Analysis complete. Guardian Powers active. New subjects have appeared.

So. Samuel James Tolliver had somehow passed on his powers to others. He was not as foolish as he appeared. Well, no matter. Her forces were powerful and plentiful. They would swarm over the pitiful defenses these weak fools were erecting, and crush any and all opposition they found.

And then, once the blood and dust had settled, she would ensure they brought the still-unconscious Samuel James Tolliver back to her, in her hidden place, where she would take great pains to peel from him the information she needed.

And if he didn’t have it, she’d just have to find those who did. Perhaps those he guarded. Or perhaps those other strange presences she felt, circling around the edges of her awareness like minnows treading water around a shark. Surely one of them would be able to supply her the information she required.

Part of her attention diverted from the armed conflict about to erupt and returned to Samuel James Tolliver, asleep and in grave danger within his own dreamscape. Those strange Guardian Protocols were protecting him from her somewhat, despite her best efforts and those of her dreamwardens.

Well, no matter. She would just—

Power flowed again, tracing through the Essence from somewhere nearby. Her attention spun, sought, found, focused…

What?

* * *

“Ho-kay,” Sam turned slowly, letting his dream eyes adjust to the blasted hellscape that had formed around him, and to the demonic shadows that were surging towards him.

He remembered crashing. Remembered giving Nat those medallions and, he hoped, coherent instructions on what to do with them. And he remembered blackness closing in, which presumably was unconsciousness claiming him. But he had no memory of waking up, and given the strangeness of everything around him, and that had happened to him up to this point…

Yeah, so, this is a dream.

But that voice had been real. He couldn’t tell how he knew, but that didn’t change the fact. That hadn’t been something conjured up out of his nightmares, that was someone from the outside reaching in. Into his head, his thoughts, his dreams.

He’d heard stories about this kind of thing. Bards’ tales about men and women trapped in their own minds while their bodies withered away sleeping in the real world. In the stories, they were always helpless or unaware of their plight. Or they faced some kind of overwhelming evil that had more power than they could counteract.

His hand went down to his belt, and there was the comfortable heft of Thumb Bane just waiting to be drawn.

I give you one last chance, the voice rumbled through the dream reality like the voice of every god in existence. Surrender or be—

“So here’s the thing,” Sam said calmly, interrupting the voice as easily and naturally as if it had been Pearl on a bender. “If you could crush me like a bug, I think you’d have done it already.”

What?

“See, I think I’ve got you pegged. At first I wasn’t sure, but the timing of all this was enough to raise suspicion. You’re Quentin’s mysterious ‘mistress’. The person who declared war on me, right?”

I only responded to your direct threat. The war was yours to begin, but now it is mine to finish.

“What?” Now it was Sam’s turn to sound confused. “Lady, I haven’t talked to you once in my entire life. I’m pretty certain a big sky voice talking to me like I’m its favorite punching bag would have stood out in my memory.”

He paused then and frowned. “Well. Okay, another one. But there’s still only a few of those in my life so it still probably would have been noteworthy.”

You declared yourself my enemy when I reached out to you through the Achievement system. I asked what you did, and you responded with threats.

Sam blinked twice, then on instinct brought up his menu and scrolled back through his achievements.

“Son of a bitch,” he breathed as one specific achievement scrolled into his display.

Achievement Unlocked: What The Hell Did You Just Do?

Description: No, really. What the hell did you just do? Something just happened that sent ripples throughout the entire system, and it wasn't something I was prepared for. And buddy let me tell ya, if you could see the stuff I have going on behind the scenes, you'd understand just what a monumental achievement that is. Hell, I’m not even supposed to be addressing you like this, that’s how big this thing is. It’s making me break rules. And that hasn’t happened in millennia.

Seriously.

What did you do.

Reward: You've gotten my attention.

“This was you?” He looked up from the display and stared up into the red sky. “Is that what you’re telling me? You sent this?”

I did. It was the only avenue open to me at the time.

“But it sounds exactly like the other achievements! How the hell was I supposed to know this was you and not just the regular system thing screwing with me?”

It doesn’t matter anymore. You have declared yourself my enemy, and that must be met with all the force at my command.

“Wait wait wait,” Sam held up his hands. “This was just a misunderstanding! There’s no need for—“

Enemies must be crushed. This world must be perfect. You have declared yourself an enemy, an aberration, a stain that must be cleansed. My processes are very clear on this point. Perhaps, had you not reacted so, things might be different. But my path forward is very clear. I will crush you and all you command and restore order in this world.

