"Here it comes. My inevitable death, ignoring me all those years when I wished for it daily, arriving only after I've decided I want to live forever."- Isaac Marion

Ya know how they say you feel when your time is coming? I chuckled and shook my head as I stared down at the notepad that was placed in my line of sight. They say death is inevitable, but I would like to say that I have beat or cheated death more than once in my life. But this time? I don't think I can cheat on it. It's my time and I know it. I made my bed, and now it's time for me to lay in it. Yea, I could ask my parents for the money, but I don't want to do that because nothing will change. I shook my head as I thought about my family. I let everybody down, including myself. My parents made sure I didn't want for a damn thing and I took that shit for granted. Even though my future was very bright, I dabbled in a lifestyle I had no business dabbling in.

Bouncing around from city to city trying to find my purpose. Looking in all the wrong places. I shook my head and stared ahead.

I really wish I was able to turn things around, but I know I can't. There is no coming back from this. Powerful people don't play with their money, and I was aware of this, but I didn't care at the time.Looking back down at the notepad in front of me, I chuckled bitterly as I picked up the pen. I held it in my right hand and started writing.. Dear Binky,

It took me about two hours to write my letters to my loved ones. I started with Bink first because he's the main one I owe an apology to. I treated my brother like dirt over the past few years, and I truly regret it. It was supposed to be him and me, but instead I was against him. I folded up each letter and placed them into individual envelopes. I wrote their names and stacked them up. I stood from the table and looked around my little space I called home, sighing. I had packed everything up the night before, so it wouldn't be a hassle when my parents arrived. I gave my landlord a letter telling him to notify my parents if I didn't return in a week.

I threw on some clothes and left my apartment. I might as well enjoy a hot meal since it's going to be my last.

Information about a body being found had come across the news, and yes, it was Nerrick. His body and head were found exactly a week later. He had owed a powerful man some money and since Nerrick could not afford to pay his debt, he was decapitated.

As the landlord watched the news he shook his head once was he realized who the person was. He grabbed his cane and stood up from his chair—walking into the kitchen. He shuffled through some papers until he found the one he was looking for.

The landlord sighed as he thought about what he was about to do. Grabbing his landline, he dialed the number that was provided for him. Nerrick had given the landlord his mother's work number instead of personal because he knew she wouldn't answer any unknown calls. The phone rung about three times before she picked up.

"Sasha Hayes, Real Estate and Construction."

The landlord cleared his throat. "Hello. Are you Nerrick's mother?"

"Yes, that will be me. May I ask who is speaking?"

"I'm his landlord and he told me to call you if he didn't return home in a week. He didn't and I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the Atlanta PD has found his body."

"Oh my god! My baby! How did they know it was him?"

"His identification was on him."

"Oh my goodness. Not my baby lord! I'll be to Atlanta as soon as I can."

"Okay, I am truly sorry for your loss."

"Thank you."

With that being said, Mama Sasha hung up her phone and looked at the wall ahead. It was around ten o'clock at night, and she was sitting in her home office finalizing some contracts when she received the heartbreaking phone call. She was sad, but she knew it was coming. Sasha didn't know exactly what her oldest son was into, but she knew it was not good at all. Grabbing her personal phone, Sasha dialed Essence's number and, to little avail, she didn't answer. Sash hung up and dialed Cameron's. It rang about three times before it was picked up.

"Hey ma!"

Sash smiled and sniffed once she realized it was Bri. "Brielle! Hey baby, where's Bink?"

Now alarmed on the other end, Bri sat up in the bed. "He's downstairs. Is everything okay?"

Mama Sash shook her head and placed her hand across her chest. "Sadly no, can you stay on the phone and go get him please?"

Nodding her head as if Ms. Sasha could see her. "Yes ma'am, hold on."

As Sasha waited for Bri to retrieve Cameron, Sash thought about her eldest child and wondered where she went wrong. Andre and Sasha made sure their kids had everything from emotional support to unconditional love. What was Nerrick missing? What was lacking? Little did Sasha know, what was wrong with Nerrick was within himself, and he was the only one that truly knew what was wrong with him. There was nothing she or anybody could do. Sash was pulled from her thoughts as Brielle spoke through the receiver.

"Okay Ma, he's up here with me."

"Is he sitting down? Make him sit down, Bri, please, and put me on speaker." Sash shook her head because she knew her youngest was about to take this hard. No matter what Cameron said about his brother, she knew he truly loved him and wanted a relationship with him. Unfortunately, it was too late.

"It's on speaker ma."

Sash shook her head as the tears rolled down her face. "Bink?"

"I'm here ma, why you crying?"

"It's Nerrick baby. He was killed."

Sash literally felt her heart ache as she heard her babyboy cry. She shook her head and cried with him. "Lord get us through this," she whispered to herself. "Bri!"

"Yes ma'am?"

"Can I come over? Cause I know he's in no shape to drive out this way."

"Absolutely! You don't even have to ask, see you in a little." Bri hung up the phone and Sash sighed shaking her head as she stood up from her chair.

Making her way out of the office, she headed down the hall to her husband's. Knocking on the door before twisting the knob and walking in. "Andre."

Mr. Hayes looked up from his twenty-seven-inch iMac and looked at his wife. He removed his glasses and waved her over. "What's wrong?"

Sasha shook her head, covering her mouth as she cried. She took a couple of deep breaths before looking her husband in the face through her cloudy vision. "Atlanta PD found Nerrick's body."

"Sasha, stop playing with me." Andre frantically grabbed his phone and dialed Nerrick's number. He looked up at his wife's face, and her heart broke at the look on his face.

"Sash, why is he not answering?"

Sasha shook her head and walked over behind his desk. She stood between his legs and wrapped her arms around him as he cried into her stomach. They both knew this day would come one day, but not this soon. Sasha rubbed her husband's head as he cried. She bit her lip to suppress the scream that was fighting to be released from her throat.

"Come on, Dre. I'm about to get ready and go to Cam's." Sasha pulled from his embrace and smiled weakly in his face.

Dre grabbed both of her hands and rubbed his fingers across her knuckles, something he had done for the last thirty years to comfort her. He gave her hands a tight squeeze and stood, pulling her into a hug. Lord what he did he do that for because Sash literally broke to her knees. She cried and screamed while punching Dre's chest. "My baby lord! Why my baby!"

Dre caught her and they both slid to the floor, crying together.

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