Floor 10 is supposedly a boss floor. Instead of the usual cave layout, it is a properly constructed stone room, like an entrance hall in a castle. And a bit in the distance I can see the boss monster waiting for me.

Name Grey Rock Plague Age N/A Classes Earth Golem 10, Knight 10, Fighter 10, Hunter 10

Miner 10, Smith 10 Race Generic Monster 10 Extra Monster 10, Boss 10 HP 81924/81924 MP 1260/1260 SP 6580/6580 STR 1190+120 DEX 740 VIT 1080+50 MAG 370 FTH 350 WIL 1090+50 CHA 300 Equipment Monster Sword, Monster Shield Skills Sword Training 20, Spear Training 10, Shield Training 10, Armor Training 10

Tracking 10

Earth Resistance 10, Physical Resistance 10

Unsafe Zone 10 Weakness Water

A gigantic golem wielding a massive sword that even Guts would call too big. Just what the doctor ordered for a bad day.

(Pardon the language but 'what the fuck is this shit'? 81924 HP AND insane defense stats on top? This was supposed to be a tutorial boss and not an endgame raid boss! If this is what passes for normal I'm surprised anyone has ever beaten a boss here period.)

(That may seem a lot to you but imagine if you had a group of Thereses. They'd probably deal at least 500 damage each hit to it. 160 hits spread over 5-7 people go by relatively quickly. Especially when you don't have to cast a spell for over three seconds each time.)

(Yeah, no, screw this, I'm out.)

...am I really?

(Why aren't you moving then?)

(As dumb as it sounds I have to know...

none of its skills suggest that it can move faster than the regular variants and even the elites were just like their normal cousins just with slightly higher stats but not faster.)

(I'd like to stick on the side of caution and say 'go home' but if you're serious about dungeon diving I'm afraid we'll eventually have to find out how the properties of the base race translate to the boss variant.)

(I'm kinda confident it'll be fine. The elites weren't different from the regular variant either, just the inflated stats and extra skills the additional classes suggested.)

I shoot a regular ice shot at the boss to draw its attention.

You've inflicted 226 damage and a status effect to Grey Rock Plague.

(Good, status effects still work! But that damage is pathetic...)

(Do you think it'll die before retirement?)

(At least before my old world achieves world peace.)

Name Grey Rock Plague Status Cold (0.1 HP/s) Age N/A Classes Earth Golem 10, Knight 10, Fighter 10, Hunter 10

Miner 10, Smith 10 Race Generic Monster 10 Extra Monster 10, Boss 10 HP 81698/81924 MP 1260/1260 SP 6580/6580 STR 1190+120 DEX 740 VIT 1080+50 MAG 370 FTH 350 WIL 1090+50 CHA 300 Equipment Monster Sword, Monster Shield Skills Sword Training 20, Spear Training 10, Shield Training 10, Armor Training 10

Tracking 10

Earth Resistance 10, Physical Resistance 10

Unsafe Zone 10 Weakness Water

And sure enough, the boss starts walking in my direction with the same speed as its lesser variants. I continue running ahead towards the floor 9 safety zone while stopping every once in a while and shooting another ice shot at it until my MP is depleted.

We pass through the safety zones between floors 8 and 9 continuing until we reach the zone between 5 and 6. Even there it still doesn't stop following me.

(I'm beginning to think this was a bad idea. Chloe said that bosses only go up to three floors away from their spawn, this is already four!)

(Keep running. Floor 2 was big so if it gets that far you can kite it there.)

(Sounds like a plan.)

We arrive at the safety zone between floors 3 and 4 - and now the boss seemingly can't go any further, (so its 6 floors and not 3... do I want to know if the increased range is from a glitch, is boss specific or does the boss just not feel like fighting anymore?)

(That's something we'll have to find out eventually unless you can gain some sort of tank summon or three to stall bosses for you.)

(How about both?)

(Both sounds fine.)

