one to disappoint when he lacked the will to try harder.

It was a shitty way to live and he knew it. But he was terrified. Terrified of taking off the mask, of bringing Taehyung back to life.

If no one knew Taehyung, no one could destroy him again. So he did the cowardly thing and kept the real him locked away instead.

With all that emotional baggage weighing him down, he questioned himself yet again why the hell he chose Jungkook. After the younger hurt him so badly, betrayed his trust, how could he willingly bring him back into his life? His home?

Was this all for revenge? Did he want to just break Jungkook as the younger had broken him?

No.

Not at all.

He knew the answer. He hated himself for it, but he knew why he was doing this to himself.

He never stopped loving Jungkook.

Regardless of what happened six years past, Taehyung would always love Jungkook. His system was wired that way. It was in his DNA.

A part of his heart would always belong to him, even though Taehyung didn't know the person Jungkook was today. Even though he didn't know the man he had become.

But . . . he held out a tiny sliver of hope that the boy he once knew - the one that existed before breaking his heart - was still there. The one who helped Taehyung find the joy in life. The one who was there for him throughout all of his childhood suffering.

The one who dreamt of a brighter and happier future with him.

With that thought, Taehyung let his thoughts turn forward, something they rarely did. And he found himself dreaming that tomorrow would be a brighter and happier day.

Jungkook was also dreaming of his future as he packed his few belongings into a suitcase.

Even though he still had exams, Jungkook decided it was best to leave the dorm now. He had called to tell his parents about his final decision, and to say they had been pissed would be putting it too lightly. He wouldn't be surprised if they showed up at his dorm and dragged him home with them. That was something he was not willing to risk, so he decided to leave while he still could.

His parents certainly tried their best to get Jungkook to change his mind. When threats of pulling tuition and allowance got them no where, they turned to more personal blows. They accused him of throwing away his future for a pointless, selfish goal that would never make him - or their family - successful.

They very well might be right. But Jungkook wasn't going to waste his life letting others make decisions for him.

He did that once and paid the ultimate price.

So he vowed from this day forward, only he was responsible for his future. Only he would decide what was best for him.

He was terrified, naturally, of having no one to fall back on. If this endeavor failed, he might not have anywhere to go. Even still, he wouldn't let fear stop him from chasing his dreams.

So with that, Jungkook left his dorm behind and followed the instructions V's assistants had sent over. He made his way to a luxury apartment building, one of those high rises with a fancy lobby and uniformed security guards. A badge and key awaited him at the front desk, and before he knew it, he was making his way up to the penthouse.

When the elevator reached the top level, the doors opened to reveal a private lobby. It was beautifully decorated, with mirrors lining marbled walls and lush plants adding color. A sturdy looking door was painted a rich blue. It reminded Jungkook of V's hair.

He stood in the lobby, unsure of what to do. He had a key, but was that rude to just let himself in? Would V be annoyed if he knocked, knowing full well he had a key?

Jungkook was saved from making the wrong call - the blue door opened to reveal it's blue haired owner.

V was dressed the most casually Jungkook had ever seen him, with a white oversized shirt and loose black pants. Bare toes stuck out from the hem. Jungkook felt himself smiling, slightly surprised the artist owned such simple clothing.

"Security downstairs called and said you were coming up," V told him. He noted the look on the younger's face. "What?"

Jungkook's eyes went wide. "Nothing. It's just . . . your clothes . . . "

"Did you expect me to wear a velvet house robe with matching slippers?" V asked, looking down at his outfit.

"Maybe?" Jungkook replied. "I mean, that would certainly fit the vibe of this place."

V shook his head. "Well I hope you're not expecting a chef and maids either. I like to fend for myself here."

That surprised Jungkook. He assumed someone like V - famous, wealthy, and notoriously vain - would have countless staff waiting on him hand and foot.

"I can clean up after myself," Jungkook said at last.

"And can you cook?"

Jungkook let out a little laugh. "My attempts leave something to be desired. Or so I've been told."

V rolled his eyes at him, but it appeared to be in a light hearted way. "No kitchen duty for you then. Come on. I'll show you to your room."

Jungkook followed V into the apartment and tried to keep his composure. It was so beautiful, views of the city visible through floor to ceiling windows. The decor was modern but felt homey and artwork decorated most walls.

V gave a quick tour, ending with Jungkook's new bedroom. It may have been labeled as a guest room, but it was the nicest space Jungkook had ever seen.

"Thank you," Jungkook said earnestly, turning to face the artist. "Thank you for everything."

V shrugged his shoulders. "Don't thank me just yet. We don't know how this is going to turn out."

"Hopefully well," the younger responded, setting his things down. "Hopefully this arrangement works out for the both of us."

V nodded once. "I hope you're right."

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》 V A L E N W R I T I N G 《