《Cheaters Always Win》40. Pimp my Armor!
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Luck is a woman, for she is drawn to those who least deserve her
~ a Highland poet, date unknown
A knock on his door alerted Chester, and he wondered if he should try to hide his current project. But he knew that trying to hide something would be much more suspicious. He called for the person to come in, revealing a familiar child with tired, obsidian eyes. It looked as though the vampire prince had stayed up for most of the night without any rest.
"...What are you doing?" Damien asked. He stared at the man in the process of stitching together the suit from the sewer treatment facility.
"I got this suit from a dwarf, but it was too short so I grabbed two and am currently readjusting them to fit me. I need some variety in my wardrobe."
"I didn't know you could sew. In fact, I didn't know you could do much of anything aside from lie and steal."
"You son of a...Goes to show just how much you know me." Chester stitched up the sleeve of the suit with surprisingly good quality. "Don't underestimate what you can do with a thread and needle. This isn't something you learn from your posh homeschooling. This is street smarts."
Damien scoffed and rolled his eyes, but he was quietly impressed by the speed and expertise the human displayed when tailoring the suit. Chester had managed to patch it together with only a few details being asymmetrical. The thick brown suit, along with the zipper along the center, didn't look like the work of an amateur at all.
"So why'd you come here? Other than to insult me, of course."
"I just came to check up on you. Just finished dealing with all the intruders, but they all got the same results as me. No leads on the people responsible, but we're working on it."
"So much for the best defenses in the world." The illusionist muttered. He didn't take his eyes off his work, making sure that the seams were airtight and no liquid could come in and leak through the outfit once he delved into the sewers. "I guess I should prepare for an invasion then?"
Damien shook his head fervently. He wanted to defend his family and the kingdom's competence, knowing that Chester was prone to bias and rash opinions with little knowledge of the subject. "Doubt it. Say all you want, but General Drake and the others are more than enough. Not to mention the Archibishop, but he seems to be averse to public appearances. Invasion or not it would take a dedicated force to break through the castle defenses."
The man shrugged. He didn't think anything serious would happen this time around. It was far too unlikely for chaos to occur four times consecutively.
"A bandit raid in Pesodonia, the auction house disaster in Elway, a war against ankhegs in Stillwater, and a siege in Welton? Clearly one of us is bad luck. And it isn't me; I'm a blessing from the heavens." Chester said dramatically, flipping his hair and smirking condescendingly at the younger boy. He noted that his hair was growing and wondered if he could fashion a metal headband using his Attainium.
"Oh, shut it. If you're doing alright, I guess I'll leave you to it. Have fun."
Their interaction was short and brief. Chester was glad that he didn't look too deeply into how or why he had the sewer suit. After fifteen minutes, it was done. He admired the suit; made of thick, brown, leather and perfectly tailored to his size. Chester tested out the zipper and made sure they connected perfectly. After making some minor adjustments, he cut the thread off by forming a sharp edge with his Attainium. The iridescent metal slipped back under his shirt once he finished with the item and he folded it neatly and stuck it under the bed.
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The guest quarters they had given to him were lavish, more so than the one they stayed at in Elway. With the ceiling three meters in the air in a rounded shape, it was very gothic, with silky white curtains covering the windows. Oakwood was used to create the frames of most furniture, showcasing the superiority of dwarven architecture in comparison to Elway. It was much more decorative than most, and the only building that came close in comparison was the Lanes Auction House. Chester stared at the clock in his room, seeing that it was almost noon.
'She should be done by now.'
He left his quarters and searched for Alda, which wasn't too difficult as the hallway for the guest quarters led directly to her own office. The man rapped his knuckles on the door before having it opened by the shorter woman. Her hair was done much more fashionably, and he could see that the hardened female warrior had taken the time to put on a subtle amount of make-up.
"You're late. Not like I was waiting for you, or anything like that though." She mumbled, crossing her arms in faux irritation.
"Yes, yes, sure you weren't. Ready to go to Jerry? You look exceptionally pretty today."