Name Grey Rock Plague Status Cold (1.1 HP/s) Age N/A Classes Earth Golem 10, Knight 10, Fighter 10, Hunter 10

Miner 10, Smith 10 Race Generic Monster 10 Extra Monster 10, Boss 10 HP 78952/81924 MP 1260/1260 SP 6580/6580 STR 1190+120 DEX 740 VIT 1080+50 MAG 370 FTH 350 WIL 1090+50 CHA 300 Equipment Monster Sword, Monster Shield Skills Sword Training 20, Spear Training 10, Shield Training 10, Armor Training 10

Tracking 10

Earth Resistance 10, Physical Resistance 10

Unsafe Zone 10 Weakness Water

(It will still take some time to freeze to death. And I don't feel comfortable sitting within range distracted by reading in case it decides to suddenly ignore the safety zone wall again.)

(Yeah, same here. Also, replace 'some time' with close to twenty hours!!)

Bang Bang

It seems like the mobile mountain loses its patience, it slams its sword repeatedly into the invisible wall between us. Then it throws the sword away and starts pounding the wall with its fists clearly frustrated with the whole situation.

(I hope this wall doesn't have limited HP... Hey, Elly. While we wait, how about you give me everything you've got on all of its skills.)

(All of them?)

(Yes.)

(You asked for it.)

Training

Passive

Can use without attack penalty.

Increase effective STR by (skill level) for equipped .

About what I'd expect.

Shield Training

Passive

Can equip non-makeshift shields.

I guess my book would count as a makeshift shield then.

Armor Training

Passive

Can equip medium and heavy armor.

Increase effective VIT by (skill level) while equipped with medium or heavy armor.

(Oh, so I couldn't have used much better armor even if I had bought it? Dodged a bullet there.)

(Maybe the armor merchant would've allowed you to return it if you can't use it.)

(That's just guesswork.)

Tracking

Passive

Increase tracking skills.

(That's... a non-description if I ever saw one.)

(Useless and 100% accurate, my favorite.)

Resistance

Passive

Gain (skill level) points of resistance to damage and related status effect chances.

(I wouldn't call 'physical' an element but then earth isn't an element either. Not that anyone around here would know anything about proper chemistry. Neither do I. Considering how little the difference between an earth spell and another element was on the regular rock golem I don't think a few points of resistance are too much to worry about.)

(I agree. The whole system seems to boil down to a big game of rocket tag.)

(Should've been obvious once we found out that damage over time status effects do not wear off naturally. Tag something that doesn't have super high natural regeneration once with a bleed, cold, poison or probably fire effect and you can go on vacation.)

(Speaking of that maybe you should aim for one of those elements so you can branch out a bit. Just ice spells all the time gets boring.)

(Hey, I'm just using what works. This is real life, I don't get a second chance. So if I can overcome an 80 levels disadvantage by spamming the boring 'overpowered' element I'll gladly do just that. Playing 'fair' is for suckers and soon-to-be-dead people.)

Unsafe Zone

Passive

The owner can bypass a number of safe zones ë̸̼q̷̠̉ṵ̵̚a̷͕͝l̶̳̓ ̶̮́ṱ̴͒ö̷̹́ ̴̙̋t̷̮̓h̸̽ͅȩ̸̓ ̴̯̄n̶̺͝u̶͕͌m̴͙̃b̷̮͌e̵͖̎r̸̺̐ ̴̨̉o̵͔͘f̴͈̈́ ̸̝̇c̶͓̾l̴̘̈ä̶̢́s̶͓̐ṡ̴͉e̵̩̽s̴̢̍ ̸͈͊o̶̭͝w̶̜̓n̸̻̉e̸̙̽ď̴͇ from its spawn point.

(Hello, glitches, my old friend. You've come to talk with me again...)

(Now if we could just read the garbled text we could make a better guess of how safe we are right now.)

(Yeah, but we can't. For all I can read it may change the limit every 5 minutes or so.)

(True, ok, last skill.)

(Huh? But that should've been all already.)

Mindless Monster

Passive

Overwrites owner's will.

Automatically hostile to any creature that does not possess this skill.

Can't enter dungeon safe zones.

Unable to gain exp.

(Great, now there're also hidden skills. Are there more of those? How'd you even find it if it doesn't come up with [appraisal]?)

(Huh? But... but I found it with that skill. It still shows up there.)

(...maybe there's a filter option. Let me check my menu.)

I check through the UI tab, nothing. Maybe under skills? Yep, there's a sub-option for appraisal. And there's a filter list: 'mindless monster' is the only entry there. What happens when I remove it... great, now I see the skill in Mr. Rock's appraisal window as well. I think I'll filter it out again, should be obvious who has it.