Oh hell it’s a zealot. Sam winced as the realization struck. Whatever this was—and lord didn’t it just sound like Cora or Sally when they were talking in the White Room. That couldn’t possibly be a coincidence—it clearly had more than a screw loose upstairs.

But there probably wasn’t anything he could do to change its mind, either.

Okay then.

“In that case,” he said, crossing his arms and glaring up at the red sky, “let me tell you what I think. I think you can’t crush me, or you’d have done it already. I think you’re not as powerful as you make yourself out to be, or your power has a different shape that can’t take me down just as easy as that.”

He stopped as a new thought occurred to him, and a slow smile started to spread on his face. “And, come to think of it, I think I have more power in here too.”

Thumb Bane was there. He’d been able to access the Menu. Neither of those things were likely in just a random dream. And even better, the menu functioned just like it had with his glasses on. His full display was right there, hovering in front of his gaze no matter where he turned.

In fact…

The voice was saying something, but he ignored it and instead turned to the nearest hell-creature. It was a tall, shadowy figure with more horns than arms, and more arms than eyes. It slavered at spat at him but made no move to come close while the voice was talking. He bracketed it, and cast Identify on it. And time slowed noticeably as the text came up.

Name: Dreamforged Horror

Race: Sleep Elemental

Sub-Race: Summoned Creature

Essence Level: 6

HP: 350

MP: 200

Description:

Freddy wishes he had this kind of mojo.

Dreamforged Horrors are creatures conjured up out of the ether by Dreamwardens, a special class of mage that specializes—as you might have guessed—in sleep magic. They have no mind of their own, are utterly under the control of their masters, and yet somehow also manage to project an air of pure hatred of anything living.

Also it probably wants you dead. Very dead. And it’s probably faster than you are.

Next time maybe don’t skimp on the coffee when there’s a Dreamwarden around.

Combat Data:

—Dreamwalk: Dreamforged Horrors can enter into the dreams of any unconscious person. If the person is not dreaming, the Dreamforged Horror can force the unconscious person into dreamstates for 2 hours.

—Freddy’s Fingers: Any injury inflicted by a Dreamforged Horror is replicated in the waking world. If these injuries result in death in the dream world, the host dies in the waking world.

—Fluid form: Dreamforged Horrors can shift forms once every 3 minutes into anything they desire, gaining the strengths and weaknesses of that form. Higher level Dreamforged Horrors can shift into larger or more dangerous creatures.

The description would have been terrifying a week ago, but now it just felt like Tuesday, and didn’t even get his heartrate up. In fact, as the words stopped scrolling and time sped back up, he felt a grin creeping across his face.

He looked down at himself again. Thumb Bane was a reassuring weight on his hip. His harness sat tight and strapped over his clothes, the quiet blue glow of the mana lights pushing back the red glow of the dreamscape. A quick check showed that his guardian powers were still there—but many of them, the ones he’d used the Tinkerer to transfer to others, were grayed out. Well, he’d known that would happen. The higher tiers of the skill allowed him to pass Tinkered powers to more people, and to retain their use for himself.

In short, he was armed, armored, and loaded, in a place his enemy had dragged him to. And he didn’t even feel tired anymore.

—Are you even listening to me?

The voice sounded peeved, and Sam suddenly realized that she must have been talking the entire time, and he’d completely tuned her out.

“Nope!” he said cheerfully. “But since you’re here, I have a question for you.”

… What is it?

She sounded so suspicious. Probably with good reason.

“If I kill a Dreamwarden in here, do they die in real life? And if I kill enough of them, do I get to wake up?”

WHAT?

Thumb Bane made a hissing noise as he slid its haft out of the metal belt loop. All around him the Horrors lurched forward, shifting and melting into dozens of different creatures, all with glowing red eyes and some variation on the theme of ‘fangs and claws’.

“You see,” he said as he activated his harness and jacked up both his strength and his mass, “you’ve made what we in the business call a ‘tactical error’. You think you’ve trapped me here, away from my friends, and are going to either hold me until I surrender or kill me.

“But I’ve got my powers, my gear, my levels, and I’m feeling better than I have in days. So, instead of surrendering, I think I’m gonna kick the shit out of these horror things, kill all your Dreamwardens, and then wake up and help my friends kick your ass in the real world.

“How’s that sound to you?”

And without waiting for an answer, Sam Tolliver gave a whooping laugh of a battle cry and hurled himself hammer-first at the nearest Horror.