《ODHM: Holst Curio and Convenience》3: Lost Wrench / New Wrench
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The Server of Kalt-Zahn-Brennan was a frigid world with long winters, short falls, and nearly non-existent summers and springs. Global warming caused by an especially pernicious abuse of their environment, ironically led to a deep freeze for their world. The fact that they’d inadvertently killed and thus angered a local population of spirits and fae was what ended up pushing their world to a state where the HOA was forced to step in.
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It was dark out by this time of night, and late enough that not too long ago, the city gates would have long been sealed shut to keep raiders and beasts at bay. The air and sky became a curtain of blustery white as the snow began to really pick up. Forty-five-year-old Remminton “Remmy” Kruger glanced up at the sky with a peeved look. For him, this snow felt like the icing on a pie made of “horse-chocolate”.
He’d just come back from Oren, the largest city-state in the region. Their guild bullied his guild into lending them a few people because winter was well on its way, which meant more snow and more tooth-fairy attacks. Thankfully, the snow-beasts only became a problem when things warmed up again in the spring so going back and forth between the two cities wasn’t too much of a hardship.
Remmy was a short, solidly-built man with dark tan skin. He was a rough-and-tumble dandy, a charming fellow who wasn’t conventionally handsome but had an “interesting” face. He had a rounded jaw, a stubby nose, and narrow lips. His jaw was masked by a thick, well-trimmed, beard. His eyes were dark green, wide-set, and framed by a pair of thick eyebrows. His black hair was short and straight, and tapered.
He wore the thick, long, bright canary-yellow coat that served as the uniform of Mesmer City Guild Engineers. Beneath the coat the clothes he wore were simple, padded, form-fitting garments meant to keep out the cold. The clothing’s appearance was somewhere between a gentleman’s suit and a worker's jumpsuit. Finally, on his face, he wore a pair of sunglasses meant to protect his eyes from the scourge and ever-present danger of snow-blindness.
“Tch...It’s really coming down innit’?” grumbled Remmy to himself. Puffing on the cigarette he’d been smoking. Tapping the end and letting about a third of the cigarette crumble away in the wind.
Remmy looked around, hoping to spot an entry to the city’s underground. Today really had been just an absolute shite day. First there was that nonsense about being sent over to Oren, which Remmy had to make a several hours long commute he hadn’t planned on making that day.
Then Remmy had to deal with Oren’s jealous incompetents and that absolute dickhead, Tyrell Booker, having made a complete mess of their city’s pipework, but officiously trying to stonewall him from accessing their heating system to sort out the mess that they’d made. It didn’t help that the peons of Oren’s city’s Plumbing and Heating Guild’s guildmaster were buzzing around trying to low-key threaten/cajole him into joining their guild the whole time.
Overall the whole day had been a headache, the highlight being when Remmy lost his favorite wrench trying to stop a tooth-fairy from dragging one of Oren city’s boys into the tunnels. He’d saved the lad, but the beast snagged his wrench in its enormous teeth, and didn’t spit his wrench out, when it ran off.
Now, it was snowing like no tomorrow, and Remmy really wasn’t looking to catch his death of cold out here. Snow showers in Kalt-Zahn had their way of escalating quickly, like a bar brawl during a seasonal festival. What looked like it’d only amount to a few inches could quickly turn into several feet of snow, so Remmy needed to either find his way to the underground pronto, or find somewhere to wait things out above ground, until the snow stopped and the city brought some steam-plows through.
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After walking for a bit and looking around a bit, Remmy was surprised and relieved to spy a storefront in the city’s above ground. There weren’t many shops on the city’s surface nowadays, or if they were there, the main entrance would usually be in the city’s underground. Still, Remmy wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Thus he quickly went inside the shop before the rapidly falling snow buried him alive.
The inside of the shop was mercifully much warmer than it had been on the street outside. There was an air about the place, like a cross between his grand-da’s house, and a library. Cozy, and familiar, but also officious in a way. There were shelves and shelves stacked with all sorts of items and products. There clothing carousels were covered in garments that varied in familiarity and function. There was also an eatery, and what Remmy dearly hoped was a bar. Finally, Remmy couldn’t help but notice that this little shop was much larger on the inside than it had seemed when he was just looking around for somewhere to avoid freezing to death.
As Remmy took a second and third look at the place, someone popped out from behind one of the many shelves and aisles. A tall woman. A big woman. Large as a barn. Plainly pretty like a wildflower in a field. Her hair was sunflower yellow, her eyes were blue like the sky. Her skin was a light golden-tan. Her stance and gaze reminded Remmy of many soldiers he’d palled around with, and his own time in the army. Her build made him feel like her fighting days hadn’t been all that long ago, and maybe she still did a bit of fighting every now and again.