(That's... one mystery cleared up at least. I should really spend more time checking for such traps in the menu. Who even sets that as the default!?)

I just observe the boss for the remaining time until its life runs out, sneaking in another ice shot whenever my MP allows me to. Some time later its assault on the invisible wall stops. It collapses to the ground like an old man giving in to desperation.

...did it just look up and give me puppy eyes? Sorry, 'pal', your fate is already sealed. It was over the moment you got your [mindless monster] skill.

After what feels like an eternity the gigantamax rock finally dies.

Achievement Get!

Win a staring contest with a rock!

Uh, I mean:

Grey Rock Plague was defeated.

Acquired a truth gem (72% charge remaining).

(Huh, that could be useful.)

(Who do you plan to interrogate?)

(...myself.)

(I don't follow.)

(There are some things that don't add up with my memory. Like I'm fairly certain I couldn't ever see blood, would feel nauseous at the merest sight of it. But now? I can see and drink it without the slightest issue.)

(Probably just because you're now a vampire. It would be... difficult if you got sick every time you eat.)

(Good, and if they've messed with 'me' in that way who is to say they haven't manipulated even more?)

(Huh, yeah, didn't think about that. I agree that is worth checking out. And how do you plan to do that?)

Elly, did you really just ask me to reveal the details of my plan so that it is guaranteed to fail?

(Observe.)

I take the item out of my inventory, "my memory has been tampered with."

The gem shines grey, (ok, now I'm man enough to admit that that would've been too easy... but come on, cut me some slack every once in a while!)

(Maybe just state some of the things you remember from your previous life and see if they come up as correct?)

(That's the next best thing, yeah.)

"I fainted when I saw blood in third grade" - the gem turns red, (huh?)

"I worked over ten years for the same company" - it stays red, (what?)

"Jeff lied to me" - grey, (ok, how should it know that. That one is on me.)

"umm... I dated Daisy Smith in high school" - red.

"I didn't date Daisy Smith in high school" - also red.

(Ok, what the fuck is going on!? Those last two statements are mutually exclusive. They can't be both false at the same time!!)

(Yeah, I got nothing either. Maybe this crystal is just defective?)

"I'm a vampire now" - green.

"I was not a vampire before" - green.

(So much for that angle.)

(Just put it away for now. You can try again later when we have a better plan.)

(Yeah, true.)

I drink another blood pack and then move on to floor 11. There I see... hundreds of regular-sized bees - just what I was missing today.

Name Age N/A Classes Zombee 11 Race Generic Monster 11 Extra Monster 11 HP 1643/1643 MP 527/527 SP 3255/3255 STR 217 DEX 434 VIT 93 MAG 186 FTH 155 WIL 62 CHA 93 Skills Flight 11, Undead 11, Zombie Bite 11 Weakness Fire, Light, Holy

(And this is where the pun monsters start? Well, same tactic as before.)

As soon as I step out of the safe zone all of the bees start charging at me.

Your 'Ice Blast' has inflicted a total of 29304 damage and 32 status effects.

Each 'Ice Blast' lands about 30 to 40 status effects and on a few casts I get stung a couple of times when sticking my hand out to blow the little buggers up. Nothing I can't regenerate over a couple of hours while I wait for MP anyway.

You've taken 120 damage from Zombee's attack.

I could survive up to 7 stings at once but they never land more than 4 whenever I stick my hand out to cast another 'Ice Blast'. The required regeneration makes this floor take a few days longer than necessary but rather that than dead.

And next is floor 12. Eight old friends wait for me. Welcome to slime Thursday, gentlemen.

Name Age N/A Classes Slime 12, Berserker 12, Battle Mage 12 Race Generic Monster 12 Extra Monster 12, Elite 12 HP 5280/5280 MP 1116/1116 SP 5832/5832 STR 788 DEX 488 VIT 296 MAG 596 FTH 424 WIL 200 CHA 220 Skills Axe Training 12

Fire Magic 12 (Rank 1), Weapon Magic 12

Acid Skin 12, Rapid Regeneration 12, Reckless Attack 12 Weakness Fire

(I guess this is where the fun stops. They have fire magic, just the right thing for my undead weaknesses and with the last update their [Rapid Regeneration] also clears status effects. So I can't make a dent into their HP and I'm in constant danger of getting one-shot from range.)

