A/N:

Many of the readers in some of my works are questioning why I write Engineering gang friendship more than the Craz-Doc's. It's not because I am not fond of Phana and Kit, but mostly because I have an Engineering background myself and understand how it works —including the SOTUS thing, more than how it works among Medical students. So....

Anyway, when he became the Moon of Engineering in the story " even though I didn't detail on it.

*

Kongpob sends a text in his phone. To SOTUS 1234 group chat.

Forth closes his eyes and takes a long deep breath.

Beam coughs nervously. "Yeah, well, I tried to sing and nearly broke the glass because my pitch was far from perfect. It missed all the tones possible since the first tone."

Someone chuckles.

Beam coughs again. "And I really can't play any musical instrument, not even a clarinet."

Someone coughs.

Another sneezes.

Many from the audience seem to have a bad cold, well...

Beam brushes his nose with the back of his palm. "I don't have any training in karate, judo, boxing, or anything related, moreover, even though I sometimes get involved in a real fight because I somehow end up causing trouble to myself and my best-friends too."

"Asshole!" Someone yells.

Beam frowns his eyebrows. "Yeah. Usually, I have been called that during fighting. But also, apparently even guys call me that because of my big mouth, and some girls appreciate this bigness of the other parts or my body."

"Love you, Beammie!" a girl yells.

There are at least 10 death sentences that Kongpob has sent to Forth in the SOTUS 1234 already.

"... actually, I have a talent. More of a gift, actually. But it very related to the big thing that the girls are fond of me and it would be illegal to show it on the stage, so..."

"Kyaaa!!!" Girls start screaming.

"Boooo!!!!" The boys scream harder.

Engineering 4th year students grit their teeth.

Engineering 3rd year are facepalming themselves.

Engineering 2nd year are still trying to wake up from the nightmare in front of them, especially Ming.

Engineering freshmen are planning to throw Beam in the fire during SOTUS closing this weekend and also maybe throw him to the sharks in the sea.

Phana wants to make a grilled Beam anytime.

Kit makes a WOW with his lips.

Wayo's eyes widen in shock.

Beam laughs.

"... yeah. So, I decided I'll at least make use of the next best thing I have, my big mouth," Beam says.

"Don't tell me this is a stand up comedy! You're not funny at all, not even a bit!" Someone yells.

Beam is still smiling. "No. This is not. I thought about that, but I am not really funny. So... I will tell a story."

"Yeah!! Tell us about Cinderella!!!" Someone yells sarcastically.

Forth presses hard on his nose bridge. He should've let Beam make a poem.

Beam takes a long deep breath. "It is so easy to be an asshole," he says with a sad smile.

No one yells this time.

Beam takes another long deep breath. "So, I'm gonna tell you a story of the biggest asshole I know."

Beam pauses just in case anyone wants to send more yells at him again. But no one yells or 'booo's him, so...

"Have you ever heard about the Engineering barbaric tradition which they call as SOTUS and these Engineering bastards treat themselves in a brotherhood and sisterhood bond?" Beam asks.

That's it. Forth dies.

There are too many Engineering students in the Auditorium and no one responses. They still want to live for another day.

Even the five judges on the table in front of the stage want to stop Beam right there. That's a sensitive matter!!

"Not even the Dean can stop them. You know why?" Beam asks the question that he knows no one will answer. "... because it actually works."

Silence.

Kongpob blinks.

Forth is looking at the stage again.

And that's how Beam begins his story.

"I, you, all of us here have friends. Best friends. But Engineering students...? They have this bond that other Faculty doesn't have. Yes, they're crazy, yes they love to break the rules but they unbelievably love each other like a one big happy family."

"But people outside the Engineering often misunderstand them. And this is why I am telling the story. Because they're a group of beautiful people who are mostly misunderstood and take the blame for any trouble that involves around them. This is what the story is about. And, any of you can stop me and is free to ask me anything in between."

Silence.

Beam gulps. Maybe this is a bad idea. But he can't back off now.

"No one will ask anything?" Beam gulps.

"You should give us some advise about your sex life, dude!" Someone yells.

"Yeah! You are a living dream of every man. Tell me about that!" Another adds.

"No. That won't be apropriate and..."