“Oh, hi! Welcome to our store! I’m Josephine, one of the store owners. Please feel free to look around, you can ask me or the other staff if you need any help. Oh, also my husband’s around. He’s also a store owner. So of course you can ask him too!” said the woman. Sounding as bright and sunny as a warm summer’s day. Her voice light and low and filled with enough good humor to thaw Remmy’s bad mood.
“Er...Alright, I guess I will. Heh, I don’t suppose you folks have any hardware in this little...er, shop of yours?” said Remmy. Scratching at his chin.
“Indeed we do,” said a voice. Low, soft, and just a tad musical. Giving Remmy half a heart-attack because it came from right behind him.
Remmy turned around and resisted the gut instinct to pull his steam-pistol out his shoulder-holster. He looked up and saw himself gazing at the face of what might have been the most handsome man he’d ever seen in his life. Remmy couldn’t help clucking his tongue as she gaze into a well-formed face, of warm brown skin, a heart-shaped face, well-defined cheekbones and a jawline sharp enough cut yourself on.
The man’s look was scholarly, and slightly delicate, but just rugged enough to make you feel that the man was the capable sort. The kind of man that’d make you feel safe when he held you. His lips were full and inviting. His nose was long, straight, and charmingly beak-like. His ears were...pointed?, or perhaps just looked that way. His fluffy, lucious, mid-length locks were an eccentric pink.
His large, intense, eyes were yellow, all the shades of yellow. Filled with a depth that made it hard to meet the man’s gaze, and made Remmy sure that the man was older than he looked. The man was tall, and slender, and just fit enough to make it feel like he did something outside the world of ink and paper. Overall, his looks were ethereal and bore a grace that made Remmy feel like he was looking at a work of living art.
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“I...Uh...Alrighty, then…” said Remmy. Finding himself on the backfoot and not liking it much at all.
“Hardware and weapons are located in roughly the same area, around that-a-ways,” said the stupidly handsome shopkeep.
“Because they’re ‘both’ kinds of hardware, you see~?!” said the bubbly giantess. Eyes shining. Smiling broadly as if she’d just told the most brilliant joke that had ever been told by anyone, ever...
“Uh, yeah...Thanks,” said Remmy. Just a little weirded out by the giantess’ manic energy. Nodding as he hurriedly made his way over to the area that the man had pointed to, while stealing a look at his shoulder and wondering whether he was pissed off at being made so out of sorts, or pleased to have seen something nice to brighten his day after a hard day of working in Oren’s maintenance tunnels.
Those thoughts were forgotten when Remmy finally got to the hardware section and saw what was there. The next hour, hour and a half, or more, were spent with Remmy drooling over tools that were either excellent specimens of things that he’d seen and used before, or tools that he’d never seen or dreamt could exist in the current age, outside of old world ruin. Remmy pressed his face up to the glass case that surrounded some of the more expensive item’s shelves, like a kid in a candy store.
Then Remmy saw “it”. The tool he’d been looking for all his life. The wrench he’d been looking for all his life. A Type-22 Black-Imperium Multi-tool used by the army engineers of the Old Empire of Nychta. His great-great-grandfather used to have one from “his” time in the army, but when the great freeze hit where the family was living they’d been forced to pawn it off for tickets to “warmer” shores. The men in Remmy’s family line had been lamenting the loss ever since.
The Imperium multi-tool looked a lot like a penlight. Or a very slim and rectangular tape-measure with a very pronounced grip. However, in truth, by simply pressing a button it would emit a length of extendable, self-molding, smart metal that would wrap around nearly any piece and shape, and with a press of another button, molecularly bond itself with the thing one was trying to shift. Then with the act of trying to retract itself, the tool would attempt to turn the object or component, on its own.
The multi-tool also had a multitude of other functions that Remmy’s grandfather and father had never stopped lamenting the loss of. Serving as a knife, screw-driver, pry bar, hammer, chainsaw, and myriad other potential tools, thanks to the smart metal’s ability to mimic most simple machines. Remmy’s father and grandfather had always made it sound like civilization would have long ago been saved from the terrors of the forever winter if only everyone remembered to pack theirs when they were fleeing the snow and the snow-beasts.
“Oi, hey...Shopkeep!...I’d like to make a purchase, please!?” said Remmy. Immediately moving on a thing that he was sure was a once in a lifetime opportunity.
“Yes, dear customer. One of the staff will be with you shortly,” said the shopkeeper.
