I walked down the stairs and headed straight for the dining hall where they waited.

Elder Kurona had especially called me in for this dinner event today.Alpha's Initiation Ceremony was just days away.I knew what Elder Kurona wanted from me.

Oh she'll get it today, alright.

Much to my annoyance their gaze filtered over to me as I entered.It was always the same.That hint of fear clinging in the air yet again.

I titled my head to side and bowed mockingly, staring straight into Elder Kurona's eyes.Her pain filled eyes stayed with me until I took my seat.

The stilted silence and tension in the room felt suffocating.

"I am glad you came today ,Zairi." It still bothered me.

"It's Zairiya" I added venomously.Her face contorted into pain.But still she continued"Oh yes,I apologize. Zairiya.I am happy to see you here."

I hated it.The way Elder Kurona still thought she had any right of claim over my emotions.It stabbed my heart every time, I saw her clear gaze with empathy and love for me.I didn't want it, couldn't she understand it.That part of me died with my Ma.Nothing was left now.What was she expecting.?

"Of course Elder Kurona how could I miss it.?Your wishes were pretty clear..?" I relaxed back into the chair and raised a taunting brow at her."Or should I say orders..?"

She sighed heavily.May be trying to adjust to my hostility.

"I have never had any intentions to order you around Zairiya. I just wanted you to have this dinner with us a part of a family and be part of the discussion."

I scoffed and harrumphed.Already looking towards the tray Aiinata was carrying for me.Disrespecting the oldest Elder of the family,showing them just how little it all meant to me.Food was more interesting than this same boring talk of "Family" that Elder Kurona insisted I comply with. Hah.!

"So as I was trying to tell you.We have Alpha's Initiation Ceremony in a few days.I know the same event brought you irreparable loss but I still ask you to forget and.."

"Forget it.?!!" I stood up jarring the table.Placing my hands on the table I glared at her with all the animosity brewing inside me.

"Forget how you ruined my life.Forget how you killed my Ma.And then what..?.?"My voice had dipped low.I could feel the darkness rising and I let it roam freely this time.Let them taste it.The darkness they gave.

"I know what was done was horrible and appalling .Yes, I take responsibility for everything that we did.So if you want to take revenge,punish me,take your anger out on me.But please don't ruin your life over this.Your Ma wouldn't want this for you.Don't you see this.?"

The blood pumped faster in my veins.My insides coiling for another fight.The tension outside started reciprocating with my insides and I burned to let it all out.

"Listen to me child,for the old time's sake. This anger that you store inside is making you wilt from inside.It's rotting your pureness.Let it out child.Don't bear your sadness inside by yourself.If your Ma was here she would have wanted that for you.Why don't you understand? I just want the best for you even if it means I have to hold your grudge against me my whole life.Please let me see the hurt you carry inside.Let me be your shoulder.You always have been the grand daughter, I lost. I never once considered you an outsider.Not just because of Aeran. It's because of Trina and Celine. Please let me in child.Let me repay for the mistake I made by bringing you here."

Several gasps sounded round the table but my eyes didn't stray away from the fragile old woman crying helplessly in front of me.She seemed so small and vulnerable at the moment.

No..its not alright.This won't calm the rage storming inside.

Your apology isn't enough Elder Kurona. I wanted to shout it out.

Holding it in I whispered."So you want to see my pain,Elder Kurona..?You want to know what it feels like to just exist in this futile world with nothing to live on..?Huh..?Is that what you want..?"

I said in my most venomous voice."Let me tell you a story.Elder Kurona."

I moved near the fireplace.Those flames attracting me once again.My voice faraway.

"Once upon a time there lived a girl .Her life was connected to a tree near her small hut where she lived alone.The tree who she believed gave her life.Everything she did was for the tree.She really believed that the tree was magical and could do anything and everything.So she started talking to it.Considering it, the only one in her world.She and her tree.That was the only world she knew and the only world she wanted to be in.

The tree being the only solace in her lonely world.As always she was busy laying out her heart to the tree when something miraculous happened.A prince who had lost his way stumbled up into her world.The foolish girl fell in love with the prince at first sight.She started loving the prince ,wholeheartedly and sincerely.Was even ready to give her life for him if asked.Now the tree wasn't the only one that could give her peace.The place in her heart that was reserved for the tree was now divided.But the girl paid no heed.

Her heart was big enough for two so she took the challenge of fitting both of them inside.Never once realizing the horrible outcome of such a task.That was her devotion.Her love.Her prayer.Even though the girl loved the prince with all her heart,the prince didn't acknowledge her existence,no matter what she did.He didn't reciprocate her feelings.

One day a fairy godmother came and taking in the plight of the foolish girl's one sided love granted her wish.The girl could now fulfill all her dreams.Live the life she wanted with her prince in it.Find the happiness she always craved.A companion. She was finally getting someone to share her griefs and joys with.Someone to share her hut and heart with."