(Try it anyway?)

(No. Too risky. I had a good enough idea with e.g. the Ragelopes how their ram attack works, I could see it be used against our gate guards. But with monster magic? No clue. For all I know, they don't need to chant for spells and can just instantly shoot it. And seeing how even my spells fly as fast as gun bullets - forget it. Aside from that, I doubt I can get past their HP and status regeneration anyway. This is the end of this dungeon trip.)

(Finally, err, I mean... good thinking, we've made plenty of progress after all.)

(I wouldn't really call it progress. I got a lot of exp, yes, but I don't have anything to show for it. The new skill does nothing for me, my stats have barely gone up and what I've read in those books can be summed up as 'eternal war of mankind with demons and monsters.' Really, nothing in them even hints that the people here have any idea what 'peace' would even be.)

(Which reminds me why did you focus so much on history books? Wouldn't something from Gzeph's documents be more useful?)

(...his stuff gives me a headache. It is either unreadable because of file corruption or unreadable because he assumes the reader already has critical knowledge - which I lack.)

(Say, I wanted to surprise you when I'm done but I'm working on restoring some of those documents. Ok, restoring is a bit much. But in the end, it is just text so I can at least make parts of them readable again.)

(That's some good news. How much progress have you made so far?)

(I'm about two thirds done with the file on titles.)

(*sigh* again with the titles...)

(Of course! You said you wanted to know more about the 'Demon Lord candidate' title so I thought this would be the best place to start.)

(Yeah, that makes sense. Sorry, I take it back. That should be very helpful.)

(Also speaking of titles -)

I interrupt Elly, (I had to put my foot where my mouth is...)

(over your little dungeon exploration you've unlocked a few more titles, wanna hear them?)

(First, tell me if I still have the candidate available. I'm just dying to know that I've gained another nigh impossible to beat opponent.)

(No, that's still there.)

(Neither option would've been satisfying so I take it. What are the new titles?)

Bookworm

Improves reading speed.

(That's all? No thanks. One of the main reasons I read is just to pass time and if I took that I'd run even faster out of ways to stave off boredom. The selection in the library is already very limited. Next?)

Destroyer

Whenever you inflict at least 10,000 damage with a single hit to a target you can inflict fear at a rate of 20 to all witnesses.

(Why do I even have that? My attack power is pathetic.)

(I read in the note about titles that you gain this time for dealing 100,000 damage with a single attack and you... rained on someone's parade for more than that.)

(Anyway, pass. I'm lightyears away from dealing that much damage with a single hit. And if I cared about inflicting fear I could just switch [intimidation] on.)

(True enough.)

Daywalker

Undead only.

Gain (skill level) points of resistance to sunlight damage.

Reduce damage taken from natural sunlight through the effect of 'Undead' by (skill level).

(In principle I'd want that. Currently, I take 25 damage per second in the sun, reduce that by 1 is... well, not much better, really. I'd last maybe 1-2 seconds extra. And the experience with the golems tells me 1 point of resistance isn't really worth much either.)

(Maybe but when you increase your title level it would start to make a much bigger difference. But then you should already have enough time to sunbath between the cloak and the ring.)

(You know what, I'll take that later. Going over 5 titles supposedly increases the cost for title levels and looking at this it needs several levels to become useful. And before you tell me another good title in a moment I'll postpone it.)

(Ok, will keep it on hand for later.)

Brave One

Gain (skill level) points of resistance to fear effects.

(I assume that fear is a subset of mind effects and I'm supposedly already immune to them.)

(Yeah, that wouldn't do anything for you. Last one.)

Weary Soul

Recover (skill level) MP and SP when hearing a bad joke.

Each unique joke counts only once per day.

(Hey, Elly, quick, come up with 200 dad jokes!)

(Uh, no?)

(See? Another pointless title.)

(...sorry, another wasted session.)

(Maybe. I'll need to read up on demon lords in this world. That means studying some legends from books in the library until you've restored the document about titles and then we'll check that one. I may take that title and maybe 'Daywalker' if I've some exp to waste on rising titles a little bit. Depends on what exactly it does.)

(Gotcha.)

I go back to the dungeon entrance and wait until MP is full again and only then leave. On the other side of the gate, everyone is also still leaving the dungeon, to them my ten days long expedition doesn't seem to have happened.