Less than a second later, a staff member appeared at Remmy’s side, half scaring him to death again. The individual...the creature...was humanoid but clearly not human. Their gray face was featureless like a store mannequin or an artist’s figure drawing doll. Their figure was diminutive but not quite childlike. Beneath the black button-down shirt they wore as a uniform, they were dressed in a slightly oversized, form-fitting, jumpsuit with their head covered by the jumpsuit’s hood, a single pair of glowing lights emanating from deep within the unnaturally dark cowl. They reminded Remmy of the mooks one sometimes saw in old transforming hero shows and comics.
“Uh...I’d like to get that, please?”said Remmy, doing his best not to offend the strange creature. The old engineer’s instincts warned him not to take the creature’s size as a sign of weakness.
The staff member nodded, stepped forwards and used a look to open the glass case, bringing out the Black Imperium Multi-tool. Remmy's eyes glowed with pleasure as he received the tool. Any discomfort was forgotten as he had the tool’s heft in his hand. Then Remmy saw the price and frowned as he saw something next to it.
“Er...What’s this about time? This isn’t some rental place right?” said Remmy.
“Hm? Oh, time is one of the currencies we accept. In truth, it is the currency we accept most universally...Credits are a close second but hold less priority for our store. Finally, there are local currencies like your own. The tag should have been updated to reflect our shop's prices within this world,” said the shop-keeper.
Remmy frowned, much of the explanation flying over his head. Ultimately, he was able to decipher that this was not a rental establishment...and so he ‘would’ be buying his multi-tool in full. He looked at the tag and found that there was indeed a price in pounds reflected there. He whistled, it was a bit pricey but considering that this was an old-world relic in seemingly mint condition, the stated price might have been an under-valuation all things considered.
Remmy walked up to the counter, while pulling out his wallet. Intending to pay before the shopkeeper could change his mind.
“Thanks, you for your business!” said the bubbly blond amazon, who stood next to the handsome shop-keep.
“No, thank ‘you’! If I didn’t come from a long line of utterly shite dancers, I’d be doing a jig right now,” laughed Remmy. His mood had reached a high that was only dwarfed by the first time he’d held his little girl. Remmy looked at the bar and noted the many bottles of clear, golden, crimson, and amber liquid sitting on the shelves.
“Er...Before I leave, any chance I can get a quick drink?” said Remmy. As he pushed the pounds across the counter and received the receipt for the multi-tool.
“Of course, it’ll be my honor to serve you, dear customer,” said the yellow-eyed shopkeeper.
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Remmy ended up having a little more than a single quick drink. Yet mysteriously, no matter how much he drank, he never got so drunk that he lost hold of his senses, or his coordination. Remmy reckoned that part of this was his blood. His folk were related to the secret-folk, the other folk who’d been forced to come out into the open by the tooth-fairies and the forever winter. Remmy was thus something like one-eighth dwarf. Yet, Remmy was also clearly aware that the other seven-eighths of him were human and by now he’d at least be seeing double.
However, anytime Remmy considered questioning this he’d note the multi-tool on the counter beside him and he’d decide that maybe this was just how things were in this shop. Maybe they were watering down the liquor. Maybe Remmy was just having a really good day. Who knew? Who cares? Eventually, those thoughts were forgotten thanks to the pleasant company. The blond was an amiable chatterbox, and the handsome one had a real genteel manner to him, that made it easy for Remmy to cut loose.
“You know...This place is all right,” said Remmy.
“Thank you,” said the yellow-eyed man. Sipping his own drink as he sat beside Remmy at the bar.
“I’m Remmington by the way. Remmington Kruger,” said Remmy.
“Charmed...I’m Ellis Holst,” said the handsome shopkeeper.
“And I’m Josephine Holst...Nice to meetcha!” said the blond.
“Heh, thanks for killing the breeze with an old man, and letting me chat yer off,” said Remmy.
“No problem...I opened this business for the conversation and the people watching. So it was my profit in the end. Thank you for your patronage,” said the yellow-eyed man.
“Heh...Fair enough. Welp, I can see that the snow’s stopping and the hour is late. I best get home,” said Remmy.
“Safe travels,” said Josephine.
By the time he left the bar, and the shop, Remmy felt relaxed and pleased with all that he’d achieved today. He had this feeling that something big was going to happen soon. He had this feeling that he was on the precipice of something. It was only a few seconds later that Remmy realized that rather than exiting onto the street on the surface, he’d somehow found himself standing in a street in Mesmer’s underground.
“Huh…? That happened, I guess,” said Remmy. Deciding not to overthink it. Believing that life was better without overcomplications and over-worrying.
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