The flames enchanted me more.I stopped to admire them seeing the girl clearly in it.Her smile,her happiness,her delight.

Seeing my lost self in it.

I continued on after a while."The prince married the girl.And the girl couldn't have asked for more.She left the tree that gave her life and happily followed the prince for her happily ever after."

I laughed with no emotions."Indeed a Happily Ever After."

"The girl now found herself in a new world with new people.And her excitement knew no bounds.The girl was finally having her dream come true.A family.That's what she was getting..

....Or so she believed.The reality was much more harsh than her silly dreams.Her new family scorned the foolish, wild girl they thought her to be.They couldn't accept her existence among-st themselves.They were far much superior than her inferior self.So it was impossible for them to accept her as a part of their elite circle.The foolish girl finally saw the reality as it was.But she didn't let it dispirit it.

She turned to the prince as her last plea in this foreign world.But the prince shoved her away from himself ,from his land.He didn't want her.He never wanted her because he was already in love with another. It wasn't his choice to marry the girl but just a compulsion.A dutiful son following his mother's orders. The prince jilted the oaths of love and security he promised the girl.Breaking her heart little by little every single day."

I stopped gain as an uncomfortable feeling twisted my insides.I saw myself in those flames.

"The girl now smiled less.Her face showed the grief she carried.The loneliness that her heart felt.Feeling helpless and alone,her hope died.At last,the girl lost her smile.Her soul started withering away as each day passed.And this in turn made the tree wither as well.It's leaves started falling.The once green giant was now shriveled and old.All because the girl left it.The tree could feel the sadness of the girl.The lifelessness that now crowded her soul.So the tree cried for the lonely girl who was left alone in the foreign world.The tree knew about the betraying nature of the humans.Their corruption. Their malice.Their lies.Their hatred.Their cruelness.The tree was aware of it all but it didn't want to break the little girl's heart and so had let her go.But now felt stupid for letting her go and called for her to come back."

"The girl had started to forget what it meant to be happy.What it meant to smile so when she heard the tree's call she ran away.Leaving behind the prince and his people.She ran to the only true friend she had.The tree.Her life giver.Finally uniting with the tree,the girl found the real joy she had missed in the foreign world.Her smile returned slowly.She started living again.Forgetting about the cruelness of the people of the foreign land.She forgave them and lived her life in blissful days."

A sudden bout of anger ignited my soul as I let the words flow out.My eyes turned red.I turned to my stupefied audience who still sat where they were.My eyes went to him.And I knew he saw it all.

"The people of the foreign land were jealous and felt insecure of the lonely little girl.Of the wonder that existed in nature.They couldn't handle this small miracle that connected two lives.They couldn't understand it.And that which they could not understand made them scared.Fear the noble bond between the girl and the tree.So they planned to destroy it.Take everything from that girl who boasted of such connection.They tried taking away the only thing that defined her existence."

I walked to the table slowly encircling the lot of them as I stared them down.No one could meet my gaze.

"Do you know what they did Elder Kurona..??"

I stared straight into her eyes."They cut the innocent tree that gave her life."

The red started gathering with shades of black.I didn't stop it.The air felt charged.The tension colliding with this new wave of anger emanating from me.

"The girl couldn't believe and didn't wanted to accept this cruelness she saw.She tried stopping them but no use.She crumbled as she saw them cutting the tree down.She pleaded.She cried.She begged.But no one stopped and finally in front of her eyes.The tree fell and died.RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER EYES,it was killed and she couldn't even do anything."

"Zairi.." Elder Kurona was sobbing.She stood up to come and comfort me but I interrupted before Elder Kurona could say or do anything.I retraced my steps back to the fireplace to find comfort in those flames.

"It was then that the girl lost a part of herself.The life, the joy died inside of her.They thought it will kill her as well if the tree died.But things aren't always as they seem.The girl didn't die as they expected.Instead she rose as a phoenix.With absolute power that was scary.Now a new emotion took root in her.A darkness she never knew existed inside her, took hold of her.The old foolish girl died with the tree and in it's place emerged a new one, ready to punish all who used and betrayed her trust and love.The innocence was all corrupted now.It was dark and hollow.The place where her heart used to be.She had nothing left.She didn't feel anything other than hatred and anger.Her pain was lost somewhere in between."

"

I stopped talking and turned again.Elder Kurona gasped as she saw me.I looked at others to see the same reaction.

It was then I felt the wetness on my right cheek.I lifted my finger to wipe the lone tear that had managed to escape my eyes without my knowledge.My finger came away bloodied.I stared at it a minute .

Reminiscing how Ma had once promised to cry these tears in my stead.

The red tears of blood.