"Tell us how to flirt!" Another yells.

"But... I can't... flirt," Beam says nervously.

"Bullshit!!!"

"The girls don't just drop down from the sky. Now, do they?"

Beam just shakes his head.

"Give relationship advice then!" A girl yells.

"I have never been in a relationship before. I don't know how it works," Beam says. "So... let's just talk about SOTUS, okay...?"

No one is boo-ing on that. The Engineering students are clearly in the room and nobody wants to arouse their anger further.

"Okay. I am so nervous right now," Beam continues. "People actually make a living by motivating other people, maybe I should do that motivation shit or just read 10 sentences of a poem instead of this but... just bear with me and hold your fire. Don't kill me yet." Beam lets out his nervousness.

He takes a long deep breath.

"Let's get back to the asshole thing I said earlier," Beam says. "Every one of us is an asshole."

Sighs.

"An asshole is a person who fucks and leaves the next day without caring about their sex partner's feeling.

An asshole is a person who cheats on their lover.

An asshole is a person who leaves their friend in need.

An asshole is a person who steals their friend's lover or crush.

An asshole is a person who borrows their friend's vehicle and gets it back dirty and with an empty tank.

An asshole is a person who borrows a lighter and never gives it back.

An asshole is a person who forgot to flush the public toilet.

An asshole is a person who always shows up at a party but never holds any.

An asshole is a person who forgets their parent's birthday.

An asshole is a person who splashes water at passing strangers on the road when there is heavy raining.

An asshole is a person who cuts the queue.

An asshole is a person who puts a chewed bubble-gum on a public chair.

An asshole is a person who litters and doesn't throw the garbage in the trash-can."

Beam takes a deep breath. "Every one of us is an asshole. Either super asshole or a tiny teeny asshole. But all of us are."

He said wha...

"... Engineering faculty has 8 Majors. Each one of them has about 100 - 150 students every year. They have 1000 freshmen in total for a year. Can you imagine these thousand assholes living peacefully if they bond only for the 3 days of the light orientation like the other faculties?

They are gonna end up fighting with each other.

Too many assholes at one place.

Someone will steal someone's lovers.

Someone will break someone's heart.

Someone will bump into someone's shoulder and ignore saying sorry because they are in a rush.

Someone will scratch someone's car in the parking lot.

Everyday will be a battle field—a new day for a war. Mechanicals will fight with the Electricals. Civil students will break as many hearts as possible of Architecture students. Geology guys will throw rocks at the Chemical branch guys...

It will be ... chaotic."

Kongpob tilts his head.

Forth blinks.

"SOTUS," Beam continues.

"Seniority.

Order.

Tradition.

Unity.

Spirit."

"SOTUS makes these assholes from one Major know and bond with the assholes from the other Majors.

SOTUS makes these entire group of assholes of one year to be united because they have the bigger assholes—their seniors."

Kongpob flinches.

"... On the other hand, this allows the seniors to control their little assholes, the juniors, easily."

Beam pauses for a breath.

"A love triangle between the assholes in the Engineering Faculty would not turn into a wild Major war. Believe me, it happens a lot. Especially because the Architecture girls keep having two Engineering boyfriends or some Industrial girls who study at the same building as Mechanical keep making some Civil girls jealous. And also most of the time, Engineering boys can't control their dick. Like, seriously.

On top of that, there are only 3 girls for 7 boys, so, having lovers is a real war there."

A small chuckle is starting to be heard here and there. Mostly from the Architecture and Industrial girls because they know it's true.

Even some Mechanical boys start to smirk.

Some Civil girls make time to show their middle fingers to their 'frenemies' in the Industrial though.

Aim smirks too. He has faith in his favorite junior.

Even Kongpob looks at him, un-amused and that makes Aim smirk wider.

Beam coughs again before he continues.

"People see Engineering students as barbaric people. Like Spartan in 300. Well, they are not wrong. Engineering students have too much of energy because hell, just to get a seat in the food-court, you have to have that power. There are even some tables that you can't sit unless invited. Like, seriously, it is nothing less to a Mob!"

Yeah. Everyone knows whose tables those are. Kongpob's and Forth's.

"They even have the Sports week thing four times a year inside their Faculty between Majors and years just have to keep channelling their boiling blood, otherwise, they probably will kill each other."

