“Well well, another Bel. First of the night. Good thing we have these umbrellas.”

“But what can the SRs do?”

“I wonder that every day. Ha ha ha!”

“Ohohoho!”

“Really now.”

A clap of thunder, and another, and a third straightaway. Rumbling clouds raced to Freegate and unloaded rain as soon as they reached their positions. Night would never come so long as players kept recruiting, but darkness might and did.

“Now that's weather!” Tramda yelled and did a little Tramda dance.

“I suppose it is. By definition.” Saptres Muria examined his trebuchet. He gave the other conspirators a thumbs-up.

“A storm like this would never stop an engine put together by Saptres Muria,” Ipons Ulsrada said. “The only problem now is, see, that's a genius, but which one? Reti Celcens?”

“I accounted for that in my brain just now. Ipons!” Ulrik laid a hand on his comrade's shoulder. “Help me. We can work together to accomplish our goals.”

“Oh! You've got another Reaper plan?”

“And how. Stand right here. Good. Stay.” Ulrik backed up a little. “Wait, wait, wait, there's one! Inferno Strike!”

“Aaaaaaahhhhhhh!”

A blazing torch that some might have mistaken for a Flood Strategist illuminated a slim girl with lustrous black hair down to her shoulders wearing a blue dress. Although she stood straight instead of trying to hide behind her caduceus, the Rares knew to grab that one and get themselves another Vinnette Melban.

“A masterful strategy,” Hyune Giling said. “Or rather, tactics, but regardless.”

“You know, this is making me realize I never really look at you guys. I mean I look at you every day, but I don't really know what you look like,” said Dennet.

“You mean how Clyse has a ponytail, or Burmin's blond hair peeking from under that helmet. Agreed, agreed.”

“Yes, and someone could go the longest time and think you were nothing but a big, bushy beard. Which is so unfair! You have big, bushy eyebrows too, and a tabard with red and green sections. So what did everyone notice about me?”

The other Rares consulted and nominated Reginald to deliver a summary of their findings. “Just another blonde archer in a green dress. Argh!”

Discoveries emerged one after another during the recruiting session. Saptres and Hyune hauled a Leaznalo over to the trebuchet and agreed after extensive measuring that the active one was bigger and had shinier skin than the dupe. They agreed to look into the mystery, and to include him in the Fortification as compensation for his participation in the study. The gray streak in Reginald's brown hair was also highlighted by Ulrik's flames, which prompted speculation that he had a cooler backstory than anyone might have thought.

“I'm an assistant cargo inspector in Fanbaran, the capital and chief port of Lanmaran,” he explained, which was a long-winded way of saying no.

“Was I the only one who didn't know Ebulan has a hard hat with his lens in it?”

“Burmin, how'd you go this long without knowing that? It's so handy,” said Dennet, leaning his elbow on Ebulan's head.

“Oh! And he's short, too!”

The rain fell straight at first, but winds angled it more and more as the desired UR failed to show despite the unbelievable SR luck of the session. No matter how fierce the weather, nothing dampened the flames of the Inferno Rares for obvious technical and design reasons, and nothing stopped the schemers from snapping up Dennets and Saptreses Muria until another rainbow column appeared which doubtless heralded the end of the session.

“Belled again. Is he fully Fortified with this one?”

“Yep.”

“Did I count right? I think this is actually above average. For Ultra Rare rates, that is.”

“Go tell the recruiters that. I'm sure the joyful news will receive a warm reception.”

The gap between the rocks and clouds became a dance hall for lightning. Ipons Ulsrada watched, and his Strategist mind incorporated the new situation into his calculations and projections without conscious effort. “Great! We can use the lightning to see!”

“Maybe. We need to be sure. Inferno Strayayayayabrzzzzt! Environmental lightning does 200 damage. Remember this crucial fact I sacrificed 200 HP to learn.”

“Already forgot it,” Quille proclaimed on behalf of everyone there.

“Then give me back my 200 HP! Not you, Princess Melban. It's more important to punish the guilty than to be healthy. Thank you anyway.”

A third Quille Treten dupe appeared, which excited Quille Prime enough to drive him to say “Hm, hm!” several times. The other officers, both inside and outside the walls, saved their enthusiasm for something greater they could sense was coming. Greater in terms of rarity, not in beard. Their premonition was no false thing. Without any of that ostentatious rainbow pillar nonsense Bel Felicitous Fasde needed to make him stand out, an Ultra Rare appeared. Not a Warper and not a man. She wore a man's tunic and pants though, and her long dark hair and a sword and dagger completed the simple yet striking look.

“That's a strange-looking Lynissia, gotta say.”

“I can't believe this game. They're just recycling designs now. See, Theena? She looks just like you.”

