《Gerald the Dungeon Companion》Petty revenge
Advertisement
“Kid ya need ta get serious,” spoke an exasperated Gerald.
But Silky is always serious mister Gerald, did you know that all these mushrooms you see are just a small part of a whole?
“Wait what are ya talking about? Just blabbing out random fact doesn’t make you serious kid, and what yer on about the mushrooms?” Gerald tried to admonish the young dungeon but was now derailed by the random comment.
All these big mushrooms you can see above ground? It’s all just the fruiting bodies whilst the main thingy is below ground and are just a big jumble of ropey things.
“Wait like a flower? How the fuck da ya know all these things kid?” asked Gerald in amazement as he placed his hands upon his hips whilst leering at the Toadshrool standing beside him. It was hard to imagine that the fugly monster beside him was a fungal equivalent to a walking flower and it wasn’t very often that he got to learn new things in his long life.
Silky grew them myself and when Silky put some of Silky inside of hundreds of them, Silky just knows.
Gerald was starting to feel his newfound amazement quickly fade to be replace by annoyance once more. The young dungeon was starting to revert to referring to herself by her own name again.
In his experience there were four types of people that did that; the stupidly arrogant, the powerful, the extremely evil with a major personality problems and/or high elves.
He wasn’t very keen about his charge going around speaking like a megalomaniac any time soon. It would also reflect badly for him.
“Kiddo remember what we said about the word I?”
Silky – I am sorry Gerald.
“Aight just try ta keep that in mind kid. Ya dinnae want to go about speaking like a loon,” Gerald then took a small pause as he watched the big Shrool turn around and lumber off between the mushroom-trees. “Now more importantly, ya got ta stop grow’in too fast without any defenses in place kid. We don’t know what else is in the cave out there that might come a’lookin if you keep pumping out mana all willy-nilly.”
Advertisement
But Silky… I’ve got you, Lorry and Jeff to help me.
“You need more monsters kid, ta three of us ain’t going to cut it,” he stated in a matter-of-fact fashion before swiping his hand and materialising his scrapheap-distiller.
What’s this? A new present?! asked Silky excitedly.
“Nah this ones for me kiddo, you’re too young to drink,” he joked with a snort before walking up to slap upon the side of one of his beakers within his contraption. A piece of chewed sap came off from the force of his gentle slap and Gerald quickly bent down to retrieve it. He then popped it in his mouth to wet it before sticking it back onto his device.
Awwww.
“Now I’m going ta head off to grab more beasties for ya, but I’m going to need you to grow some dry kindling for my boy over here,” he asked whilst squatting down to look at his now empty yet still sooty burning hatch that he had built into the bottom of his device.
What’s that?
“Hmmmm.. just grow a small mushroom and make it really dry will ya kid?”
Not a problem! I’l get on it mister Gerald.
“Oh and kid? How long ya reckon it would be before ya can claim ta area just outside this cave?” Gerald asked whilst sparing a thought for a certain asshole.
A while mister, Silky is trying to push out but its too big. So Silky…. I mean I.. am trying to dig my own cave to make it bigger instead because it’s easier than pushing my mana out into the big room.
“Oh well, guess I’ve got a wee stop to make.”
….
Gerald grabbed a hold of one of the Flenemon’s waving arms with a grin on his face.
Advertisement
The creature then immediately tried to pull back its frilly arm but found that its new prey wasn’t budging at all. It then pulled back all three of its other arms whilst somewhere amongst the basic nerve bundles that served as a brain it started to feel a sense of danger.
“You’re coming with me mate.”
Gerald then yanked the surprised Flenemon like a person yanking on their pet’s leash and the creature came off the wall along with a horrid sound. It somehow reminded Gerald of a wet fart squeezing through his ass cheeks.
He note with glee how the Flenemon that hung in the air pathetically was closing and opening its mouth in distress whilst waving its tentacles about all over the place.
“I’ve got you a new home mate,” he said before starting to ascend rapidly and trailing behind the arms of the Flenemon.
But before he got to the entrance of Silky’s dungeon a fun idea quickly occurred to Gerald.
He put some more power into his wingbeats to stabilize himself before starting to heave his arm that held onto his protesting luggage whilst rotating his wrist.
Unfortunately this caused the Flenemon to start to swing about in a parabolic arc that eventually turned into a full-on circular motion as he spun the poor monster about like a bola.
Then with a grunt, Gerald let go and sent the monster shooting upwards into the colourful cave entrance.
“Nice,” he congratulated himself before trailing downwards in a fit of wheezing giggles.
“Now what the fuck shot us in the nads before?” he wondered. Because if he was going to going about dishing out petty revenge, he might as well get it all done in one trip.
Advertisement
- In Serial218 Chapters
Secrets of the Universe
What is strength before me? What is talent before me? What are you--before me?I am Chaos, The Destroyer of worlds, The God of Combat, The Purple Demon, The Akashic Eye.Do you want to be like me? It wasn’t an easy feat. How to be a badass? I can’t teach you that for I was born that way.Okay, I will compromise and teach you this time, but beware, the way of a badass is filled with obstacles.What are you waiting for? Read my book.*Sighs* I am too lonely. Is this what it means to be unparalleled? I guess I will take a nap now.When will that youngster finish reading my book? Don’t keep me waiting too long, young lad.
8 163 - In Serial11 Chapters
The Economics of Emotion
Walking an empty life, he was granted a new start within a story of his own making. Instead of being able to walk the life of a mc he was designated the role of a side villain, an intentional loose end as there was no real “role” outside of being the villain. Unneeded and unwanted in this story but granted a new lease on life he decided to take up the role of the lead villain and to rest control of his story back into his own hands! --------- Participant in the Royal Road Writathon challenge November 2021!
8 95 - In Serial10 Chapters
Knight X Magic
When three great walls were put up to protect humanity from the darkness that lurks outside. They realise that they're running low on soldiers and time, so decided to let people age 15 to be able to enter and help humanity pushed further beyond they could ever do in their history of time they have been alive. But the question remains on how they will do it and when they will do it?
8 105 - In Serial19 Chapters
The Boy of the Slums
Is he a cursed child who killed his parents? Is he the reason why his village was burned? Or maybe just a poor kid who found himself in the slums without anything? Ray did not know why his parents were dead or why villagers hated him. But what he did know was that you cannot sleep not having eaten for days. He knew you cannot eat having your food taken away. So what will he do? Simple – take it all back.
8 179 - In Serial21 Chapters
Dear Marcus
This is a second chance romance between Marcus Volturi and Bella Swan's Aunt Alexis.
8 448 - In Serial6 Chapters
Smile with me (Bible X Jeff)
Bible and Jeff both are final year university students who are currently trying to finish their Art Degree. They built up good friendship and also always helped each other. Because of their good terms suddenly they wanted to turn their friendship into more than that.Not only they spending their lovely time but also trying to do some of thriller things after they graduate. Nobody knows what will happen when they started to trying new thriller adventures.
8 74