"Mhm. Honestly, the fact you got a commission from him is significant in and of itself. He's kind of picky with who he makes his armor for." She didn't acknowledge his compliment apart from a small smile gracing her face. Chester had a funny feeling in his heart after that.
"Why is that? Is it cuz I'm so exceptional and talented?" They walked side by side, heading together to the massive dome-shaped forge further ahead. The city was at peak activity, with adventurers and civilians wandering alike. Chester had his bag slung across one shoulder, organizing it so his items didn't get mixed up together in the extra-dimensional storage.
"No, he's the sort that makes new gadgets or tinkers with new concepts, and a lot of people aren't keen on having prototypical equipment. Having them malfunction during a fight is a death sentence, after all."
Chester considered that but didn't see much risk in the idea of grappling hook gloves. Even if the wire snapped, he didn't see much chance of him getting hurt unless he was swinging from seven stories high. The idea of relying on a flimsy gadget to take him over something like a wide canyon was stupidly risky and he didn't think he'd do that unless it was between life or death.
"The commission from him isn't the riskiest item. It's genius, actually. I feel like me and him are two peas in a pod."
She nodded as they neared Welton's Furnace. "Regardless of his reputation, he's a master through and through. Every single master has received Arber's seal of approval, having to prove themselves after a rigorous examination. The road to being a master blacksmith takes a decade at minimum, and nobody other than Arber himself has reached that qualification in such a short span of time."
Chester gave the half-dwarf a cheeky smile. "Look at you, my own personal historian." He said teasingly. She flushed and gave him a small slap. Due to her innate strength and the metal gloves she wore, it shaved off 1 HP from his status.
"Is it so uncommon for someone to be in touch with their culture?! You're annoying."
He laughed it off as they ascended to the top floors. They took the stairs, and Alda pointed out numerous people of interest, along with the purpose and history behind each floor. Chester didn't know where she got all the time to study this when she was responsible for the palace defenses. The fact that she was willing to spend her time with her nose in a book during her spare time astounded him. For a brief moment, the word 'love' appeared in his mind.
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'God. C'mon Chester! Get a hold of yourself! You're a stud, a stallion, a womanizer! You can't be tied down to one woman. Even though we're physically compatible, get along well, and she lives in a nice royal palace...DAMN IT!'
He was feeling the temptation. Chester wasn't unfamiliar with the feeling of infatuation and had many times where he was hyper-focused on a woman and tried to keep a relationship going. But he knew that eventually, it wouldn't work out. His inconsistent nature, nomadic personality, and habit of ogling other women had been a deal-breaker on several occasions. The criminal didn't feel like ruining the relationship they had right now and didn't want to overcomplicate things when he still wanted to see what the world had to offer.
Chester looked at her once more, seeing the way she talked, and smiled as she recalled a funny story regarding an apprentice blacksmith. Her heart-shaped face, curly, fiery-red hair, and green eyes came together to construct a masterpiece; the longer he stared, the more he noticed. Dimples as she smiled mirthfully, and how her eyelashes fluttered-
"We're here. Hello?" Alda waved her hand on his face, going on her tippy-toes and getting the man's attention. She looked at him questioningly, and he took a few moments to gather himself. "You alright?"
"Ah-yeah. I was just too busy staring into your beautiful eyes. My fault." He said flirtatiously, making her eyes roll. She led him to where Jerry's workstation was and obscured her face, but he could see that the tips of her slightly pointed ears had turned pink.
The pink-bearded dwarf was looking at a blueprint before noticing the two come toward him. His eyes widened upon seeing Alda and he gave her a deep bow.
"General Bloodsong! A pleasure to see you!"
"You as well, Sharpax. I accompanied Chester here, I heard you were refining his armor?"
His head shook up and down like a bobblehead, and he went to another table where he unfolded the man's tactical armor. The changes were subtle, but Chester could see where the adjustments occurred even without the system notification. The frame holding the armor together was less flimsy-looking, and points along the joints of the equipment were further reinforced. It was a testament to the blacksmith's ability he managed to improve upon the existing armor while making the upgrades seamless.