“Funny. Hilarious even.”

The darkness died then, overwhelmed by the flashes of thousands of lightning bolts. Rain was joined by its obnoxious cousin, hail, and the sky hurled pellets that did 10 damage each. The ground launched a counterattack, shaking and shooting up geysers of flame as predicted by the Inferno theory that the planet possessed a fiery core. The Floods, for their part, maintained an ocean with fishes of various sizes undergirded all the lands and filled the globe, while Storms suspected the world's center held the rehearsal room of the gods. Quakes believed in fair deals and great bargains.

“The day is getting on. I must be going,” Quille Treten shouted over the cacophony that accompanied the end of the world.

“Oh, how awful! Ulrik, Dennet, would you give me a hand? We forgot that Champions need their rest.” Sindze U. Radalo and her chosen accomplices carried Quille over to the trebuchet and replaced the Leaznalo component with a fresher and burlier officer. “There we go. Now if you need your diaper changed or whatever, how about you cry like a baby? But you're already doing that, aren't you?”

Hyune walked Leaznalo over to the pile and explained he could join it or them, after which discussion the collaborators gained a new member. Little was required of him, since by that point many of the recruited Rares could be allowed to pass unwrestled. Quille, Vinnette, Ipons, Saptres, and Ipons were done, and the rest were one away except for Stan.

More genii had come through, and more Super Rares who were actual new Super Rares, and all the Rares they wanted except a single Stan, when something happened that by then all thought impossible. She appeared. A panda costume with a girl's face sticking out below the fluff-filled head materialized next to them and ran forward with her arms spread out and a determined look.

“Five out of five! I don't know what her Nova is, but that's the cutest thing I've ever seen.”

“Ohhhhhh!” Tramda Olex said. “Ohhhh!”

“An officer like that is worth a storm or two,” Stan opined.

“But was she worth the Imperia Records? No, that's not for us to say. Time to close up shop! Good job, everyone!”

Above the western wall, the raging winds waned and allowed the usual kind to stir up conveniently and whip off the recruitment cloak. Time froze and showed the player multiple angles of the latest officer suspended in air, Night Shift Lynissia herself, who when time resumed hurtled forward and down to the courtyard, her arms angled up in celebration and her face still looking serious. The dismal clouds dissolved, the crashing came to a stop, and both hail and rain ran out. The band returned for a post-show performance while the watching officers cheered and grabbed the confetti pails placed under their seats. As an additional festive surprise, a ball flew over the walls after the recruits and smashed into the ground, whereupon it opened and out popped Ecund Scablus, the last genius recruited.

“And with that genuine use, my engine disappears,” Saptres Muria said. “Although I'm not confident about calling what just happened 'genuine.'”

“I think we all learned a lesson here today: siege equipment isn't just for sieges. It's for having a good time.”

“Ulrik, my boy, it didn't give me such a good time,” Quille said as he stretched and checked to ensure his beard made it out safely.

Tramda kicked him in the shin. “Serves you right!”

“A most fitting punishment.” Hyune Giling looked up from his book. “With that ugly episode behind us, I suppose we may allow you to drive the wagon once again.”

Nothing could be less suspicious than the sight of Rares loading furniture onto a wagon for removal, even if nobody remembered chasing them down and ordering them to do it. More suspicious might have been the time they took doing it and the side trip the wagon made outside the walls, but only if any of the Ultra Rares and Super Rares had stayed to watch instead of continuing the party indoors.

A building separate from Freegate's main keep contained the Barracks. That fact lessened the chance of discovery, not that discovery meant much at that point. If the cops find someone with a lot of money at a clandestine arms deal they arrest him, but at a bank or convenience store, that guy is just another customer. Nothing stopped the Rares from hauling three more of themselves, one at a time for Medics and Strategists but all at once for brawnier classes, and initiating the procedure.

Fortification complete! Class bonus improved! Fortification complete! Damage aura improved! Fortification complete! Damage aura improved! And that was that. The Rares increased their class bonuses to 15%, their damage bonus to their allies from 4% to 12%, and gained three little lines in the corner of their menu icons that formed a triangle. “I don't remember doing that,” a player might say, but was likely to decide, “Oh, I guess I remember doing that.”

“Sorry about your last dupe, Stan,” Clyse commiserated.

“Don't fret about that, lass. I've no need for any of that A little adventure with no call for healing now and then is what I like.” Stan's compatriots heroically decided not to fret about it in accordance with his wishes and finished the operation by restocking the alt closet. Afterwards, Leaznalo retired to the Rare lounge to write some scathing diary entries while the rest infiltrated the ongoing celebration in the main hall to greet Night Shift Lynissia or look at Minsie a little more.