Park and Max grin at that last statement.

"Yeah, they have their own way of handling their business and keeping the kingdom as peaceful as they can.

But what people don't know is that...

the boys are Rambos with the heart of Romeo while the girls are Juliets with the power of Xena.

They are all barbaric cheesy assholes. And I can prove it.

Because, they have this."

Beam clicks a button between his fingers and suddenly a giant picture of SOTUS gear emblem on its leather bracelet appears on the screen behind.

Kongpob raises his eyebrows. He has already stopped typing the vicious murderous messages on the SOTUS 1234 group.

Forth is locking his eyes on Beam since his third sentences and only blinks for a few times, now and then.

"A gear. Engineering symbol with SOTUS words crafted on it," Beam says in such a mystical whisper, "But it's in fact, not just that."

Silence.

Beam sure has a way of telling a story.

"Every Engineering student that finishes SOTUS has it. I don't have it with me right know because I haven't finished it, so as far as I can do is present its picture. But I already know what it is and what it represents," Beam says in a calmer voice since he has already overcome his nervousness. Damn. This Auditorium can handle these many people? The fuck!

"The gear is one of the engineering mechanical devices in the cogwheel system. Having one signifies that we are Engineering students, however we have to go through the SOTUS to prove that we deserve it. It's very important for us. Thus, the gear is in our heart and our heart is in our gear.

If any Engineering Student asks anyone to take care of his gear, it means that person is asking you to take care of his/her heart," Beam explains.

"Whooa... really?"

"That's cheesy."

"The hell...?"

"I suddenly want an Engineering boyfriend."

Are the comments that can be heard from the audience who belong to non-Engineering faculties.

And, that puts a hell of a proud smile on the Engineering students face.

"So... that's the story about assholes who are more than what everyone thinks they are..." Beam closes the story. "Sorry that I can't deliver the story as interesting as it possibly can be.

I am too nervous because... one, I am pretty sure P'Forth, my Head Hazer is going to kill me after this.

Two, he will probably do that with the help of P'Ming who is my senior Moon of Engineering and last year's Campus Moon because I probably messed this up very badly and...

Three, I have to run 100 laps and do 1000 push-ups if I lose this battle."

Silence.

"Thank you for your time." Beam closes the mike.

Super awkward silence.

"Ain't you gonna open a session for Question and Answers or what?" Someone yells.

"Yeah...! Why don't you?" His friend yells too.

Beam blinks. "Uhm... sure. What do you want to ask?"

"You're Beam Baramee and was once a second-year Medical student, weren't you?" He is one of the Geography boys. "Why did you drop your two years of education in Medicine to begin as Engineering freshman?"

"Owh? That?" Beam smiles, he recognizes that boy from Geography. "I did say that I'm one of the assholes. I used to play a lot, with girls, sometimes they are another man's girlfriend. Although in my defense, I always ask whether they are single or have a lover but they are just like any other loser ... they lie... So I do what I do. And end up having fight after fight with jealous boyfriends and some of them brought an army to get to me.

Just like our last encounter, eh, Mike?"

That Mike just looks at Beam in anger.

"I was saved by the wolves pack here," Beam pointed towards Forth's direction. "After that, I wanted to get into the wolf pack. The idea was to get them to have my back when that kind of problem occurs again," Beam continues. "That's why I enrolled in Engineering."

Kongpob starts typing again. His texts with his death orders flood in the SOTUS 1234 group.

Aim finally loses his faith in Beam.

Wad and Tiew close their eyes in despair.

Lam makes a WOW. Amazed on how Beam makes trouble after trouble, as easy as breathing. He steals a glance at his best friend from high school who is now looking down in defeat.

Forth is giving up his life.

"I figured out his talent," Max says, suddenly.

"What?" - Tul asks.

"Trouble is his talent," Max whispers back, shaking his head, looking at Beam who is oblivious to all the uproar he has caused with his last few words.

"Indeed." Tul agrees.

***

A/N:

Yeah... I know... he messed up. Super bad.

Not what did each of you expect, huh?

Yeah... well...

Thanks for your help proofreading it, @Darzls . Don't leave me because I messed up, okay?