Elric's Improved Tactical Armor Suit
- Made from mithril, it boasts great hardiness and durability while also being very light. Created by a talented artificer, it allows for three enchantments to be added to the equipment. Refined by a master blacksmith, it can absorb kinetic energy at a higher level than before.
- Reduces slashing and cutting damage greatly
- Minor resistance to all elements
- Reduced Weight I: The mass of the equipment is reduced by half
- Prestidigitation I: Self-cleaning and remains odor-free.
- Greater Durability I: Further increases the equipment's natural durability and resistance to wear & tear.
- Weight: 17.5kg
When he tried it on, the weight increase was negligible. He twisted around and did a few cursory movements only to see that the mobility hadn't been hampered at all by the added reinforcements. But some part of Chester couldn't help but feel disappointed. Apart from an added resistance to the elements and an interesting line about 'increasing kinetic energy absorbed', he didn't see anything worthy of a master blacksmith. Unwilling to be disappointed, he posed Jerry with a question.
"What's that description about kinetic energy? It doesn't sound all that, to be honest."
The eccentric dwarf gave Alda a look, and she seemed to understand his unspoken request. In an instant, she drew back her fist and let loose a devastating punch to the sternum. Due to his guard being down and the sheer unexpectedness of the attack, Chester could only step back slightly to soften the mana-infused blow.
It made an impossibly loud clang as metal fist met with his mithril breastplate, and Chester skidded back by a few centimeters from the sheer power of the blow.
"What the hell was that for?!" He yelled out, angered beyond belief. "If you hit me without my armor my I'd be on the fucking ground right now!"
"That's the point," Alda replied back, as the master blacksmith crossed his arms in smug reassurance. "I put enough power into that to break your ribs and send you back a few feet, but you hardly even moved. Check your stats. You didn't take damage, did you?"
Chester opened up his status box only to see that he hadn't taken a single piece of damage. He stared at the breastplate and it didn't even show the faintest sign of a scratch despite taking a blow on par with the ones he took from the physically-inclined Scrap Bots in Stillwater. He was certain it would take a bullet from a sniper rifle to pierce through the magical equipment he wore.
"Whoever designed this is a genius, but their understanding of metallurgy and armor-making is on an amateur level, respectfully speaking," Sharpax said, going deeper into how he refined the armor. Tracing his calloused fingers down the sides where the reinforced frame was, he continued his explanation. "By stabilizing the frames and doing some slight readjustment, attacks below a certain level will disperse evenly through the armor without affecting you, enhancing your capabilities in battle by another magnitude."
That explanation allowed Chester to realize the depth of the pink-bearded dwarf's complete mastery of blacksmithing. With such few drawbacks and so much improvement, it was no wonder the kingdom was guarded so fiercely. He truly believed that this floor of blacksmiths was more valuable than anything the vault had to offer.
'What the hell? How haven't these midgets taken over the world yet with their sick ass loot?'
"Jerry, I'm honestly stunned by the quality of this. Here, I have some gold on me. Take it as a tip for the amazing job you've done." As Chester started rummaging through his bag, the shorter man raised his hand as a sign to stop.
"No need, I'm well off as it is. Simply glad you enjoyed it. If you really want to pay me back, treat me to a round at the tavern tonight!"
Chester rolled his eyes and smiled, he liked the dwarf's demeanor, much more humble and kind than Arber. He frowned upon the thought of the rude and massive dwarf. Their conversation continued on for a few more minutes, as they went over the commission for his grappling hook gloves. Giving the man his thanks, the two departed and Alda turned to him, giving the criminal illusionist a questioning glance.
"Do you want to grab food?"
"Yeah, after that I'll head off and meet with Damien. Know a good place where we can eat?"
"A few blocks by the palace there's Ol' Bonnie's. They make a mean beef roast."
"Sounds good. I'm starving." Chester said, slowly thinking about the next stage of his plan. With his armor and suit ready to go, the criminal mastermind was mentally preparing himself to delve into the sewers later in the afternoon.
'I hope I don't vomit out my lunch...' He thought to himself quietly, focusing back on his date with Alda for the time being, knowing that there was a lot of work to do afterward.
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